Home
by clarabella75
Summary: Bella Swan returns to Forks to say goodbye.  Her past and present collide, revealing secrets and opening old wounds. Will Bella be able to finally find her way home again?
1. Chapter 1  Home

**A/N: Hello, again! I know I have a couple of fics that got started, and I was supposed to finish one of those...however, this idea came to me, and it's rolling out much faster than the other half-ass ideas I've had lately! :)**

**Thank you to my RL bestie, Gale, for being my sounding board and my pre-reader! She sends me tons of pictures for inspiration, holds my hand through my ADD writing tendencies, yells at me when I've been lazy, and giggles like a school girl when the voices start in my head again! You rock, girlie! :)**

**Special thanks to my new beta, Claire Bloom. She takes my semi-polished work and turns it into something magical! I have learned so much from you already, hun, and could never thank you enough for agreeing to be a part of this! :)**

**OFFICIAL DISCLAIMER: TWILIGHT AND ALL ITS PUBLICLY RECOGNIZABLE CHARACTERS ARE THE PROPERTY OF STEPHENIE MEYER. NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT IS INTENDED.**

**Okay, enough business! It's time to go...HOME.**

**CHAPTER ONE**

"**I know they say, you can't go home again,**

**I just had to come back one last time..."**

_**The House That Built Me, Miranda Lambert**_

**Bella**

Rain. Pouring rain. Torrential, blinding rain. The kind of rain that washed out bridges and flooded basements. The kind of rain that made grandmothers turn off the radio and hunch over the steering wheel or just pull over until it slowed down enough to be able to see again.

_Whoosh Whoosh Whoosh_

The windshield wipers weren't doing much good, not that it mattered. If I had been human I wouldn't have been able to make out anything past the hood of my car. As it was, the wipers were merely a habit, left over from my years of driving while looking through human eyes. It also stopped people from staring, as they stood on sidewalks or out of car windows, when I drove past. I was driving along the highway, and even though I was barely noticing the landscape passing by outside the windows, I could feel I was close.

Slowly, the trees began to thin out; as much as they ever did in this part of the country.

Through the downpour, I could make out the street sign indicating the road I was navigating was no longer the 101, but North Forks Avenue. I knew what was coming, just ahead, a few moments more...**Welcome to Forks.**

There was once a time in my life when I didn't care if I ever saw that giant, wooden sign ever again. A time when I thought that sign represented everything that had ever gone wrong in my life, when just the idea of going past it on my way out of town for the last time, was enough to get me through the day. I had thought about taking a can of spray paint to it on that last day, just to lessen the population number by one.

Today, though, that giant wooden sign was the most beautiful sight my road-weary eyes had ever seen. I slowed down to read the words.

**Welcome to Forks**

**Population 3,120**

Now, of course, the population had dropped by one number again.

Like magic, as soon as my back tires passed the city limits, the rain stopped. Well, I don't suppose it truly ever stopped raining in Forks, but it let up enough; the sound of the rain drops hitting the roof of my car no longer sounded like someone taking a hammer to my head. The town was deserted, as I had expected, it was the main reason I had timed my arrival for sometime in the middle of the night, as Forks was not a town known for its lively night time activities. All the storefronts on the main street were dark and deserted, the shopkeepers gone home to their families. The cafe' was open, but desolate, the flickering lights from the television above the counter the only indication anyone was inside. I knew, even without the benefit of my heightened senses, that Sandy, the owner and lone waitress, was perched on a stool watching E! News Daily, and slipping a little something extra into her coffee.

Winding through the narrow, tree lined street my car seemed to drive itself. I don't remember actually turning onto the road leading past the high school, but found myself staring out the window as I slowly drove by. I could almost see the parking lot full of cars, students milling around despite the dreary climate. My friends would be standing near the stone steps- Jessica in her new clothes, Mike in his Letterman jacket, Angela and Ben standing a little closer than necessary to see the picture window of her camera. I could clearly see the high, retaining wall. The once colorfully painted signs were now just soaking wet messes, the paint streaked, and running down the fragile paper, seeping into puddles on the sidewalk.

Again, as if on autopilot, my hands directed the car, and before I seemed to register it in my brain or even blink, I was there.

The house looked mostly the same. Same white paint, chipped around the corners. Same gravel drive, though it appeared to have newer gravel, same dark, wooden door with the glass storm door on the outside, same windows, same red shutters. The tree on the side of the house, next to the little bay window on the second floor, was taller, fuller...older. The cars in the drive were different, and the flowery mailbox cover, was new.

I turned off the headlights and cut the engine. I listened for signs of life from inside. I can't say how long I sat there, staring at that house, when the light in the kitchen came on. Instinctively, I craned my neck to try and get a look at the shadowy form. Of course, with the gauzy curtains on the window, all I could say for sure was that whoever was in the kitchen was a human. One look, that's all I wanted. One look at whoever was living there.

Glancing down at my watch, I realized it was nearly two in the morning. I wasn't going to get my one look tonight. No one was coming outside at this time of night, and if they did, they most likely wouldn't be all that amenable to a stranger sitting in her car, lurking in front of their house. Their house; simply thinking the words caused the burn of long-dried tears to sting my eyes.

As the light switched off, I blinked away the dry itch of tears that would never fall, and looked at the house again. My house; only it wasn't my house anymore. No one I knew lived in it. No one I loved and no one who even knew me. I took one last look at the little bay window on the second floor, started my car and drove away.

It was a rare, somewhat sunny day when I pulled back onto the street and stopped in front of the house. Gathering up every ounce of courage I could find, I stepped out of the car and made my way to the front door. My well rehearsed speech was turning to mush in my head, and I doubted if I'd be able to even introduce myself properly. I knew I could do what I came to do, with or without their permission, or even their knowledge, but I didn't want to scare them. I wanted them to allow me in, embrace my reasons for coming.

Sometimes, I wondered what kind of vampire I was.

_Apparently one who is afraid of a house with all of..._I listened for a moment..._three humans in it! Just try not to sound like a lunatic. You don't want to draw attention to yourself. _

With a final deep breath, I climbed the stairs, noticing on my way up the rickety metal railing I remembered so well, had been replaced with a sturdy, wrought iron one. Almost before I realized it, my hand went to the door knob, and I struggled to bring it down to my side. I reached up again, to knock this time, but before I could touch my knuckles to the wood the door swung open. I hadn't even heard her coming.

A thin, teenage girl stopped dead in her tracks as she took me in. Her long, blonde hair was streaked with blue and purple, and braided into pigtails which hung over her shoulders. She was dressed in what I can only describe as Catholic school girl gone wrong, wearing a gray and blue plaid skirt, hot pink and white layered tank tops, white leggings and purple Chuck Taylors. Looking at her, I felt decidedly grown up, despite appearing to be only two or three years her senior, in my favorite jeans and cable knit sweater. My own long hair was all the same color and held back with a thin headband. Of course, her fashion sense brought to mind another slight girl, dressed in her own way, bounding down the stairs...

_Not now. _ I reminded myself. _This isn't about...them..._

Putting a hand on her hip and sulking in a way only a teenage girl can, she eyed me up and down. Of course, I couldn't read her thoughts- that whole vampires-with-gifts thing seemed to be a true rarity- but the signs were pretty clear on her face. She thought I was beautiful, strange, maybe a little intimidating, even for someone as delicate and young as I seemed. She had no idea.

_And you are going to keep it that way, _I reminded myself.

I had no intention of doing anything to bring about any suspicion. I hadn't been a violent human, and I wasn't a violent vampire either. In fact, most others of my kind found me to be strange, an anomaly, so unlike any vampire they had ever encountered. I didn't think I was that much of an anomaly. There was a coven, yes, a coven of vampires who were exactly like me. The few others who knew of this coven sometimes asked why I didn't seek them out, and live with them, since I also fed in their strange way.

_Because even though I know about them, they don't know about me..._Though, I honestly hadn't worked out how or why that was.

"Hi," I said, returning my attention to the girl in the doorway, "I'm..."

"Not Katie," she huffed, rolling her eyes. Then she turned and headed for the stairs, calling over her shoulder, "Mom! David's girlfriend is here!" She stopped halfway up the staircase and gave me one more look, her eyes narrowed in curiosity, before shaking her head and disappearing.

The door was wide open, and I could see into the living room. The furniture was different, as I knew it would be, but still it looked the same. It smelled different, a strange mix of the old and the new. I caught the slightest aroma of Charlie's aftershave and fought the urge to burst inside and run upstairs to his bedroom. A moment later, a woman appeared from out of the kitchen and walked to the open door.

"Hello," she said, looking excited and dressed for company. "You must be Jenny!"

"No," I said. "I'm sorry, I'm not Jenny."

"Oh," she smiled. I watched as her brain registered my appearance. She, too, would find me beautiful and intriguing, yet somehow unsettling. "Well then, what can I do for you?"

_Make her comfortable, _I reminded myself.

"My name is Bella," I said, extending my hand to her. The air outside was cold, it was November after all, so the temperature of my hand shouldn't have alarmed her. "Bella Swan."

A look of recognition crossed her face. _Odd._

"Yes, of course," she said, holding her hand to take mine. "I'm Maggie Henry. It's nice to meet you, Bella."

"You, too, Mrs. Henry," I said.

"I'm sorry to bother you when you're obviously expecting company," I said, "but I just, well, I was wondering...what I mean to say is..." Even if I had still been human, I don't think I could have mangled my words so badly.

_So much for not sounding like a lunatic._

Mrs. Henry still had my hand in hers, the heat from her touch radiating through my hand and up my arm, and she reached up with her free hand to pat my shoulder. "You just want to have a look around?"

"Excuse me?" I asked. I hadn't actually gotten around to telling her exactly who I was, or explaining why I was knocking on her door.

"You want to have a look around?" Mrs. Henry repeated. "You _are_ Bella Swan?"

I nodded. _Nice use of all those fancy, vampire dazzling abilities, Swan._

**End Notes: ****Chapter Two will be up in minutes...read it and then REVIEW PLEASE! :)**


	2. Chapter 2  Boxes

**A/N: Nothing to say here since this is posting at the same time as Chapter One...**

**I own a fabulous new pair of yoga pants I got on sale at Target! I do not, sadly, own Twilight or anything associated with it- unless you count the books, the movies and a million pics of Rob and Kellan! :)**

**CHAPTER TWO**

"**I thought if I could touch this place, or feel it,**

**This brokenness inside me might start healing..."**

_**The House That Built Me, Miranda Lambert**_

**Bella**

"You used to live here, right?" Maggie Henry was asking me. She still had my hands clasped in hers.

Again, my faculties failed me, and all I could do was nod. Feeling flustered and unsure, while common when I was human, was unusual in my life as a vampire. I had become accustomed to following my instincts and being prepared. That I was reacting so emotionally to this place made me feel more human than I had in a long time.

"Then you should come in," Mrs. Henry said. "That is why you're here, isn't it?"

I smiled. "Well, yes. I mean, if that's okay. I can come another time if it would be better, more convenient for you," I babbled. God, I had been more well spoken on my first day at Forks High.

"Nonsense, dear," Maggie said. "Come in, please."

"Thank you," I said.

Mrs. Henry ushered me inside and closed the door behind us. She held her hand out toward the kitchen and asked, "Would you like some coffee?"

"Please," I said. "Thank you." Obviously, I wasn't going to actually drink anything, but I wasn't going to be impolite.

"Sit down," she said, motioning to a chair at the small breakfast table. It wasn't as small as Charlie's had been, nor was it was made of metal and formica. This was a real family table- pretty, light wood with chairs to match and seat cushions.

I sat down, and as Mrs. Henry stood in front of the coffee pot, that ironically sat in the same space on the counter as it had when I lived here, my mind wandered. I was amazed, as I always was when I remembered my human life, at how clear the images were in my head.

_Charlie sitting at the table, reading the paper and pretending to listen to whatever I had to say. Charlie and I, eating dinner at ten o'clock because he had to work late. The night of Junior Prom, Charlie looking nearly as nervous as..._

_Stop it, Bella! This isn't about...Him..._

"Bella?"

I shook myself from my own mind to find Maggie looking at me, apparently waiting for the answer to a question I hadn't heard.

"I'm sorry?" I asked.

"Would you like cream for your coffee?" Mrs. Henry asked, smiling.

"Oh, no thank you."

Maggie sat in the chair opposite me and handed me a cup, then pushed the sugar bowl in my direction. I spooned what seemed like a decent amount into the coffee and stirred it absentmindedly.

"Mrs. Henry," I began.

"Maggie, please," she said.

"Maggie," I restarted, "I know this must seem crazy to you, and I really am sorry if I'm intruding. It's just that I haven't been here in, well, a really long time, and I know I have no right to ask you..."

"Bella," Maggie said softly, "I understand. I knew from our realtor that you were," she paused to choose her words, "estranged from your father when he passed away, and that you hadn't been home in some years. I understand you wanting to come and have a look around."

"Who was your realtor?" I asked. I don't know what possessed me to ask that other than the fact I wanted to know who in town was talking about me and my father, and our relationship.

"Diane Newton," Maggie said. "She said you were friends with her son in school."

"Mike," I said. "Yeah, we were friends." I stirred my coffee some more, not having a clue what to say or do next.

A boy, not much younger than me in actual years, came rushing into the kitchen. His hair was wet and slicked back on his head, but I could tell he needed a haircut because of the one unruly lock that kept falling in his eyes. It reminded me of _Him _and _His _hair. I tried again, to push the memories away, but they just refused to stay out of my head.

"Mom? Jenny?" He stopped when he saw me, realizing I was not the girl he thought would be sitting there. "Oh, I'm sorry. Ashley said Jenny was here."

He stared at me for a moment longer than he should have, especially with his girlfriend on her way to see him. That was the way it was, though. While in my human life I happily blended into the background, in this life I was often the most attractive woman in the room.

"Not yet," Maggie said. "David, this is Bella Swan."

"Nice to meet you," David said.

I smiled and nodded. "You, too."

"Bella used to live here," Maggie explained.

"Oh," David said. "Cool. Well, I hate to be rude, but..." The young man tore his eyes away from mine and looked at his mother.

Maggie smiled affectionately at her son. "Go on," she said, waving him off. When David was out of sight, Maggie said, "His girlfriend is coming to visit, and we've not officially met, so he's a little nervous."

"I feel his pain," I sighed, remembering a certain official meeting of my own years earlier.

Before I could once again attempt to explain my reasons for interrupting the Henrys' Saturday, Ashley bounded into the room.

"So," she said, hopping up onto the countertop. "You're not David's girl after all, huh?"

"Ashley," Maggie said, with a note of warning in her voice.

The girl hopped back down to the tile floor and leaned against the cabinets. "I'm Ashley," she said.

"Hi, Ashley," I said. "And, no, I'm not your brother's girlfriend. My name is Bella."

Ashley's eyes seemed to widen at my introduction, and she stood up a little straighter. "Bella?" she asked, curiosity lacing her voice. "Bella Swan? You used to live here, right?"

I nodded, "Yes."

"Hey, Mom, if you want, I'll take Bella upstairs," Ashley offered. It was the most polite thing she had said since opening the front door. "She can see what I've done with her old room. And that way, you can finish getting ready for Jenny."

"Well, how sweet of you, Ashley," Maggie said, eyeing her daughter as though an alien had just walked into the kitchen. "Thank you. You'll be in good hands, Bella."

"Come on," Ashley said, pushing off the counter and gesturing for me to get up.

Following Ashley up the stairs, I recalled, again with perfect clarity, how the room at the top of the stairs had looked the last time I'd been inside. When I walked through the door, I was shocked to find it really wasn't all that different. Sure, my furniture was gone, but the walls were the same color and the twinkle lights...

_I bought those twinkle lights at a Christmas in July sale when 'she' had dragged me shopping against my will. They were my single purchase that afternoon, and 'she' had been adorably infuriated. _

And there they were, still strung along the ceiling. I wondered what had happened to all of my things. My clothes, my pictures, my books had been in their places when I'd left.

"I didn't change much," Ashley said.

"I can see that," I said, reaching up to touch the wall. I looked out to the small bay window. The tree outside had barely been visible before, but was now towering near the roof outside. There, in the corner...was that? "Oh my God," I breathed. I took the few steps over to the window and ran my fingers along the wooden slats in the back of the rocking chair.

"It's so pretty," Ashley said shrugging her shoulders. "Katie and Sara make fun of me for keeping it, but I like it. I couldn't get rid of it."

"It was my mother's," I said, once again sniffing back tears that would never form. I sat down in the chair and closed my eyes, slowly moving my feet to gently rock back and forth. Looking out of the window, I could almost see _Him_ perched on the tree limb outside, ready to make the leap inside. I couldn't stop the chuckle that escaped when I thought about the night Charlie nearly shot him, thinking he was a prowler. Charlie thought better of trying to do anything drastic like nailing the window shut, opting instead for the rule that my bedroom door would always remain open at night.

I could hear Ashley behind me, rummaging through her closet. There was shuffling and then a low thud.

"Here," she said, one hand on her cocked hip. "We took most of your clothes to Goodwill, but I think everything else is in here."

Ashley was pointing at a large cardboard box at her feet.

"What is that?" I asked.

"Your stuff," Ashley shrugged. She knelt down and pried the box open. "Pictures, CDs, books. You know; your stuff."

I fell from the chair to my knees in front of the girl. "This...these are all of my things?" I could hardly believe what she was saying.

"Yeah," she said. "I mean, it didn't feel right to just throw it all in the trash. What else was I gonna do with it?"

I couldn't help it. I leaned over and hugged her. "Oh God!" I cried. "I can't believe you...thank you!"

"It's just stuff," she said, trying to sound like it was no big deal.

"I know," I said, "but you have no idea how much this means to me."

Reaching inside, I pulled out the first item my fingers came into contact with, photograph. Nestled in the delicate wooden frame was a picture of me, my mother and step-father. I ran my fingers along the paper before setting the frame on the floor. The next item I retrieved was a CD. Several other CDs followed and sat in a stack on the floor. I emptied the box, pulling out ticket stubs from movies, notes from Angela and Jessica that I supposed had been inside my old desk drawers, photographs from school dances and Halloween parties. The last item I dragged from the box was my worn out copy of Wuthering Heights. Drawing it to my chest, I held it gingerly, taking a deep, albeit unnecessary breath. The scent hit me like an oncoming train. _His _scent. It was embedded in the paper from the countless times he had held the book and read to me. The aroma was stronger than it had ever been in my memory, perhaps because I had only ever smelled it, _Him_, with human senses. Now, however, with my enhanced olfactory abilities, the scent washed over me in a wave of honey and cloves that nearly engulfed me in their glorious notes.

Something fell from the pages, landing face down. I didn't need to turn it over. I knew it was a photograph, bookmarking the last place he had stopped. He'd probably been reading because I had fallen asleep to the sound of his voice.

"What's that?" Ashley asked.

"Nothing," I said, slipping the photograph back inside the book in the exact place it had fallen from. I looked around and noticed the box was now empty, its contents strewn all over the place. "I'm sorry," I said as I started gathering the items. "I've made a mess of your room."

"It's fine," Ashley said. "I didn't look through your stuff when I packed it away. I mean, just so you know."

I smiled at her. "It's okay if you did," I said. Then a thought occurred to me. "Ashley?"

"Hmm?" She was neatly stacking all the CDs back in the box.

"You said you gave most of my clothes to Goodwill?"

"Yeah," she said.

"What about the things you didn't take there?"

"Oh," she shrugged, "I kept some things." Suddenly, she dropped the CD she was holding and looked a little frightened. "I hope that's alright," she said. "I mean, some of what you had was my size and was...interesting...so I just figured...you can have it all back...well, except for what I redesigned. You probably won't want those back, but...some of it should still be in tact..."

"Ashley," I said. "Take a breath." Ashley shook her head and took in a massive amount of air. "I don't mind," I said. "And I don't want any of my clothes back. What do you mean by redesigned?"

"Some of the shirts were too big so I cut them up, and used the pieces to add to new clothes or stuff I already had." Ashley jumped up and went to the closet. She pulled out a hanger with a denim skirt on it. I could see from across the room the little scraps of fabric that had once been my clothes, sewn into the material. "See?" She held up the hanger proudly. "This skirt was totally boring, but I took a couple of your old t-shirts and made patches out of them. Katie and I sewed them on with bright thread and voila! New skirt!"

God, she reminded me so much of _Her_- so much fashion ingenuity, but without the unending bank account to shop for it all.

While Ashley replaced the hanger in the closet, I lifted a photograph off the stack and looked into the faces on the small image.

"Were those your friends?" Ashley asked, sitting down on the floor across from me.

"Mmmhmm," I said. I handed her the photo. "That's Jessica on the left and Angela on the right. The dark haired boy is Eric, and the other one, that's Mike Newton. His mother sold your parents this house."

"Oh," she said, studying the faces in her hands. "And that's you in the middle, right? I mean, it looks like you, but..."

_Time to go, _I thought. She'd noticed the changes as well as the similarities in me from the photograph. I didn't look any older, and physically I was frozen at six months past the date the picture had been taken. But I looked different; smoother, brighter, paler skin and longer, shinier hair. And the eyes, once a deep brown but now a strange shade of honey and amber.

"Hang on," Ashley said, rising off the floor, taking the photograph with her. She walked to her desk and opened the middle drawer. She reached inside and slid her hand along the top panel. I heard a distinct click as she pressed a secret spot inside. When she did, the side of the desk popped open revealing a hidden compartment. Ashley knelt down beside the desk and reached into the small space. What she pulled out from her hiding place would have knocked me to my own knees, if I'd been standing.

The book she carried was small, leather bound and full of heartache for me. Within those pages were scores of photographs of the people I had once believed would be my eternal family. Some of the photos were candids, some were posed shots. Some of them were blurry and some of them, those that had been taken with a better trained eye, were in perfect focus. All of them were images of the life I had wanted, the life I had expected. The life I didn't get.

Holding my breath, I watched carefully as Ashley retook her position on the floor in front of me. She sat closer to me, though, than most humans dared.

"I found this," she said, holding out the volume to me, "under one of the floorboards. It kept creaking when I walked over it, so I pulled it up one day and this was under there."

I wondered how the book had come to rest underneath the floorboards. When _they _left, every physical reminder I had of them had disappeared, taken I had assumed. Apparently, I had been mistaken.

I took the book from her, handling it almost as gingerly as I had the Bronte earlier.

"And these people," she said as she pointed at a new photograph underneath her fingers, "they all have the same eyes as you...well, like you do now. In the picture of you and your friends, your eyes...well, they're different now." The girl looked from me, to one photograph, back at me and down to the book. "See? In that one your eyes are brown."

Okay, now it was really time to go. She was asking too many questions which, for her, just didn't have answers.

"Yeah," I shrugged. "I wore contacts in high school." I hoped against hope that what little dazzling abilities I seemed to have would work, and she would just accept what I said.

"Oh," she said. "So, these people in the book? Are they your family? Were you, like, adopted or something?"

"Something like that," I said.

As if on cue from a God I wasn't sure I believed in anymore, Maggie appeared in the doorway.

"I hope she isn't boring you to tears," she said.

Ashley and I rose from the floor, the photo album still in my hands.

"Not at all," I said genuinely. She was anything but boring. "Ashley was just showing me some of my old things she's held onto." I went to hand the album back to her. Suddenly the weight of it felt heavy in my hands.

"Keep it," she said. "It's yours after all. And here," she leaned over and removed Wuthering Heights from the box. "Take this one, too."

I took the Bronte from her and held it to my chest.

"There's a box in the downstairs closet," Maggie said hesitantly. "It has some of...your father's things in it. Would you like to have that?"

I simply nodded. Once again, speech failed me. It was no wonder the other vampires I knew thought I was an oddity. I couldn't even form coherent sentences in this place with these people. My connection to my human life was far from severed, even though everyone I had known was either gone from this place, or lying in the ground.

Mute, I followed Maggie down the stairs and stopped behind her at the closet. She opened it and pushed several winter coats out of the way before standing up with a small box in her hands.

"It isn't much," she said. "But it's what was left in the bedroom. There are a couple of photographs and a box with some jewelry in it, a watch, I think, and a wedding band. Oh, and there's an old flannel shirt in there, too. I don't know why I put it in there, but..."

As she said the words, I inhaled, taking in the scent of my father flowing from within the confines of the box.

"You have no idea what this means to me," I said.

"Hey," Ashley interjected, "what about the rocking chair? We can have it sent to wherever you live now."

Smiling, I looked up at the girl who was perched on the banister. "No," I said. "You keep that. Take good care of it." I took the box holding my father's belongings from Maggie. "I have all I need, right here."

**End Notes: Okay...what do you think? Hit that pretty little button down there and let me know! :)**

**~cb**


	3. Chapter 3 Fear

**A/N: I am so excited about the response to this little fic so far! Thank you to all of you who have already put it on your favorites list/story alert! That makes me so happy! :)**

**Thanks to my fantastic new Beta, Claire Bloom- you are the best thing that has happened to me and my writing in forever! Thank you for your hard work and for making this so much better than it is when it gets to you!**

**As always- I own lots of things, unfortunately, Twilight isn't one of them! That lucky SM still has dibs!**

**CHAPTER THREE**

"**Call him Voldemort, Harry. Always use the proper names for things. Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."**

_**Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, p.298**_

**Alice**

"Alice, I really don't think this is a good idea," Rosalie said.

I ignored her and continued packing my messenger bag. "I don't remember asking for your opinion, Rose," I said.

Rosalie huffed and put her hands on her hips. "Fine, I'll just tell Edward what you're up to, and he'll stop you," she threatened.

"No, he won't," I smiled and tapped my temple with my finger. "As soon as you mention her name, he'll scream at you to shut up and leave. Don't try and think it either. That really pisses him off, you know."

"I swear," Rosalie sniped, "it's like living in a Harry Potter book! All this She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named bullshit! It's ridiculous!"

I sat on the edge of the bed and looked at my sister. Rosalie had been cold to Bella, to say the least, and downright bitchy too, if we were being totally honest. Still, though, even Rosalie could see leaving Bella had been the hardest thing our brother had ever done. The fact that he'd asked us to leave as well, had been hard on us all. Rosalie was still a little bitter about that.

"It's been five years," I said. "Get over it already."

"I'll get over it when he gets over it," Rosalie said as she turned and walked out of my bedroom.

I continued to pack my messenger bag, hearing Jasper approach. He came to stand behind me, lacing his hands around my waist and pulling me to his chest.

"She has a point, you know," he drawled. "This may not be the best idea you've ever had."

"I know," I sighed. "But I saw it for a reason, Jasper. She's going back to Forks because something has happened, something bad. You didn't see her. She looked so sad..." I thought back to the vision I'd had, the night before.

_Bella sitting in a car, staring at her old house. Bella navigating the winding drive which led to our home in Forks. Bella kneeling on the ground, placing a man's watch on a large stone._

The images may not have been in perfect focus, but the emotion was there. Bella was in pain; deep, soul wrenching pain. I didn't care how long it had been, or what my idiot brother had told her about it being like we never existed, I was going to Forks to see her. She didn't have to know I was there, but I was going.

"We could just ask Carlisle to call someone in Forks," Jasper suggested, "someone at the hospital maybe. They might be able to give him some information."

"Look, Jasper," I sighed, pulling out of his embrace. "No one knows why I see what I see, when I'm not looking. And I swear I haven't been looking! Not once in five years have I looked for her. But last night, there she was. And I don't think it's a coincidence that it happened when Edward wasn't home. I think whatever forces are behind this vision, I was supposed to see it, but Edward wasn't supposed to know about it. Now, I have to be gone before he gets back." I shoved the last items into my bag and kissed Jasper on the cheek.

"Promise me you'll be careful," he said. "And call me along the way."

"I will," I said. "And you promise not to think about where I am, and to keep Rosalie quiet."

"I'll talk to Emmett," Jasper chuckled. Keeping Rosalie quiet was going to be the most difficult part. I hadn't intended for her to know about my vision or my upcoming trip, but she'd overheard because I hadn't taken Jasper far enough away from the house when I'd confided in him.

Jasper took my face in his hands and kissed me lightly. "If you do...talk to her..." he said, "will you tell her...I'm sorry?"

"I will," I said, kissing him again. "Though, if I know Bella, you have nothing to be sorry for."

"I love you," he smiled.

"I love you, too."

Two days later, I was in Forks. I had taken a flight from our current home in Vermont to Seattle, and run the rest of the way. I headed straight for the street Bella and her father used to live on, stopping in the woods behind the house.

I could hear people inside, and smell them, but neither the voices nor the scents were familiar. It was obvious whomever lived in the house now, wasn't Bella or her father. I also picked up another scent, one that both confused and frightened me. It was a female vampire, and I couldn't shake the feeling I should recognize it somehow. That was the confusing part; vampires never forgot a scent, but I couldn't seem to put my finger on why this scent seemed to be one I knew. The thought that another vampire had been here, where Bella used to live, was also frightening. Who was she, and why on Earth had she been here?

I set off across town, toward the home my family still owned. I slowed down once I reached the driveway and walked at a leisurely pace, sniffing the air around me. The scent was there as well, only stronger, indicating the vampire it belonged to hadn't been gone long. Again, I worried I was missing something in the scent. It still smelt somewhat familiar, like Bella's scent was mixed in there, too. Was she with this other vampire? I was, strangely, totally stumped.

Instead of lingering at the house, asking myself questions I didn't have answers to, I ran back towards town. I closed my eyes and inhaled, taking in the strange scent again, and letting it lead me to my next destination.

I was back in the woods on the edge of town when my phone buzzed in my pocket.

"Hey, Jasper," I answered.

"Hey there," he said. "Are you in Forks?"

"Yes," I said. "I've been to Bella's house, only someone else lives there now. And I've just left our house. I haven't found her yet, but something is definitely not right here."

"How do you mean?" Jasper asked.

"I mean there's another vampire in Forks," I said, "a female."

"What?" Jasper asked, alarm in his voice. "Who is it? Victoria?"

"That's the weird part," I explained. "It's not anyone I know, and yet the scent seems very familiar, like I _should _know it. I can smell Bella, too, but it's so intermingled with the vampire...I don't know what to make of it."

"You have to find her," Jasper said.

"I know," I agreed. "I've followed the scent from our house to the cemetery. That's where I am now. I'm going to look around."

"Call me as soon as you know something," Jasper pleaded.

"I will." I ended the call and put the phone back in the pocket of my messenger bag.

Walking around the border of the cemetery, I was grateful the trail had led there, not so many scents to decipher in a graveyard. I followed the trail, eyes closed, and stopped when it was most concentrated. Slowly, I opened my eyes and looked out from the trees.

I could see her, kneeling on the ground in front of a relatively fresh grave. From my position in the trees, I couldn't make out the etching on the stone, but knew from her posture; head bent, shoulders shaking, that the grave must belong to Charlie. That's why Bella had seemed so sad in my vision. That's why someone else was living in their house. Charlie Swan was dead. I wondered what had happened to him. Did he have a heart attack? Was he killed in the line of duty? Had he been in a car accident?

I wondered for a moment about the other vampire. Was she nearby? Did she know I was there?

Bella reached into her pocket and pulled out a silver wristwatch, placing it on top of the stone, exactly as I had seen she would. She leaned back on her heels and ran her fingers along the words on the granite. Just then, a light breeze picked up, blowing her hair across her back and her scent in my direction.

Instinctively, I inhaled.

_Holy. Shit._

I inhaled again.

Bella's scent.

The vampire's scent.

It was the same.

Before I could react, the wind changed direction, blowing towards Bella. She jumped off the ground and spun around, crouched on the balls of her feet and searching her surroundings. I couldn't stop the audible gasp that escaped my lips when I saw Bella's eyes. They were the exact color of my own.

_Bella is a vampire?_

_Bella is a vampire._

Bella was still crouched on the grass, frantically searching the tree line. Taking a deep breath, I stepped out from behind my cover and into the open.

"Bella?" I whispered.

Her head jerked in my direction, and she rose quickly to her feet. Seeing her move so lithely and gracefully almost made me laugh.

"Bella?" I whispered again.

Before even I could register her movement, Bella was standing in front of me. For a fraction of a second, she stared, her disbelief mirroring my own. Then she backed away slowly, one step at a time, until she was at least ten feet away.

"Alice?" she asked, fear and desperation lacing her words. Then she closed her eyes and spoke to herself, "You're hallucinating. She isn't really there."

"I'm here," I said as calmly as I could. "I'm here, Bella. And you're...you're..." I couldn't bring myself to form any other words.

The disbelief in her eyes changed, first to recognition that I was, in fact, standing there, then to what I could only describe as absolute fury. A low growl emanated from deep within her chest as she stalked towards me. I didn't want to go on the defensive, but the look in her golden eyes told me I needed to be careful. She was pissed off.

"Bella," I said slowly. "Bella, listen to me. We need to talk."

Bella shook her head and laughed, "Talk? We need to talk?"

"Yes," I said. "I think we do."

"Why don't _you _talk, Alice?" Bella snapped at me. "Why don't you tell me why my best friend abandoned me? Tell me where you've been for the last five years? Tell me why you didn't see..."

The fury in Bella's eyes was quickly replaced with despair. She wanted answers. Some weren't mine to give, like why my entire family had picked up, and left in the middle of the night. Some I didn't have, and wanted just as badly as she did, like why I had no idea she had become one of us.

"Bella, please," I begged.

Bella ignored my plea and came at me, fists balled up and flailing. She knocked me to the ground and took swing after swing at me. I twisted and ducked as best I could, but she was fast, her fury making it difficult for me to see her next move before she made it. I managed to roll out from underneath her because she hadn't pinned me down, but she was fast on my heels.

"Bella," I called over my shoulder as I ran. "Please! I know you must be angry, but..."

I was flying through the air, crashing into a tree when she screamed at me, "Angry? You think I'm angry? No, angry doesn't even _begin _to describe what I'm feeling!"

The huge tree buckled under the force of the impact, and I landed on the ground in a rather ungraceful heap. There were leaves in my hair and my skirt was torn. My messenger bag was holding onto my body by a thread. Bella's outrage caught me off guard, and my outfit was taking the fall. I decided I wasn't going to run anymore.

"Pissed off," Bella said as she grabbed me by the arm and flung me back up into the trees, "scared, confused!" Each word was emphasized with another toss of my body around the forest. "Terrified! Enraged, and not to mention lonely!"

"I can't imagine, Bella," I said, landing on my feet that time.

Bella grabbed me by my shoulders and held on tightly. "I thought when I saw you again..._if_ I saw you again...any of you...I thought it would be..." Her hands fell from my shoulders and she paced the forest floor, pulling at her hair.

"I'm sorry," I said quietly. "Bella, please, I'm so sorry."

Bella stopped pacing, straightened out her clothes, smoothed out her hair and stared at me. "This isn't about you. That's not why I came here. I came here to say goodbye to my father. I promised myself this wouldn't be about..._him..._"

"It isn't," I said. "Edward doesn't know I'm here." Bella winced at the mention of my brother. I wondered if she, like Rosalie, had her own Harry Potter Theory. I smiled and laughed lightly, "You know, he won't let us say your name either."

Bella let out a short laugh, "That doesn't surprise me." She turned and looked back towards the cemetery. "I'm going to say goodbye to my father now," she said. "Go home, Alice."

"But..."

"No," she said harshly. "Go home. Go back to Jasper, back to your family. Go home and forget you found me. That should be easy enough for you."

"Jasper said to tell you he's sorry," I blurted out. I had no idea why I chose that moment to relay Jasper's message, I just knew I wanted to keep Bella there with me.

"That doesn't surprise me either," she said. "He has nothing to apologize for."

"I told him you'd say that," I said.

"I mean it, Alice. Please...just...go..." Bella said. She turned and ran back into the cemetery, retaking her place at Charlie's grave.

I watched Bella sit by her father for hours. Sometimes, she seemed to be talking, sometimes her shoulders shook from tears that would never really fall. Mostly, she sat in still silence, staring at the headstone. I wanted so badly to go to her, to comfort her. Her words were haunting inside my head.

_Tell me why my best friend abandoned me?_

_Tell me where you've been for the last five years._

_Tell me why you didn't see..._

That was the one which bothered me the most. Why hadn't I seen what happened to bring about the end of Bella's human life? I wished I could see into the past as easily as I saw into the future. When the sun had long disappeared behind the trees, and the stars were peeking out from behind the clouds, Bella rose from her spot on the ground. She looked out into the trees where I was still standing.

"Please, Alice," she begged quietly. "Don't tell..."

"Bella..." I begged in return. How could she ask me not to tell him? Did she somehow forget he could read minds? Even if I didn't say the words, I couldn't block him out completely for that long. Eventually, he would see it in my mind.

"Tell Jasper I said it's okay," she whispered. "Promise me."

"I promise," I said. I hoped she realized I was answering both of her requests.

And then she was gone.

I pulled my phone from my now tattered bag and called Jasper.

"Hey," he said. "I was beginning to worry."

"Where are you?" I asked. I needed to be sure he was nowhere near anyone in the family. I couldn't risk any of them overhearing what I was about to tell him.

"It's alright," he said. "I'm hunting alone."

"I found her," I said.

"Is she okay?" Jasper asked, frantic for answers.

"Sort of," I replied.

"Well, did she see you? Did you talk to her?"

"She saw me," I said, "but she did most of the talking."

"And the other vampire?" Jasper asked.

"I saw her, too," I said. I knew I was being short and cryptic, but I didn't quite know how to form the words.

"And?" Jasper asked, alarmed. "Who is she? Why is she in Forks?"

"She came to Forks to say goodbye to someone," I said. "Her father died and...Oh, Jasper, I can hardly believe it..."

"Alice, honey," Jasper said, slowly drawing out his words. I was sure he was wishing his gift worked over the phone and he could calm me into speaking coherently. "You aren't making any sense."

"It's Bella," I said. "That's why the scent seemed familiar. It was Bella's."

"But you said it was a vampire," he stated. Clearly, Jasper was hoping he was wrong about what I had implied.

"It is," I said plainly. "I wasn't picking up two different scents, just one; Bella's."

"Are you saying...?"

"Bella is a vampire," I said, shocked at how strange the words actually sounded, coming from my lips.

The line was silent, and for a moment I thought perhaps we'd been disconnected.

"Jasper?" I asked. "Did you hear me?"

"I heard you," he said. "I'm just...how the hell did that happen?"

"I don't know," I said. "She wouldn't tell me."

"My God, Alice," Jasper said. "Do you know what this means? Shit! Edward is going to..." I could hear the panic rising in his voice.

"We can't tell him, Jasper," I said, remembering my promise to Bella.

"Are you insane?" Jasper asked. "How are we supposed to do that? Even if we never say it aloud, we can't _not _think about it!"

"I don't know," I said a little more abruptly than I should have, "but I promised her!"

Jasper sighed, "I guess we'll think of something."

"I'll head for home in the morning," I said. The only was I was going to figure anything out was with Jasper's help. "Oh, and Jasper," I added before saying goodbye, "Bella said to tell you there is nothing to apologize for."

I ended the call and put my phone away. I had no idea what to do next. Should I follow Bella? Try and make her talk to me again? Should I leave her alone or would that only be abandoning her again? The only thing I knew for sure was, I had until I returned home to learn of a new way to keep Edward out of my head.

**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
End Notes: Reviews are the only payment any of us get for writing and entertaining one another! So, hit that little button down below and let me know what you think! **


	4. Chapter 4 Memories for Tomorrow

**A/N: Nothing special to report today...just the usual...it's not a very long chappie, but another old friend makes an appearance!**

**Thank you, G, for being my sounding board!**

**Claire Bloom- you seriously ROCK! :)**

**SM still owns...I just play!**

**CHAPTER FOUR**

"**In an ordinary fairy tale land, there's a promise of a perfect happy end,**

**And I imagine having just short of that is better than nothing..."**

_**Forever and Almost Always, Kate Voegel**_

**Bella**

I knew, as I sat talking quietly to my father, that Alice was still in the trees. In between apologies to Charlie, I replayed what had happened with her. I could hardly believe I had actually thrown her around the forest. Not that I was surprised at my ability, but this was Alice. She had been my best friend, the closest thing I had to a sister, and I'd tossed her around like a rag doll. I always thought when I saw her again I would hug her first, and yell at her later. However, when I saw her standing in front of me, I snapped. All the hurt and anger came flooding out of me like a hurricane, and I took it out on her.

After the sun had set, and I'd said my final goodbyes to my father, I stood and faced the trees.

"Please, Alice," I pleaded with her, "Don't tell..." She tried to interrupt me with a plea of her own, but I wouldn't listen. "Tell Jasper I said it's okay," I told her. "Promise me."

"I promise," she said just as I located her face in the trees.

I turned and ran as fast as I could, hoping Alice wouldn't follow, back to my car. As had been the case since my arrival, I didn't remember actually driving to the Cullens' house, but there I was, staring at the empty mansion. I got out of my car and went to the front door. I broke through the glass panel and let myself inside.

Everything was covered in dusty white sheets. I went around uncovering furniture, stopping in front of the grand piano in the living room. Fuzzy images rushed into my mind of _Him_, sitting on the glossy black bench, his fingers gracefully gliding over the keys, playing my lullaby.

Choking back the sob in my chest, I pounded my fist into the wood over, and over again until shards of wood and ivory were scattered around the entire room. The fury inside my still heart didn't subside, though, and I moved on to the other furniture in the room. I smashed tables and shredded sofas, until there was nothing left. The long glass dining room table was a pile of sand and twisted metal when I was finished with it. I ripped paintings off the walls and punched holes in the canvases. The mantle over the fireplace crumbled when I kicked it.

The complete destruction didn't take longer than a minute or two, and when I was done, I sat on the floor surrounded by sofa stuffing and piano keys. I lay back on the floor and willed the memories creeping into my mind to go away.

_Alice dressing me up, like a Barbie doll._

_Rosalie walking in, seeing me and turning on her heels to leave the room._

_Esme cooking for me, in the kitchen._

_Emmett and Jasper, playing Guitar Hero on the flat screen television. _

_Carlisle stitching me up after one mishap, or another._

I gave in, and allowed the memories of the last time I had been inside this house, to take over.

_My birthday; I had told Alice I didn't want a party, but she'd insisted. She had decorated the entire house with candles and bought me a cake. Everyone had gotten me a present, even Rosalie. She said Alice picked it out, and told me what it was before I even opened it, but I didn't mind. Emmett was so proud of his present, a new stereo for my old truck. The look on Esme's face when she and Carlisle gave me their small, shiny box was so sweet and motherly. I didn't want to tear the wrapping, so I slid my finger underneath the thick paper...Carlisle put more stitches in my arm that night than any other night before..._

I hardly saw the sun beginning to filter through the curtains as it rose. In fact, if I hadn't heard the rapid heartbeat, and taken notice of the stench coming from outside, I might have lay on the floor all day long. As it was, the sound of the heartbeat was getting louder and the stench stronger. So I pulled myself up, off the floor, and walked to the back window. I couldn't see anything, animal or human, but I could tell whatever was out there, was standing just inside the tree line.

I opened the back door and inhaled, nearly gagging as the scent assaulted my nostrils. Stepping carefully and quietly down the steps, I headed in the direction of the offending smell.

"Come out, come out wherever you are," I whispered.

There was a crunching of leaves as whatever it was, came towards me. I saw the eyes first, big, round and black. I took an instinctive step backwards as the creature came into view. Standing at least six feet tall at the shoulders, the largest wolf I had ever seen slowly, and methodically stepped out of the trees.

I crouched on the balls of my feet, ready to spring, and growled, "Stay back!"

The wolf stopped and seemed to be studying me carefully, his head cocked to one side.

"I mean it," I shouted. "Stay back!"

Slowly, never taking his eyes off me, the wolf backed into the trees. I heard a swirling of leaves and forest debris, and assumed the creature had run away. That's when I heard his voice.

"Bella?" he whispered.

I hadn't heard his voice in over five years, but I knew it was him.

"Jacob?" I called into the trees. Could it be? And if it was, what in the hell was going on?

He didn't answer me. I listened as the heartbeat thrummed faster. Then, as quickly as it had come, the sound of his heart and his scent faded away.

I took off into the forest, following the scent. As putrid as it was to my senses, I had to find out what had just happened. A giant wolf had come into the Cullens' back yard and skulked away, only to be replaced by the sound of Jacob Black's voice, calling my name. If I had thought it possible for me to be insane, that would have been the only explanation I could offer. As it was, I was sick and tired of not getting the answers I wanted. I might not have been able to get any out of Alice, but I was sure as hell going to get something out of Jacob.

He was fast, and I pondered as I trailed along behind him, how it was possible. Running towards La Push, I remembered a day long ago, when Jacob had shared with me the legend of his tribe.

"_Did you know Quileutes are supposedly descended from wolves?" Jacob had asked me._

"_Wolves?" I had asked._

"_Yeah, wolves," he'd said._

Jacob had gone on to tell me about the legend of the Quileutes and the Cold Ones. Obviously, I knew the part about the Cold Ones was true, so did that mean...? Were the men in Jacob's tribe really descended from wolves? Was the wolf who'd come at me in the yard Jacob?

I followed the sound of Jacob's heartbeat and his scent, all the way to the woods behind his house on the reservation. I watched as he ran inside, flinging the screen door open and calling for his father.

"What's wrong?" I heard Billy ask. "Did you find them?"

"No," Jacob said, taking deep breaths, "it isn't them."

"Not them?" Billy asked. "Then who is it?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," Jacob said. "And I can't tell Sam! Dad, how am I going to keep this from Sam?"

I wondered who Sam was, and what Jacob was going to have to keep from him. Silently, I crept up to the house and crouched underneath the kitchen window.

"Calm down, son," Billy said. "Tell me, what happened when you went to the Cullens' place."

"She was there, Dad," Jacob cried. "And she's...she's one of them! It all makes sense now! Why she wasn't here when..."

"Who?" Billy asked. "Who was there?"

"Bella!" Jacob said, almost sobbing.

"Bella was at the Cullens'?" Billy asked, sounding more confused by the second. "What do you mean she's one of them?" his tone changed to one of hesitant understanding.

"A vampire, Dad!" Jacob screamed. "Bella is a..." Jacob stopped and inhaled slowly. "She's here," he whispered to his father.

Jacob stepped out onto the small back porch, dressed in only a pair of cut off jeans. I was nothing short of amazed at what the last five years had done for him. He was no longer a scrawny teenager, Jacob had muscles in places I had never imagined, and he was at least six-foot-five. His hair was cropped close to his head, and he had a tribal tattoo on his right arm. When he caught sight of me, his eyes widened in surprise and his heart skipped a beat.

"Jacob," I said.

"Bella," he choked out. His nostrils flared and fire flashed in his eyes. "What did they do to you?"

"Jacob, I think we need to talk," I said.

"You can't be here," he said. "If the others come, they'll...you can't be here."

Jacob was off the porch, forcing me back by the shoulders. I was so surprised that he could move me against my will, that I allowed him to push me. His head snapped from side to side like he was expecting someone to walk up.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"They'll be here soon, Bella!" Jacob cried. "Sam sent me to check out the Cullens' place! He'll smell you! He'll know! You have to go!"

"But, Jacob!" I begged my old friend. "We need to talk!"

"I know, Bella!" Jacob said frantically, "but not now, not here!"

I heard more than one pair of footsteps running through the woods, in the direction of Jacob's house.

"Whoever they are, they'll be here in about two minutes," I said, jerking my head from side to side in search of the visitors.

Jacob let go of my shoulders and ran to the woodpile beside the old shed next to his house. He tossed logs and branches into a pile and doused them in lighter fluid.

"Give me your jacket!" he yelled at me.

"What?" I said, taking off my jacket and tossing it to him.

Jacob tossed my jacket into the fire, the material going up in sparks of purple and blue, and turned to me.

"Go!" he hissed. "Run! Run as fast as you can!"

"But, Jacob..." I said as I started to back away.

"I'll find you!" he cried. "Please, Bella! Just run!"

I could hear the heartbeats of the visitors as they approached. I ran quickly into the woods and climbed up a tree. I could barely make out the three of them as they ran into Jacob's yard. I was too far away to hear all of what they were saying, but I could see Jacob gesturing wildly at the fire he had thrown my jacket into. I watched as the others listened intently to what Jacob was saying, occasionally catching a phrase or two. "Filthy bloodsucker" seemed to be a favorite, although "good riddance" and "wish it had been a Cullen" made the top ten. When it seemed Jacob had finished his tale, the others patted him on the back, and appeared to be congratulating him.

As they filed into the house, Jacob took a hose to the fire. When the flames were extinguished, he stepped onto the porch and looked out into the trees.

"Tomorrow," he whispered, so quietly I had to read his lips to be sure of what he was saying.

I jumped from my perch and landed softly on the ground.

"Tomorrow," I whispered back as I ran away.

**End Notes: So...Jacob? What will he have to say to Bella now that he knows? Hit that pretty little review button and let me know what you think! :)**


	5. Chapter 5 The Only Exception

**A/N: I went to a Paramore concert recently, and when she was singing "The Only Exception" all I could think about was my Jacob and Bella...I'll admit I've never been a huge Jacob fan, he was a jerk and grated on my last nerve! But here, the circumstances are different so he's not such a bad guy. Here, he discovers the enemy lines aren't always easily defined, and both of them find that, sometimes, rules have exceptions...**

**Thanks, as always, to the wonderful, amazing, SuperBeta Claire Bloom! You make me better with every chapter! :)**

**SM owns...**

**CHAPTER FIVE- THE ONLY EXCEPTION**

"**...because none of it was ever worth the risk,**

**but you are the only exception..."**

_**The Only Exception, Paramore**_

**Bella**

Running back to the Cullen house, I decided I needed to hunt. With no other vampires around the area, I figured thinning out the deer population wouldn't be such a bad thing. When I was satisfied, I made my way back to the house and surveyed my previous destruction.

Looking around, I instantly regretted what I'd done. All of Esme's beautiful furniture was destroyed. I decided I would find a way to make it up to her. I would clean the place up, and have all new furnishings delivered before I left town. That way, when they came back, _if_ they ever came back, their home wouldn't be in shambles.

I paced around the backyard for hours, thinking about Jacob. Apparently, the legends he had shared with me, five years ago, were true. I was a vampire. Jacob was a wolf, and part of a pack, if his visitors were any indication. I tried to recall memories of Jacob and I as kids, fishing with Charlie and Billy. I thought I remembered always having my nose in a book, and there were sketchy images of Jacob shoving mud covered worms in my face. I struggled to recollect more recent human memories of me and Jacob. I knew he had gone to school on the reservation, but I had hazy impressions of the two of us spending time together. I considered asking Jacob to help me remember more. Who would have thought that two kids from Forks, Washington, would one day be transformed into creatures which people believed existed only in horror movies, and nightmares? 

From inside the house, I heard my phone beeping. I was getting a text message. I was getting a text message? No one had my phone number. I had no friends, vampire or otherwise.

Alice. It had to be Alice.

Retrieving my phone from the kitchen counter, I opened the text.

_Bella-_

_Don't worry about the furniture. Esme will redecorate anyway._

_Stay at the house as long as you like._

_I'd like to talk to you._

_Please reconsider._

_-Alice_

I shook my head and smiled. Alice and her visions. I should have expected as much.

I saved the number to my phone and put it back on the counter. I would worry about Alice later, Jacob was coming. I could hear the rapid beat of his heart approaching.

Stepping out onto the back patio, I saw him running out of the trees. The yard was quite large, and the tree line was at least a hundred yards away, but I could see him in detail. His brow was furrowed and he looked stressed. I also noticed, even though he had run on foot from La Push, he hadn't broken a sweat. Jacob faltered when he saw me watching him, but closed the distance quickly.

"Jacob," I greeted him, holding my breath because his wolf scent was really too much for my stomach to take. I wondered for a moment if the wolves smelled different to humans, even if they didn't quite register the variation. The stench was overpowering to me, and I had to wrestle the compulsion stirring inside of me to fight him.

"Bella," he sighed. "What the hell is going on?"

"I could ask the same thing," I said, cocking an eyebrow at him.

"When...how...I mean...did they...?" Jacob couldn't decide which question to ask first.

"After I left," I said. "I think you must know how. And no - it wasn't – them."

"Oh," Jacob said.

"Your turn," I said, smiling.

"Do you remember that day on the beach, not long after you moved here?" he asked.

"A little," I said. "I was thinking about that yesterday. So, they weren't just scary stories after all, huh? I mean, I think I remember, but sometimes it's hard to tell with human memories."

"Nope," Jacob said, waving his hand in my direction, "not just scary stories."

"And I gather we're supposed to be, like, mortal enemies or something?" I asked, almost laughing. The idea that Jacob and I, who had been friends since I was five, could be enemies of any sort was funny to me.

"The presence of vampires is what triggers the change in the men of the tribe. Sam phased first, six years ago, when the Cul..." I held up my hand to stop him before he said their name out loud. Jacob eyed me curiously and continued, "When _they _first came back. Once it started, we all phased; me, Jared, Paul, Embry, and Quil. When they left, we thought it would stop, but it doesn't really work that way. It's a good thing Sam sent me to check out the scent we picked up in the woods, or else..."

"That would have been me in the fire, along with my brand new, three hundred dollar jacket?" I asked playfully. I wasn't really amused at the idea, or upset about the jacket, but I was trying to lighten the mood a little.

"Yeah," he said solemnly. "Wait a minute. _You_ spent three hundred dollars on a jacket?" he asked, smiling. "You've changed in more ways than one."

I laughed, "I guess I have." I walked down the patio steps and sat on the bottom. "So," I said, "how does this whole mortal enemies thing, work exactly? They think you killed me, right?" Jacob nodded. "What happens now? Won't they smell me still? I don't know what I smell like to you, but you...you smell like a nasty, wet dog. I'd know if you were within ten miles of me."

"That's why you can't stay here, Bella," Jacob said. "You have to leave."

"Just keep them away from Forks for a few more days," I said. "I'll be gone soon enough."

"Why did you come here anyway?" Jacob asked.

"I had to say goodbye," I said, not meeting his eyes. "I was gone for so long, and I...I had to say goodbye to Charlie."

"I wondered where you were," he said. "I was afraid you wouldn't know what happened. How did you find out?"

"I get the local paper online," I answered. "I read his obituary." I was still surprised at the grief I felt for my father. Vampires weren't exactly known for their ability to mourn, yet I was saddened by Charlie's death. One of the clearer memories I had was of the last time I'd seen him. We'd had another argument, and I stormed out of the house. He stood in the doorway and watched me walk away. As I climbed into my truck I heard him say "I love you, baby." I didn't understand why, but I could still feel some of the insolence his calling me 'baby' brought out in the human teenager version of myself. I slammed the door and revved the engine, tearing from the driveway and leaving home.

"That must've sucked," Jacob said.

"Listen," I said, desperate to change the subject and not think about my father. "You should know Alice may be in the area, too." I might have been angry, but I didn't want Alice running into a pack of vampire-hating wolves while she was waiting for me to talk to her.

"Alice?" Jacob asked. "Which one is she?"

"Tiny," I said. "Dark, spiky hair."

"Are you telling me this because you want us to go after her?" Jacob smiled when he asked.

"No!" I said, panicking. "Please don't, Jacob! She's only here because of me! Please don't hurt her!"

"Okay, okay!" Jacob said, holding his hands out in a peaceful gesture. "I was only joking, but you should tell her to watch her back. If any of the others find her first..."

"I'll warn her," I said. I guess that answered the question of whether or not I would be talking to Alice again.

Jacob walked over to the patio steps and sat down beside me. "It's strange," he said, staring at me. "You look the same, but...not. You're so beautiful. I mean, you were always pretty, but, damn! And you're eyes, they aren't red. What's up with that?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Dietary side effect," I said. Jacob raised his eyebrows at me in confusion. "I don't feed on humans, Jacob."

"Oh, well, that's good I guess."

"What about you?" I asked. "I know it's been a long time, but you're, like, _huge_! Is that a wolf thing?"

"Yeah," he said, playfully flexing his biceps for me. "That's one of the perks. I grew about a foot when I first started phasing."

Jacob and I sat in companionable silence for a while, mostly because neither of us was sure what to say next.

"Will you tell me," he finally asked, "how it happened?"

"I'd rather not," I answered. "It was...horrible and painful and - well, it didn't exactly happen the way I had thought it would."

"What does that mean?" Jacob asked.

"It means I always thought I would end up a vampire one day, I just thought the circumstances would be different," I explained.

"I'm supposed to hate you," Jacob said.

"But you don't," I smiled.

"You're supposed to hate me, too," he said.

"But I don't," I said. "I guess there have to be exceptions to every rule."

"I could never hate you," he said. "I don't care that every fiber of my being is screaming at me to shred you into a million pieces, and watch you burn. When I look at you, Bella, I just see...you..." Jacob laughed, shaking his head.

"I know what you mean," I said. "It's like, in my very core, I want to hate you, to fight you, but I just...can't."

"It's a little unnerving, honestly, and Sam would rip me a new one if he knew. I'm going to have to be really careful around him for a while."

"He'll know you lied?" I asked. I was worried about what would happen if Jacob's lie was revealed.

"When we're in wolf form, we can hear each other's thoughts, so, yeah. I'll have to be really mindful not to think of you when the pack is together," Jacob explained.

"What's with everyone except me having some sort of supernatural ability?" I laughed.

"What are you talking about?"

"Alice can see the future. Jasper does this weird mood control thing. And - _He _can read minds, too."

"Oh," Jacob said, sounding really interested. "Hey, what's with the names? You can say Alice and Jasper, but not..."

"Don't," I said, probably a little too harshly. I sighed, "I'm sorry. I don't know why really. I just...can't..."

"Okay," he said.

From inside the house I could hear my phone beeping like crazy, I wondered what could have Alice in such a frenzy.

"I should get that," I said, standing up.

"I should go," Jacob said.

"Thank you," I said. "You know, for not shredding me into a million pieces and watching me burn."

"Anytime," Jacob smiled as he backed away towards the trees. "It was good to see you again. I've missed you."

"I've missed you, too. Seeing you again was the first good thing that's happened to me in long time, Jake."

"Be careful out there."

"I will," I said. "You, too."

"Goodbye, Bella."

"Bye, Jake."

And then he was gone, leaving me with another unsettling feeling of sadness.

**End Notes: So...? Bella's memories? Finding out about Charlie? The heart to heart with Jacob? What do you think? Reviews, people, reviews! :)**


	6. Chapter 6 Family Secrets

**A/N: Today you get Edward, but there are a couple of things I want to clear up first - **

**A) No worries, Bella has a power, she just doesn't know it yet. Patience, friends, she has quite a lot to discover on this journey! :) **

**B) Several people asked me about the Cullen-Quileuete treaty - I didn't forget about it or decide to leave it out. Keep reading!**

**Claire rocks as usual, as do my two RL best girls, G & L- all three of you make me want to keep doing this! Thanks, gals! :) My hubby is the best, too! He encourages me, doesn't bitch (too much) when I come to bed late, and tells me I'm good at what I do! Thanks, babe! I love you bunches! Oh, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY! **

**SM still owns, lucky girl! :)**

**CHAPTER SIX**

"**...and half of my heart is the part of a man who's never truly loved anything..."**

_**Half of My Heart, John Mayer**_

**Edward**

My family was acting strange. Well, stranger than usual anyway. Alice had been gone for days, and no one knew where she was, or if they did, they weren't telling me. They weren't thinking about it either, not even Jasper. He didn't think about her at all, just sang country and western songs in his head all day, which is what clued me in to the fact they were all concealing something from me. Esme was constantly reciting poetry, Carlisle was boring me into oblivion with medical journal articles, Emmett thought about nothing but the fantasy football pool he had joined at school and Rosalie was avoiding me at all costs. Actually, Rosalie was the only one acting normal.

"Carlisle," I called to my father as I walked up the steps to our current home.

"In the study, son," he said.

I walked into the house, not bothering to listen in on my siblings' thoughts. I bypassed the living room where Emmett and Jasper were battling it out on Guitar Hero. I stalked past Rosalie in the hallway as she sang Justin Bieber songs in Japanese.

_Really, Rose? _ I thought to myself.

It would be better if they had just admitted there was something they didn't want me to know. I may not have liked it, I probably would have been pissed off, but at least I could have just blocked them out on my own. Instead, they had my curiosity piqued to an immensely frustrating level.

"What can I do for you, Edward?" Carlisle asked me when I walked into his study.

"I want you to tell me what the hell is going on around here," I stated.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I mean," I said, getting more annoyed by the second, "I want you to tell me what the hell is going on around here. Alice is gone, and no one will tell me where she is. Jasper isn't thinking about her, and everyone is blocking me. I'm not usually all that interested in what's going on in everyone's head, but lately...something is up, and I am asking you to tell me what it is."

Carlisle sighed, and placed his book on the desk in front of him. "Trust me, son," he said, "it really is better you don't know where Alice has gone."

"Really?" I asked, sarcastically. "Because I'm thinking if everyone is so hell bent on me _not _knowing, then I probably ought to know!"

"Edward," Carlisle said. "I trust Alice will tell you what you need to know, when she returns."

"Dad," I pleaded. "Please."

"Fine," he sighed, "but you didn't hear it from me."

"Goddamn it, Edward!" Jasper cried as I tackled him in the living room. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"How could you let her go, Jasper?" I roared. "What were you thinking?" I pinned Jasper to the floor and held him down by his shoulders.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Jasper asked me, holding his hands up in surrender and attempting to look innocent.

I laughed, "Seriously, Jasper?" He was running through the lyrics to some Hank Williams song in his head. "Stop with the country and western bit and tell me why in God's name you let Alice go after..._her!" _The 'her' came out as a growl. It hurt too much to say _her _name out loud, and I didn't allow the others to say it either.

"Uh-oh!" I heard Emmett chuckle behind me. "Cat's out of the bag, Jazzy!"

"Shut up, Emmett!" Jasper and I both yelled.

Rosalie chose that moment to walk into the room. "What's with the guy on guy action?" she asked Emmett.

"Edward found out where Alice is," Emmett laughed.

"Oh, for Christ's sake!" Rosalie huffed. "Which one of you idiots spilled the beans?"

"It wasn't me," Emmett said quickly.

I let go of Jasper and turned on Rosalie. "How could you let her go?" I asked. "You, of all people, Rose."

"Listen, Mister Tall, Dark and Broody," Rosalie pointed her finger at me. "I tried to tell Alice not to go. Ask Jasper! I told her you wouldn't want her to go! I told her you'd be pissed off!"

"Jasper," I said, turning to my brother, "what did she see?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Jasper said.

"What. Did. She. See?"

Jasper sighed in defeat. "I swear, Edward," he said. "I don't know. She didn't tell me. All she said was that she had seen Bel – um - _her _in a vision and she had to go."

Suddenly, all the rage I felt at my family for keeping such an enormous secret from me ebbed away, and a serene sense of calm flooded my body.

"Stop it!" I growled at Jasper. "I don't need you to calm me down! I just want someone to be honest with me! Why? Why after all these years...I promised her...,"

The thought that my sister had gone to Bella, had disrupted whatever life she had made for herself, was more than I could bear. I hoped against hope that Alice was only watching from a distance, and Bella hadn't seen her. However, I knew Alice too well. If she saw Bella, then Bella would see her. Alice loved Bella too much to just stand in the background and watch. I had gone to such lengths to make sure we were far away so Bella couldn't find us. I didn't care that my dead heart shattered into a million pieces when I left her in the woods, I knew without me she would have the life she was supposed to have- a happy, human life.

Being with Bella had made me feel alive for the first time since I had become a vampire. She brought meaning and promise to my very existence. Her love made me believe again. I had spent the better part of a century alone, watching those around me find their one true match, their soul mate. Why, I had wondered often, wasn't that on the cards for me? For all too short a time, I had what the rest of my family had- a love that consumed me and made me whole again. I realized, though, that loving Bella meant putting her in constant danger. James had nearly killed her, and Victoria would be on the hunt for her as long as we were together. On her birthday, when Jasper lost control, I knew there was no way for her to survive in my world.

Alice insisted she had foreseen a future where Bella was like us. Bella told me she dreamed of spending eternity with me. I wanted nothing less in return. However, I couldn't get past the idea that being with her forever would mean taking her life, her soul. Bella didn't understand. She saw my life and my immortality as a gift, a blessing, something she thought she wanted. I saw it as damnation, a curse. I thought taking Bella's life to keep her with me was selfish.

I thought back to the day I left her in the woods behind her house in Forks. She'd looked so scared when I told her we were leaving. Then when she realized she wasn't coming with me, she was so broken. She believed me when I said I didn't want her, and for that I was almost grateful. If she was willing to believe I had never truly loved her, then maybe, just maybe, she would go on to live a long, natural, _safe_ life.

Over the past five years, I fought the urge to find her, check up on her. But I knew if I saw her again, the shattered remnants of my heart would fuse together, and the lies I had told her would eat me up until I spoke to her.

And if I spoke to her, I would have to tell her I had lied. If there was any chance she would believe me and take me back, I would do whatever she asked of me. That was a risk I wasn't willing to take.

I looked around the living room to find Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper staring at me.

"What?" I asked.

"Dude," Emmett said, "you totally zoned out there."

I shot a glare at Jasper, figuring he was responsible for the calm that allowed me my reminiscence. Jasper smiled and shrugged his shoulders.

"Sorry," I said, shaking my head. "Jasper, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have...,"

"It's okay," he said. "I understand. I wish I could have stopped Alice, but you know how she is when she gets an idea in her head. Plus, you know how she feels about _her._"

"I do," I said. "I just wish I knew why. Why now? What did she see and why did she see it?" The thought that Alice might have been watching Bella for all these years was enough to send me into another tantrum.

"She wasn't looking," Jasper said. "I promise you, Edward, she wasn't looking. I think that's part of it. The vision...it just came to her, and it frightened her."

"Have you spoken to her?" I asked. "Did Alice find her?" Jasper didn't answer. "Jasper?" I asked again.

"She called me two days ago," he admitted. "She found her. Bella went to Forks because...Charlie died."

It felt like I had been punched in the chest. Charlie was dead? Bella must have been beside herself with grief. The ache in my cold heart grew, and I wanted nothing more, in that moment, than to run all the way across the country to Forks and comfort her.

"There's more," Jasper said quietly. "But I promised Alice I wouldn't – well - I really think it's best if she tells you the rest herself. She should be home tomorrow."

"Is she..." I didn't want to ask, but I had to know, "with someone, Jasper?" While I told myself and everyone around me Bella should move on, the idea of her with another man sickened me.

_Someone else's hand in hers. Someone else's lips pressed to her mouth. Her falling asleep on the shoulder of another man, who could be with her in ways I had desperately wanted to be, but hadn't for fear of hurting her._

Jealous fury rose in my chest, and venom inundated my throat. A growl erupted from my clenched teeth, and Jasper laid his hand on my shoulder.

"No," Jasper said quickly, shaking his head, "it's nothing like that. It's just...I really shouldn't have said anything. Alice will explain when she gets home."

Without a word to any of them, I walked out of the house and ran into the woods. When I felt I was far enough away, I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed my little sister.

One ring...two...three...four...five...voicemail.

_Damn it, Alice!_

I redialed; voicemail again. I dialed, got her voicemail and dialed again; twenty-seven times. She had to have seen I was going to call and that I wasn't going to stop until she answered. I was about to try for twenty-eight, but my phone beeped with a text message.

_Jeez, Edward! I'm kinda busy. What's up?_

I typed so fast, I nearly broke the keys on my phone.

_I know where you are. Call me. NOW!_

I waited all of four-point-two seconds for my phone to ring.

"Leave her alone," I growled into the phone.

"Well, hello to you, too," Alice said.

"Don't start with me, Alice!" I said. "I can't believe you would do something like this! Come home!"

"Calm down," Alice said. "I'll be home tomorrow night."

"Now!" I said forcefully.

"Listen," she said. "I can't really talk right now. I'm kind of in the middle of something."

Realization dawned on me, and for the first time in a long time, I thought her name. The one word I had disallowed myself to think of.

_Alice was with Bella._

Like a rush of wind, all the fight in me died, a singular thought in my head.

_Alice was with Bella._

I could imagine her long chestnut colored hair, her big chocolate brown eyes, her cheeks flushed with color.

_Alice was with Bella._

Did she know Alice was talking to me? Did she realize that, even though I was across the country, we were closer to one another than we had been in five years? Did she even care?

"Hello?" Alice asked, a slight chuckle in her voice.

"What? Oh," I stuttered. "You're...busy?" I asked. "You're not...alone?"

"And Rosalie says you're not as smart as you think you are," Alice laughed again.

"Alice," I asked slowly, "are you...with..._her_? Is she...there?" All of my instincts told me Bella would be standing near to Alice, and I desperately wanted to beg my sister to stand even closer to her. If Bella would just say something to Alice, I would be able to hear her, and I would know by the sound of her voice if she was alright or not.

"Yes," Alice said matter-of-factly. "Now, I really do have to go. I'll see you tomorrow night, brother."

Alice ended the call, and I knew calling her back would only result in my having to listen to her voicemail greeting again. She would surely turn her phone off. I ran back to the house, up the stairs and into my bedroom. I locked the door as a warning to any member of my family who might think about coming in, and lay down in the middle of the floor, silently willing the next thirty-six hours to pass.

**End Notes: Edward, Edward, Edward...are you feeling sorry for him? I want to, but my friend G keeps begging me to make y'all angry at him...What do you think? :)**


	7. Chapter 7 Anger

**A/N: First off- a HUGE thank you to all of you who have put this on your faves and alerts! It makes me so happy to know y'all are getting into this story! And your reviews make me want to jump up and down like a little girl! :)**

**I know lots of you are eager to find out the details of Bella's change- the who, where, when and why- and you'll get the teensiest tidbit in this chapter as to how it began, but not much! You'll have to stick with me a little longer for the whole story! It's coming, just be patient! :)**

**As usual, Claire Bloom positively rocks my world! And if you haven't checked out her stuff, you totally should! Her fic, Enigma, is beyond awesome!**

**SM still owns Twilight...this is just for kicks...**

**CHAPTER SEVEN - Anger**

"**...and who cares if you disagree, you are not me**

**who made you king of anything?"**

_**King of Anything, Sara Bareilles**_

**Alice**

I ended the call with Edward and turned back to Bella.

"Sorry about that," I said, turning the phone off, and slipping it into my repaired messenger bag.

"It's okay," Bella said. "He sounded...angry."

"I'm sorry you had to hear it," I said. "Although, I do wish I could have seen his face, especially when he realized I couldn't talk because I was with you," I laughed. I probably shouldn't have said that, but it was true. I could just imagine the way Edward's eyebrows would scrunch up, and his nostrils would flare. He was most likely in the woods behind the house, pacing and fisting that mop of hair in his hands. I couldn't help it, it was funny to me.

Bella was pacing in front of me, too. And she was twisting the ends of her own hair, her eyes closed, muttering under her breath. The similarity wasn't lost on me. I laughed quietly, wondering how two people so obviously alike, so meant to be together, could have ended up in such a fucked up situation. And it was a truly fucked up situation. To think Edward had dragged our entire family out of town, in the middle of the night, changed our email addresses and phone numbers, demanded we stay away from her, all so she could be safe from our world, only to have her end up in it anyway. Well, it was astoundingly laughable.

Edward would go completely mental when he found out. He would be angry at whoever changed Bella, certainly. He would be even more enraged if it turned out she had chosen to be changed. Of course, what would infuriate him the most, if that turned out to be the case, would be that he wasn't the one to change her. For all his bitching and moaning about taking her life and damning her soul, deep down Edward wanted Bella for eternity, just as much as she wanted him. Eventually, if he hadn't been so bent on his idea of saving her, he would have realized it was what she truly wanted and given in.

I wanted to be around when Edward saw the new Bella for the first time. For all the anger he might feel, his universe was going to shift dramatically when she finally stood in front of him again. If he thought she was beautiful before - well, I had a feeling Jasper would need to suppress Edward's repressed, male desires.

"Bella," I said. She didn't respond, she just kept pacing and twisting her hair. "Bella," I said again, a little louder; still nothing. "Bella!" I yelled, causing the surrounding trees to shudder with the force of my voice.

Bella stopped pacing and spun around to face me. "Why is he so angry with you?" she asked. "Why should he care whether you're with me, or not, I think he made it pretty clear he's not interested in me or what I do with my life. He gave up the right to any opinion about my life when he left me in the God damn woods!"

"He's just..." I tried to explain, but she didn't even notice I'd said anything. Pissed off Bella was back.

"You're not good for me, Bella! You don't belong with me, Bella! I don't want you, Bella!" she mocked. "A vampire's memory is impeccable. I know he remembers saying those things to me! Who does he think he is, being all high and mighty? It's been five fucking years, and he was right! He made good on his promise! It was like you never existed. You all just up, and disappeared, and I had no way of finding you! I spent months devising plans and schemes! I thought of everything and anyone who might be able to give me some kind of information! I was on my way to Alaska to find the Denalis when..."

Bella took a deep breath and stared at me. "He _made_ you leave, didn't he, the repressed control freak? _He_ decided! Because _he _didn't really love me! But you did! You still do, don't you?" She looked at me with pleading, desperate eyes. "I love you, Alice," she said. "I was angry at you, at all of you, but I love you just the same."

She sat down on a fallen tree trunk, and hung her head to rest in her hands. "I'm sorry," she whispered, "about the other day. I shouldn't have come at you like that."

When I was fairly certain she was finished, drained from all the rage she had let loose, I walked over and sat beside her. I wrapped my arm around her shoulder, and hugged her to me.

"He did decide," I said, "for all of us. I didn't want to go, Bella. You have to believe me. You were my best friend, my sister already. I loved you so much, and yes, I still do. We all do."

Bella and I sat on the tree trunk for the better part of an hour, her head on my shoulder. I wondered what she was thinking about. I hoped that Bella could find a way to forgive me and the rest of the family for abandoning her, to take us back somehow. If she could do that, maybe one day she would be able to listen to Edward, and forgive him as well.

The sun was beginning to dip below the horizon, and I knew if I was going to be home the next night, I needed to start running toward Seattle soon.

"Bella?" I said. She sat up and looked at me. "Come home with me."

She laid her head back on my shoulder and sighed, "I wish I could, Alice."

"You can," I said. "You can come with me and when we get there, I'll let you beat the shit out of Edward, just for kicks," I laughed, nudging her shoulder with mine.

"I don't want to see him," she said. I knew if she had tears, she would have been crying all over me.

"Yes, you do," I said. "Besides, he needs to know about you. I think this piece of information would be best revealed in person. And there are things you need to know, too, that only he can tell you. Come on," I urged her, "everyone would be so happy to see you!"

"No," she said flatly. "I can't, Alice. I just can't. Please understand."

"I don't," I said, pushing her head up, and turning to face her. "I know you're angry at us for leaving you. I know you have a story to tell, even though you're not ready to tell it yet. I know you've been alone in this life for five years. I know what that's like. Bella, if you'll just come with me, we could be...a family again, like we were always supposed to be."

"I love you, Alice," Bella said, "but my family is lying in the Forks Cemetery."

I knew nothing I said was going to change her mind. She hadn't enough time to process I had actually found her, and she was still so angry at my idiot brother. I reached into my bag and pulled out a scrap of paper and a pen, writing our address in Vermont on it.

"Here," I said, handing her the paper, "just in case you change your mind."

"You have to go now?" Bella asked as she took the piece of paper and slipped it into her pocket.

"I do," I said. "I promised Jasper I would be home by tomorrow night. I'm running to Seattle and catching a flight back."

"Oh, fuck!" Bella gasped. "Alice! I almost forgot!"

"What?" I asked, worried about the change in her voice.

"I saw an old friend yesterday. Do you remember Jacob Black?"

I could feel my eyes widen at her question. I didn't know Jacob, but I knew his tribe. Carlisle had been careful to explain to us the relationship he had forged with the Quileutes.

"I don't know him," I said, "but I know who he is. I know about the Quileutes."

"You know?" Bella asked.

"Know what they really are?" I asked. "Yeah, Carlisle knew..."

"Why didn't anyone tell me?" Bella interrupted. "What? You thought I could handle vampires being real, but not American Indians who turn into giant wolves, whenever said vampires are nearby?" Bella was smiling so I knew she wasn't really angry.

I shrugged my shoulders, "It never came up, I guess."

"We'll get back to that in a minute," she said. "They started phasing when your family moved back here. Jacob found me at your house yesterday," Bella explained. "The pack, they knew there was a vampire in the area, and their leader Sam sent Jacob to check out your old place. But, Alice, you have to be careful! Jacob burned my jacket to make the others believe he'd killed me, but he said if they found you..."

"They can't touch me," I said confidently.

"Alice," Bella said seriously, "have you ever seen these wolves? If the rest of them look like Jacob, they're all _enormous_! You're maybe five feet tall! If they catch up to you, they'll rip you to shreds!"

"Bella, Bella, Bella," I laughed. "First of all, I would know they were coming," I tapped my temple for emphasis, "and second of all, even if they caught up to me, they still can't touch me. Carlisle made a deal, a treaty of sorts, back in the early nineteen hundreds."

"Explain," she said.

"We don't bite humans, and they don't kill us," I said.

"But, Alice," Bella insisted, "what if they don't give you the chance to talk before they rip your head off?"

"Like I said, I'll know they're coming," I reminded her. "I'll just stand there waiting, facing them, so they can see my eyes. Then I'll tell them who I am, and they will have no choice but to let me on my way. Trust me, Bella. There is nothing to worry about here."

Bella tried to come up with a retort, but seeing as there was none, she sighed and let it go. "Okay," she said. "If you're sure,"

"I'm sure," I said. "And I really do need to get going."

"Be careful," she said.

"I will," I promised. "You'll think about my offer?"

Bella sighed and nodded her head. "I will."

I opened my arms and looked at her with pleading eyes. Bella smiled and reached out, grabbing me and pulling me into a hug.

"I missed you so much," she whispered.

"Me, too," I said.

"Can I call you?" she asked.

"You better!" I laughed, pulling out of her embrace.

"Wait," Bella said, "that reminds me! What was with all the text messages earlier asking me where I was, and if I was okay?"

"Oh," I replied. "Well, I was looking for you, for your decision about talking to me again. Only I couldn't find you anywhere. It was like you just disappeared. It was weird, and I didn't like it."

"Hmm," she said. "That does seem strange. I wonder why."

"Maybe I'm just out of practice when it comes to you," I said, giving her the only explanation I had come up with.

"Maybe so," she said.

I reached out and pulled her into another quick hug. "I'm sorry about Charlie," I said.

"He always liked you," she smiled. "Tell Jasper I said hello?"

"Of course," I said. "Any other messages you'd like for me to pass along?" I asked, quirking an eyebrow at her and smiling.

"No," she said, glaring at me.

"Okay, then, I'd better get going." I picked my messenger bag up off the tree trunk, and slung it across my body. "We'll talk soon, Bella," I said.

Bella gave me a smile and a wave before I turned and ran deep into the forest.

**End Notes: Before you all go nuts over the fact that Alice thinks she can see the wolves, remember...this is AU New Moon...she hasn't encountered the wolves yet so she doesn't know about the blind spot they create. She'll find out soon, I promise! Now, hit that pretty little button and review! :)**


	8. Chapter 8 Torn

**A/N: I want to again thank all of you who read this, have it on alert, and especially those of you who continuously review! KD, dorano, simaril - y'all are so sweet! :)**

**As per usual, my RL girls, L & G, thanks for the hours of bouncing around ideas, even when we get out of control and come up with crazy plot scenarios! So happy to have your support!**

**My Super Fabulous, Wonder Woman Beta, Claire- I adore you, babe! xx**

**Stephenie Meyer owns, I just play... and thank her for letting us do it! :)**

**CHAPTER EIGHT - Torn**

"**I'm just a little bit caught in the middle**

**Life is a maze and love is a riddle**

**Can't do it alone, I've tried**

**And I don't know why..."**

_**The Show, Lenka**_

**Bella**

Alice had been gone barely a minute when the crushing feeling in my chest began. I tried to run, but my feet would hardly move. I jerked my head in every direction, searching for a sign she was still close by. I wanted to scream, beg for her to come back. I had walked a half-mile deeper into the trees when I sank to my knees. The underbrush of the forest floor was soft, and I lay back staring helplessly at the darkened canopy. The scene felt all too familiar, and again, my lack of composure irritated me.

_You're a vampire, for Christ's sake, not a defenseless human! She can't sneak away this time! Go! Catch her!_

I wanted to stay with Alice, whether I travelled with her or she remained in Forks. I had missed her the most, aside from _Him._ I wished I could go with her, see the others, but I couldn't because _He _would be there, and I was nowhere near ready for that particular reunion.

_Are you even listening to yourself right now? _

I tried to figure out when my human emotions had begun to take up such prominent space in my psyche. I thought back to the first irrefutable memory I had - the night I had woken up as a vampire.

The circumstances surrounding my change were traumatic, and I awoke scared and alone. After the first, frenzied hours, I fully grasped my new reality, and I vowed I would embrace the symbolism of my cold heart. Never again would I allow mortal emotions to get the better of me. After all, being led by such emotions had been the very thing which had precipitated my transformation. I refused to be a monster, I wouldn't feed on humans, but I wasn't going to live under the pretense that I still was one.

For five years, I had been successful at keeping my distance from humanity. I fed on animals which kept my contact with them to a minimum. I assumed if I wasn't living amongst them, trying to blend in, I could stay removed from their sentimental ways. Sometimes, I came across other vampires with whom I would travel just to have company for a while. Eventually, though, the questions regarding my diet would grow tiresome, and I would leave to be on my own again.

I supposed my downfall had begun when I started using my laptop to check up on my parents. I can't say why, I simply felt the need to make sure they were safe and sound. I easily learned how to hack into Renee's email account, and would read her lengthy messages to my father. On a weekly basis, she begged him to do more to find me. His reply was always the same; he was using all his resources. But I was an adult, and when I was ready to come home, I would. I knew Charlie was just telling my mother what she needed to hear. He knew I was never coming home.

If I had realized where keeping tabs on Charlie and Renee would lead, I wouldn't have done it. If I had never read the damn Forks newspaper to see what was happening with Charlie's latest case, I wouldn't have known what had happened to him, and I would never have found myself lying once again on the forest floor, feeling like a hole had been punched through my marble chest.

"Bells?"

Jacob's voice rang loudly in my ears, as did his use of a nickname I hadn't heard in half a decade. I opened my eyes and sat up on my hands.

"Why is it every time I go looking for you, you're lying alone in the woods at night?" he asked.

"Very funny," I said.

"No, I mean it," Jacob laughed. "What? Is this like some kind of ritual or something?"

"What do you want, Jake?" I asked, annoyed with him for being right.

"Like I said, I was looking for you. I wanted to know if Alice had left Forks yet. Paul told Sam he sniffed out another vamp while he was in town," Jacob said.

"She's headed to Seattle," I told him. "Besides, Alice said your pack can't hurt her anyway, something about a treaty. You failed to mention that," I said.

"Oh, well, yeah..." Jacob stammered. "Sorry."

"Whatever," I said. "It doesn't matter now. She's gone." I was attempting to conceal the melancholy in my voice, but Jacob wasn't buying it.

"You know," he said, sitting on a nearby tree trunk, "for a creature who is supposed to have a heart of stone, you sure are attached to the, um, to them." I eyed him curiously. "I'm just saying," he continued, "you seem to be very...I don't know, emotional maybe, about her being here and all, and now that she's gone again, here you are." Jacob swept his hand across the air, indicating my position on the ground.

"Apparently," I scoffed, standing up and brushing off my jeans, "I'm a defective vampire. Instead of waking up with a super cool power, or even just the run of the mill lack of conscience, I got saddled with residual human feelings."

"Ah, that's not so bad," Jacob smiled.

"Ha!" I laughed. "It's not working out so well for me right about now. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, though. I wasn't a spectacular human so why should I have expected to be special as a vampire?"

Jacob stared at me, his black eyes staring into my amber ones. "You listen to me, Bella Swan," he said, standing up and towering over me, "you were an extraordinary girl, and if there is such a thing as an extraordinary vampire, I'm sure you're her. Maybe this residual human feelings thing _is _your super cool power. Have you ever thought of that?"

Inside of myself, I could feel the battle between instinct and emotion welling up. My vampire nature was telling me the man in front of me wasn't simply a man, but my enemy, and he would say whatever he needed to say to get me in a docile position. The venom coursing through my veins was prickling, ready for a fight. The warmth of feeling in my chest, however, was on a crusade to remind me this man was my friend, and despite his own true nature, he was standing there telling me I was extraordinary. True to my unorthodox vampire personality, emotion won out.

"How do you do that?" I asked, backing away slightly. "How do you always know what to say? You did the same thing the last time..." I could _feel _rather than honestly remember Jacob being there for me when _He'd _left.

"You never did see yourself the way everyone else saw you," he said softly, gazing at me with misty eyes.

A lump caught in my throat. How many times had _He _told me I didn't see myself clearly? Why had I been so quick to believe it coming from Jacob, both then and now? And why, I wondered for the millionth time, were my memories vague and uncertain unless they pertained to one of these men?

"I don't know what to do," I said. "Alice asked me to go home with her, and part of me wants to go."

"You haven't been with them at all, these last few years?" Jacob asked.

"I haven't seen them since the last time you found me in these woods," I said. "Not until Alice found me a couple of days ago at the cemetery."

"Huh," Jacob said. "I figured when I saw you..."

"I told you it wasn't them," I reminded him.

"But, you haven't seen them in five years?"

"No, not once,"

"And now she's left you again, and you feel..."

I felt, as I had after the first time a Cullen had left me in Forks, like Jacob was playing Dr. Phil, leading me to answers I already had. "I _feel _like I want to catch up to her and tell her I'll go."

Jacob raised his eyebrows at me. "Well, then, what are you waiting for? How far away could she be by now?"

"Maybe a hundred miles," I said.

"Go," he said.

"Go?"

"Yes," he said. "Don't be stubborn, Bella. You want to go, so go."

Jacob was right, I was being stubborn. I longed to go with Alice. I yearned to see Carlisle and Esme again, to embrace Jasper and arm wrestle with Emmett. Hell, I even wanted to see Rosalie again. Why was I still standing here? Was it because I wanted to prove a point? Would I stay behind so _He _wouldn't think I wasn't crawling back, begging him to reconsider, at the first opportunity?

_He _would never hear me beg him to feel something for me again.

Different parts of me always had different explanations as to why he didn't love me. I thought hesaw me as a liability; if anything had happened to me in this world, his family would surely take the fall. Part of me felt like he didn't love me because he realized I wasn't enough- pretty enough, smart enough, strong enough. Most of me thought he didn't love me because he simply didn't.

I wanted him to see me now, to know what the fragile girl he tossed aside had become. The irony of my fate didn't escape me; I knew my transformation was the outcome he desired least. In some small corner of my mind, I wanted to go with Alice just to see the look on his face when he realized we were finally equals.

My mind made up, I turned to Jacob and smiled.

"Race you to Seattle?" I asked. I hoped I would catch Alice before she got on the plane, but if I couldn't, I didn't want to be alone again.

Jacob smirked, "Bet I can catch up to her first."

"You're on," I laughed and took off into the trees. I leapt over fallen logs and bounded over the river. From behind me, I heard Jacob growling that I hadn't played fair. I clicked my tongue over my shoulder, "Come on, boy!"

The air around me swirled with magic as Jacob phased. His paws padded heavily on the soft earth as he gained on me. Having no idea how fast he was in wolf form, I tucked my head and barreled through the forest, the greenery passing by me in a blur. Alice's scent was still distinct in the air, and I knew we were on the right track.

For several miles, Jacob and I played cat and mouse, him bumping into me as he passed and me leaping over his head to take the lead again. I laughed, for the first time in years, and the levity of my own voice brought warmth to my chest, which I welcomed. Jacob gained on me again and tackled me to the ground, lapping his tongue over my cheek as he rolled off me.

"Eww!" I cried, wiping at my face with my sleeve.

I turned to see Jacob sitting back on his haunches, his nose in the air. He had his eyes closed and looked as though he were concentrating - or tracking something.

"What?" I asked.

I was sure we were still on Alice's trail, but I inhaled deeply, gagging as I was pummeled by the stench of wolf. The odor was strong, and more than that of the lone wolf sitting in front of me.

"The others?" I whispered.

Jacob opened his eyes and furrowed his thick, black eyebrows at me. Slowly, he nodded to his right.

"Where? How far?" I asked. The stink was so strong, it was hard for me to judge direction or distance.

Before he could answer, a blood curdling scream rang out, jettisoning birds out of their nests and sending small wildlife scurrying for cover.

"Alice!" I gasped.

Jacob bolted in the direction he had indicated, and I was fast on his heels. Alice screamed again, and as fast as I was, I feared we wouldn't make it to her in time. The canine scent grew stronger, almost masking Alice's scent from even me. Jacob was galloping with determination towards a clearing up ahead. Through the trees, I could make out four large beasts circling around a central location. I saw, smelled and heard Alice all at once.

"Listen to me, you dogs!" she screamed. I was shocked to hear her gasping for breath. "You have no right! I am a Cullen, God damn it! Leave me alone!"

Growls, resonating like laughter, permeated the air, and the beasts drew closer. The pack was concentrating on Alice and didn't take notice of Jacob, or me, coming out of the woods. Running quick as lightning, I made it to the opposite side of the circle, just as Jacob burst through the tree line, and I swooped in to grab Alice. I had her in my arms, back under the cover of the forest before they even realized she was gone. The four of them turned simultaneously to Jacob, who growled at them.

The biggest one, black and standing shoulders above the others, stepped forward first, swiping at the russet wolf, then, as if in slow motion, all five of them stared from one to the other, eventually all their eyes settling on Jacob. It appeared they were having a silent conversation.

"What are they doing?" Alice whispered to me.

"Talking," I whispered back. "They can read each other's thoughts when they've phased. Are you okay?"

"I think so," she said. "The little gray one scratched me and the big brown one bit me, though."

"He bit you?" I cried. "Where?"

"Here," she said, pulling at the hem of her skirt to reveal an enormous bite mark on her left thigh. "I think he managed to break the skin, too," she said, "it hurts like hell!"

"What happened?" I asked. I was keeping one eye on Alice and another on the strange conversation taking place in the clearing.

"I'm not sure," she said. "I should have seen them coming. I don't understand."

Jacob was taking a swing at the big black wolf, who I assumed must be Sam, and the other, smaller ones were backing away. I tore my eyes from the fight and rested them on Alice's face. She looked odd; her eyes appeared to be losing focus.

"We need to get away from here," I said. "Can you walk?"

"Of course," Alice said.

I stood first, reaching my hand down to her. Alice got to her feet and brushed grass and leaves from her skirt. I was watching the wolves again, trying to figure out what was going on. Sam and Jacob looked to be in some kind of standoff, with the others clearly coming to Sam's defense.

"Bella," Alice said.

"Hang on," I whispered. "I think Jacob might need a hand."

"Bella," she said again, grabbing at my arm.

"Okay," I said, turning just in time to see Alice's hand fall from my sleeve as her small body pitched forward, and she fell to the ground.

**End Notes: dun, dun, dun... heehee **

**What the heck is wrong with Alice? What's up with the wolves attacking? Stay tuned, dear readers, and you shall see! :)**

**On a last note: If you don't know about the FanFicAholics Anon group on FB, I must wonder what rock you're living under. However, if you're not a part, go to FB right this second! It's an amazing place to hang out! Plus, we're having this awesome contest that you need to check out! The FFN page is http:/www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/u/2446549/Fanficaholics_Anon **

**Go read these amazing one-shots, you'll be able to vote for your fave SOON! :)**


	9. Chapter 9 Questions

**A/N: Thanks to all my new followers, y'all make my day every time that email comes in! :)**

**Claire, you rock my world, babe! xx**

**The lovely and talented Skychaser has allowed me the honor of being her Beta, and for that, my dear, I am so freaking happy! Her story, Remember Me Tomorrow is ah-ma-zing! Full of mystery and heartache and oh, so good! Check it out at www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/63934281/1/Remember_Me_Tomorrow You'll be so glad you did! :)**

**As always, SM owns all things Twilight. Trust me when I say, I make nothing...**

**CHAPTER NINE - Questions**

"_**There's more than one answer to these questions, **_

_**pointing me in a crooked line..."**_

_**Closer to Fine, Indigo Girls**_

**Bella**

"Alice!" I cried, grabbing her by the arm and pulling her tiny form back to standing. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

Alice rubbed her temples and shook her head slightly. "I don't know," she said, "but I feel...a little weird."

"You are a little weird," Jacob said from behind me.

"Jacob," I sighed, wanting to laugh but keeping the giggle at bay.

"Sorry," he said, "she Okay?"

"No!" Alice yelped. Holding onto my arm with one hand, she pointed at Jacob with the other, "I am _not _okay! One of your mutt brothers _bit _me, thank you very much!"

"Yeah," Jacob said, "about that,"

Alice started in on Jacob again before he could finish, "They had no right to attack me like that! I was minding my own business, on _my _side of the treaty line, I might add! The four of them came rushing at me from all sides, all growling and slobbering everywhere! It was gross! And then, _then, _they jumped me like some kind of back alley criminal! They wouldn't even listen when I told them who I was!" Alice huffed when she was finished, and I noticed she was still holding tightly to me.

"Why is that, Jacob?" I asked, placing my hand over Alice's. "Shouldn't they have stopped when they learned who Alice is? I mean, isn't that the whole point of the treaty?"

Jacob shrugged, his bare muscles flexing as his shoulders rose and fell. "That's what I asked them," he said. "Paul said they didn't know who she was, that it's my fault for not telling them."

"Why wouldn't you tell them?" I asked, getting angry at Jacob for keeping the detail of Alice's identity to himself.

"I did!" Jacob defended himself. "I told Sam as soon as I got back to La Push, after you told me she was here. I told him I had been the one to see her, and recognized her as one of the...as one of them."

I believed him, and was grateful he had not spoken their name aloud. I was also screaming mad at Sam for allowing the pack to ambush Alice when he knew all along they were going against the treaty. Looking over Jacob's shoulder, I could see the others, still in wolf form, huddled together in the clearing. The smallest one, grey and streaked with white, was looking in our direction.

"What are they doing over there, anyway?" I asked.

"Probably plotting ways to finish me off," Alice scoffed.

"Actually," Jacob said, "they're discussing how to deal with me."

Realization dawned on me, and suddenly, I feared for Jacob's well-being.

"Because of me?" I asked. Jacob nodded. "They recognize my scent is the one from your fire, right?" He nodded again. "What will they do to you? What _can _they do to you?"

"Remind me why we care?" Alice asked, pulling on my sleeve as she backed away and sat on a nearby trunk.

"We care," I glared at her, "because Jacob has saved my life - twice."

"Oh," she said, "well...okay...go on..." she waved her tiny hand in the air.

"It doesn't matter," Jacob said. "They really can't do anything, to me, or either of you. They can't touch Alice, and you're with her, Bella, so you're kind of under her protection."

"How do they know I'm not some crazed, bloodthirsty psychopath?" I asked sarcastically.

"Your eyes, dummy," Jacob laughed. "They can see your eyes. They aren't happy about it, especially Sam, but the treaty binds them."

"Oh," I said. "Well, then why are they still over there?"

Jacob turned to the clearing and yelled, "Would you assholes leave already?"

The group turned at the sound of Jacob's booming voice. The smaller three plodded off towards the trees, leaving Sam behind. He lowered his head, his slick, black fur glinting in the moonlight, and bared his sharp teeth in our direction.

"I mean it, Sam," Jacob said, sounding rather authoritative and leaning forward on the balls of his feet. "Don't make me...I don't want to..." the words barely made it out through Jacob's clenched jaw.

Sam growled, deep and menacing, before backing slowly away.

When all four wolves were out of sight and the animal stench had lessened, Jacob relaxed, and I asked, "What the hell was _that _about?"

"Nothing," Jacob said curtly, turning back to me and Alice. "I really think you two ought to get going, though."

"Me, too," Alice said from her perch. "I feel strange, and I'd like to go home."

"Strange?" I asked, walking over to kneel in front of her. "Alice, vampires don't feel _strange_. Can you elaborate a little, please?"

"I don't know," she said. "My balance feels...off...I can hardly smell him at all," she pointed her head towards Jacob, "and my eyes kind of...Okay, look out into the clearing, Bella. What do you see?"

I sighed, a little exasperated at this woman, who was usually not without words, for suddenly being unable to find any to describe how she was feeling. "I see..." I scanned the open space, lit only by the cloud-splotched moon overhead, "...grass, fallen trees, rocks in the ground...there's a tiny patch of wildflowers on the opposite side, and I believe there's a quarter under that log over there."

"Do you want to know what I can see?" Alice asked. I turned to look at her and raised my eyebrows in response. "I see the big stuff, like the trees and the expanse of grass, but the rest of it is hidden in shadow, darkness."

How could it be that Alice wasn't able to see the clearing in perfect detail? Darkness and shadows were no hindrance to vampire sight. Every feature of our surroundings was obvious to me, as it should have been to her.

"That doesn't make any sense," I said.

Alice was rubbing her head again. "I know," she said. "Just like how my not being able to see them coming doesn't make any sense; I should have known, why didn't I know?"

"What is she talking about?" Jacob asked.

"She's having problems with her equilibrium, and her eyesight, it's not as clear as it ought to be. And I told you about Alice's gift," I said, "but she didn't see the pack coming for her. She should have known."

"Oh," Jacob shrugged. "That's interesting."

"_Interesting_?" Alice sneered. "Stumbling, my senses being off kilter and a hole in my visions are not _interesting_!"

"Calm down," I said to her. "It's okay. We'll figure it out."

"I feel out of control, like when I was looking for you earlier today, but I couldn't find you."

"I thought we decided that was about you being out of practice looking for me," I said.

"Yeah," she said, "but you were with him when I was looking, right? When I sent you all those texts, he was at the house?"

"Yes," I said, catching on to Alice's train of thought. "So, when I was with Jacob, you couldn't find me..." I led her.

"Which means," she said, her eyes growing wide, "I can't see _them_!"

"What are you two babbling about?" Jacob asked.

"You," I said. "Your pack, it seems to be a blind spot for her. She can't see you, can't predict where you are or what you're going to do."

"I don't understand," Alice said. "Nothing like this has ever happened to me before."

"We can ask Carlisle about it," I said. "But I don't think the blind spot has anything to do with what's happening to you physically."

"Me either," she said.

"Do you think it's because of the bite?" Jacob asked. When I looked to him, he nodded at Alice's leg and said, "She said one of them bit her, right?"

"Shit!" I cried. "He's right, Alice! You got bitten!"

"So?" she asked.

"So, maybe that's what has you feeling strange," I offered. "Maybe it's some kind of wolf defense. Their whole purpose for existing is to destroy vampires, so maybe their bite weakens us somehow."

"Maybe," she said.

"We'll ask Carlisle about that, too," I said.

"We?" Alice asked picking up on my second use of the word.

"Yes," I said. "I was trying to catch up to you when we found you here," I explained. "I'd like to take you up on your offer to go back with you, if that's still Okay."

"Okay?" Alice smiled. "It's fabulous, Bella!" She stood up from her seat and launched herself to hug me, but she tripped on a fallen branch and landed on her bottom back on the tree.

"What the fuck?" she cried. "Did I seriously just _trip _over a freaking branch?"

"Something is definitely wrong," I said. "We need to find out what's going on with you."

"Figure it out on the way to Seattle, please," Jacob said. "Just because the pack can't launch a direct attack, doesn't mean they won't try to goad you into a fight if you stay."

"Jake's right," I agreed, "we should get going."

Alice stood from the trunk, slowly and carefully, and looked at Jacob. "I don't like you," she said, "you're not very nice, you have no manners and you smell like a wet dog..." Jacob crossed his arms over his chest, and I gave Alice a disapproving look. "I'm not finished," she said to me before turning back to Jacob. "However, you have apparently saved Bella's life twice, and you helped her save me tonight, so...thank you." Alice offered up her tiny hand to Jacob.

"You're welcome," Jacob smiled, stepping over and extending his very large hand to her. "You believe that I told Sam who you are?"

"I do," Alice said, shaking his hand once before dropping it, "but mainly just because Bella does, and I trust her judgment."

"Whatever the reason," Jacob shrugged. "It's the truth."

"Bella, can we go now?" Alice asked.

"Sure," I said. "Can you give me a minute with Jake?"

Alice nodded, picked up her bag from the ground and walked away.

"So," Jacob said.

"So," I said in return.

"I guess this is goodbye...again," he smiled.

"For now, anyway," I said. "Thank you, for everything."

"Eh," he laughed, puffing up his chest, "saving you, it's what I do."

I punched him lightly on the shoulder, "I mean it, Jake."

He placed a hand on either of my shoulders and leaned in to kiss my forehead. The fact neither of us held our breath in such close contact intrigued me. Once again, we weren't Vampire and Wolf - mortal enemies, each bound by our nature to destroy the other- but Bella and Jacob - friends.

"Be careful, Bells," he whispered.

"I will," I answered.

"Call me if you ever come back to Forks?" he asked.

"Sure," I said. "Bye, Jake."

"See you later, Bells."

Alice and I were halfway to Seattle. The trip was taking longer than it should have, though, because Alice couldn't exactly run, at least not as fast as she should have been able to, and she wouldn't let me carry her. We walked mostly, careful of the thick bracken on the forest floor. Alice tripped over more branches and nearly walked into a tree at one point, causing her to slump to her knees and beat on the ground with her fists.

"This is fucking ridiculous!" she screamed.

I laughed. I couldn't help it. She looked like a five-year-old throwing a temper tantrum. Alice huffed and glared up at me.

"I'm sorry, Alice," I said, stifling another chuckle. "I know it isn't funny, but..."

"Bella," she said, worry in her voice.

"What?" I asked, kneeling to the ground beside her. "What's wrong?"

"Bella, I can't...it's too dark, and I can't...see you...at all..." Alice whispered.

"Not at all?" I asked. Alice hung her head and shook it slowly.

"Okay," I said firmly, standing up and pulling her with me, "we're going back to Forks, to your house, right now."

"What's wrong with me?" she asked, her voice sounding as small as she stood.

"I don't know, but we're not risking something weirder happening on an airplane," I said. "I'm going to pick you up and put you on my back, alright?"

"Alright," she agreed.

I lifted Alice up with ease and situated her on my back. "Hold on," I said, and when her grip tightened around my shoulders, I took off running.

We made it back to the house in fifteen minutes. I set Alice next to the one sofa I hadn't demolished, and told her to sit down.

"I'll be right back," I said.

Walking around the living room, I turned on every light I could find, illuminating the space around us.

"Can you see anything now?" I asked.

"I can tell you've turned the lights on, I can see shapes, but I can't make anything out definitively," she replied.

I came to stand close in front of her and asked. "What about now? Can you see me at all?"

"Like I said, I can see your form, though it's blurry. If I wasn't sure, or you weren't talking, I'm not positive I'd know it was you."

"Alright," I said, sitting on the floor. "Let's try this - I'm going to make a decision, tell me if you see it."

I thought about _Him_, and made a firm decision when I saw him again, I would punch him square in the jaw as hard as I could. I thought about how good it would feel now that I could do it without breaking my hand. I watched Alice concentrate, her eyes wide open and focused. She furrowed her brow and sighed.

"Well?" I asked.

"I can see you, I think," she said. "But it's fuzzy, and I can't tell...are you swinging a hammer?" she asked, turning her head towards the sound of my voice.

"Ha!" I laughed. "No, I decided to punch your brother!"

"Oh," Alice said, sounding defeated.

"Let's try something else," I suggested. "Look for Jasper. As close as you two are, surely you can see him clearly. He thinks you're on your way home to him, what does he want to do tomorrow?"

It was Alice's turn to giggle, "I don't think I need psychic powers to know the answer to that one."

"Ew! Alice!" I laughed with her. "Okay, so we can't exactly test your visions right now," I admitted.

"This sucks," she sighed, her laughter dying as she laid her head on the back of the sofa. "What are we supposed to do, just wait it out? Hope for the best? What if this shit is permanent? What kind of vampire goes blind and can't walk across a room without tripping?"

Reaching into Alice's bag at my feet, I retrieved her cell phone and flipped it open. I looked through her phone book for the entry I needed, my finger hovering over the number.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Nothing I want to do," I said flatly. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves, damn human emotions, and pressed the call button.

"Hello, Alice," his voice was even more beautiful than I remembered, soft and musical, dazzling even to me, even on the phone. I imagined him lost in his thoughts, working on something amazing, when he stopped to answer the phone.

"It's Bella," I corrected him quietly, knowing he would hear me no matter how softly I spoke.

"Bella," he said. Not a question or a statement, my name was a memory, breathed over the line with tenderness.

I took another deep breath, "I need your help..."

**End Notes: SO...who's she calling? Reviews are like Halloween candy, you can NEVER have too much! :)**


	10. Chapter 10 Pictures of You

**A/N: I know you all want to know who Bella called, so I won't keep you long here...**

**Claire Bloom rocks my world! You are the BEST Beta a girl could ever ask for, honey, and I simply adore you! :)**

**SM owns...and graciously allows freaks like us to mess with her creation! For that, I am eternally grateful! ;)**

**Now, read on ladies...  
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**CHAPTER TEN - Pictures of You**

"_**Pictures of you, pictures of me**_

_**Remind us all of what we could have been..."**_

_**Pictures of You, The Last Goodnight**_

**Carlisle**

"Jackie, do you have those charts ready?" I asked the nurse on duty.

"Yes, Doctor Cullen," she answered, "they're right here."

Jackie handed me a stack of metal binders with a smile, which I politely returned. Walking down the corridor towards my office, I flipped through the charts, making mental notes on the patients in my care. The ward was quiet, as it usually was this time of night, all the rooms' occupants asleep.

I entered my office and closed the door, walking to my desk and sitting in my leather chair. The furniture was slightly large for the space, but I had brought it along because it reminded me of being in my office in Forks. I missed working at the hospital there, treating the people who had accepted me and my family more than any community ever had. Sitting in the chair, working at the desk, I felt more at home. I glanced at the small silver frame sitting at the corner of my computer monitor. Smiling back at me every time I sat here, were the happy faces of my children - all six of them. Esme had insisted on taking the photo at Bella's birthday party, before everything had gone horribly wrong. I kept it with me because it was the only reminder of how close to perfect our family had once been, and because I hoped against hope that one day it would be again.

The cell phone in the pocket of my white lab coat buzzed, breaking me from my thoughts. Pulling it out, I saw Alice's name on the caller ID.

"Hello, Alice," I said, smiling. I missed my daughter, but was proud of her for going to Forks the way she did.

"It's Bella," she responded, so quietly I only heard her because of my vampire hearing.

"Bella," I breathed into the line. Her voice sounded the same as I recalled, yet different somehow. She had aged five years, so I supposed it was natural for her to sound more grown up, but there was something else I couldn't quite put my finger on.

"I need your help," she started bluntly.

"My help?" I asked.

"Well, actually, it's Alice who needs your help."

"Alice?" I inquired, my fatherly instinct, as much as vampire, piquing my concern.

"Yes," she said. "She's alright, I think, but...well, it's complicated, and I really think you need to see her yourself...Will you come?" Bella sounded nervous, her voice rising slightly when she asked.

"I'll leave tonight," I agreed. If something had happened to Alice, I needed to get to her first, and ask questions later.

"We're at the house in Forks," Bella said. "Is it, I mean, would it be...possible...for you to come alone?"

Of course Bella would worry about the entire Cullen clan descending upon her. According to Jasper, she had been fairly angry with Alice at first. Considering we had left her without an honest goodbye and had remained hidden from her for five years, I doubted she was inclined to greet the rest of us with open arms, especially Edward.

"Luckily for you," I said lightly, "I'm at the hospital now, so no one is listening."

"Good," she sighed, sounding relieved.

"I suppose I ought to bring Jasper along, though," I offered. If Alice needed help, she needed Jasper.

"Of course," Bella agreed readily.

"We'll see you tomorrow afternoon, then," I said.

"See you then."

The line went dead, and I rolled the cell phone around in my hands. I needed to call Jasper so he could prepare for our departure. I also needed to decide how the two of us would get out of town without Edward knowing. I had already told him of Alice's whereabouts, and he was waiting at home for her to arrive and give him answers. If he learned Jasper and I were heading to Forks, he would certainly try to go along. I dialed Jasper's number and waited for him to answer.

"You must have ESP or something, Dad," Jasper joked in lieu of a hello.

"Why is that?" I asked.

"I'm in the parking lot," he said. "I was on my way to the airport and thought you might like to ride along."

"Perfect," I said, "I'm coming down now." I ended the call and headed out of my office, grabbing the travel case I kept in the closet on the way.

I met Jasper in the dim parking lot near his car. Opening the back door, I tossed my bag on the seat and said, "Come on, we need to get on the next plane to Seattle."

"What's wrong?" Jasper asked, as he jumped in the car and started the engine.

"Bella called me," I said. "Something is wrong with Alice."

Jasper sped out onto the road, heading for the freeway. "What do you mean wrong?" he asked.

"She didn't say much," I said. "She did say Alice is alright, but that it was complicated and I needed to see for myself."

"She's not alright if she couldn't call you herself," he said, panicked.

I wished in that moment I had Jasper's talent so I could calm him down. Knowing his mate, his Alice, was across the country, in unexplained trouble had to be more than he could bear, yet he still remained composed.

"We'll know more when we get there, son," I said. "I'm sure whatever it is, we can remedy the situation."

We drove towards the airport in silence for a while, Jasper's face pained.

"Bella sounded...well," I said, trying to ease some tension by changing the subject.

"Alice told me something," Jasper said, glancing at me in his periphery, "and I think you should know about it before we get to Forks."

"Something about Bella?" I asked.

"Yes," Jasper answered quietly, "It seems she's...well, she's been...changed," he stammered, keeping his eyes on the road.

Had I heard him clearly?

"Changed?" I asked, not sure my interpretation of his statement was correct.

"Yes," he confirmed. "She's given Alice no details. She won't say who changed her, or when exactly. Alice did say Bella keeps our diet, though," he smiled.

"Bella..." I sighed, "...is a vampire?" I almost laughed.

Jasper smiled and nodded, turning the car onto the freeway exit leading to the airport.

"Hm..." I mused. I could think of nothing else to say. The change I had noticed in Bella's voice was explained to me, at least. I wondered who was responsible for her transformation, why she had not sought the family out afterwards, and felt a sense of pride at her choice not to feed on human blood.

My thoughts shifted quickly to Edward. My son - my stubborn son, who had left Bella because he believed it would save her from the dangers of our world, his need to protect her never allowing him to accept that being one of us was what she'd truly been destined for - how would he react when he found out, and what if Bella's change had been her choice? As much as Edward may have protested about Bella becoming a vampire, all for the sake of her soul, I knew deep down in his own, if Bella's transformation ever came to pass, he would have wanted his to be the venom that coursed through her veins.

A sigh from Jasper brought me back to reality, "I know what you're thinking."

"Edward," I said.

"There is no predicting what his reaction will be," Jasper said. "It has been so hard keeping it from him."

"I'm sure it's been difficult, but he will have no choice but to accept it," I said. "And perhaps, with the decision taken from him, the weight of that particular responsibility lifted, he will tell Bella of his deception and his reasons for leaving her."

"I only hope she's as forgiving a vampire as she was a human," Jasper smiled.

Jasper's words went to the very core of the hope I had - if Edward and Bella could be reunited, if she would forgive him his lies and they could find their way back into each other's hearts, my family would be whole again.

**Bella**

"Jasper and Carlisle will be here tomorrow," I said, placing Alice's phone back in her bag.

"Good," Alice sighed. "I know that was hard for you, Bella," she said, reaching her hand out to me.

I took it and squeezed. "It was just Carlisle," I said, trying to sound as if that were true. Mentally, I was kicking myself for feeling so anxious, something the human me would have felt, but vampire me was supposed to be a kick-ass, tough as nails, shake it off kind of girl. Yet, when faced with Carlisle's voice, I had been reduced to a stammering eighteen-year-old again.

I thought about what Jacob said, about my residual human emotions being my super cool power, and perhaps he was right. But, if so, what the hell kind of power was that? The vampires I knew with preternatural abilities used them for some purpose - Jasper could defuse any tense situation, Alice could save people with her visions, and _He _was a walking lie detector. How could I serve any purpose by feeling the myriad of human emotions?

"Maybe," Alice smiled, breaking through my thoughts, "but you took the chance that he would be home, where _everyone_ in the house could have heard. Thank you."

"You need help," I said, shrugging my shoulders. "Carlisle's a doctor, and he's been a vampire for, what, like a thousand years? So...," I let the attempt at nonchalance die in my throat.

"Still," Alice said.

"Okay, you're welcome," I said. "Better?"

"Yes," Alice smiled again.

I got up and paced around the living room. I had cleaned up most of the mess my earlier rage had produced, but there were still things to straighten out. Setting the upturned end tables back on their feet, I glanced at my reflection in a shattered mirror.

My hair was a tangled mess, my clothes rumpled. I looked like hell, at least to me. It seemed no matter what a vampire went through - lying on the forest floor, fighting off wolves and running halfway to Seattle and back, for instance - humans still saw perfection. However, I felt dirty and desperately wanted to wash my hair.

"Alice?" I asked, "Do you mind if I go take a shower and get cleaned up?"

"Go ahead," she said. "I'll be fine."

"Thanks, but if you need anything, just call, okay?" I ran quickly outside to my car and retrieved my duffle bag from the trunk. Back inside, I called to Alice as I passed her, "When I'm done, I think a little Bella Barbie payback is in order!" Alice had taken great pleasure when I was human in dressing me up like her own personal Barbie doll, so I figured since she couldn't see and needed cleaning up too, it was only fair to return the favor.

Alice's tinkling laughter filled the house as I headed up the stairs to her old bathroom. At the top of the second flight of stairs, I stopped and stared at the closed bedroom door in front of me. I hadn't ventured upstairs when I had been in the house earlier, and now that I was face to face with _his _space, I felt my chest tighten. Part of me wanted to open the door and immerse myself in whatever might have been left behind. Another part of me wanted to take an axe inside, and go for a repeat of my destruction on the lower level.

"That's definitely not a hammer I see," I heard Alice say from the living room.

"At least you're seeing something," I called back to her before turning for the door that led to her bathroom.

Inside Alice's room, I emptied the contents of my bag onto the floor. Pulling my shampoo from the pile, I accidently kicked the conditioner under the chaise lounge in the corner. Lying flat on the floor, I reached underneath and found the bottle, but when I pulled it towards me, a photograph slid out of hiding as well. I turned the glossy paper over in my hands and took in a stuttering breath as I looked at the image.

The sunlight was filtering in through the curtains, creating beautiful prisms of light on the walls. _He _was at the piano, and I was lying on the floor beside the bench. Heappeared to be playing, but his head was turned, watching me watching him.I wished for a moment that I could see his face clearly, so I could gauge the emotion in hisexpression.

I wondered when the picture had been taken, and who'd taken it. I couldn't place the memory, but the overwhelming sense of loss I felt looking at it brought the sting of tears to my eyes. I tried to remember this day, caught in immortality on film, tried to think back on the countless times this scene must have played out. I closed my eyes and attempted to bring the notes of the song hewas playing into my ears. Intuition told me the melody was special, written just for me, and I was irritated that of all the things I could recall, these details were lost. Why did I have a perfect recollection of the horrible things he'dsaid that day in the woods, but only muddied impressions of something which was surely just as significant?

Sighing in defeat, and feeling more emotional than was acceptable, I stood up, slipped the photograph into the pocket of my duffle bag, and headed for the shower.

The hot water felt nice raining over my icy skin. I leaned my forehead against the shower wall and let the water run through my hair, over my back, and down my legs. Knowing Alice was downstairs, I held in the sobs that begged to wrack my aching chest.

For the first year of my new life, I had been angry; at my sire for changing me the way he had, angry at me for not being a 'normal' vampire, but most of all, at _Him _for leaving me alone to end up in this situation in the first place.

Eventually, anger had given way to indifference, and I wandered the globe, aimless and alone, thinking I was doing the only thing I could. _He _didn't want me then, and he'dmade it clear my transformation wasn't desired, so why would he want me now?

I had resigned myself to the fact I would never be a part of _their _family, as I had once dreamed, and so had become content with my fate. Once again, I cursed myself for ever keeping tabs on my parents. If I had never known of Charlie's death, I wouldn't have come back to Forks, and perhaps Alice wouldn't have seen me. Was I content now to see Alice, Jasper and Carlisle only to return to a life on my own? Could I have a small piece of the family I had loved back with me for a short time then watch them leave again? I didn't think so.

Returning to the home I had shared with Charlie, looking through mementos from my human years, seeing Alice and Jacob, knowing Carlisle and Jasper would soon arrive - it was all too much. I sank to my knees, giving in to the invisible tears, and finally grieving for all that had been taken from me.

**Edward**

Alice should have been home an hour ago, but the house was quiet. Jasper had left to pick her up but never returned. Carlisle was still at the hospital, Esme was gone, I didn't know where, and Rosalie and Emmett were hunting. I was still in my room on the floor, listening for the timbre of Alice's mind to arrive in the driveway.

The night before, I had pulled out the box of things I had taken from Bella's bedroom on the night I left Forks. There was an essay she had written for Mr. Wilcox on _Romeo and Juliet,_ a few notes we had exchanged in class, and a handful of photographs. I opened the folded paper in my hand and ran my fingers over the words:

_You are __**so**__ going to have to help me with the homework!_

_If you want us to be alone, Bella, just say so. _

_You don't need to use homework as an excuse._

_Shut up, Edward!_

_You love me._

_I do...but I still need help with the homework._

Most of the other pages were filled with the same, seemingly mundane, thoughts, and I had each written conversation memorized. In my mind, I could see the look on her face as she wrote every word, the surprise in her eyes when I returned an answer too quickly, the smile that played on her lips whenever she read the words 'I love you' on each one.

My favorite of the photographs was one of Bella and my sisters. It had been a rare day, when Rosalie had let her normally rigid guard down and gotten into Alice's game of dress up. They had taken Bella shopping, spent what she insisted was too much money, and returned to our house to make her model every outfit they'd purchased. In the picture, Bella was wearing a beautiful, deep purple dress. Alice had fixed her hair in soft waves that hung over her shoulders, and Rosalie had applied what little make-up Bella would allow. The three of them stood in front of the mantle, arms around each other, smiling like regular teenage girls. It was my favorite because the smile on Bella's face was radiant and confident, as though she were finally feeling inside of herself what I saw in her every moment of every day.

Emmett's booming laughter filtered in through the open window. He was ribbing Rosalie about taking down a bigger moose than she had. I heard the crack as she slapped him across the back of his head and smiled. For all my posturing of annoyance at my siblings, I was jealous of what they all had with one another. Emmett and Rosalie, in spite of their violent tendencies, were loving and playful in their own way, Alice and Jasper were tender and sweet natured together, and our parents were the epitome of 'meant to be' as far as I could tell. It had been some time since I had felt these pangs in my chest, but I had pushed them down for five years, knowing I couldn't go on if I dwelled on what I had lost.

_What I lost? I didn't lose her, I left her._

I knew I was to blame for not having what everyone else in the family did. It had been within my grasp, and s_he _was willing. It was my decision which brought me to this day, lying on my floor in a heap clutching notes and a photograph to my chest.

Wondering again why Alice and Jasper weren't yet home, I pulled my phone from my pocket and sent Alice a text message:

_Where are you?_

Didn't she know I was here waiting for her? Couldn't she see me desperately clinging to scraps of my past, anticipating her return? Minutes passed with no reply. I could hear Emmett and Rosalie downstairs, but rather than join them for some distraction, I closed my eyes and replayed the memory of the photograph in my hands, reminding myself of what could have been.

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End Notes: Do we feel sorry for Edward yet? Hit that pretty little button down there! You know you want to! :) **


	11. Chapter 11 Hate Me

**A/N: Okay, ladies...here it is...The Big Reveal! I'm nervous as hell about how y'all are going to feel about it!**

**Claire, I don't know how else to say this- YOU ARE AWESOME! You're guidance makes me better with each and every page, and your praise makes my heart sing! Words can not express how lucky I feel to have found you, babe! xx**

**SM still owns...  
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**CHAPTER ELEVEN - Hate Me**

"**Hate me today**

**Hate me tomorrow**

**Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you..."**

_**Hate Me, Blue October**_

**Edward**

I opened my eyes to find Emmett standing in the doorway of my bedroom.

"Go away," I said.

"No can do," he replied.

"It's easy," I said, "just turn around and walk away. I'm really not in the mood."

"Unfortunately for you, I really don't give a shit," Emmett smirked. "Rosalie sent me up here to drag your sorry ass downstairs, so I'm not leaving without you."

"Tell Rosalie..." I began, but was interrupted by Emmett's hands grabbing at the collar of my shirt and yanking me to my feet. I could have fought back, after all, I was faster, but it didn't seem worth the effort.

"She has something to tell you," he said, his face centimeters from mine.

"I don't care," I said through clenched teeth. I wasn't inclined to listen to Rosalie's bitching at the moment. All I wanted was for Alice to come home and tell me something, anything, about Bella. I wanted her to tell me that Bella was safe and sound, living a normal human life, so I could go back to blocking all thoughts of her from my mind, and my dead heart could once again go numb, the way it deserved to be.

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen," I heard the rough sound of Rosalie's voice from downstairs, "don't make me come up there!"

Emmett laughed, and set me on my feet. "Are you coming, or do I have to carry you?" he asked, laughing a little. "Please say you're coming because I really don't want to throw you over my shoulder, dude."

I punched Emmett in the chest, forcing him back into the wall. "Fine," I sighed.

Rosalie was standing at the bottom of the first floor landing, with one hand on her hip, the fingers of the other tapping on the banister. Stopping on the step above her, I glared at my sister.

"Have you talked to Alice?" I asked the one question to which the answer mattered.

"No," Rosalie said.

"Then whatever you have to say, I don't want to hear it," I said. I turned to go back upstairs, but Rosalie's voice stopped me.

"I talked to Jasper," she said, halting my steps.

"And?" I asked without turning to face her.

"He and Carlisle are on their way to Forks," she said.

Above me on the staircase, Emmett was smiling. "See?"

Slowly, I turned to Rosalie, stalking past her on the bottom step and into the living room. Putting my hand in my pocket, I felt the shiny paper of the photograph I had clutched in my hand when Emmett grabbed me off my floor. Both he and Rosalie sat on the sofa, facing opposite the fireplace where I was gripping the mantle, trying not to crush the marble.

"Why are they going to Forks?" I asked, tugging at my hair.

"Apparently, something is wrong with Alice," Rosalie said. Seeing the panic in my eyes when I spun to face her, she quickly added, "She's okay, but something weird happened, I guess, so Carlisle is going to check on her."

"Weird?" I asked incredulously. Nothing 'weird' ever happened to vampires. I was momentarily shaken by the thought that perhaps it was Bella to whom something had happened.

"His words, not mine," Rosalie said.

"Why didn't she just come home?" I asked, pacing the floor.

"She couldn't," Rosalie said, shrugging her shoulders. "All I know is what he told me, and that wasn't much."

"But she's well enough to have called," I said, mostly to myself, mostly to assuage my fear that something awful really had happened to my sister. I could think of nothing which could hurt Alice, vampires were impervious to illness or injury, but obviously something was amiss.

Emmett gave Rosalie a strange look, and Rosalie nodded. Emmett raised his eyebrows in silent question. They were distracted with one another, so I slipped into Emmett's head and could hear him thinking, _"He's going to flip out." _

Rosalie's lips were pursed into a hard line and her eyes went wide as she thought, _"So? He's going to find out eventually."_

"What am I going to find out?" I asked.

"Damn it, Edward!" Rosalie cried, slapping her hands down on the sofa. "Stay the hell out of my head!"

"Then tell me what's going on!" I yelled.

"Fine," she huffed. "Alice didn't call Carlisle," she said, quirking one perfect eyebrow in my direction.

"If Alice didn't call him, then..." I couldn't finish the sentence aloud. If Alice was unable to call our father herself, there was only one other possibility.

Emmett completed my thought, "Bella did."

I cringed slightly when he said her name out loud. Falling into Esme's favorite overstuffed leather chair, I sighed and leaned against the back.

"Will you stop doing that?" Rosalie sneered.

"Stop doing what?" I asked.

"That!" Rosalie cried, waving her hands at me, "that ridiculous 'She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named' bullshit! It's just her name, for Christ's sake! Bella!" she shouted, leaning towards me, gripping at her knees. "Just say it, you brooding, moody, control freak! Bella! Bella! Bella!"

I growled at Rosalie, and Emmett elbowed her in the ribs. "Give the guy a break, Rosie," he said.

"No," she snapped. "I've been giving him a break for the last five years! I'm sick and tired of this crap! She's a girl, Emmett. She's a living, breathing, human girl, not some kind of monster in the closet! And she has a name!"

"She's not just a girl," I whispered.

Rosalie stood, took a deep breath and crossed the room to sit on the ottoman at my feet. "I didn't say she was _just _a girl, Edward. That's why this aversion you have to any of us saying her name is stupid."

I looked at Rosalie and saw the tiniest bit of compassion in her eyes. I was used to Rosalie calling me out on my many faults, and to see her guard slipping a little was comforting, yet unnerving at the same time. It seemed, despite her fervent objections and general lack of kindness, Rosalie had at least some friendly feelings when it came to Bella.

"Actually," Emmett, in all his wisdom, said, "I think that's exactly why he has an aversion to her name."

"Shut up, Emmett," Rosalie said, smiling. "The important thing right now is something is wrong with Alice."

"You're right," I said, lifting my head and straightening up in the chair. "What did Jasper say exactly?"

"Just that Bella called Carlisle asking for help," she said. "Jasper was at the hospital to see if Carlisle wanted to ride to the airport with him. They caught the next plane to Seattle."

"I wish they had called first," Emmett said. "I would've gone with them."

"Jasper and Carlisle can handle it," Rosalie said firmly.

"I know, but it would have been nice to see..." Emmett didn't get to finish. Rosalie picked up a pillow and tossed it at his head.

"What?" Emmett asked, throwing the pillow back across the room. She shot him a glare and he defended himself, "We left Forks in such a rush, I'm sure I forgot something at the house," he stammered.

In spite of Emmett's attempt at deflection, I knew what he meant to say. It would have been nice to see _her._ I couldn't fault him for wanting to see her. He had adored her, treated her like another sister, and I hadn't given him, any of them, an opportunity to say goodbye.

I was in my room before Emmett and Rosalie could even see me move from the chair. I tossed some clothes, my passport and some cash into a bag with my iPod and cell phone, and headed for the garage. Emmett was waiting for me, sitting on the hood of my car.

"Where are you going?" he asked, arms crossed, eyeing me as though I were a teenager trying to sneak out of his bedroom window.

"Get in, or go back in the house," I said, opening the car door and throwing my bag into the back seat. "Either way get off my car."

Emmett smiled and called in through the open door, "Rosie! Grab the bags! We're going to Forks with the brooding, moody control freak!"

* * *

"Welcome aboard flight sixteen-twenty, non-stop service to Seattle, Washington. Our flight time to SeaTac Airport this evening will be five hours, fourteen minutes. At this time, please turn your attention to the flight crew at the head of the cabin..." the pilot's voice droned on about safety measures and electronic devices. I listened to him intently as a means to deflect the thoughts of those seated around us.

Emmett was pretending to be a first time flier, while Rosalie attempted to rein in his antics. I understood my brother's penchant for melodramatics, he was basically a five-year-old trapped in the body of Superman. He had so few outlets for his overabundance of energy outside of tracking moose and grizzly bears. I didn't begrudge him his fun, though I wished for the moment that he would kindly knock it off.

I pulled my iPod from my carry-on and put in the earbuds. I pressed play, only to be bombarded with the screeching sounds of an obnoxious guitar riff.

"Emmett," I seethed, too quiet for anyone else to hear. Yanking the earbuds from my ears, I glared at him.

Emmett looked at me and winked. "Just a little playlist for the self-loathing," he smirked.

I scrolled through the iPod to find he had wiped my playlists clean, replacing them with the drivel he classified as music. Deciding it was better than hearing the thoughts of anxious businessmen and over exhausted mother's, I replaced the earbuds and skipped to the next song.

The beginning sounded like a cacophony of children's voices, followed by a scratchy recording of what appeared to be a voicemail. Emmett nudged me with his elbow and laughed, "That one should be your theme song, bro."

Turning in my seat, I closed my eyes and listened to the lyrics:

_**I have to block out thoughts of you, **_

_**so I don't lose my head...**_

_**...There's a burning in my pride **_

_**a nervous bleeding in my brain**_

_**An ounce of peace is all I want for you **_

_**Will you never call again?**_

_**And will you never say that you love me **_

_**just to put it in my face?**_

_**And will you never try to reach me?**_

_**It is I that wanted space**_

I hated to admit it, but Emmett seemed to be right, the song was speaking to the very core of my feelings regarding Bella.

_**Hate me today**_

_**Hate me tomorrow**_

_**Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you**_

_**Hate me in ways**_

_**Ways hard to swallow**_

_**Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you**_

Isn't that what I had done, made her hate me because I believed it was best for her?

_**While I was busy waging wars on myself, **_

_**you were trying to stop the fight**_

_**You never doubted my warped opinions **_

_**on things like suicidal hate...**_

_**...So I'll drive so fucking far away **_

_**that I never cross your mind**_

_**And do whatever it takes in your heart**_

_**to leave me behind**_

I was still waging a war on myself, five years later. The practical, logical part of my brain told me to stay in Vermont, not to complicate her life more than I already had. I had taken my family as far away from Forks as we could get, so there was no chance she could find us, hoping she would realize I was no good for her. Alice had interrupted whatever life Bella had built for herself, and I doubted she was happy about it.

_**Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be**_

_**And then she whispered, **_

"_**How can you do this to me?"**_

_**Hate me today,**_

_**Hate me tomorrow,**_

_**Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you...**_

I wanted to punch Emmett for being right - this could be a theme song for me. I had wanted Bella to hate me, it was the only way. If I thought for a moment she hadn't believed my lies, that she might come looking for me, I would never have a minute's peace. My world was too dangerous for her. The only option I had, loving her as I did, was to force her out, as there was no way she would leave voluntarily. She thought she wanted this existence, but she was naive. In time, she would have hated me anyway, for taking her life from her. The only way to save her from an eternity of regret was to break her human heart while it still beat in her chest.

So why was I on a plane, heading towards her? I put the song on repeat and opened my eyes, staring out of the window. How would she react when she saw me? How would I? Could I see her again, and not tell her my secret? Was it possible to be in the same room with her and resist the urges I would feel - to take her exquisite scent into my lungs again, to feel her face in my hands, her lips on mine, to devour her in the most human of ways, to beg her forgiveness?

_I shouldn't be here. I promised her... so why am I on this plane?_

_Because I desperately want to know for myself that she is, indeed, alright. I want to see her, touch her, and smell her again. I want to tell her of my atrocious lies and ask her how she so easily accepted them. I want to declare my love for her over and over, until she forgives me...That is, if she will even speak to me._

A soft voice in my ear broke me from my musings, "Edward, dear, it will be okay."

"Esme?" I said in disbelief. Turning in my seat, I looked over the headrest to see my mother buckling her seat belt.

"Well, you didn't think I was going to let all of you go to Forks without me, did you?" she asked with a slight twinkle in her eye. I didn't need to read her mind to know she was as excited as Emmett was at the prospect of seeing Bella again.

"This is insane," I sighed. "We shouldn't be doing this. We shouldn't be going back there."

"Yes, Edward," Esme said quietly, "we should. I've spoken to your father, and trust me, son, you need to do this."

"Does he know we're on our way?" I asked.

"No," she said. "He didn't answer when I called to tell him."

"Alice will know," Rosalie said.

And for once, I resented my sister's ability, for without it none of this would have happened. Bella would still have been free to live her life, whatever it had become. The more I considered what I was doing, what I wanted to do, the more I realized how wrong it was of me. I had made her a promise when I left her, and if I could do nothing else right, I would keep that promise. When the family reached the house in Forks, I resolved, I would stay behind in the woods, listen - to the sound of her heartbeat, the resonance of her voice - but I would hold my breath, and I would not see her. I would be assured that she was healthy and safe, and then I would leave. It was the only way I could both get what I wanted, and give her what she deserved.

Halfway between Seattle and Forks, Esme suggested she and I walk alone together.

"Emmett, Rosalie, we'll meet you on the edge of town," she said, "I need to talk to Edward." Emmett shrugged and pulled a disgruntled Rosalie off with him.

Esme and I walked a little ways in silence before she came to rest on the bank of a small brook.

"Sit with me," she said, patting the ground beside her. Folding my feet beneath me, I sat next to her, and she hooked her arm through mine. "Tell me what you're thinking," she said.

"I shouldn't be here," I sighed. "I should have stayed home. Hell, I should never have asked Carlisle where Alice was in the first place."

Esme reached up with her free hand and tousled my hair. "Such a stubborn boy," she laughed lightly.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"You spend so much time thinking," she said. "I guess it's only natural with your gift of reading others' thoughts that you should be so inclined, but, Edward..." she sighed and picked at a non-existent thread on my sleeve, "sometimes what's right isn't about logic. Sometimes, what is right doesn't fit a prescribed notion, doesn't necessarily make sense. Sometimes, what is right just _is._ And oftentimes, fate has a way of making things happen...even when we do our level best to prevent those very things." Esme looked at me affectionately, and then leaned her head on my shoulder. "I know you had your reasons for what you did, son, but there are times in life when we have to learn we simply cannot control everything. This, my dear, stubborn son, is one of those times."

I had no response. Esme had put me in my place, no doubt, but with such grace and eloquence, there was no argument to be made. She let go of my arm and stood, reaching for my hand. As we neared the town limits, we met up with Emmett and Rose, and I stopped.

"Esme," I said, determined to keep my plan of not interfering in place, "I'm not going in the house. I want you to go in with Emmett and Rosalie, and please keep any of them from telling Bella I'm here. Seeing all of you will be enough for her, she doesn't need..." I trailed off, running my hands through my hair.

"Oh, _now _we can say her name," Rosalie smirked and rolled her eyes.

Esme gave Rosalie a disapproving look. "I will do as you ask," she agreed, more readily than I had anticipated. "But I don't know that it will be necessary." She smiled at me, a strange, knowing smile, and ran off.

As we approached the house, I slowed down, turned my head in the opposite direction, and took a deep breath. At the tree line, I nearly knocked Emmett over. He had stopped, putting his arm out to halt Rosalie as well, a confused look on his face. Esme came to stand beside him and put a hand on his arm.

"Wait," she whispered.

"What?" I asked, careful to only let air out of my lungs.

"Listen," Esme said.

From inside the house, I heard Carlisle and Jasper speaking, though they were whispering too softly to make out their words. I heard movement as well, Alice I supposed. What I didn't hear was the distinct sound of a heartbeat.

"She isn't here," the spoken thought was half statement, half question.

Emmett had a huge, almost giddy grin on his face as he took in a huge breath, and Rosalie gasped, looking as though she'd seen a ghost, and then inhaled tentatively.

Esme smiled warmly, "Oh, she's here."

Rosalie looked at Esme in disbelief, hands in place on her hips, "What? That's...what?"

"Really?" Emmett asked Esme, excitement alight in his eyes, and she nodded. "Oh, this is fucking priceless!" he roared in amusement, gaining an admonishing glare from Esme for his language.

"What is wrong with all of you?" I asked.

"Breathe, Edward," Esme said. I shook my head. I had no intention of taking in air that would taste of Bella.

"Do it," Emmett chuckled, wagging his eyebrows at me.

Esme stepped back and took my hand. "It's okay," she said.

I looked from her to Emmett, who was smiling like a fool, and then to Rosalie, who still looked a little shell-shocked. I shook my head again. Before any of them could say anything else, Carlisle stepped onto the back porch.

"Edward," he spoke quietly.

I looked towards him and his stance was rigid, like he was on the defensive. Of course, he was, I supposed. My father was guarding _Her _from me. I saw his eyes widen, but I was so confused at his manner, at the reactions of Emmett and Rosalie, I didn't process that he was trying to talk to me, silently.

"Listen to your father," Esme whispered.

_Edward._

I nodded, watching Carlisle's eyes intently.

_Listen to me._

I nodded again.

_If you come inside, you must swear to me that you will retain your composure. Do you understand?_

This time, I shook my head rather than nod. I didn't understand, not at all.

_Bella __**is**__ here._

Seeing the look of sheer confusion on my face, Carlisle smiled weakly and sighed.

_I know you can't hear her heartbeat, son, but she is in the house._

Panic - that's surely what he saw in my eyes and heard in the growl that emanated unbidden from my chest. If Bella was in the house, I should have been able to hear her heart beating. Since I couldn't find the sound in my ears, the only answer was that she was no longer breathing. Why else would Carlisle insist I retain my composure? My fists clenched at my sides, and I felt Emmett tug on my arm, holding me back.

_No. _Carlisle thought forcefully._ Calm, Edward, you need to stay calm. She is well, I assure you, better than well, if I'm being honest._

"I...don't...understand," I said, straining against Emmett's hold and the thoughts rushing through my head.

And then, as if in slow motion, the entire universe shifted. I registered the sound of the back door swinging open, and I vaguely noticed as Carlisle reached behind him to stop it, his eyes never leaving mine. The female form that backed into Carlisle stumbled, long, chestnut hair billowing over her small shoulders. She placed her hand on his arm, and he reached out to steady her.

"Thank you," she said. "What's all the..." and she spun to face him, catching sight of Esme, Emmett, Rosalie and I in the yard. "Oh," she quietly exclaimed, clutching one hand to her chest where her heart lay, latching onto Carlisle's arm with the other.

I watched, not really seeing, as she looked at each of us in turn. When her eyes met mine, I felt my legs almost go out from underneath me. I gasped, taking in a lungful of air.

Strawberries and freesia, sunshine and cloudless nights, meadow grasses and wildflowers, memory and..._Bella_...

I closed my eyes tightly, breaking one hand free from Emmett's grasp to rub them. When I opened them again, she was still standing on the steps with Carlisle, staring at me, burning holes into me with her deep, amber eyes.

_Amber eyes? _

Like a flash of lightning, before I could sort out what I was seeing, she was inches in front of me, held back by Carlisle and Emmett, and growling at me - the sound was guttural and low and - angry.

As if I were watching a movie play out in front of me, rather than participating in the action myself, I stared as Esme reached out hesitantly and stroked her arm.

"Bella, dear," Esme whispered.

For a moment, Bella's features softened as she looked quickly to my mother. Just as quickly, her attention was back on me, seething and indignant. I felt a strange shift again as forced serenity engulfed us all. In my periphery, I saw Jasper walking towards us. Slowly, he slid one arm around Bella's waist and whispered something in her ear. Over and over he spoke to her, and as he calmed her, he cleared my head as well.

I stared in complete and utter disbelief at the creature in front of me. It was Bella, make no mistake, but she was... I couldn't even think the word. I took a step backwards, causing Emmett to release me just a bit. I continued, and for every step I took, Jasper took one in the opposite direction, pulling Bella with him. Soon, we were ten feet apart, Bella's hands gripping Jasper's arm around her waist. Some primal part of me was consumed by jealous rage at my brother's hands on her.

"Mine," I whispered. I hadn't meant to say it aloud.

And she laughed, a thunderous, cruel cackle that sent chills up my spine, "Mine?"

Jasper bent to whisper to her again, but she fought him this time, straining against his grip on her waist. The tenuous hold he had on all our emotions came crumbling down as she wrenched away from him and headed straight for me.

"Yours?" she wailed, her voice thick with sarcasm. "How dare you?"

Still in shock and unable to accept what I was seeing, I held up my hands defensively and recoiled at the sound of her voice. She sounded the same, only different, more musical and delicate. She stopped five feet from me, rocking back on her heels and staring, her mouth agape and her eyes wide with fury. It occurred to me she was taking my reaction all wrong, and I should say something, but I couldn't form any words. A million thoughts were running through my head simultaneously.

_How did this happen?_

_When?_

_Did my entire family know all along? Why didn't they tell me?_

_Was it an accident? Or did you seek out someone to do this to you?_

_Why didn't you come looking for me after?_

_Who did this to you?_

_Why couldn't it have been me?_

I had so many thoughts, so many questions, but no answers. The only person with answers was leaping towards me, fists out, eyes blazing. Once again, before I could even process her movement, I was flying through the trees, her punch having landed square in the middle of my chest.

I heard a commotion as I landed on my back, the voices of my family begging her to calm down, and another feral snarl from Bella. She was on top of me in no time, pounding on my chest and screaming.

"How dare you?" she screamed as she pinned me down. "I hate you! I hate you!" She thrashed her words into my soul as she pummeled my chest with her fists.

"I..." She punched me again.

"Hate..." Another punch and I closed my eyes.

"You!" With that, she slapped me across the face, the sting causing my eyes to leap open.

And then, as quickly as she had come at me, she was gone.

**End Notes: *Hides behind computer* Like I said, I'm really nervous about how you are going to feel about the reunion, but I want to know even more! So, hit that pretty Review button and let me have it! :)**


	12. Chapter 12 Face to Face

**A/N: Hello again, my lovelies! So...I've got several things to say here, so bear with me...**

****I don't usually write overlapping chapters because I generally don't enjoy reading them. It seems to me that whichever character speaks is the one whose perspective is most important to whatever is happening. And for The Big Reveal, Edward spoke up first. However, this is, in fact, Bella's story, so here you will get her side of the big moment. **

****You MUST go to my profile and find the link for the AMAZING banner the lovely and talented Ferla V made for me! It is perfect, and captures everything I could possibly imagine for this story! **

**As always, many thanks to my RL gals- L and G- for being my sounding boards and for your unending support! I love y'all!**

**Claire...what can be said that hasn't already been said? You are amazing, and I am so lucky to have you!**

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**CHAPTER TWELVE - Face to Face**

**"All the girls that you never see**

**Forever a mystery**

**All the girls with their secret ways**

**All the girls who have gone astray**

**Be careful how you bend me**

**Be careful where you send me**

**Careful how you end me**

**Be careful with me..."**

_**Be Careful, Patty Griffin**_

**Bella**

"There," I said as I put the last swipe of mascara on Alice's doe eyes, "all finished."

After I had cleaned myself up and changed clothes, I had taken some much needed revenge on Alice. Her vision, the literal kind, was still gone, though, preventing her from fully appreciating what I had done. She was dressed in a bright yellow, satin blouse, black tulle skirt with tiny white rhinestones all over it, yellow leggings and silver ballet flats - all of the items so new I'd had removed the tags from most of them. Her hair was, again, spiked to perfection, and her makeup was dramatic, even by Alice's standards - thick, smoky eyeliner, a shock of silver shadow, some rosy blush and harlot red lipstick. I admired her, considering this round of payback complete.

"Stand up," I said, pulling my phone out of the pocket of my jeans, as she got to her feet. "Now, smile. I'm taking a picture so you can revel in my handiwork once you're better." Alice laughed as I snapped a photo.

"How much longer?" she asked.

Checking the clock on my phone, I said, "Shouldn't be long now. It's already noon."

Alice was on pins and needles waiting for Jasper and Carlisle to arrive. I could see the fear on her face, despite her attempts to smile. She was worried; frightened her condition may be permanent. I was anxious and afraid for her, too, but I had my own issues added into the mix. Every noise outside brought with it near panic, my chest tightening and my stomach dropping to my knees. Deciding I needed some kind of warning of their approach, I sent Carlisle a quick text, using Alice as an excuse:

_ETA? Alice getting antsy_

_~B_

I smiled at his quick response:

_Be there in 30 min_

_~C_

"Thirty minutes," I told Alice as she lounged on the sofa.

"Good," she sighed. "Are you ready?"

I shrugged my shoulders as I sat beside her then remembered she couldn't see me. "I guess," I said quietly, "not that it really matters."

"Of course how you feel matters, Bella," Alice said. "If you don't think you can face them, it's okay. You can go. I'll be fine for half an hour."

"No," I stated firmly, "I'm not leaving you." I scooted closer to her and put my arm around her shoulder.

"I should have said that," she whispered.

"What?"

"I should have said that," she repeated, "to Ed...to my brother. I should have told him I wasn't leaving you."

"Alice," I sighed, "don't, you don't have to..."

"Yes, I do," she said, laying the side of her head against mine, "I'm so sorry, Bella."

"We've been through this," I hugged her to me. "I know you're sorry, and it's alright. I forgive you."

"Really and truly?" she asked, sounding very childlike and innocent.

"Really and truly," I smiled. "It wasn't your fault. I know how...persuasive _He _can be when he wants things a certain way."

Alice was quiet for a moment before she asked, "And you've forgiven Jasper?"

"We've been over this, too," I said. "There's nothing to forgive, but if I need to say the words, then, yes, I forgive Jasper, too."

"What about the others?" she asked.

"Look, Alice," I said, "I get it. I know that none of you really had a choice. It was either leave Forks or lose _Him._ I don't blame you for leaving, not anymore. He's your brother, Carlisle and Esme's son. You had to choose your family over me."

"You're family," she sighed. "You always were."

"For a little while, yes," I said, feeling the sadness I had long tramped down rising up in my chest. "But that changed the instant _He _decided he didn't want me anymore."

"That never changed," Alice insisted, "not for me, or for any of the others, Bella. You have to know that." I felt like there was something else she wanted to say, but she sighed instead, letting whatever it was remain unsaid.

"Maybe," I mused, feeling a lump form in my throat, my emotions threatening to get the better of me again.

"You can't forgive him?" she asked, her voice full of hope and longing.

I stared blankly at the wall in front of me. Could I forgive him? All I had wanted was _His _happiness. Sure, I had wanted him to be able to be happy with me, but he wasn't, so could I truly begrudge him letting me go? What angered me most was the way in which he'd left me, in the woods alone, beaten down and broken, with so little explanation, feeling as though the entire world had been pulled out from underneath me. For that, forgiveness was not forthcoming.

"No," I said simply.

I said nothing else, and, thankfully, Alice asked no more questions. We sat in anxious silence for the next seventeen minutes and forty-three seconds. My phone beeped with a text message:

_At the edge of town._

_See you in 5._

_~C_

"Five minutes," I told Alice. Suddenly, my eyes burned, and my throat constricted.

Alice stood up and made her way to the front door from memory, and with outstretched hands. I stood, but was frozen in place, a deep, tugging pang in my chest, and I fought to keep my hands from shaking. My breathing was erratic, and I was feeling a bit nauseous. Hanging my head in my hands, I took in a deep breath. Strangely, my peculiar mind chose that moment to recover a long lost memory of my mother.

"_Breathe, Isabella, in through your nose, out through your mouth."_

"_I'm getting dizzy, Renee'."_

"_Slowly, honey," she said. "It will be over soon."_

_The man in the white lab coat sat beside me, a small needle in his hands._

"_It will only hurt for a second," he said, placing the cold, steel tip to the vein in my elbow._

"_In..." Renee' coached me, "...and out..."_

In...out...in...out...

"Jasper!" Alice's excited squeal of relief broke me from my new mantra.

I ran my hands through my hair and took one last breath. The air in the room was filled with their essence; Jasper, peppermint and sandalwood, and Carlisle, cloves and misty, English countryside.

"Alice," Jasper drawled, his sweet, Southern accent causing my mouth to draw up into a smile, "honey. What's happened to you?"

I heard rather than saw them embrace, as I was still planted in my spot.

"Where's Carlisle?" Alice asked. "I can sense him, but..."

"You can't see me, Alice?" Carlisle's voice broke through, and I found myself drawn to it, walking towards the door without any conscious effort. As I stepped around the sofa, the resonance of his voice bounced around in my brain, flooding my mind with images from long ago - our first meeting in the ER, the countless times he had stitched me up after a fall, the way he tended to me, body and soul, on my last human birthday. I realized, as my feet carried me towards them, the enormity of the loneliness I had felt since they left.

Alice shook her head slowly in the direction of his voice, and I answered for her, "She can see light, and figures, but nothing is clear."

"Bella," Carlisle said, brushing past Alice and Jasper to stand in front of me. Hesitantly, he held his arms slightly open in invitation.

Not surprisingly, I was overcome with emotion. Unshed tears prickled violently behind my eyes. It had been too long since I had felt the comfort of strong arms around me, and my whole body ached to be wrapped in his fatherly embrace. I reached out to him with one hand, and he took a step closer. Staring at him, I saw him for the first time in perfect detail.

_He's so beautiful. _I briefly wondered how different _He _would look to me if I ever saw him through these eyes.

"Oh, Bella," Carlisle said softly, breaking me from my reverie, "how I've missed you."

Without further hesitation, and simply because I wanted to so badly, I fell into his waiting arms, grasping at his coat sleeves. Carlisle wrapped his arms around me and held me to his chest. My entire being shook, a gut wrenching sob overtaking me.

"Shh," he whispered, stroking my hair. "Here, let's have a look at you." Holding onto my shoulders, he pushed back a little and gazed at me in wonder. "Well," he smiled, "Alice was right yet again. You do make for a magnificent vampire."

Five years earlier, my self-consciousness at such a compliment would have been evident in my flushed cheeks. I had to settle for looking at my feet instead.

"Still easily embarrassed, I see," he smiled, placing a finger under my chin and lifting my face.

"Oh, Carlisle," I cried, hugging him once more.

Alice cleared her throat and laughed, "I hate to interrupt, but..."

I glanced over to see Jasper nervously watching me intently. Smiling, I disengaged myself from Carlisle and reached out to Jasper.

"Bella," he said, taking my hand, "It is so good to see you. And, if I may say so, you are rather stunning."

"Now, Jasper," I teased, "no need wasting all that Texas charm on me. Hasn't Alice told you, I'm not angry?"

Jasper smiled and squeezed my fingers. Sliding between him and Alice, I placed my arms around his neck, and hugged him fiercely.

My eyes still stinging, I leaned in close to his ear, "God, I've missed you both so much."

Carlisle led us into the living room, saying nothing of the lack of furniture. Jasper helped Alice to the sofa and sat down, pulling her into his lap. I sat by the fireplace while Carlisle stood in the middle of the room.

"Now," he said, shifting into doctor mode, "tell me exactly what happened."

Alice recounted the ordeal, from my first warning, to the attack by the wolves. I could see the anger flash in Carlisle's eyes as he listened to the details.

"If it hadn't been for Bella and Jacob," Alice was concluding, "I think they might have..."

"That's enough," Jasper said, tightening his grip on Alice's tiny waist and placing a soft kiss on her shoulder.

"It's Okay, Jasper," she smiled, reaching up to palm his cheek. "Bella saved me."

"And Jacob made Sam and the others leave," I added.

"Are you speaking of Jacob Black?" Carlisle inquired.

"Yes," I said. "Do you know him?"

"Not personally," he explained. "I knew his great-grandfather, Ephraim Black. He was the Quileute elder I made the treaty with, all those years ago. I also met his father, Billy, when we returned to Forks."

"Oh," I said, stunned. Jacob had left out those particular details, and I doubted he was unaware.

"And what of this Sam?" Jasper asked. "He's the Alpha, I presume?"

"The what?" I asked.

"The leader," Carlisle said.

"He must be," I agreed. "Jacob said that's who told him to check out my scent, and he seemed to be in charge. Jacob also said it was Sam he told about Alice."

"So, they knew you were a Cullen?" Carlisle asked Alice, and I could hear the anger laced in his words.

At the sound of their name being spoken, I jumped in my seat. It seemed silly, even to me. I was, after all, in their house, three of them with me. But five years - one thousand, eight hundred, twenty five days; forty three thousand, eight hundred hours - had passed since the last time I had spoken or heard the word out loud.

"Cullen," I whispered, forgetting for a moment that they would hear me, and reveling in the feel of the word rolling off my tongue.

"Finally," Alice giggled.

I smiled at her, and at myself. Saying it didn't hurt as much as I'd thought.

The four of us spent the next few hours, trying to crack the code to Alice's condition. Carlisle retrieved some books which had been left behind, and made a few hushed phone calls. Jasper made Alice perform all sorts of tasks - standing on one foot, walking across the room, running in the front yard, holding his hand up in front of her and asking her, "How many fingers am I holding up now?"

Finally, Alice had had enough, and she fell into Jasper's lap, begging, "Please, no more! I'm frustrated, and oddly enough, I feel almost tired."

"Okay, darlin'," Jasper drawled, kissing her on the temple.

"Besides," Alice whined, "I'm thirsty. Do you think I can hunt?"

"No!" Jasper and I both cried, then laughed.

"Sorry, babe," Jasper said, "too dangerous for you out there right now."

"Besides," I said, "Jacob doesn't know we're still here, or that Jasper and Carlisle have come. We don't need any more run-ins at the moment. I'll have to call him later, I suppose."

"Fine," Alice huffed.

"How about I go drain a nice big deer for you?" I asked, patting her on the knee.

"Oh, Bella, would you?" she asked. "It won't be the same, but it'll do."

"Sure thing, Alice," I smiled.

I found an old thermos in the kitchen, it was red and black checked and had a Newton's Outfitters sticker on the bottom. I laughed at the idea of vampires keeping such an item in the house, imagining Emmett standing at the checkout to buy it, as I headed out to catch Alice some dinner.

Finding a suitable deer was easy enough, and I was soon on my back to the house. When I walked in the door, Alice was perched on the kitchen counter, eyes wide, concentrating. Jasper was standing in front of her, his hands on her knees. Alice let out a huff.

"Nothing!" she cried, throwing her hands up in the air. "I can't see anything!"

"What's going on?" I asked.

"She's trying to get a vision," Jasper said. "Something easy, but it's not working."

"Yeah, we tried that last night," I said, walking over and placing the opened thermos in Alice's hands. "I made a simple decision, but she didn't get a clear picture. She almost got it right, but not entirely."

Alice took the thermos and brought it to her lips, "Thanks, Bella." She took a sip and turned up her nose. "Sheesh, it's cold already."

"Shall I microwave it for you, Miss Cullen?" I asked, rolling my eyes at Jasper who suppressed a chuckle.

"That's Mrs. Cullen-Hale to you, missy," Alice laughed, sitting the thermos on the counter. "Thanks, anyway."

I smiled to myself, enjoying the easy banter between old friends. It was yet another reason I missed this family so much, how well we all got along. The pang in my chest pulled tighter when I thought about how many conversations like this I had missed in the last five years.

"So, what were you trying to see anyway?" I asked, taking the bottle to the sink and rinsing it out. I needed a distraction from my sappy thoughts.

"Oh, you know," Alice evaded, "nothing special."

"Uh-huh," I said, not believing her.

"She was trying to see if Ed..."

"Stop!" Alice shouted, and I heard her slap Jasper's arm. "Don't," she said more softly, shaking her head. "She doesn't..."

"Oh don't tell me," Jasper said incredulously, "she's got a Voldemort complex, too?"

"Indeed," Alice said. "It's really, very frustrating."

"Shut up," I hissed playfully. "I'm sorry, Jasper, it's just..."

"It's alright, Bella," Jasper smiled. "So, if we can't talk about...my brother...then, how about you tell me what you've been up to all these years?"

I shrugged my shoulders, walking to sit on a barstool beside where Alice was still sitting cross-legged on the granite.

"Oh, you know," I said, "just traveling around mostly."

"Bella," Jasper said, reaching over to squeeze my hand, "won't you tell us what happened?"

Gently, I pulled my hand from beneath his, my eyes burning, smiling weakly, "Don't try and use your special brand of persuasion on me, Mister Hale."

I didn't truly think he was using his gift on me, I knew he was genuinely curious and concerned. But I also wouldn't put it past him to try and slip me a mental truth serum either.

Jasper held both hands up, "No mood control here. I'm just curious, that's all. If you don't want to talk about it..."

"It isn't what you all think," I said quietly, wringing my hands in my lap, wanting to answer, but at the same time not.

"Which is?" Alice prodded.

"That I sought it out," I said, feeling the lump start to form in my throat at the very idea of discussing my ordeal with them. "I know you must think I did, but I didn't...I was...kidnapped." The last word came out more in a breath than in actual sound.

The gasp that escaped Alice's lips was so loud, I jumped in my seat. She felt along the countertop for me and placed her tiny hand on my shoulder.

"Oh, Bella," she sighed, her voice strained, "how? From where? By whom?"

"Alice," Jasper said cautiously.

"It's Okay, Jasper," I said, taking a deep breath, "I just...don't remember all the details, you know? It's kind of hazy...until I woke up, that is." I stood and walked over to look out of the window above the sink. Holding on to the edge of the granite, I closed my eyes. "I was in a hotel in Vancouver," I said. "One minute I was climbing into bed, then the next I was chained to a pipe in an abandoned warehouse..." I sighed, "I've never actually told the story before."

"Ever?" Alice asked, sounding slightly surprised.

"Never," I said, turning back to them. "Who would I tell? It's not like anyone ever cared before."

"You know what?" Alice said, changing her tone and with it the entire atmosphere in the room. "I'd like to go into the living room, I think. Bella, will you help me down?"

"Uh, sure," I stammered, unsure of her motive, but thankful for the shift. I held onto Alice's hands and pulled her from the counter, leading her towards the door.

Just then, Carlisle strode through the kitchen. His face was blank, but he walked with purpose, towards the back door. Jasper nodded to me, towards the living room, and I guided Alice out as he went to speak with Carlisle.

Once we were comfortable on the sofa, Alice said, "I'm sorry about that. We shouldn't have asked you. When you're ready to tell us, you will."

"I will," I said. "I promise."

Then, a strange sensation came over me, prickling at my skin and sending a chill through my icy veins. It was almost expectation, almost fear, the feeling that something wasn't right. I briefly wondered if it was akin to what Alice felt just before a vision. I leaned over the sofa back to look into the kitchen, seeing Jasper and Carlisle huddled in the center of the room. They were whispering, too fast and too low for even Alice, or I to catch what they were saying. I knew something was definitely amiss, and stood, creeping closer. Carlisle turned and headed out the back door, and Jasper turned to me.

"Hey, Bella," he said, a little too calmly for my liking.

"What was that about?" I asked him.

"Nothing," he shrugged.

"Where is Carlisle going?" I asked, pointing at the door.

"Just out for a walk," Jasper answered, not meeting my eyes. "He's worried about Alice is all, needs to think about the situation."

I watched him closely, until he finally looked me in the eyes.

"Jasper?" I asked, raising one eyebrow at him.

"Come on, Bella," he said, "let's go into the living room with Alice."

"Alright," I said. Jasper turned to walk away, but I took a step in the opposite direction. Watching Jasper, I felt behind me for the door knob and slowly turned it, inching the door open to slip outside. I thought for a moment I heard voices in the yard, but I was so focused on not getting caught by Jasper, it was hard to tell. The door didn't open all the way as I pushed it out, something was blocking it. I almost stumbled, but Carlisle was standing there, and he reached out to stop me.

"Thank you," I said. "What's all the..."

As I turned to face Carlisle, I realized I indeed heard voices before, and I scanned the edge of the yard quickly. Esme...Emmett...Rosalie...No!

"Oh!" I heard myself gasp, one hand flying to my chest while the other grappled for support on Carlisle's arm. I looked out again, slower this time, and forced my brain to process what I was seeing.

They all stood stone still, watching me watching them. I looked at each of their faces staring at me, all in varying states of wonder. Esme, a small smile on her lips, Emmett, grinning over his shoulder at me like a kid on Christmas morning, and Rosalie, shock and disbelief etched on her beautiful features, and behind them slightly, held back by Emmett, staring blankly and frozen, yet vibrating energy – was Edward.

His eyes squeezed shut, and he rubbed at them, only to open them again and stare some more. I stared back.

_Edward. _God, it felt strangely wonderful to say his name, even in my head. For the briefest of moments, I was overcome with joy seeing him again. All the hurt and anger fled for a split second, and all I wanted was to look at him, touch him, hear him say my name. I thought my heart might burst right from my chest, until he blinked again, staring at me once more with a strange, bewildered, disbelieving expression. Anger spread anew. Memories of the night he left me clouded my vision. I could feel the bracken beneath my feet, moisture seeping into my clothes as I searched for him, calling out his name - all in vain.

_Look at me! See me! No more helpless, fragile, human Bella. _

I didn't mean to, but I found myself leaping off the porch and storming across the yard. I was appalled and angry, so very angry, at his presence. Did he _never _know when to leave well enough alone? I blinked and was inches from his face, which was distorted with shock and what I could only perceive as revulsion. I growled at him, narrowing my eyes and hoping he was getting the message as I bared my teeth. Barriers, in the form of Carlisle and Emmett, kept me from getting any closer.

Vaguely, I registered the feel of a soft touch on my arm, and through the fog of my rage, thought I heard Esme whisper, "Bella, dear."

I glanced to my left and felt my ire slip momentarily. She was looking at me with such adoration. I almost wanted to fall into her arms, just as I had Carlisle's. My attention quickly shifted back to the man in front of me, my anger firmly back in place. I seethed and growled low again, forcing myself not to breathe him in, not to take in the scent that would surely be my downfall. A wave of calm embraced me, just as an arm slipped gently around my waist.

"Bella," Jasper whispered in my ear. "Listen to me, sweetheart. You need to come back inside, okay?"

At first, I wasn't having it, and fought against his hold on my body as well as my mind. Carlisle let his grip on me lessen and Emmett released me entirely, turning his full weight on Edward.

"Bella, please," Jasper whispered again. "It's alright. I just need you to come inside. Will you do that for me? Will you come inside? I won't let him in, I swear, not until you're ready."

Jasper took a step backwards toward the house, pulling me along with him. I was gripping his arms encircling me, no longer to get away, but to hold myself in place against him.

"Good girl," Jasper whispered as I took each step with him. "Would you like Esme to come in with us? I know she'd love to sit with you a while."

I was about to nod my head when he growled it.

"Mine."

Jasper's spell was broken as I laughed, loud and shrill and crazed, "Mine?"

"Bella, come on," I heard Jasper in my ear again.

Wrenching my entire body weight against him, I broke free, stalking across the ten feet that separated us.

"Yours?" I cried, my voice sounding caustic even to me. "How dare you?"

I never expected his reaction. He held up his hands and winced at the sound of my voice. Stopping halfway to him, I leaned back on my heels and stared at him, incensed.

How dare he say that? His? Was he insane? And how dare he recoil from me, as though I were some kind of monster, as if leaving me wasn't bad enough. As if it didn't kill me in its own way. Now he had the audacity to stand before me and look so obviously disgusted. Did he not understand what he was seeing in front of him now was _his _fault? He might not have been the one to change me, but the fact I was a vampire was his doing all the same.

Five years worth of pent up aggression came barreling out of me in full force. Every emotion I had kept buried deep inside, rushed out like a tidal wave; every unshed tear, every curse, and each waking nightmare. My fists balled at my sides and I leapt forward, past the others, and punched him with all my might.

I screamed as he flew through the trees and landed on his back, ignoring the pleas of those around me to calm down. In an instant, I was sitting on his chest, pounding away, wild and out of control.

"How dare you?" I screamed again. "I hate you! I hate you!"

My hands made contact with his marble chest over and over again.

"I...," a punch to the ribs, "hate...," another one to the stomach.

He closed his eyes, but made no move against me, said nothing in defense. Taking his reticence as further proof he still wanted nothing to do with me, despite his claim-staking slip of the tongue, I slapped him hard across the face.

"You!"

I vaulted over him, landing just above his head. I charged into the dense forest, running as hard and as fast as I could, and never looking back. My sobs subsided as I ran aimlessly away, and I couldn't help the sense of vindication I felt knowing this time, it was Edward who was left beaten down and broken on the forest floor.

* * *

**End Notes: And there you have it! The big moment from Bella's side...what do we think of how she interpreted Edward's behavior? Hit that pretty little button down there, and I'll send you a teaser of Chapter 13! :)**

**Don't forget to go to my profile and see the banner! :)**

**~CBx**


	13. Chapter 13 Running AwayAnd Back Again

**A/N: So...I've been feeling a little strange about this story, like something wasn't right. And just now, I figured out what it was... I promised everyone who reviewed Chapter 12, a peek at Chapter 13...only I sent you all a peek at Chapter FOURTEEN instead! LOL **

**Since it's Thanksgiving Day here, and I'm feeling especially grateful for ALL of you tonight - reviewers and lurkers alike...you're getting Chapter 13 a little earlier than planned! Sorry for the teaser screw up... *face palm***

**Many, many, many thanks to the wonderful and fabulous Claire Bloom, who graces me with her extreme Beta talents! I adore you, hard core, babe! xxx**

**To all the amazing ladies at the FB FFA... the camaraderie in that place is beyond anything I ever imagined, and I love, love, love hanging out with y'all! Thank you for the pictures, the laughs, the encouragement and everything else! Sky and BabyPups... you rock my world, dearies!**

**SM still owns... I'm just pretending NM had gone a little differently... :)  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ **

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN- Running Away...And Back Again**

"**There is part of me that wants an answer,**

**Part of me that doesn't want to know.**

**Part of you that I am in love with,**

**And part that I am willing to let go…"**

_**Latest Mistake, Mandy Moore**_

**(Quotes in Bella's memory are taken from **_**Twilight**_**, pages 19, 22 and 42)**

**Bella**

I ran, anger coursing through my veins, seething in twisted, gnarly growls from deep within my chest.

_Why did I come back here?_

_Why did I talk to Alice?_

_Why didn't she just go home when I told her to?_

If Alice had left straight from the cemetery that first day, none of this would have been happening. I wouldn't still be here. I could have said goodbye to Charlie and headed off towards another solo adventure, exploring rain forests or trekking up Mount Kilimanjaro. I wouldn't be stuck here, with Alice disabled and the entire Cullen clan coming to catch a peek at Bella the Vampire Girl. I wouldn't be running in circles around Forks. And I wouldn't be...feeling.

The pressure in my chest was getting stronger, thicker, and less manageable. I wanted to cry, hard, rough, gut wrenching sobs. I wanted to hit things, kick things, destroy things, and beat things up until they were no longer recognizable.

Okay, so I really only wanted to do those things to Edward.

Cursing the emotional energy cascading through my entire body, I continued to run.

_Why did he come? _

He hadn't known about me, the new me, I could tell by his reaction. He was shocked, clearly, and apparently revolted. Why would he travel so far just to throw in my face once again how unworthy he found me? He didn't want me human, and he'd _never _wanted me changed. What purpose did it serve to come all the way across the country to emphasize the point with his freak out? It was as though he ripped my heart out and crushed it all over again, with just one contorted look. And my heart, though cold and still, couldn't take it. Not again.

I never really had any idea what seeing him again would be like. The truth was I had tried so hard not to envision the scenario at all, but if I could have planned it, or even known it was coming, perhaps - maybe I could have been ready.

And what the hell was all that "Mine!" bullshit?

_Moody bastard! 'I'm leaving you. No, wait...Mine!' It was simply unacceptable. _

I wondered for a moment if Alice had ever had some glimpse, however faulty, and known they were coming. Her mood in the kitchen had changed so drastically, so quickly. Surely, if she'd seen anything, she would have warned me...wouldn't she?

Hearing the soft footfalls of deer, I stopped running and crouched behind a large tree. My emotions were all over the place, and I needed to focus. I watched, waiting for the creatures to get close enough. There were two. Leaping out from my hiding place, I snapped their necks in quick succession, and drained them completely. After I dropped the carcasses under a boulder, I sat on the ground, and tried to regain my bearings.

I was on the other side of Forks, close to the La Push Reservation. I considered, for a moment, going to see Jacob. If anyone could help me make sense of the chaos I had rattling around inside me, it would be him. The more I thought about it, though, the more I doubted Jacob, with his inherent hatred of all things Edward, would be too keen on making me feel better about the situation. Besides, I really just wanted to be alone.

Standing up, I brushed off my jeans and walked slowly back towards town. I contemplated going back to the hotel in Port Angeles. Then, I remembered all of my belongings, including my car and hotel key, were at the Cullens' house. Sure, I could go back and get them, but not without everyone knowing. The sun was setting, so I just walked, towards no destination in particular. Keeping to the alleyways behind the small business district, I strolled along the city's edge. I found myself in front of the high school again, and before I could stop my feet, my eyes were looking through the window of the cafeteria.

Tables filled the room, the chairs sitting on top in neat stacks. The lights were off, save the one in back, the stream of light illuminating the room in an eerie glow. I attempted to recreate in my mind what the room must have looked like on that fateful day six years prior, the first time I'd ever lay eyes on Edward Cullen. Memories had come flooding back at the sound of Carlisle's voice so perhaps being in this place would bring some more.

I knew I was speculating, since the actual memory was fuzzy, but if I concentrated, I could see me, sitting at the table in the middle of the room. Jessica Stanley and Angela Weber had surely been there with me. All around us, I assumed, sat other students, eating and talking and cramming in forgotten homework. I closed my eyes and tried to pull from the deep, dark corners of my brain, the memory.

"_Who are __**they**__?" _

The question rang so loudly in my head it was as if someone was standing beside me, asking me. I started at the detail, then, closing my eyes once more, endeavored to find another fragment.

"_Which one is the boy with the reddish brown hair?"_

Opening my eyes, I could almost see them, sitting at their table, pretending to eat lunch, looking everywhere and nowhere at once.

"_That's Edward...don't waste your time..." _

I recalled how strangely Edward had looked at me, confused and startled. I knew now it was because he was discovering my mind was blocked to him, and I wondered if that particular quirk existed still.

A later memory rushed through...

"_Edward Cullen is staring at you..."_

I backed away from the window, shaking my head and pulling at my hair. These were the memories I didn't want, the ones from the beginning, when I was full of hope and expectation. They were the ones that would certainly hurt the most. I refused to let myself feel such despair again, even for one second. Not for him or what he did to me.

Walking back out onto the sidewalk, I thought of one place where I could hide out for a while. Silently, I made my way through the streets, until I was standing in front of Charlie's house.

_The Henrys' house._

Slipping around the side, I noticed the tree-house was still intact, and appeared sturdy. Standing underneath the opening in the floor, the long rotted rope ladder gone, I leapt up and grabbed the floorboard, easily pulling myself through. The cramped space wasn't very comfortable for I had grown quite a bit taller since the last time I had been inside. But I lay down on my back, resting my head on my arm, and stared through the slat in the roof, deliberately placed there for star gazing. Clouds were rolling in, and I suspected rain would be falling before morning.

As I contemplated everything which had transpired over the previous days, I felt more sadness envelope me. How I wanted to go back to the house, to see Esme and Emmett, to check on Alice. I even wanted to talk to Rosalie, mainly to find out what it was about me that she always disliked so strongly. The fact Edward would be there, though, made the idea sour. I had no desire to speak to him, see him at all, not if he were going to be so ill-mannered. I supposed I had been rather ill-mannered myself, lashing out at him the way I had, but I felt justified in my reaction.

Hours passed, and I wondered if any of them were looking for me. Did they wonder where I had gone? Did they even want me to return? Carlisle and Jasper had seemed truly happy to see me again, as I was them. And Esme, sweet Esme, had tried her hand at calming me with her motherly ways. I felt instantly guilty for the way I'd ignored her, she always treated me with such love and affection. But I had been so blinded by anger, and I couldn't see past Edward.

"I knew you'd come back," the whispered words sent me flying into a crouch, a low growl escaping my lips. For an instant, I saw red, my defenses clamping into place, and I sought out the source of the words.

"How did you get up there anyway?" The voice came, a little louder, from down below.

Peeking over the edge of the floor opening, I saw Ashley Henry staring up at the tree-house, smiling.

_Jesus, how did I get snuck up on by a thirteen-year-old girl?_

"Ashley?" I called quietly.

"Yep," she nodded. "So, how did you get up there?" she asked again.

"Climbed through the floor," I said. "What are you doing? How did you know I was out here?"

She shrugged her thin shoulders and smiled. "Just knew," she said. She reached up with both hands and asked, "Help me up?"

I sat back on my heels, knowing it was a bad plan. However, I lay on my stomach and reached my hands down towards hers. She clasped tightly, and I pulled her up into the tree-house with me.

Ashley was dressed in orange flannel pajama pants with, of all things, black bats on them, their wings outstretched and little white fangs protruding from their mouths. Her t-shirt was black, and in the middle of the chest the words 'I'm a total witch' were emblazoned in tiny white jewels. She had on a pair of black Uggs, her hair braided and slung over one shoulder, tied with an orange piece of corded yarn.

"Jeez, your hands are cold," she muttered, rubbing her small palms against her pants.

Sitting back against the opposite wall, I nodded at her outfit and said, "You know, Halloween isn't for another six weeks."

"I know," she giggled, "but for me, it's Halloween all year round."

"Hmm," I said. "Into the witchy stuff, are you?" I had no idea why I was asking such inane questions of the girl, just that I wanted to know how she knew I was there.

"Oh yeah," she beamed at me. "Witches, ghosts, shapeshifters..," she shrugged again, wiggling her eyebrows, "you know, all that stuff."

_Shapeshifters, eh? _

"You...believe...in that sort of thing?" I asked cautiously.

"Please," she scoffed. "You're kidding me, right? I mean, after all..." she waved her hand at me.

"What?" I asked, "What makes you think I'm into that kind of stuff."

"Because," she said. "First of all, look at you."

I glanced down at myself, seeing my outfit as she must have perceived it. My jeans were black, and my long sleeved, black t-shirt was layered with a grey tank underneath. My hair was straightened, hanging in planks over my shoulders, and my chunky boots were leather, as was the plaited bracelet on my right wrist.

"I knew the wholesome look you had going on the other day was an act," Ashley laughed. "Plus, I found your book."

"My book?" I asked, seriously concerned about where she was taking the conversation.

"Yes, your book," she sighed. "God, sometimes grownups are so obtuse! The book you hid in the bottom of your closet. I didn't pull it out the other day because my mom interrupted us, and she would have totally freaked out."

I couldn't tell Ashley why I didn't remember what book she was talking about. Books littered my room in that house, closet included, there was no way I could possibly recall every single...

_Oh, no... Not __**that **__book..._

"Ashley," I asked, "would you go and get this book for me? I'm having a little trouble remembering which one you mean."

"Sure," she smiled. "Be right back." She held her hand out to me as she needed me to let her down. When she was safely on the ground, she ran to the house, quietly opening the screen door and slipping inside. I watched as a dim light came on in her room then went back out again. In seconds, it seemed, she was back at the base of the tree, a bag draped across her body. "Help me back up," she whispered.

Once she was back inside, Ashley pulled a large volume from the bag and passed it to me.

"Seriously," she rolled her eyes at me, "like you'd forget something like this."

I took it from her, careful not to touch her again. I hadn't seen it in years. I remembered purchasing it at the little shop in Port Angeles. That book had held answers for me. The stories and illustrations in it had brought me to the conclusion Jacob Black's tribal stories had to be real, no matter what he'd said. That book had put before me the very truths no one wanted to believe, the truths that divided my life into 'before' and 'after'.

"This...was in my closet?" I asked, gingerly running my fingers over the leather cover.

"Mmmhmm," she nodded. "I was so excited when I found it. There's so much cool stuff in there."

"Cool," I chuckled. _Like me, _I thought.

Ashley scooted closer to me and took the book, placing it in her lap. She flipped through the pages, and smiled when she found what she was looking for.

"This part," she pointed, "is my favorite." She turned the book and held it out for me to see.

Grisly drawings of monsters, with oddly shaped heads and sharp, pointy teeth, maiming and defiling innocent women and children glared back at me. Scrawled across the top of the illustration were three words - The Cold Ones.

"This is your favorite part?" I asked. "It's kind of macabre for a girl your age."

"Maybe," she said. "I just think it's cool you know. The idea this stuff is real, like, really real. You must know what I mean. I did find this in your room."

"I was young," I protested, closing the book and placing it on the other side of my leg. "These...they're just scary stories."

"Uh huh," she said, "whatever you say."

"Ashley," I said, hoping to change the subject, "how exactly did you know I was in here? And what did you mean when you said you knew I'd come back?"

After all I had seen in this world, I didn't entirely dismiss the idea of the girl having some kind of untapped power. I just needed to find out if she believed in it, or if she was just goofing around.

"I don't know," she said, suddenly less bubbly than before. "It's just something I...do...sometimes...know what's coming, I mean. I was a little surprised when you showed up at the house the other day, though. As much time as I spend with the stuff you left behind, and wearing your clothes, I kind of think I should have..." She flipped her braid over her shoulder and sat up a little straighter. "God, you must think I'm some insane little brat, ranting about all this. I'm not crazy, I swear!"

"I know you're not crazy," I said, patting her knee. "You're just...does it happen a lot? The knowing what's coming thing?" I imagined for a minute what it must have been like for Alice when she was human, living with a gift everyone feared. In her day, she had been locked up in an asylum, labeled insane, abandoned and alone. I shuddered to think what could happen to the girl in front of me if she actually had a psychic ability.

"Sometimes," she said, "it's little things mostly, like knowing what roads my mom should take to avoid traffic, or what my dad will get me for Christmas. There was this one time, though...nevermind," she shook her head, "I was really little, and my mother doesn't like for me to talk about it."

"What is it?" I asked, honestly curious. "You can tell me."

Ashley took a deep breath and sat back on her hands. "When I was eight," she began, "my cousin went missing. He was only eighteen, and he just disappeared. One minute he was leaving his friends after studying for finals, and the next he was just...gone. I had a dream the night it happened. I woke up screaming, vivid images of him in my head. I saw him attacked by something, but I couldn't tell what it was. It rushed by him in a flash. He was on his knees, crying out in pain. I kept telling my mother something terrible had happened to him, but she didn't believe me, even after she got the call from my aunt saying he was missing. She made me swear never to tell my aunt, or anyone else, about the dream. She said it would only make things worse."

"Did they ever find him?" I asked, intrigued.

"No," she shook her head slowly. "I've seen him, though. Not actually, but in my dreams. He always looks lonely...and cold. And the dreams, they feel so real."

Could it be? Could this girl have a latent power? And her description of her cousin's attack - is it possible she'd seen him changed? I wondered what Carlisle would think about the story Ashley had just told me. Perhaps, if she remembered something else, or gave us more details...

_What good would that do? What would you say to her? 'You're not crazy, sweetie. You just saw your cousin being turned into a vampire'?_

Ashley took my silence as a sign I thought she was insane, or worse, lying.

"I shouldn't have told you that," she said. "Now you must really think I'm nuts, but it's true, I swear."

"I don't think you're nuts," I said, "not at all. In fact, I believe everything you said."

Ashley smiled at me, "Really?" I nodded in confirmation. "Seriously? I mean, you really believe me?" I nodded again, smiling back at her. "Wow. No one ever believes me."

"I have a friend," I said, "who can...see things the way you do."

"So you _are_ into all the witchy stuff?" she asked, sounding hopeful, as though she'd found a kindred spirit.

"I don't know from witches," I said. "Supernatural might be a better term."

"Call it what you want," she said.

I heard a noise from inside the house, and listened. Someone was getting a drink of water in the kitchen.

"Ashley," I whispered, "I think you'd better get back inside. Someone's awake in there."

She turned to look at the house, and seeing no lights on, turned back to me confused. "How do you know that?" she asked.

"Trust me," I said. "Now, come on. I'll help you down."

Ashley grabbed her bag and slung it over her shoulder, sliding near the hole in the floor. I took her by the wrists and lowered her to the ground.

"Why are your hands so cold?" she asked.

"Poor circulation," I answered, the well practiced response flowing quickly out of my mouth, and set her feet firmly on the grass.

"Uh huh," she laughed, arching an eyebrow and flipping her braid. "I'll see you round, Bella."

"We'll see about that," I said. "Goodnight, Ashley."

The girl winked at me before running towards the back door and disappearing inside.

When the sky began to lighten, I climbed down from the tree-house and headed back into the woods. My plan was to call Carlisle and tell him I was coming to get my car. They'd hear me outside, and I wasn't in the mood for anymore confrontations.

I dialed, and waited for him to answer.

"Bella," I heard Esme's voice instead. "Where are you, dear?"

"Esme," I said, surprised. "I'm in town. I'd like to come by the house and get my car, if that's okay."

"Why, of course," she said. "Though, I do wish you would just come back."

"I don't think I can do that," I said. She sighed, and I could hear the disappointment in her voice. "It's not that I don't want to see you, Esme, because I do, but...I just don't think I can..."

"I understand," she said.

"Would you please go into Alice's room and get my things for me?" I asked. "Everything is in a duffle bag on the bed."

"Of course," she said. "I'll be waiting for you, and I'll meet you outside. Would that be alright?"

"Certainly," I said. "I'll be there in five minutes."

I ended the call and headed towards the house. The closer I got, the more nervous I became. I was so afraid Edward would make an attempt to see me, to gape at me some more, and I didn't know if my emotions could handle any more of his contempt. For once, he didn't disappoint.

When I arrived at the driveway, I heard Esme saying, "No, Edward. You will stay in the house. She doesn't want to see you."

His muffled growl was almost funny to me.

"I mean it," Esme said, more forcefully than I had ever heard her speak. "That girl has been hurt far too much by this family already. I will not allow you to make this any harder on her than it already is."

I heard a scuffle, then Emmett's voice, "No worries, Mom. I'll just sit on him."

_Emmett, you're my new best friend._

The image of Edward trapped on the floor underneath Emmett's bulky frame made me smile. For once, he would be the one feeling helpless and confined, while the one person he wanted to see the most was impossible to reach.

The front door opened just enough for Esme to slip out with my bag. She spotted me walking up the drive and smiled. I stopped next to my car and waited for her to come closer.

"Hi," I said.

Esme dropped my bag by the hood and held her arms out to me. I stepped forward and hugged her, taking in a deep breath. She smelled like gardenias, the scent so much stronger than I ever imagined it could be, in all of my memories of her.

"Bella," she said softly, "let me look at you." She grasped my shoulders and held me at arm's length, appraising me in much the same way as Carlisle had when he'd first arrived. "You are as beautiful as ever," she smiled. Placing her palm against my cheek, she asked, "Are you alright, dear? I know we surprised you yesterday, and I'm sorry about that."

"It's okay," I said, leaning into her hand. "I'm sorry I freaked out. It was very rude to the rest of you."

"Never mind the rest of us," she said, "but I do wish you would at least consider talking to Edward. It might be good for you."

I sighed, closing my eyes and rolling my neck, "I know you do. I'm just not ready. Please understand." Esme nodded, looking briefly towards the house. "How is Alice today?" I asked.

"No change, I'm afraid," she answered. "She still can't see very well, and this morning, she tripped over one of Rosalie's stilettos in the hallway." I could tell she was suppressing a giggle at the memory.

"It isn't funny!" Alice shrieked from inside.

I laughed, unable to stop myself, and called back, "Sorry, Alice!"

"Carlisle thinks he'll need to speak with the wolves soon." Esme continued. "He was hoping you might be willing to help set up a meeting, since you and Jacob Black are friends."

"I could do that," I agreed. "I'll do whatever I can to help Alice."

"Then come inside!" Alice called.

"Quit eavesdropping!" I yelled.

"It's the one thing I've got left, my hearing!" she retorted, whining.

I rolled my eyes and picked up my bag. "I'm leaving now," I said loudly, an announcement to the entire house. A grumbling, followed by a growl that shook the window panes, emanated from inside.

"Bye, Bells!" Emmett called, his voice sounding strained.

There was another scuffling noise and a guttural moan from Emmett, just before the front door swung open. Edward lurched through the opening, Emmett and Jasper fast on his heels, grabbing at his arms.

Edward froze in the doorway and said through clenched teeth, "I just want to see her." He looked out towards me and whispered, "Please, don't leave."

I couldn't move. My brain was frantically ordering my body into motion, but my feet were planted firmly in their spot. My heart ached, and the all too familiar pang tightened inside my chest. The day before, I had been so shocked, so angry I hadn't actually looked at Edward. Now, standing on the porch, held in place by his brothers, staring at me, pleading with me not to leave, he looked so...painfully beautiful. I did what I had been unable to do before, and forced my eyes to fully take him in.

His hair looked the same, only brighter now, flecks of gold and copper shining in the brown, disheveled tresses. His face, so perfect in my memory, was even more flawless; angled nose, defined cheekbones, lips pressed together in an immaculate line. And his eyes, unparalleled by anything I had ever seen when human, were piercing amber orbs, their depth and intensity cutting through me like a sword.

My hands were shaking, itching to reach out to him, to ease his obvious discomfort.

_Stop it! You have nothing to say to him. He doesn't deserve your empathy._

My eyes burned, my fragile walls begging to crumble, as he stared at me and whispered again, "Please, Bella."

_Please. How many times did I beg him, please? _

Shaking my head, clearing it, regaining my composure, I snapped, "No, Edward. I've said all I have to say to you, right now."

"Bella..." Edward fought against Emmett and Jasper.

"Let her go," Jasper said.

Alice had made her way into the mix, and she shoved past her brothers onto the porch.

"Bella," she said sweetly, "please stay."

I glanced at Esme, who was looking at me with the same pleading, doe eyes as Alice. My eyes sought out the porch once again. I could see similar expressions being thrown my way by Jasper and Emmett. Rosalie appeared in the living room window, her arms crossed over her chest, glaring out at me with the same obvious dislike she had always shown me. For a moment, I considered staying, just to piss her off.

I wondered if it would be possible to go back into the house and still avoid Edward. Looking back at him, I noticed the ever-present dazed and confused expression on his face.

"What?" I asked, dropping my bag and throwing my hands in the air. "Why are you looking at me like that? And please tell me why you believe I would even _think_ about staying here, when you keep looking at me like that? I don't need your pity or your contempt right now, Edward!" I turned away from all of them and paced beside my car. "All I wanted to do here was say goodbye to Charlie," I mused. "I didn't want this, didn't expect all of you to come flying back here to gawk at me, feel sorry for me, or tell me once again how unworthy I am to be in your family!" I pulled at my hair, flipping it over my shoulder and taking a deep breath.

"It isn't you who is unworthy," Rosalie's voice pierced through my monologue. I spun around to find her standing on the bottom step, glaring up at Edward. "It's him," she said, pointing a perfectly manicured finger at him. "He's the one who screwed this family up."

"Rosalie," Esme cautioned.

"No," Rosalie said to her mother. "It's Edward's fault we had to leave here - not hers, not Jaspers, Edward's. And its Edward's fault Bella thinks none of us ever cared about her, his fault she's such a confused mess right now!" She turned to face me, taking a few tentative steps in my direction. "Bella, my brother is many things," she said, her voice dropping to a more friendly level, "but the short list consists of him being a moody control freak. If something doesn't go his way, he throws a tantrum like a three-year-old and runs away. As for me, I'm sick of it. If staying here is what you want to do, for Alice, then stay. You don't have to talk to him, or even look at him, if you don't want to. You can beat the shit out of him again for all I care. Lord knows, he deserves it. But if you can help Carlisle with the wolves, help us figure out what's going on with Alice...then I wish you would stay."

_Wow. Rosalie Hale just went to bat for me? Who knew?_

"Besides," she added, "all Emmett can talk about is how badly he wants to arm wrestle with you, and it's getting on my nerves."

_Aaaand...she's back!_

"Fine," I sighed, earning a genuine smile from Esme and a giggle from Alice. Picking my bag up, I stalked up the steps, stopping on the porch just in front of Edward. "But you don't talk to me," I said, my face inches from his, my eyes narrowed into a hardened stare. "And stop looking at me like that."

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	14. Chapter 14 Bodyguards

**A/N: So, here we are again... THANK YOU to all of you who have put this on alert/faves! THANK YOU to those of you who constantly review! Mezz, you rock my world with every theory! :) **

**To This Guilty Blood over at the Facebook FFA- I can't not thank you enough for making this story the first in what I'm sure will be a long line of amazing company on the FFA Blog's Monthly Spotlight! I am still over the moon excited you chose Home for the inaugural fic! For anyone who doesn't read this blog, I've put a link on my profile! You should totally check it out! :)**

**Claire Bloom, babe, you are AMAZING! Thank you for your constant hand holding and guidance! I'm the luckiest author in the world to have you! xoxo**

**As always...Stephenie Meyer owns ALL things Twilight! I make nothing, I claim nothing. I'm just a girl who likes to play dress up! Thank you, SM, for allowing us to play in your toy box! :)  
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**CHAPTER FOURTEEN- Bodyguards**

"**...this is a delicate unravelling..."**

_**Latest Mistake, Mandy Moore**_

**Edward**

Two days.

Forty-eight hours.

They seemed to last longer than the past five years.

For two days, Bella followed Alice around the house, catering to her every whim. If Alice wanted to go somewhere, Bella took her. If she needed anything, Bella retrieved it for her. No one else was allowed near either of them. They were like some kind of fucked up conjoined twins.

Not that I could talk, Emmett was stuck to me like a rock star's groupie. He was around every corner, watching my every move. If it seemed I was even considering opening my mouth to speak in Bella's presence, he'd punch me. Of course, being in Bella's presence wasn't a common occurrence. When I walked into a room, she would immediately exit. If she walked in, and I was already there, she would turn on her heel. I had tried, countless times, to get a read on her. I only wanted to know if the entirety of her anger was real, or if she were just punishing me in some way. Part of me hoped it was the latter, for if it was flippant vengeance she sought, perhaps I hadn't completely destroyed her after all. However, another part of me, the part that loved her just as much as the day I'd left her, wished for her fury to be as real as the ache residing in my chest. If it were the case, if her outrage was as raw and fervent as it seemed, she must, in some way still love me.

That singular hope is what kept me in the house.

If she still had feelings for me, after all this time, whatever they were, maybe there was a chance for me...for us.

Alas, Bella's mind was as closed to me as the day I'd met her. I had to settle for what little I could overhear of her conversations with the others. And she wasn't giving much away. The only stories she told were of grand adventures - places she'd traveled, sights she'd seen. With each retelling of how wonderful and beautiful, and awe-inspiring Europe had been, I felt sick knowing I had not been there to experience it with her. When she told Emmett about taking out her first grizzly, I felt guilty for taking away his chance to watch her do it. Bella even talked with Rosalie, going on for hours about shopping in Milan. While that wasn't an adventure I particularly wished I had been on, it was the way she talked with my sister about it that tugged at my heart.

Bella had changed, in more than the obvious ways. No longer shy and reserved, this Bella had conquered the world all on her own. She left out, however, any mention of exactly when or how she had come to be like us. I got the feeling she had given away some inkling to Jasper and Alice, as they kept any conversation flowing so she didn't have to talk about it.

Alice wasn't getting any better, though she wasn't getting any worse either. Carlisle had exhausted every available outlet, trying to figure out what was going on, but had come up empty handed. He decided the next best course of action was a sit-down with the wolves. So far, Bella had called Jacob Black eight times, but for some reason, he wasn't answering.

I overheard her venting her frustration to Carlisle in his study. "I don't understand," she said. She was pacing the floor, gripping her phone in one hand and twisting her hair with the other. "I've left him voice mails, text messages...,"

Seeing Bella so passionate about helping Alice warmed my cold heart in a way it hadn't been in five years. Just being in her presence, in spite of the fact she was ignoring me, was bringing about feelings I had long believed I would never have again. I couldn't get over how incredible she looked as a vampire. To say she was beautiful would have been the understatement of a lifetime. She was exquisite - magnificently graceful and utterly beguiling. Her eyes, though no longer the deep brown I remembered, shone with a golden shrewdness emanating straight from the depths of her heart. I could hardly believe I hadn't wanted this life for her. It seemed to suit her better than I could ever have imagined.

"Surely Jacob has a life outside of his tribal duties," Carlisle said. "And, he has no idea we are here. I'm sure he'll return your call soon enough."

"It just isn't like him," Bella countered. "I know I don't remember much about my human life, but I remember Jacob, and he never ignored me. He was always there for me when I needed him, always ready to help, always. From the night they found me in the woods...," she paused and took a deep breath. "Jacob saved me, Carlisle, when...,"

"When we left you," he finished for her.

"Yes," she sighed. "He picked me up, helped me put the pieces of my life back together. I never would have made it through without him. He was...everything to me."

My insides felt like they were dissolving into flames as I thought about Jacob Black helping Bella through my absence. My hands involuntarily balled into fists, and I fought the urge to growl, through clenched teeth. I hadn't known Jacob very well, but I hadn't needed my gift to know how he felt about Bella. The very idea she could have somehow reciprocated his feelings made me sick to my stomach. I couldn't listen to her wax poetically about how important Jacob was to her. Thankfully, Carlisle took the conversation to a different place.

"You seem to have retained some clear memories," he noted.

Bella was quiet for a moment before she answered. "I have," she said quietly. "I don't understand it, but the clearest memories I have are all of Jacob...or Edward. I'm beginning to think it's because of the insane amount of human emotions I seemed to have retained, as well."

_...or Edward?_

Knowing she had clear human memories of me gave me some solace. I could only hope not all of them were of the time after I had left her.

"Insane amount of human emotions?" Carlisle questioned.

"Yeah," she said. "It's kind of like your compassion, or Esme's maternal way, I suppose. I _feel _things, just like when I was human. It isn't like what Jasper can do; I don't read the emotional temperature of others or anything. It's just within me. I get upset, anxious, embarrassed. When Alice left to head home, before she was attacked, I collapsed on the ground again. I was completely, physically paralyzed, Carlisle. The loss engulfed me, just like...last time."

"You only mention the unpleasant emotions, Bella," Carlisle said curiously. "Do you not also feel happier sentiments to the same extent?"

Bella shrugged her shoulders. "I don't guess there's been much occasion for those," she said.

Hearing Bella speak so openly with my father, bought my own unpleasant emotions to the forefront. How I wished she would talk to me, or at least listen, so I could explain my atrocious behavior. If she would only give me a chance to make my case, attempt to justify my actions, perhaps...

Emmett walked up behind me, slapping me loudly on the back of the head and saying, "Eavesdropping now, Eddie?"

Bella turned from where she was standing in the doorway of Carlisle's study and glared at me. "I thought I made it clear you were to stay away from me," she snapped.

"I'm sorry, Bella, I just...," I tried to speak, but was once again interrupted by a punch to the shoulder from Emmett. I wheeled around and connected my fist with his jaw before he could stop me. "God damn it, Emmett!" I shouted. "Will you knock it off?"

"Hey," he laughed, rubbing at his face, "I have orders."

I turned around to try and talk to Bella again, but she was gone. "Where did she go?" I asked Carlisle.

"Edward," he said, in a fatherly tone I was in no mood for.

"This is ridiculous," I said. "She can't ignore me forever."

"Oh, but I think she's having fun trying," Emmett laughed.

"This isn't funny," I snapped. "Can't any of you convince her to at least _listen_ to what I have to say?"

"I'm afraid that will have to be up to Bella," Carlisle said. "She came here to say goodbye to her father, Edward. She wasn't expecting all of this. Bella has had five years to ponder the things you told her. She believed them then, and she still believes them today."

I couldn't argue with Carlisle, he had a point. Whereas I had spent five years knowing the truth, Bella had spent them believing in the lie. I was suddenly afraid too much time may have passed. If she recalled me, and our time together, with the clarity she claimed, the damage may be beyond repair. I walked downstairs to find Alice sitting cross-legged on the sofa, tapping her fingers on the armrest.

"Alice," I said as I walked through the living room.

"Not so fast," she said, hearing rather than seeing me go for the front door.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"Sit down, brother," she commanded in a way only Alice could, "we need to talk."

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0****0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0****0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0****0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

**Bella**

Edward had been lurking about for two days. Every time I turned around, there he was, staring at me with that confused look on his face.

As juvenile as it sounded, part of me wanted to turn around and scream, "Take a picture!"

Alice stuck to me, and I to her, so I was never caught off guard by him. Thankfully, no one asked me any direct questions concerning my transformation. I talked with them about the places I'd visited and the sights I'd seen, careful to avoid any topic that wasn't completely superficial. Someone, and by someone I'm pretty sure I mean Alice, had directed Emmett to punch Edward any time he attempted to speak when I was around. I admit, it was amusing, but there were times I found myself wondering what he wanted to say. The only thing I cared to hear from him was why he always stared at me like I was a mutant. I realized the new me probably took some getting used to, but, God, he just wouldn't quit staring, with that confused expression in his eyes. Sometime in the night, after our confrontation in Carlisle's office, I must have muttered my sentiments aloud because Rosalie laughed lightly behind me.

"What?" I asked, turning to see her standing in the stairwell.

"Nothing," she said. "I just think it funny, that's all." Rosalie walked to stand beside me at the window.

"Funny?" I asked, not so amused. "You find it comical the way he's always studying me like I'm a puzzle? Forgive me if I fail to see the humor, Rose." I wasn't really mad at her, just annoyed at the whole thing.

"No," she said, sighing and gently bumping my shoulder with hers, "that's not what's funny. What's funny is how crazy it makes him that you're still silent to him." Rosalie tapped at her temple, smiling.

"Wha- oh!" I said, realization dawning on me. "He still can't read my mind?" I asked, bending towards her and whispering as though it were a secret and no one would be able to hear me.

"Nope," she said, "and it's got him so wound up, he's about to lose it." She shook her head, laughing again.

"It's probably for the best anyway," I said, pulling at a stray thread which had come loose on the curtains in front of me. "I doubt he'd be all that interested in knowing what I'm thinking when it comes to him."

"Oh, please," I heard Emmett say as he came in from the kitchen, "he'd give his left nut to get inside your head right now!"

"Emmett McCarty Cullen!" Esme called from the living room. "Language!"

"Sorry, Mom," Emmett apologized, winking at me and placing his arms around Rosalie's waist. "But seriously, Bella, you might want to have a little pity on the rest of us and put him out of his misery," he laughed. "I'm getting a little bored punching him every five seconds."

"I'm sorry, Em," I said honestly, patting his shoulder. "God, what have you got in there?" I laughed, playfully slapping his bicep and grinning at the small ping that sounded as my hand made contact.

"What can I say?" Emmett smiled, showing off his picture perfect teeth and dimples, "I was packing some serious heat when that grizzly almost got the better of me."

My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I knew who would be on the line; he was the only person besides Alice who had the number.

"Jacob," I answered, "where the hell have you been?"

"Geez, Bells," Jacob said, "hello to you, too."

"Sorry," I said, "but I've called eight times and sent you a dozen text messages." I smiled politely to Emmett and Rosalie before stepping away and slipping through the front door. "I was starting to worry," I admitted quietly.

"Everything is fine," Jacob said, "I was just out of range for a little while. What's going on? You sounded really upset in your messages."

"It's a couple of things, actually," I said. I was pacing on the front porch, nervous about what his reaction would be to what I had to say. "First, you need to know the Cullens are all in Forks now," I paused, waiting for him to process the information. Not unexpectedly, Jacob's response was less than welcoming.

"When you say 'the Cullens'...," he asked, and I could hear the anger rise in his voice.

"I mean all seven of them," I replied cautiously.

Jacob may have been the one to tell me I should go with Alice, but his feelings towards Edward had never risen above minimum tolerance. Knowing he was back, and in the same place as I, wasn't going to sit well with Jacob. He took several deep breaths, and I listened through the phone as his heart rate quickened, then slowed again.

"What else?" he asked.

"Alice," I said, "she's not getting better. I called Carlisle, and he brought Jasper. The others, well, they showed up later. But that's really not the point. Carlisle would like to set up a meeting with the pack. He needs to know if anything like this has ever happened before. I was hoping you'd help me-"

"You mean help _them_," Jacob cut me off.

Another memory, brought on by the way he practically spit the word _them_, chose that moment to crash into my consciousness.

_Jacob and I at the movie theater..._

"_I know what he did to you, Bella. And I promise, I will never hurt you like that."_

_The two of us on the beach at La Push..._

"_I have to go, Jake. I have to at least try."_

"_He doesn't want you, Bella. He doesn't deserve you. __**I**__ love you. __**I**__ can make you happy. Why can't you see that?"_

I blinked and was back to reality, to Jacob calling my name.

"Did you hear anything I just said?" He was annoyed, and rightly so, I hadn't been listening.

"Look, Jacob," I said. I may not have heard him but still had a pretty good idea what he said. "I know this must open some old grudge for you, believe me. But Alice is my friend, and she's in trouble. All I'm asking is for you to help me help her. Forget about Edward, forget the past. Do this for _me_. Please, Jake."

Jacob was so quiet I could almost hear the synapses in his brain as he worked out his decision. I hoped my plea to our friendship carried the weight I'd intended.

Finally, he spoke, "I'm only doing this for you. And the only way it happens is if it's just you and the Doc, no one else."

"Fine," I agreed.

"I'll call you back," he said, hanging up before I could say thank you.

"I should be there," Edward's voice rang out from behind me.

"Don't you intercept enough _private _information without resorting to eavesdropping?" I asked sarcastically, not bothering to turn around.

"Not when it comes to you," he muttered quietly. "And like it or not, Carlisle will agree with me, Bella. My gift could prove quite useful."

"Well, like it or not, Edward," I retorted, rounding on him, "_I'm _in control of this meeting, not you."

"The wolves can't be trusted," he said, standing in the open doorway, arms crossed, "and we need to be sure what they tell us is the truth."

_Damn him and his stupid internal lie detector._

"It doesn't matter," I snarled. "Jacob said me and Carlisle only. Besides, I'll know if he's lying to me."

"How can you be so certain?" he asked, suddenly seeming less volatile, yet more on edge. He relaxed his arms across his chest and looked at me as though he were waiting for me to have an epiphany.

"Because I know Jacob," I said hotly, "and I know he'll tell me the truth. He may not care for your family, and he may be engineered to hate vampires, but he'll do this _for me_ because it's what I need him to do."

"It's been a long time, Bella," he quipped. "How can you be sure he's the same as you recall? Are you honestly willing to put Alice's well-being on the line here?"

Anger at his accusation flowed through me, and I hissed, "Alice's well-being is my main priority, Edward! You are not going to the meeting, and that...is...final!"

Edward backed away, slowly, and sighed, "Whatever you want, Bella."

I was stunned. Edward Cullen backing down from an argument was nothing I had ever witnessed. I doubted if it had ever happened at all.

"What?" I whispered, unable to find my voice and now the one staring in utter confusion.

"You're right," he said. "Jacob won't allow it if I'm there. Perhaps he would agree to Jasper's presence, though. His gift might be equally as useful as mine."

"Perhaps," I said. My insides were coiled in light of his sudden change of heart. What was his deal? Was he placating me to try and get back in my good graces, or did he truly see my point? "I need to find Carlisle," I said.

"He's still in his study," Edward replied, stepping aside to let me pass.

"Thank you," I mumbled. As I started up the stairs, Edward stopped me with a light touch to my arm. I froze; a familiar, warm, electric current running through my body and leaving me immobilized. It was the first time, aside from when I'd punched him, we had touched. It was also the first time his skin didn't feel different from mine. Part of me wanted to revel in our equality, to just...feel him.

"You know, Bella, even those whom we believe we know best, lie sometimes," he said quietly. He placed the slightest pressure on my arm before releasing me altogether. My skin felt quite cold again, and I fought back the urge to reach out to him, to feel him once more.

I stared at him, not understanding. He looked up at me with only his eyes, and for the thousandth time I wished I could read _his_ mind.

He shrugged his shoulders and smiled weakly, "Just something to consider."

I nodded once, turning in search of Carlisle. I found him, as Edward had said, in his study.

"I suppose you heard that," I said by way of greeting.

Carlisle smiled, "Yes, and I'm actually very proud of you."

"Proud?" I asked.

"Of the way you stood your ground with Edward," he explained. "It isn't often anyone, other than Rosalie, can put him in his place like you just did."

"He doesn't like not being in control," I said.

"No," he agreed, "he doesn't. But maybe it's time he learned."

"Good luck with that," I cracked.

For the first time in two days, I didn't feel anxious. My first conversation with Edward in five years had come and gone. It was a rather uneventful event, unless you counted the emotional whiplash. Carlisle was right, I stood my ground. Showing Edward I was no longer the fragile, impressionable girl he remembered had to count for something, right?

"I do think Edward's suggestion about Jasper has merit," Carlisle said.

All I could do was nod. I didn't know why, but verbally admitting I agreed with Edward didn't seem physically possible.

"Jacob said he'd call back," I said. "I suppose he's got to talk with Sam and the others first."

"I'm sure," Carlisle agreed. He watched me as I fidgeted with the hem of my shirt. I was feeling a little off kilter after Edward's cryptic statement as I left him downstairs. Carlisle asked, "Is there anything else you'd like to talk about, Bella?"

I thought for a moment, then closed the door to the study and dropped my voice to barely a whisper, "Did you hear what Edward said to me on the stairs?" Carlisle shook his head. "He said 'even those whom we believe we know best, lie sometimes.'"

"Ah," Carlisle nodded, sitting in the large leather chair and placing his elbows on the desktop, he rested his chin on top of his hands, "well, I suppose he has a point."

"Okay," I said slowly, "but what exactly _is _his point?"

Smiling, a knowing but I'm not telling smile, he replied, "Perhaps the statement speaks for itself, Bella."

Exasperated, I sighed, running my hands through my hair and walking to sit on the sofa. "What is with all of you and your perplexing platitudes?" I asked.

"You and Edward have...things to work out," he said. "I think it's best if I stay out of it."

I recalled, though not for the first time, the occasions on which I had demanded my own father stay out of my business with Edward. How I wished he had done so. Maybe then, when I'd left, it could have been on better terms.

As if he were the one with mind reading abilities, Carlisle murmured, "Charlie did the best he could, I'm sure. You were his only child, Bella, and he worried for you."

"How did you know I was thinking of Charlie?" I asked, staring out of the window.

"It's written all over your face," he told me.

I was about to respond when my phone buzzed in my hand.

"Jacob," I answered.

"Hey, Bells," he greeted, his voice sounding more rational and friendly than before. "I'm sorry about before."

"Me, too," I said, still feeling defensive and a little wary. "I didn't know what else to do. Carlisle is the oldest vampire I know, and he's Alice's father."

"It's okay," he said, and I could hear him smiling. "You did what you thought was best."

"Did you talk to the others?" I asked.

"Can you be at my house within the hour?" he asked instead of answering my question.

Carlisle nodded, having heard, and I said, "We'll be there. Oh, and Jacob, I have one last request. I'd like to bring Jasper, too. He's Alice's mate, you know, and I think he deserves to be there."

"Don't you mean to say he's the one who can control everyone's emotions, and you'd like him there in case this meeting turns ugly?" Jacob laughed.

"Couldn't hurt, could it?" I asked, winking at Carlisle.

"Sure, sure," Jacob said. "Jasper can come, too."

"Thanks, Jacob. We'll see you in an hour."

Carlisle and I left with Jasper, and headed into the woods towards the Quileute reservation.

"I never said thank you for coming," I said to Carlisle once we were on our way.

"Thank you for calling me," he said. "I know it must have been difficult for you."

I suddenly felt ashamed of myself. Now, Carlisle and Alice had made the same comment. In my ire at Edward,I had given them the impression I wanted nothing to do with any of them. In truth, nothing could have been less accurate. The problem was, they were sort of a package deal.

I sighed, "I'm sorry, Carlisle."

"For what?" he asked.

Slowing my pace to a walk, I sighed again, unsure of what to apologize for first. Carlisle slowed beside me and glanced over his shoulder. Finally, I said, "For everything."

He was quiet for a moment before he said, "Bella, if anyone should be apologizing here it's me. I never should have allowed what happened."

"It's okay," I whispered, trying in vain to keep the emotion out of my voice. "I understand. I'm not saying I wasn't angry as hell, because I was, for a very long time, at all of you. Eventually, though, I realized you had no choice. Edwardgave you no choice."

"We all have choices Bella," he said, "and I made a poor one. At the time, though, my son was so insistent... Esme and I felt like we were forsaking our daughter for the will of our son. It wasn't an easy decision, and I've regretted the way we left you every day for five years. You were innocent, and you still are. You have nothing to apologize for."

"That's sweet of you to say," I said, a well of affection for the man beside me filling up my still heart. "I'm sorry your family's life was disrupted because of me, though. I know how much you all liked it here."

"We did," Carlisle said, "but we chose to go, Bella. Don't you see that? We did this to you, not the other way around. If we had stayed, if I had been able to convince Edward to stay and work through his issues...well, perhaps your transformation would have come about more the way Alice had envisioned."

"I've always wondered about that," I admitted. "I thought it was pretty clear my transformation was never on the table."

"Will none of you ever learn," Carlisle laughed lightly. "Never bet against Alice. Your transformation was a foregone conclusion, Bella. I only wish...," he let the thought die in the damp forest air.

"I wanted it to be him, too," I whispered, my voice barely registering in my own ears.

"Will you tell me," Carlisle gently pleaded with me, "something, anything about what happened? Did you...seek it out?" I watched as Jasper took a few steps ahead of us.

"No," I answered flatly, feeling sick at the idea of discussing my ordeal any more than I already had with Alice and Jasper. I realized when Carlisle sighed and nodded, he thought I meant I wouldn't tell him anything. "I mean," I continued slowly, wanting him to understand, "no, I didn't seek it out...I was...kidnapped." The fact I hadn't willingly been changed was all the information I was ready to part with at the moment.

Carlisle gasped, "What?"

"Kidnapped," I repeated. "I was taken from a hotel in Vancouver in the middle of the night."

Carlisle looked at Jasper, and seeing he didn't appear surprised, raised his eyebrows at his son. Jasper shrugged his shoulders and kept walking ahead of us.

"My God, Bella," Carlisle said, interested and concerned the way a father should be, the way my own father hadn't been given the chance to be, "by whom?" My silence told him I wasn't ready to give him the play by play. "Never mind," he said, eyeing me cautiously.

"It's not that I don't want you to know," I said, "but it's a long story, and..." I pointed ahead of us, "we're here."

**End Notes: Same rules apply...reviews=teasers! Only this time I promise to send you the right one! LOL**

**Now, I'm off to do what needs to be done so I can go buy my Eclipse DVD at midnight! :)**

**~CBx**


	15. Chapter 15 Revelations

**A/N: Okay, so you've all been begging for answers... You'll get a couple in this chapter! :)**

**I'd like to say again how wonderful you all are, constant reviewers and lurkers alike! It means so much to me that y'all are reading this, and that you're enjoying it!**

**Huge shout to the amazing Claire Bloom! Your beta skills are unsurpassed, babe! xoxo**

**As it will forever remain...SM owns all things Twilight...I just watched Eclipse on pay-per-view for 24 hours straight! lol **

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN- Revelations**

"**Tis all a chequer board of nights and days,**

**Where Destiny with men for pieces plays;**

**Hither and thither, and mates, and slays."**

**Edward Fitzgerald, **_**The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam**_

**Bella**

Standing on the invisible boundary marking the treaty line, Jacob was waiting.

"Hey, Bells," he called with a wave.

I shook off the blanket of unease from my almost confession to Carlisle, and waved back. "Hey, Jake."

Carlisle approached Jacob and held out his hand. "Jacob," he said.

Jacob took his hand and nodded, "Doctor Cullen." He released Carlisle's hand and turned to take Jasper's. "Jacob Black," he introduced himself.

"Jasper Hale," Jasper greeted him, "thank you for allowing me to sit in. And thank you for helping Bella save my Alice."

"Of course," Jacob replied, winking at me.

We followed Jacob to his house, and once inside, we were greeted warmly by his father, Billy. Memories of time spent in this home, with Jacob, came flooding back to me. I could picture us sitting on the small sofa, in the tiny living room, talking and watching television. I recalled afternoons working on homework, while Jacob tinkered with his car in the garage.

_Not now, Swan. _I reminded myself. This wasn't the time for sappy recollections.

"Bella," Billy smiled, reaching up from his wheelchair to pat my arm, "it's so good to see you."

"Thank you, Billy," I smiled back. "I believe you know Carlisle."

Billy turned to shake Carlisle's hand. "Doctor Cullen," he said stiffly.

"Mr Black," Carlisle said. "Thank you for opening your home for this discussion. This is my son, Jasper."

Billy and Jasper shook hands as well, as Billy glanced around the empty kitchen and said, "No trouble at all. I do wish Sam had taken us up on the offer as well, though. I'm sorry to say he's refused to talk with you."

"Well, that is rather disappointing," Carlisle responded impassively.

"What do you mean; Sam's refused to talk with us?" I asked, not nearly as docile as Carlisle. "Doesn't he understand Alice is sick? And it's his fault! He owes us an explanation!"

Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder, silently telling me I needed to calm down. I hoped Jasper wouldn't even try. Little did they know, my emotions were running unusually high, and I was in no mood to have them reigned in. If being emotionally charged was my power, as Jacob suggested, perhaps my outburst was necessary to get the ball rolling.

"And what of the other elders," I shouted, shrugging off Carlisle's hand, "they just follow Sam like...like...puppies?"

"Bella," I heard Carlisle warn in my ear, at the same time a soothing wave engulfed me. I glared at Jasper, demanding he stop.

Jacob laughed, though, and said, "Basically, yeah."

"Well, that's bullshit!" I yelled, throwing my hands up, effectively shaking off Jasper's influence. "Alice is suffering! She's practically blind, she can hardly walk across the room, and her gift is all kinds of screwed up! Sam defied the treaty! This is his fault!"

"I know, Bells," Jacob said, still laughing at my outburst. "That's what I told him, too. He just doesn't care." He quit laughing and shrugged his shoulders, shaking his head, seemingly baffled.

"Somebody around here must know something!" I cried. "Billy, please! You have to help us."

"I honestly don't know what to tell you, Bella," Billy said, looking genuinely sorry. "My generation never phased, never fought vampires. Everything I know is through my grandfather's legends."

"Jacob?" I turned to look at my friend. "Please."

Jacob walked to stand in front of me, and smiled weakly. "I'll see what I can find out from the others. Maybe one of the elders will talk to me or Billy. I'm sorry, Bella. I thought..."

"It's not your fault, Jacob," I sighed, feeling my excited state come to an end.

"Maybe you should come along," Jacob smiled, nudging my shoulder, "you know, use that super cool power of yours on Harry Clearwater or something."

"Maybe," I smiled.

"Well," Carlisle said from behind me, "since there's nothing more to discuss at present, we really should get back to Alice."

"Of course," Billy said. "I'm sorry, Doctor Cullen. Jacob will let you know if we find out anything helpful."

Carlisle nodded his thanks as he and Jasper headed for the door. "Bella," he called to me.

"Coming," I said, following him. "Bye Jacob, Billy."

"I hate that it wasn't a more productive trip," Carlisle said once we were in the forest again.

"Me, too," I agreed, though not nearly as complacent as Carlisle. "How dare Sam not agree to meet with you?"

"I'm actually more interested in why Sam is the one in charge," Carlisle said off-handedly, as though I would understand what he was talking about.

"What?" I asked, wondering what Carlisle knew and I didn't. "Why wouldn't he be? Jacob said Sam phased first, so wouldn't it stand to reason that..."

"It's my understanding in generations who phase, the position of Alpha, and by extension tribal chief, is decided upon by lineage," Jasper interjected, looking to Carlisle for confirmation. When Carlisle nodded, Jasper continued, "That lineage doesn't belong to Sam Uley."

"Then who..." and, suddenly, I got it. I recalled Jacob's menacing words to Sam in the clearing.

"_I mean it, Sam... Don't make me...I don't want to..."_

How could I have missed it? Jacob's threat, and Sam's reluctant withdrawal, Carlisle's explanation that it was Ephraim Black with whom he had made the original treaty...

"Jacob?" I breathed.

"Indeed," Carlisle nodded. "It would seem young Mister Black has allowed Sam Uley to usurp his rightful place within the tribe."

"Why?" I asked, still shocked at the revelation.

"I'm sure he has his reasons," Carlisle shrugged. "Being a tribal elder, let alone chief, puts one under quite a bit of pressure, I'm sure. And Jacob is rather young for such lifelong responsibilities."

We walked for a bit, Carlisle calling Esme to let her know we were on our way back to the house. I was thinking about Jacob's suggestion that I go with him to talk to some of the other elders. Perhaps my passion for Alice's well-being could convince Harry Clearwater to glean some piece of vital information. Harry, after all, had been one of Charlie's best friends.

"Bella," Jasper called, breaking me from my thoughts, "why wouldn't you let me calm things down back there?"

"Jacob has this theory," I almost laughed, "about my heightened emotions being my super cool power. I just figured, if he's right, then why stop them from coming?"

"I see," Jasper laughed with me. "Well, I think the fact you can shake off my gift as easily as you do is rather interesting, too."

"I can do that?" I asked. I knew I had overcome Jasper's calming attempts when Edward had arrived, but I'd assumed it was because my fury was too great at the time. I never imagined I could do it simply because I wanted to.

"Yes, you can," he said, smiling. "The other day when you came back, I was tossing around so much, trying to get Edward to chill out, and you...just...weren't affected at all."

"Hmm..." I pondered Jasper's revelation. "Well, that is interesting." I smiled to myself. Perhaps _feeling _wasn't the end of my extracurricular activities, after all.

"I think perhaps one day, we should have Eleazar visit with Bella," Carlisle said, patting Jasper on the back.

"Who's Eleazar?" I asked.

"He's one of our Denali cousins," Carlisle explained. "He worked for the Volturi at one time, and he has experience with discovering the gifts some vampires may possess."

"He worked for the Volturi?" I asked. "I don't know much about them, apart from what Edward told me. And that was...well, on my birthday." My memories surrounding Edward's description of the vampire world's Royal Guard were hazy, and in the past five years, I'd only heard them mentioned a time or two. The stories reminded me of Grim Reaper tales, full of pain and death and destruction.

"They aren't all bad," Carlisle explained. "In fact, it would be nearly impossible for any of us to exist at all, were it not for the rules they enforce."

"Isn't there just one rule?" I asked, smiling, knowing all the other rules descended from the most important one - Never reveal our existence to humans.

"I suppose," Carlisle smiled. "Honestly, the Volturi are noble and just in their own way, keeping the secret is paramount."

"Unless, of course," Jasper interjected a bit of humor, "you're us." He nudged me with his shoulder and slung his arm around my neck. "We like to live on the edge, and tell every pretty girl who we really are."

"Well, technically," I laughed, "no one _told _me."

"'Tis true, Miss Swan," Jasper said. "You are one smart cookie, darlin'."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Back at the house, Alice was sitting on the front porch steps, knees bouncing, and fidgeting with the hem of her dress.

"Well?" she asked as she heard us approach. "What did they say?" She stood up and placed her tiny hands on her waist. "Is it permanent? How do we fix it? Did that ghastly Sam Uley apologize for what he's done to me?"

"Slow down, Alice," Jasper said, walking to her and planting a small kiss on her cheek. "There was a little...snag…"

"Snag?" Alice asked. "Bella, what does he mean by 'snag'?"

"Sam wouldn't meet with us," I whispered, bracing myself for the screeching that was surely to come.

"Excuse me?" Alice shouted. "He wouldn't meet with you? He broke the treaty! Shouldn't he be, like, severely punished or something?"

I couldn't help but laugh. Poor Alice, so accustomed to knowing everything, was having a difficult time of it.

"Alice," I said, coming to her side and pulling her to sit on the steps with me, "it's going to be alright, I promise. I'm going to do whatever I have to do, to figure this out." Alice put her tiny head on my shoulder and reached out for my hand. "Are you any better at all?" I asked.

"Not really," she said dolefully. "I can see a bit more in the light, shapes instead of just blobs, but nothing is clear."

"Okay, then," I said. "That's something, right?" I felt her nod against my shoulder, and I patted her leg. "I'll tell you what, if you're not any better by tomorrow, I'll find Sam Uley myself and do whatever it takes to make him talk to me."

"Thank you, Bella," she said. "Oh, and I had a little talk with Edward while you were gone," she added.

Carlisle chuckled lightly, "Jasper, I think that's our cue."

"Yep," Jasper laughed. The two walked inside, leaving Alice and I alone.

"What did you talk about?" I asked.

Alice sat up and turned to face me. "Oh, lots of things," she laughed. "Mostly, I explained to him how he has to accept reality for what it is."

"You mean accept _me _for what _I _am," I said.

"Well, yes," she smiled. "You know, Bella, and I say this with the utmost sympathy for what it must have been like for you to walk outside and see him standing there, but...he didn't know. In a way, he was just as shocked to see you as you were him. He was expecting a living, breathing, human. I know he didn't handle it very well, but, let's be honest, who's surprised about that?" I smiled; she was right, I shouldn't have been surprised at all. "I'm just saying," she said, leaning closer to me and clutching my hand, "you weren't the only one confused in that particular moment."

I supposed Alice had a point. Edward came to Forks expecting a human me. Perhaps I could have cut him a little slack...a very little, but still.

"I also told him," she went on, "when it comes to dealing with the wolves, you're in charge. He wants to play the protective, big brother role with me, but I said this time it's little sister's turn."

"Oh, _I'm _the _little _sister here?" I laughed, playfully patting Alice on the top of her head.

"It isn't nice to make fun of the handicapped," Alice pretended to pout.

"Okay, okay," I said.

"It's alright," Alice laughed. "Edward wasn't too keen on my calling you his little sister, either," she smirked.

I rolled my eyes, even though she wouldn't see it, and said, "Thank you for trying."

"He's not going to stop trying to talk to you, you know," she said.

I sighed, "I know. I just don't know what he expects me to say."

I heard the front door open slightly behind us, followed by Edward's voice, "You don't have to say anything."

I turned and glared at him, "What did we say about eavesdropping, Edward?"

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, looking sincerely apologetic, "but it's not like everyone inside can't hear you." Alice, using my shoulder for leverage, stood up and headed for the door.

"Besides," Edward said, "I'd be satisfied if you'd simply listen. There is so much I need to say."

"Nice evening for a walk, I'd say," Alice quipped from the doorway.

Standing up, I put my hands on my hips and raised an eyebrow at her.

"She's giving me one of those looks, isn't she?" Alice asked Edward.

"She is," he laughed lightly.

"Fine, then," Alice said, "stay out here on the porch, I'm sure Emmett won't mind sitting on the stairs, listening to every word." And with that, she stepped inside, her laughter tinkling through the door as she closed it.

"She has a point," Edward shrugged. "Emmett's the worst eavesdropper in the family."

I didn't say anything; instead, I walked down the porch steps and toward the back of the house. I had rounded the corner and was headed for the tree line, when Edward spoke up again.

"I don't know about you," he spoke quietly, "but I'm really not enjoying the deja vu,"

I stopped and turned, staring at him blankly. Did he seriously just go there?

"Too soon?" He smiled.

Blinking once and shaking my head, I turned back towards the trees and walked inside the enveloping canopy. Edward followed close behind me, silent. About half a mile away from the house, I stopped, sitting on a fallen hemlock. Edward leaned against a nearby tree and watched me. The look on his face had changed over the past couple of days. No longer shock, the expression had morphed into curiosity laced with intrigue. His eyes bore into me, even though I wasn't looking at him, until I couldn't take it anymore.

"What?" I asked, closing my eyes rather than look at him.

"I'm sorry," he muttered, shifting his feet and pacing a little ways in front of me. "I'm just...you're just…"

"I'm just like you, Edward," I told him, looking at the ground to avoid his inspection. "I don't look any different than Alice or Rosalie or Esme. I'm not a circus freak or some kind of novelty. It's just me...only…"

"Better," I swear I heard him whisper.

My eyes snapped up, and I was met with his intense gaze.

"What did you say?" I asked, my voice threatening to give away any true feeling about what he'd said.

"You're _not_ just like Alice or Rosalie or Esme," he said, taking a tentative step closer to me, "you're… better than anything I ever…. You're… Bella, I…" He reached out his hand, as if to touch me, and I leant back in my seat, away from him.

"No," I whispered.

Edward dropped his hand for a moment before lifting it again to run through his hair. Seeing the simple, ingrained mannerism, what felt like a million pictures of the past, flashed through my memory, and I remembered, with almost perfect clarity, the first time I'd seen him do it. My mind was lost in the moment, images of him, smiling crookedly at me as he ran a hand through his eternally, unruly hair.

"Bella," I heard him call out to me. I couldn't answer, for I was reliving memory after memory, as though they had happened only yesterday. Suddenly, a current of warmth ran up my arm and into my chest. He had touched me. "Bella," he said again. "Are you alright?"

The images faded, and Edward stood in front of me again, confusion written on his face. Slowly, I pulled my arm back and took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry," I said. "Don't...touch me, okay?"

"Okay?" He phrased it as a question. "What just happened there?"

"Memories," I said softly.

Edward took a step away from me, and I relaxed somewhat, placing my hands beside me on the trunk of the mossy hemlock.

"So," I cleared my throat, "you said you wanted me to listen."

"Yes," he started pacing again. "There is so much to say, Bella."

"Well, say it, then."

"Where to begin?" he asked, I think more to himself than to me.

I answered anyway, "How about the beginning?"

"The beginning?" he asked.

"Or the beginning of the end, perhaps," I suggested. "Why not start with the day you realized you didn't love me?"

"Oh, Bella," he breathed, a small smile gracing his lips. "Do you honestly believe that?"

"You said it," I snapped. "I remember _that _quite clearly. You said you didn't want me." The words, though they slipped from my mouth so easily, wrenched through my heart like a sword.

"I did…" he said. "But, Bella… okay, I'm going to start with a question. Would that be alright?" I shrugged my shoulders indifferently. "You believed me so easily that day. Why?"

Why? It was quite the question. Why had I believed him? He had never lied to me before, but it had never made sense for him to love me. Maybe I'd believed him because somewhere, deep in my soul, I'd been waiting for that day to come.

"Why not?" I answered. He regarded me, perplexed. "You never wanted this life for me, Edward."

"That isn't entirely true, Bella," he disagreed.

"Really?" I asked, sarcastically. "Isn't it? In Phoenix, you chose to save my human life rather than allow me to become one of you."

"If this life was to be yours," he said, once again raking his hand through his bronze locks, "I didn't want it to happen in that way- violently, without your consent. If being one of us what what you truly desired in the end, I wanted it to be wholly your choice. Our transformation is innately brutal; you should have been with someone who mattered and could help you take that step. You can not begin to imagine how extraordinarily intense the desire was to have _my _venom coursing through your veins."

"And yet," I said, sweeping my hand over myself in a grand gesture, "here I am; changed. And it was done both _violently_, and _without_ my consent."

Edward winced at my admission. I realized just then, he had no inkling of the circumstances surrounding my change. Alice had done a fine job of keeping my story, what she knew of it, quiet. A myriad of emotion crossed his face- shock and anger, followed by pain and anguish, and finally some kind of resolve.

"Don't you see?" he asked, frustrated. "Aren't you hearing what I'm trying to tell you? I lied, Bella, I lied! I loved you, I wanted you, wanted to change you, but I was...afraid for you."

My brain bypassed the part where he said he'd lied, and skipped over his fear, instead going straight for the part where he said he loved me… _loved… _as in, he loved me then… in the past… Conflicted feelings welled up in my chest. I'd spent five years hating him, yet I was nearly crushed by the idea everything we'd had was indeed gone.

As if he had been able to read my thoughts after all, he quickly corrected his mistake.

"Bella… what I mean is…"

"Save it, Edward," I interrupted, holding up my hand.

"No, Bella, you said you would listen," he pleaded with me.

"I think you've said enough."

"I haven't said nearly enough," he sighed, "if you aren't hearing me, clearly. I will admit I had reservations about you becoming one of us, but it wasn't because I didn't _want _you forever. It was because I was afraid you'd hate me for it afterwards. Taking your life wasn't something I could just...do. If you'd changed your mind, decided this life wasn't all you thought it would be, if your feelings for me had waned, or...you would have hated me, Bella…"

"And yet, your plan worked out so much better," I sneered.

"Bella, please," he begged.

"You know, Edward," I said, standing up and pacing a few feet away from him, "the problem with all this is, I don't know if you're saying these things because you mean them, or because it doesn't matter anymore. You left me because when I was human, I was a liability to you, an inconvenience. It's pretty easy to take all that back now it's irrelevant."

"I never saw you as a liability or an inconvenience," he whispered. "I was trying to keep you alive."

"You could have kept me alive," I said.

Before either of us could say anything else, Edward held his hand up to me and cut his eyes to the right. When he looked back at me, I furrowed my brow in question and he pointed into the trees. He took in a deep breath, and I followed suit, immediately overcome with the need to gag.

There were wolves nearby.

Edward kept his hand raised to me, and closed his eyes. He was listening. I realized he must have heard something he didn't like because when he opened his eyes again they burned with fury. Reaching out, he grabbed my arm and jerked me towards the nearest tree. Leaping up, we landed on the lowest branch then climbed farther still. Crouching low and staying close to the massive trunk, I looked down into the forest. I could hear the wolves approaching, and listened to see if I could determine how many there were. Edward's way was faster though, and he held up two fingers.

"What are they doing out here?" I whispered.

"Sam sent them," he said through clenched teeth, "something about making up for losing Alice." The anger flashing in his eyes was palpable.

I'm sure the look was mirrored in my own expression. I went to climb down, but Edward stopped me, pulling on the lapel of my jacket.

"Wait," he whispered.

I could hear them getting closer, and watched as Edward listened some more. It felt like an hour before he spoke again, though it was probably only seconds.

"One of them wants to see you," he said. Confused, I shot him a questioning glance, but he simply shrugged his shoulders. "The other one called him Seth," he said. "Who is that?"

I wasn't sure. I thought hard, tried to recall anyone I had known with that name. We could see them now, coming through the trees. They appeared to be on a walk, not a mission. Slowly, they ambled through the brush, sniffing here and there along the way. I knew our scents were all over the woods, and hoped they would chalk it up to being so close to the house, not noticing where we were hiding. One of them must have had another thought about Alice, because Edward clenched his fists at his sides and ground his jaw so tight, I could almost hear his teeth gnashing. He looked ready to bolt down from our spot just as my brain brought the name and face of Seth Clearwater into my head.

"Stop," I said, quickly and quietly. Edward jerked his attention to me. "It's Seth Clearwater," I said. "He's just a kid, Edward."

Seth Clearwater was Harry's son. He couldn't have been more than thirteen when I knew him. Even though five years had passed, and he must have grown when he began phasing, the only image in my mind was of a gangly teenager.

"Please," I whispered. "Just listen. See if they'll give us something to go on."

I could tell Edward didn't like it, but he complied with my request. The two wolves; one small and gray, the other larger and chocolate brown, walked directly beneath us. They stopped momentarily before the smaller one, who I assumed was Seth, looked over at the larger one. Their silent conversation was brief, ending when the brown wolf nodded his head and turned back. Loping off the way they had come, the shapeshifters soon disappeared back into the forest.

"What did you hear?" I asked Edward when we had climbed down again.

"Not much," he said stiffly. "Apparently, Sam sent them looking for one of us on our own."

"What could Sam Uley possibly have against your family that would cause him to go against the treaty like this?" I asked.

"I have no idea," Edward said. "None of us has ever even met him."

"There's something we're missing here," I mused.

"And we need to find out what it is," Edward finished my thought.

"I should call Jacob," I mumbled, fishing my cell phone from my pocket.

Edward looked as though he wanted to protest, but the buzzing phone in my hand stopped him. Looking at the caller ID, I laughed despite the situation.

"Well, speak of the devil and he appears," I spoke into the receiver.

"Bella," Jacob sounded serious. "Where are you?"

"In the woods behind the Cullen house," I replied. "I was just about to call you."

"Get back to the house," Jacob ordered, sounding both commanding and worried. "I just had a chat with Quil Ateara, and it isn't safe for any of you to be out right now."

"Yeah, I noticed," I agreed. "Edward and I just spotted Seth Clearwater and someone else skulking around out here. What the hell is going on?"

"Just get back to the house," he said again. "I'm on my way."

Jacob hung up, and Edward and I rushed back to the house. Once inside, we gathered everyone and told them what was going on.

"Obviously, Jacob knows something," I told them. "He should be here any minute."

"I don't understand," Carlisle mused, hugging Esme to his side. "We've never met Sam Uley. He has no family on the reservation who I've ever known. What could have brought on this vendetta?"

"Whatever it is," Emmett spoke up, "he's going to be sorry." He stood behind Alice and wrapped his giant arms around her neck. "Nobody messes with the Cullens and gets away with it."

Out of frustration, I took a deep breath, and when I did, I smelled Jacob approaching. Without a word, I walked to the front door and opened it. Jacob was just stepping onto the porch.

"Hey, Bells," he said.

"Come in," I said, stepping aside. "Jacob's here," I called to the others.

"What the hell, dude?" Emmett piped up.

"Who does this asshole think he is?" Rosalie was next.

"You're supposed to be in charge," Edward accused, pointing a finger at Jacob. "Why can't you handle your pack?" Edward charged toward Jacob as he spoke, fists balled up and eyes blazing.

"They aren't _my_ pack," Jacob insisted, striding across the room in Edward's direction. "And I _am _here to help."

Standing equal distance from the two of them, I could feel the tension in the air, covering every one of us like a thick, wool blanket. My skin was prickling and my stomach was suddenly in knots. I looked to Jasper, begging for him to calm everyone down.

Carlisle was between Edward and Jacob before Jasper could do anything.

"Edward," he warned. "Jacob called Bella, remember? He is here to help."

"If he wants to help," Edward snarled, "he should tell his Goddamn litter of puppies to back the fuck off!"

I was infinitesimally distracted by Edward's language. Even in his most angry moments, I was sure he had never used an expletive stronger than 'hell'. Shaking off my inappropriate response, I jumped in front of Jacob, causing Edward to take a surprised step backwards.

"Stop it!" I cried, my eyes stinging with phantom tears. "Edward, you have to calm down or you have to leave!"

He stared at me, incredulously, and scoffed, "Are you kidding me?"

"Edward," Carlisle spoke again, this time backed by a small wave of calm from Jasper. "Jacob came here to tell us something. We need to hear him out."

"Edward, please," came Alice's quiet appeal.

Slowly, but surely, Edward backed himself against the wall. Esme walked to him, placing a motherly hand on his shoulder. Jacob walked further into the house and stood in front of the mantle.

"Jacob," I urged, stepping up beside him. "What did Quil have to say?"

"Sam's wife, Emily, has been kidnapped," he began soberly. Just the mention of the word made me quake inside. I didn't know Emily, or even who she was really, but the idea of being taken hostage...I knew all too well how that felt. "Apparently by someone who would like to see one or more of you Cullens burning in a bonfire," Jacob added.

"I don't understand," Esme said, sounding more frightened than I'd ever heard her.

"Me either," Jacob shrugged. "I was poking around today, as I said I would, and Quil let it slip that Emily wasn't at her mother's like we all thought. He said she'd been taken while Sam was out on patrol a few days before they attacked Alice in the clearing."

"What does this have to do with my family?" Carlisle asked.

"I wish I could tell you," Jacob said, "but I honestly don't know. Quil said Sam's orders were that I was to know nothing about it. He was afraid I might 'get in the way.' Of course, he's right, because that's exactly what I intend to do. If you'll let me help, that is."

"Why would you help us?" Edward asked from his spot on the wall. His disbelief in Jacob's sincerity was evident in his voice.

"Because," Jacob glared at Edward, "my people are peaceful, honorable. Coming after you like this doesn't only go against the treaty it also goes against the ways of our tribe. Sam had options. He could have talked with the elders."

"I'm assuming that whoever has Sam's wife is one of us?" Jasper asked.

"I can't think of any human who would do such a thing," Jacob said. "Are there even any who know about you?"

"Not anymore," Emmett said, shooting a grin and a wink in my direction.

"So then why not just go after the kidnapper himself?" Jasper asked. "Certainly your pack could take on one vampire."

"Quil said the kidnapper told Sam if she got one whiff of wolf, she'd snap Emily's neck before he could get close enough to stop her," Jacob explained. "Sam must have believed her, because he basically put out a hit on your entire clan. She's using Emily as leverage. I just don't know why anyone would want to start a fight between you and the tribe. It doesn't make sense."

The others were so caught up in the moment; in the threat to their family, they somehow managed to overlook Jacob's choice of pronoun. I didn't. And the only 'she' who would want vengeance against the Cullens was…

Alice let out a small gasp as I whispered her name, "Victoria."

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0oo**

**End Notes: So...I know, you all saw that coming, but hey! What's a fic without Victoria being the bitch, right? :) No worries, my lovlies, more answers (and the story you've all been waiting for) are coming up in Chapter 16! If you want a little sneaky peak at that, hit the pretty little REVIEW button down below! :)**

**Until next time...**

**~CBx**


	16. Chapter 16 Ghosts of the Past

**A/N: Okay, so I know I was total fail on the teasers, and that this chapter is a few days late... I'm so sorry! You know how Real Life kind of has a way of kicking your ass every now and again? Yeah, that's exactly what happened! I'm super sorry, and swear to do better! However, I will go ahead and tell you that with Christmas (and the fact that Chapter 17 hasn't even been written yet) the next update is probably two weeks away. ****Hopefully, the content of this chapter will warrant forgiveness from all of you! :)**

**Thank you to xxTailoredDreamsxx for rec'ing this story with her new chapter. She writes this amazing new fic called "It's Real Life" and you must check it out! :)**

**Claire, honey- you are Super Beta! You are amazing. You are generous. You are kind. You are beautiful. And I adore you! ;)**

**As always, SM owns Twilight. I own a new sweater and some new running shoes that I got for my birthday. :)**

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN- Ghosts of the Past**

"**...and it would knock me to the floor**

**If I wasn't there already**

**If only I could hunt the hunter…"**

_**All I Really Want, **_**Alanis Morissette **

**Bella**

_No, no, no, no, no… _

I couldn't stop the word from repeating itself inside my head.

I saw flames. Not psychological, rage-induced imaginings, but thick, waving tendrils of flaming, red hair. I could hear her, wild and nearly incoherent, in my ears…

"_I have you now, little girl," she hissed, grabbing the hair at the nape of my neck, and jerking my head up. "We'll see how long it takes your lover to come knocking."_

I paced the living room, in a bubble of my own subconscious. Somehow, the madness that surrounded my whispered revelation was completely blocked from my senses. I could see them, vaguely, as they moved about frantically. However, I couldn't hear the words which appeared to be coming fast and furiously. Another memory assaulted me.

_Cold, hard steel pressed into my back, and my throat was parched. Craning my neck, I sought out the freezing metal against my cheek, desperate for anything to make the blazing inferno cease. My hands clenched and then unclenched, digging into the material of my jeans, ripping holes in the denim. A searing pain scorched me from head to toe, and my back involuntarily arched off the surface I lay on. I screamed… _

"Focus," I told myself. Closing my eyes for a moment, I concentrated on the scene unfolding in front of me. I seemed to be far away, and, glancing quickly around, I realized I was pressed into the brick of the fireplace. As the frenzy of motion in the room became clearer, I could see Alice on the sofa, with Jasper on one side of her and Rosalie on the other, holding her hand. Carlisle had Esme under his arm, reassuring her. I could see the wheels turning in Emmett's head as he pounded his fists together. Jacob was on the phone, speaking hurriedly, and pacing the foyer. Edward was watching me, with a fierce, pained look on his face.

Flashes of fiery, auburn hair spirited in my periphery- another memory trying to force its way out- but I shook them off, concentrating on the matter at hand.

Victoria had kidnapped Sam Uley's wife. Somewhere, Emily was being held against her will, by the most psychotic being I had ever encountered. I imagined that six years of stewing over her mate's death had caused Victoria to become even more unhinged, especially after I had escaped her grasp. I felt so sorry for Sam, knowing he was basically powerless. Jacob said Sam had options, but had he? The woman he loved had been taken, and his only recourse was to do as the deranged vampire said. I shifted on the balls of my feet, pacing a few steps

Edward came to stand very close to me, a worried expression in his eyes.

"Bella," he said, reaching out but not touching me. "Did she… was it… is Victoria responsible for…" His question was discombobulated because of his anger. I supposed my spaced out reaction to the realization Victoria was involved in our current situation had made the answer clear.

_Oh, I don't need your pity right now, _I thought. _We need to focus on getting to Emily before it's too late._

Edward regarded me, the bewildered countenance from a few days earlier returning.

"What did you say?" he asked carefully, and very quietly.

"I didn't," I answered, returning his stare. I hadn't _said_ anything…

Edward took a step backwards and shook his head slowly.

I heard Jasper call out to Esme, "See if you can find a pencil and paper."

"I don't know if I can do it," Alice lamented. "It wasn't… she was there, but I'm not sure if…"

"You'll do the best you can," Rosalie said, patting Alice's arm.

Esme left and returned quickly, a notepad and a small pencil in her hand. Alice took them and began to scratch out a drawing.

"Alice had a vision?" I asked Edward. I had obviously missed something during my internal struggle, and I was excited at the possibility.

He nodded and quietly answered, "Sort of. It was just a flash, really."

"That's wonderful," I breathed. If Alice had seen anything useful, it would not only mean Alice was finally getting better, but we had a chance to save Emily.

Alice scrawled wildly on the small slip of paper, letting out little huffs as she worked. Moments later, she thrust the drawing into Jasper's hands. He rose and took it to Jacob.

Eyes widening, Jacob spoke into the phone, "Yeah, hang on…" He nodded to Jasper and whispered, "That's her. Where is she?"

Jasper shrugged, "She can't tell. I'm sorry."

Turning his attention back to his call, Jacob said, "Listen, Paul, I know what Sam said, but you've got to trust me… The Cullens; they've dealt with her before. We need them to get Emily back safely. Tell my father I'm making the call… He'll know what it means." Jacob hung up, slipping his phone into his pocket, and walked over to where I stood with Edward. "You're sure this Victoria is the one who has Emily?" he directed his inquiry at Edward.

"It has to be," Edward replied. "She's wants revenge because we killed her mate, James."

"He's the one who attacked Bella in Phoenix?" Jacob asked, pointing at the crescent shaped scar on my right wrist.

"Yes," Edward nodded. I saw him tighten his jaw at the memory.

"And you can take the bitch out?" Jacob questioned, clenching his teeth and pulling his eyebrows together.

"If someone will tell us how to cure Alice," Edward countered.

"Consider it done," Jacob said. "I have to go," he told me. "I need to gather the elders and set up a council meeting."

"A council meeting?" I snapped. "Now?"

"It's necessary," he started to explain.

"Jacob," Edward interrupted, having picked up on Jacob's plan before he had a chance to voice it, "you don't have to…"

"I do," Jacob responded. "It's the only way."

"Wait, what does that mean? What are you talking about?" I asked, looking between the two of them for an answer.

Jacob eyed me stoically. "I'll be back, and I'll have the answers you need." He nodded once to Edward and walked out of the house.

"Will you please tell me what the hell that was?" I turned on Edward. "I know that you know what he was thinking."

"Jacob is going to plead his case to the elders, then challenge Sam's authority," he stated. "When he does, he can order Sam to stop the attacks. He can also demand answers from anyone in the tribe on how to cure Alice."

"What?" I was astonished Jacob would do such a thing. I remembered his words from earlier, when he'd said his people were honorable; to go to such lengths, to change the course of his entire life to simply to help - Honorable seemed a fitting adjective.

Carlisle joined Edward and I, asking, "Did I hear you correctly, son? Jacob is challenging Sam?"

"Yes," Edward said.

"Well," Carlisle smiled, "that will certainly help matters."

"And Alice had a vision," I said. "It must mean she's getting better, right?"

"It was spotty," Carlisle told me, "but she did see Emily, and perhaps when Jacob returns, he will have information that will help heal Alice completely. If the remedy is quick, we might be able to save Emily before anyone else is hurt."

Rosalie passed by us in a flash across the room, whipping back the living room curtains and pointing into the yard.

"Would someone care to explain why there's a teenage girl running up the driveway?" She turned and glared at me when she asked.

A teenage girl?

"No!" I cried, rushing to Rosalie's side and peering out the window.

Ashley Henry was indeed running up the driveway. I was outside before any of the others processed what Rosalie said.

"Ashley!" I called. "What are you doing here? It's the middle of the night, and you shouldn't be here! You have to go home." I noticed she was wearing pajama bottoms and a Forks High sweatshirt, with her favorite Uggs. It looked as though she had jumped straight out of bed before rushing to the house. I wondered how she even knew where the house was, but couldn't ask before she started yelling.

"Oh, Bella!" she wailed. "Thank God you're alright!"

The girl flung herself into my arms, almost bouncing off my granite form. Gently, I pried her off me and looked into her eyes; she was terrified.

"Ashley," I asked, "why did you think I wasn't alright?"

"I saw you," she sobbed, crocodile tears slipping from her eyes and down her cheeks, and grabbed at my jacket. "I saw you… and… him… and, oh, Bella!" Once again, she crushed herself into me, holding on tightly and sobbing some more. "I saw what he did to you… I don't understand…"

"Bella," Rosalie called from behind me. She was glancing out into the trees and down the driveway, sniffing inconspicuously. "Bring her inside. It still isn't…"

I knew Rose wanted to say 'safe' but refrained due to Ashley's obvious distress. I scooped Ashley into my arms and carried her into the house. Bringing a human girl, especially one so young, inside a house full of vampires was risky I knew, but I saw no other choice. Setting Ashley down on the sofa next to Alice, I sent Emmett to get her a glass of water. Her hands never left my jacket, clinging to me like I was going to disappear any second. I knew I would need to explain to the others who she was, and figure out how she knew where to find us, but first I needed to be sure she was okay.

"Ashley," I prodded, "you need to tell me what you saw." My inquiry drew everyone's attention. Ashley glanced nervously around at the strange, beautiful people staring at her. "It's okay," I told her. "You remember I told you about my friend who sees things the way you do?" Ashley nodded slowly. "This is Alice," I said, taking Alice's hand in mine. "And these people," I gestured with my eyes to the others, "are her family. Everyone in this room will believe in what you saw."

"Really?" she asked, trembling.

"Really," I answered, taking the glass from Emmett as he knelt beside me. "Thank you, Emmett," I said. "Ashley, this is Emmett."

"Hey, kid," Emmett beamed at the girl. His bright, dimpled smile brought a small one to Ashley's face. "That's my girl, Rosalie," he said, nodding at Rose, who gave a little wave. "Over there," he pointed at Jasper, "that's my brother, Jasper. And those two are Carlisle and Esme, they're our parents." Ashley cautiously moved her eyes as Emmett spoke. "Tall, dark and broody over by the fireplace is Edward," he winked.

Ashley chanced another look at everyone before returning her eyes to Emmett. Slowly, she loosened her grip on me and seemed to relax minutely.

"They're the ones in the photo album," she whispered to me. I smiled and nodded.

"Bella's right, too," Emmett added, "anything you say we'll believe. We're pretty good with weird around here."

"See?" I prompted Ashley. "Please, tell me what you saw. It could be important."

Ashley took a sip of her water, followed by a deep breath.

"I was in my room, studying," she began. "Then, I saw you… and you were screaming… and bleeding, and then I saw…" A flood of tears interrupted her story.

"Who?" I asked. "You said before you saw 'him.' Who did you see?"

"My cousin," she practically whimpered. "He… he…"

And suddenly, all the pieces fell into place. Wondering exactly what the odds had to be, I managed to ask the question I already knew the answer to.

"Ashley," I sighed, "your cousin… is his name Riley?" The girl nodded, staring at me with wide eyes. "It's alright," I tried to console her, "what you saw, it happened in the past. I'm fine."

"H-how did you know?"

I took a deep breath and looked around the room. I had no intention of telling the entire story just yet, not with Ashley around. So I settled for what I hoped would placate her.

"I knew your cousin," I explained. "I didn't realize it when you first told me about him."

"He hurt you," she said, sounding stronger, almost angry.

"He did," I sighed, "but it was a long time ago."

From across the room, I heard Edward take in a sharp breath as he realized what I was saying. Ashley's brief description of me screaming and bleeding would be all the confirmation the family needed.

"It wasn't entirely his fault," I went on, "and I'm okay now."

"I've seen him in my dreams every night this week," Ashley admitted.

"What is he doing in your dreams?" I inquired.

"Mostly he's arguing with someone," she said, "a woman. She's scary."

I glanced up at Carlisle, and he raised his brow, asking "Victoria?" too low and fast for Ashley to hear. I nodded just as quickly.

"Can you hear what they're arguing about?" I asked Ashley.

"Not really," she said apologetically. "I can just tell they're fighting."

"Can you see where they are?" Alice jumped in, being careful to ask without pushing. "Does anything stand out? Can you tell if they're inside or outside?"

"Inside," Ashley answered. She thought for a moment, then nodded and said, "I think it might be a warehouse or something."

Smiling, I rubbed Ashley's arm. "Thank you, Ashley. You have no idea how much you've helped us."

"You know where they are?" Alice whispered, again too low for Ashley's ears to hear. Again, I nodded.

"Hey, Ash," I smiled at her, "we need to get you home before your parents realize you're gone. I don't want them to worry. Would it be alright if Emmett and Rosalie drove you?"

"Okay," she agreed.

"I just have one more question," I said, standing up and bringing her with me. "How did you know where I was?"

Ashley looked sheepishly around the room and answered, "In one of the pictures, you and him," she glanced at where Edward stood, "are standing in front of the house. Then, the other day at school, I heard one of the secretaries talking about this place, saying how the family that used to live here just up and left when she was in high school. She went on and on about how strange and… beautiful they all were." She blushed slightly, calling the Cullens beautiful. "Anyway, I figured it was the only place you'd be if you were still here, and I thought you were hurt so…" She was beginning to ramble.

Rosalie jumped in to stop her, "Hey, is that secretary's last name Stanley?"

"Um… yeah," Ashley stammered.

Jasper chuckled, "Figures."

"Emmett, my keys are on the table," I said, laughing a little myself. It would figure that Jessica Stanley was still in town, and still talking about the Cullens. "She lives in my old house." I told him.

I walked Ashley to the car, and settled her in the back seat. Emmett and Rosalie came out, and I stopped them before they got in.

"We'll take care of her," Rosalie reassured me.

"You guys be careful, too," I warned them. "She knows enough, more than she should really, and she's pretty persistent. Don't answer any of her questions."

Emmett laughed, "No problem, Bells, oh, and could you wait until we get back before explaining?" He winked at me, "I have a feeling it's a good one."

"Sure thing," I smiled.

Waving to Ashley, I walked back into the house, where I was barraged with questions from everyone, except Edward. He stayed uncharacteristically quiet, remaining in his spot by the fireplace and simply watching me. I kept my word to Emmett, though, and waited for him and Rosalie to return. Once they had, I sat on the hearth, my legs folded under me, wringing my hands. The others were all over the room; Carlisle and Esme stood stoically in the corner, Jasper sat with Alice in his lap on the sofa, Emmett and Rosalie found a spot on the floor, and Edward stood just to my right, watching me intently.

"You'll have to forgive me," I fidgeted with the hem of my jeans, "but I've never told this story to anyone, and I'm a little nervous."

"We understand," Esme comforted softly, "just take your time."

Glancing out the window, I noticed the deep fuchsia hues of sunrise brightening up the horizon. I closed my eyes, and called to mind a stormy night and the hotel in Vancouver…

I began my tale. "After graduation, I told Charlie I was going on a trip. When he realized I planned to go alone, he was furious. He questioned me about my itinerary, the purpose of the trip, why none of my friends were going. He wanted to know about Jacob, too. He and I had been close all year, and Charlie assumed it was more than friendship. When I told him he was wrong, and that Jacob and I had fought about the trip as well, Charlie really kicked into high gear. He forbade me to go because he finally understood what I was setting out to do…"

"_Why would you even bother trying to track him down?" Charlie yelled at me. "He left you, Bella! That kid convinced his entire family to move in the middle of the night, without a word! He broke you into a million pieces! Why in the hell would you go after him, and what makes you think you can find him?"_

"_I have ways," I told him, feigning confidence._

"I'd planned on making my way to Alaska, to Denali, to find your cousins. I knew it was a ridiculous plan, but I just thought… Well, I wasn't thinking. Ever since you'd left, I'd plotted and planned, thought up every possible scenario. I went through everything I remembered any of you telling me about places you liked to live, connections you had in other cities, where you were from, and I made lists of any conceivable location. I was going to find you, I just knew it.

I'd made it as far as Vancouver, and I was holed up in a motel because there was a vicious storm. I climbed into bed, studying bus and train schedules, and fell asleep. The next thing I remember is waking up chained to a pipe in an abandoned warehouse."

I stopped talking long enough to risk a glance around the room. All seven of them were staring at me, enthralled in my story. Their faces showed concern and compassion, except for Edward. He looked pained.

Taking a deep breath, I continued. "It was hours before I saw anyone, though I suppose he'd been there in the shadows all along. Riley finally stepped out from behind a large piece of machinery…"

"_I don't know what she wants from you," he snarled, stalking towards me._

"_Please," I'd begged, knowing from the instant I saw him what he was. "Let me go."_

"_I can't," he shrugged. "She wants you."_

"_Who?" I'd asked._

"_She'll be here soon," he said, pacing in front of me. He took in a long breath and smiled, "You do smell wickedly delicious." The irises of his eyes were dark red, and he appraised me with hunger. "She says we can't feed on you, though," he shrugged again, "not yet, anyway." He tilted his head to the side and smiled again, "Ahh, she's here."_

"I tried to turn my head, to catch a glimpse of the person he referred to, but something hit me, hard, on the side of the head, and I blacked out," I went on. "I woke up on and off for days. One night, I opened my eyes, and Victoria was pacing the floor, talking to herself. I remember feeling so scared and knowing if she had me, there was no way I was making it out alive. When she realized I was awake, she stalked over to me and slapped me hard across the cheek, and my head hit the pipe. I slept again after that. When I'd come around, sometimes, Victoria was there, taunting me, telling me it was only a matter of time before Edward would show up and she could finally kill me. I think she rambled about James some days, and some days she beat me up. She would slap me around and say things like 'Surely the little psychic will see this!'"

I noticed Alice wince when I said that. She knew, as did I, that if she had been watching for me, she _would _have seen. The sorrowful look on her face was almost more than I could bear. Averting my eyes, I stared at the slats of wood flooring.

"Time passed, I don't know how much," I said. "The sun rose and set, and Victoria tortured me, hoping Alice would see. Riley would come in every now and then with just enough food and water to keep me alive. Victoria grew angry, even more unpredictable and insane than before, with every day that you didn't come for me. I think she and Riley fought, but I don't remember exactly. I think that because of the night he came to me by himself."

Edward had begun pacing the room, but the knowledge of what was coming next, caused him to stop abruptly and curse under his breath. If it were possible, his actions were causing my anxiety to spike. I stopped my story and called to him.

"You have to stop," I implored him. "You're making it worse."

"I'm sorry," he whispered. Alice, thinking she was being sneaky, gave him a commanding look, and he came to stand behind me again.

"Thank you," I said, lifting my eyes to his. "Edward, it's done. There's no use getting all worked up over it, okay?" I needed him to be rational, to accept this was a telling of the past, not something he could have any control over. It wasn't as though we were together anymore, and I didn't need his protection. Edward gave me a small nod, and I continued.

"Riley came to me one night, and he was angry. I don't really recall everything he said to me, just the feel of it. He was furious with Victoria and weary of her plan. I do remember he said it had been three months, though, because I thought of Charlie then, and how worried he must have been about me. Riley ranted and raved, going on about how ridiculous it was to just keep me, waiting for someone who was obviously never going to come. He said he wanted to kill me, to put an end to it, so they could move on together, without me and Victoria's revenge as a burden. But then, his entire demeanor changed. He seemed to be having some kind of epiphany. Apparently, he finally realized he was a means to an end with Victoria, and that she had only ever wanted vengeance for James. He crept up close to me and knelt down, resting his chin on my shoulder and whispering in my ear…"

"_She wants to kill you in front of him," he said, "to get him back, but he isn't coming. I guess you don't mean as much to him as she thought." He laughed a brittle, cold laugh that sent shivers through me. "But I'm tired of her games. I could kill you, yes," he hissed, running a finger down my cheek and slipping my hair behind my ear, "but I think I'd make my point clearer if… I… just…" He punctuated his last words by tracing his nose along my neck, down towards my collarbone. Then, he sank his teeth into my flesh._

"I knew what was happening to me the instant his venom burned in my veins," I shifted to stand up, and moved to the window beside Edward, "and I had no fantasies about the inferno which would rage in my body. For three days and nights, I willed myself to stay as close to conscious as possible. I would not retreat into the darkness, choosing instead to commit as much of the transformation to memory as possible. Sometime along the way, I remember thinking aside from my screams and labored heartbeat, there were no signs of life around me, only silence. I wondered where you were, why you had left me to burn without the comfort of your assurances that I would be alright." The last phrase left my lips in a whisper, heard by all, yet spoken only to Edward.

He stepped close to me, and I noticed he was breathing strangled breaths, his scent washing over me in a whisper each time he exhaled.

"Bella," he murmured.

I cut him off, turning to the others and finishing my story.

"When I awoke, the light streaming into my new eyes was so bright it hurt. My ears rang with the slightest sound waves, my skin felt tingly and, strangely, alive. Sitting up, I searched the room, enhanced vision allowing me to see in every corner, every nook and cranny, in less than a second. I recognized the place I was in. Realizing any hope I had during the process was simply illusion."

Making my way across the room, and away from Edward, I said, "They were gone, Riley and Victoria. It was noon, so I waited until midnight and then I left, too. I didn't bother looking for them, I knew I was too thirsty, and I wouldn't be able to track them. Being in a city that size, with so many humans, I knew I just had to get out. I ran along the edge of town, careful not to breathe, until I was deep in the woods, where I found a herd of elk. And, the rest, as they say," I smiled when Emmett caught my eye and gave him a small wink, "is history."

**End Notes: So, I'm just gonna hide behind the couch and wait for your reactions...**

**As always, thank you for your continued reviews, alerts and general support! And don't forget to visit the FanFicAholics Anon on FB! :)**

**Merry Christmas, y'all! :)**

**~CBx**


	17. Chapter 17 Mayhem and Magic

**A/N: Okay, so I owe y'all HUGE apologies for this update taking so damn long! But Christmas, a death in the family, and a serious case of writer's block just got in the way! I'm sorry, and I don't expect such a lengthy absence again!**

**Claire Bloom really rocks my world, people! She helped with this chapter SO much, and has gotten me on the path to transitioning this story into its next phase! Thank you a million times over, babe! You are the BEST! xoxo**

**Pimpage at the bottom...**

**SM still owns, lucky girl! :)**

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**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN- Mayhem and Magic**

**Bella**

It felt like forever was passing as they stared at me. I couldn't help but notice how they all had the same look on their perfect faces - pity, laced with guilt. It made me almost regret telling them what had happened to me. Alice was sitting on her hands, staring into her lap. I approached her first.

"Hey," I said gingerly, "no pity party for Bella, or for you, alright, Al?"

"But if I…" she whispered, looking up to meet my eyes. I knew she still couldn't see me completely, but she was looking at me just the same.

I reached out and stroked her hair. "I mean it," I intoned. "No feeling sorry for me, and no feeling guilty, for any of you," I looked around the room as I said it, though I was careful to avoid Edward's gaze. "It happened. It's _not _your fault. I went off into the world searching for vampires. Besides, it's not like any of you had… peaceful transformations either. All of you went through something equally as terrible as I did, in your own way."

"Yeah, but…" Emmett interrupted.

"No buts," I told him, pointing at him as I stood. "I mean it. Nothing good will come from over analyzing it. You can trust me on that." I finally chanced a look in Edward's direction, thinking of all the times I had over analyzed it in the last five years. He was staring, though it was as if he were looking past me, into me, rather than actually at me. His expression was the hardest to read, and the most disconcerting.

Suddenly, I realized I was instructing them to do the one thing I hadn't been able to accomplish myself. I had blamed Edward from the moment I'd awoken- for leaving me alone, unprotected in a world I shouldn't have even known existed. I was insurmountably hurt that he didn't love me enough to stay and change me himself. I was angry at him for having made me love him so much, I would desert my father and my friends, my life and my future, to go on a crazed scavenger hunt. I had channeled the blame and hurt and anger into every memory I could scrounge up, and eventually, everything turned into one overpowering emotion- hate. And in that moment, in insisting they not feel guilty, I had a strange revelation.

I walked to where Edward stood, frozen where I'd left him by the window, and said, "We need to talk."

"Let's go," Rosalie announced, standing up from her spot on the floor. Emmett stood and followed her, the others tagging along.

When they were as much out of earshot as they were going to get, I turned to Edward.

He muttered under his breath, "You don't blame them."

"I don't," I admitted, "not anymore. I did, for a long time, I did. I hated all of you for abandoning me. I was angry when I woke up alone, with no one to help me transition into this new life." I walked to the window and looked out at the others who were standing in the yard. "But eventually, I figured it out all on my own. I gave up blame a while ago, but I was still angry and hurt. Now, though, it doesn't matter. This is who I am, what I am. Blaming anyone other than Riley and Victoria is pointless."

"But we…" Edward stammered, pacing behind me, "…If I'd just…"

"You left," I sighed, emotionless for the first time, "but _I_ decided to go on some wild goose chase. _I_ chose to believe I could find you, and make you change your mind. Victoria chose to kidnap me, and Riley opted to change me. And you know what, Edward?" I took a deep breath, bracing myself for his reaction to what I was about to say. "I'm over it. I'm over all of it."

"What does that mean?" He stopped pacing, and I could feel him staring at my back. His breathing was ragged, and I knew when I turned around I'd see his hands balled up and his brow furrowed.

I rounded on him and, mustering every last shred of dignity I could find, I squared my shoulders and said, "It means, when this is over, when Alice is better and we save Emily, I'm done. You can go back to whatever life you've made for yourselves, and I'll do the same."

"No, Bella," he breathed, stepping closer to me, "please."

_Again with the please, _I thought.

"We can be… I don't know… friends, I guess, until this is over. And after that, I'll keep in touch," I said, not knowing if that was a promise I could keep. "I'll email Alice and…"

"Bella, stop," he moaned, reaching to take my shoulders in his hands, "this is crazy. I'm not letting you go, not again."

"Edward," I warned. The electric shock which always accompanied his touch was shooting through my body, and the look in his eyes was desperate. I knew if he didn't let go, I'd likely agree to anything he asked. Thankfully, he dropped his hands and took a step backwards. "I can't do this again. I won't. This is what you wanted, a life without me in it, so when we're done here, I'll give you that."

"That is not what I wanted," he growled at me. "That is _never _what I wanted! I love you, Bella! I've always loved you. Every minute, of every hour, of every day, for the last five years, all I've thought about is you. I've wondered where you were, what you were doing, who you were with. And it's killed me all this time, knowing you were out there somewhere, thinking I didn't love you. All I've ever wanted was you, and I won't let you just walk away, not now, not after…"

"That's just it, Edward," I snarled back at him, "you don't get to decide for me anymore."

Before he could come up with a retort, Emmett opened the front door.

"Sorry, guys," he called, "but Jacob's back."

With no concern for Edward, I ran past Emmett, and into the front yard. Jacob was standing with Carlisle, and I caught the tail end of what he was saying as I approached.

"… so, it should be just that simple," Jacob concluded.

"What should be simple?" I asked, looking between them.

"Jacob believes he's found a cure for Alice," Jasper smiled, rubbing Alice's hand.

I launched myself at Jacob, wrapping my arms around his neck, and shouting, "Jake! You did it! Thank you!"

"Anything for you, Bells," Jacob whispered, hugging me back. He set me on my feet and turned to Carlisle. "Leah did some research, and if she's right, then all you have to do is mix this up," he handed over a piece of paper, "and Alice drinks it."

"Drink it?" Alice asked, wrinkling her nose.

"Well, we can't exactly inject it into you, can we?" Jacob smiled.

"No," Carlisle agreed.

"What is it?" Rosalie inquired.

"Wolfsbane," Jacob explained, with a rather deadpan expression on his face.

"Seriously?" Alice laughed.

"Classic," Emmett chuckled.

I shot them both a glare and patted Jacob on the arm.

"Wolfsbane?" I asked. "What is that?"

"Apparently, it's an herb," Jacob shrugged, "used to repel werewolves. It's also supposed to reverse shape-shifting spells, too. Of course, Alice wasn't actually cursed, but Leah thinks it will work."

"And Leah thinks this, why?" Edward sneered from the porch.

"Because," Jacob stiffened, reacting to Edward's attitude, "she's, like, the research Queen of the tribe. If Leah says wolfsbane tea is the way to go, I trust her." Edward glared at Jacob, and Jacob tensed up further, leaning into me and asking, "What's his problem?"

"It's me," I answered quietly. Then, turning to Edward, I practically hissed, "Jacob got us what we need to help Alice. Would it kill you to say thanks?"

"Hey!" Emmett's voice rang out, momentarily breaking the tension, "if you got the cure that means you're chief, or whatever, now, right?"

"That's right!" I cried, grabbing Jacob's arm.

"Yeah," Jacob said, not sounding nearly as excited as I did. "The council agreed with me about Sam so I… well, it's done. I'm in charge now."

"Chief Jacob," I mused, winking at him.

"Congratulations," Carlisle spoke up, reaching out to shake Jacob's hand. "And I think it was very respectable you went to the council, even though you didn't have to." Jacob murmured his thanks as he took Carlisle's hand.

"Yes, it was," Jasper agreed, moving to shake Jacob's hand as well. "I know what an undertaking that kind of responsibility is. Thank you."

"Okay," I huffed, "I'm missing another piece of the tribal puzzle again."

A light laugh escaped when Jacob answered, "Technically, I didn't need to go to the council to challenge Sam's authority, but I wanted their blessing before I… took control."

"How do you take control?" I inquired, suddenly envisioning a brutal death match. "God, you didn't have to…"

"No, Bells!" Jacob laughed harder, at my horrified expression I assumed. "It was nothing violent. All I had to do was declare my intentions. I stated claim on my birthright, and that was it."

"Hmm," Rosalie scoffed, "well, that's a little anti-climactic."

"Rose," Esme scolded.

"Hey, um," Alice interjected, "I hate to be all selfish, but could we get back to this Alice-has-to-drink-some-magical-tea-thing, please?"

"Sorry." Instinctively, I shot her an apologetic smile. "So, what do we do, Jacob?"

"Leah wrote it down," he said, nodding to the paper Carlisle held. "You just brew it up, and Alice drinks it."

"Just out of curiosity," Rosalie questioned, "what if Alice didn't drink this concoction? What would happen to her?"

"Rose!" Esme was a little more forceful that time.

"I'm just asking," Rosalie defended. "I mean, who's to say she can keep it down? What if she just throws is right back up?"

"Oh, God," Alice whined, "what if she's right? What _would_ happen to me, Jacob?"

Jacob shrugged his shoulders and gave Carlisle a meaningful look. "Nothing," he said.

"Nothing?" I asked.

"Alice won't get better," Carlisle answered.

"But she's already getting better," Jasper retorted.

"She is," Jacob agreed, "and she might regain a little of her sight, but she'll never be completely healed."

"No sight or visions?" Alice inquired.

"I'm sorry," Jacob lamented, "this really is your only chance."

"But how…" Edward spoke up, only to be interrupted by Rosalie.

"Shut it, Edward," she snapped. "Whatever your problem is, get over it. This is Alice's decision, not yours."

Edward growled at his sister, and Rosalie tensed up, narrowing her eyes and growling back at him. Jasper let loose a wave of calm, and after a moment, both Edward and Rosalie backed down. Emmett took Rosalie's hand, pulling her to him. Edward sat on the porch steps, clenching his hands together and twisting his face into its signature brooding expression.

"Alice?" Jasper asked, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Darlin', this is up to you."

"What do you think?" Alice whispered.

"I think we have to try," he answered.

Alice gave Jasper a sweet smile and reached up to palm his cheek. "Alright, then," she announced, looking over his shoulder, "I'll do it."

"But where do we get the wolfsbane?" Esme asked.

"Not sure," Jacob replied. "This stuff only grows naturally in the Alps. Leah suggested a magic shop."

"Magic shop?" Emmett beamed.

Rosalie slapped him on the back of the head. "Not like rabbits in hats, and trick handcuffs, you idiot," Rosalie rolled her eyes, as Emmett rubbed the back of his head and laughed. "He means a real magic shop."

"And how are we supposed to find one of those?" Edward piped up again.

I had the answer immediately, I just didn't like it. Begrudgingly, I answered, "Ashley."

* * *

Alice and I sat in my car, outside the Henrys house. I listened to the noises coming from inside, and determined Ashley was home alone. Reluctantly, we got out of the car and headed for the front door. I held Alice's hand in mine, guiding her up the crooked walkway.

"I wish I could see better," Alice lamented, glancing around. "Does it look very different?"

"Not really," I said. "You'll need to be careful inside, though, you know, different furniture and all."

Alice giggled, as I raised my hand to knock. Of course, I didn't actually have to knock, because Ashley flung the door open and cried, "Bella! You're back!"

"Hey," I greeted her. "Did you know we were coming?" I was still curious about Ashley's ability, and wondered exactly how it worked.

She laughed, "No, no freaky visions. I saw you parked out there. What took you so long to come in anyway?"

"Oh, we were just waiting to see if anyone else was home."

"You could tell that from out there?" Ashley asked, eyebrows raised and curiosity piqued.

_Damn it, Swan! _ I thought. _Don't give the girl any more rope!_

"Well, um…" I stuttered.

"We were just watching for cars, or anyone coming in or out," Alice saved me.

"Oh," Ashley said, sounding a little disappointed. "I thought maybe… well, nevermind. What brings you here?"

"We were hoping you could help us again," I began cautiously. "We need to find a magic shop."

Ashley's eyes lit up, and she started bouncing on the balls of her feet.

"Yeah," she giggled, "I know of one in Port Angeles, and at least two in Seattle. Wait, you do mean a _real _magic shop, right?" I nodded, and Ashley dragged us both inside. "Come on," she called as she headed up the stairs, "I'll look them up on my laptop."

In her room, Ashley turned on her computer and clicked on her internet browser. I sat on the bed, while Alice stood in the doorway, squinting a little.

"Alice," I whispered, "are you alright?" She nodded in response, so I turned my attention to Ashley. "If you can just write down the addresses, that'd be great." I didn't actually need the addresses written down, but wasn't about to explain my perfect memory to the girl.

"Oh, won't you let me come?" she begged.

"No," I said, attempting to channel my best, forceful, adult voice, "no way. Not happening." Ashley pouted and batted her long eyelashes at me. "Stop it," I laughed a little. "You're not coming. You're too young, and besides, I don't think your mother would approve."

"Oh, please," Ashley huffed, swiveling her chair to face her desk. "So, what do you need at a magic shop?"

"No questions," I pointed my finger at her. "We appreciate your help, but the less you know, the better."

"Grownups suck," Ashley sighed, as she typed the name of a shop into the browser window.

Alice chuckled, and I shot her a glare, again forgetting she couldn't really see me. She stood up a little straighter, though, and let out a tiny gasp.

"Hey," she smirked quietly, "I saw that… well, kind of…"

I smiled in return, waiting for Ashley to finish up. Two minutes later, she handed over a list as she sat on the bed next to me.

"Thank you," I said. "Really, this is amazing."

"Sure thing," she smiled. "Hey, Bella, can I ask you one question?"

I thought for a moment before I responded, "You can ask, but I'm not promising you an answer."

"Fair enough," she sighed. "I was just wondering… I mean, about Riley…" I wasn't happy with where this was going, and hoped she'd change her mind. Ashley fidgeted with the hem of her shirt before looking directly into my eyes. "Is he… like… you…"

"What do you mean 'like me'?" I asked, still wary of the direction the conversation was taking.

"You're… different than you used to be," she whispered, still staring at my eyes. "In all the old pictures, your eyes are brown, really brown, but now… and all of them," she jerked her head slightly in Alice's direction, "have the same exact eyes." Before I could stop her, she reached over and grabbed my hand. "And your hands, they're like ice," she said. "In all my dreams of Riley, I get the feeling he's cold, and…"

"Stop." I pulled my hand away from hers and took her by the shoulders. "Ashley, Riley is gone. I know that's hard for you to understand, especially with your dreams, but you need to trust me on this."

"But you were with him after…"

"I know," I insisted, "but it's complicated and really better if you don't know all the details, alright? I know it's not fair, me asking for your help, yet giving you nothing in return, but that's just the way it has to be. Please," I implored, "you can't ask any more questions, or do any digging on your own. Promise me."

Ashley looked from me to Alice and back again. Her shoulders slumped, and she sighed, "Alright. I promise."

"Thank you," I said. "Now, we have to go."

The three of us walked downstairs, and when we reached the door, Alice stepped outside first, shooting me a sympathetic smile.

"When will I see you again?" Ashley asked.

"You probably won't," I admitted. She was in too deep already, and I had no intention of making it worse. "The Cullens and I, we have something to take care of, and then we'll all be leaving Forks."

She looked up at me, sadness creeping over her pretty face. "Oh." She sounded defeated, and I wished I could have made things easier. It wasn't fair the way I'd blown into town and disrupted her life.

"I'm sorry," I said, leaning down to catch her eye. "I really am. You've done so much to help me and my friends. Thank you for keeping my things for me. You take good care of that rocking chair, okay?"

"Will you ever come back?" she asked.

I sighed, "I don't know. Maybe… some day."

Ashley wrapped her arms around me and hugged me as tight as she could. I smiled, realizing this is how it must have felt to Alice all those times I embraced her when I was human. Gently, I hugged Ashley back before quickly letting go and walking away.

* * *

Alice and I spent the better part of the afternoon driving to Seattle. It would have been quicker to run, but Alice couldn't just yet, though she insisted on going along. The first magic shop we found turned out to be more of a touristy place, full of candles and books and clothing. The second place was a little better, but had no herbs. The young man at the counter directed us to a small shop, one that wasn't on Ashley's list, on the other side of town.

"Just tell Meara that Jonathan sent you," he said. "I know you don't need this," he remarked as he wrote down the address, "but I don't want anyone to overhear. I'm only giving it to you because I know you guys are for real." He winked as he handed me the paper.

"For real?" I asked, smirking.

"Yeah," he lowered his voice to a whisper. "I know supernatural when I see it, and you two ladies definitely fit the bill."

I nodded our thanks, and Alice and I quickly left.

"Was _he _for real?" she laughed once we were back in the car.

Across town, I pulled up to a shabby looking building in a run-down part of town. Over one of the shop doors was a tiny sign that read 'House of Meara's'.

"Nice," I scoffed. "That idiot sent us to some carnival store."

We got out and walked to the door, assaulted by the scent of patchouli when it opened. A tall woman, who looked about a hundred years old, with long, silver hair greeted us.

"Ah," she intoned, "you must be Jonathan's new friends."

"I don't know about friends," I said, looking around the room. The small shop had walls of dark, real wood paneling and rugs with intricate designs scattered over the floor. The shelves, which reached to the ceiling, were lined with leather bound, ancient looking books. There was a small case at the counter, lined with purple silk and displaying various talismans and charms. Okay, so this wasn't a carnival store after all. My scan of the place had taken only an instant, and I turned back to the strange shopkeeper, "but he sent us, yeah. Are you Meara?"

"I am," she answered, carefully giving us both a detailed examination over her reading glasses. "It seems young Jonathan was right, supernatural indeed."

I was at a loss for words. In my years as a vampire, I'd grown fairly accustomed to dealing with humans, but I'd never encountered one so… odd.

Meara fingered the silver cross that hung from her neck and gave me a knowing smile. She stepped out from behind the small counter, her long skirt flowing in her wake.

"What's wrong with this one?" she asked politely, nodding towards Alice.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

"You've come for herbs, presumably for a potion," she spoke with a bit of impatience. "So, what's wrong with this one?"

"She's… sick," I responded carefully. I had no idea what, if anything, this woman knew of our world, and I wasn't about to give anything away. "We were told we needed to make a tea… with wolfsbane."

"Wolfsbane?" Meara raised an eyebrow at me. "Do you have the recipe?"

"It's just wolfsbane and water," I told her nonchalantly, leaving out the rest of Leah's instructions.

"Boiled over an open flame made of hemlock branches?" she inquired. "For exactly twelve minutes, to be drunk while still hot, from a cup made of pure silver?"

"How does she know that?" Alice asked, too quickly for Meara to hear.

"No idea," I replied in kind.

Meara laughed a light, joyous giggle, and smiled, "Ah, yes, it has been a while since I've had any of your kind in my store."

I was getting annoyed with her, mostly because I just wanted to cure Alice, and I snapped, "Do you have any wolfsbane, or not?"

"Yes, of course," Meara said. "I'll be right back."

She disappeared behind a velvet curtain to her right, and returned five minutes later with a small, leather satchel.

"How much?" I asked her when she placed the bag in my hand.

"It's on the house," she smiled as she wrapped her fingers around my wrist.

"Thank you," I said, pulling away, "but…"

Meara let go and gave her glasses a nudge. "I can see you are different than others of your kind," she commented. "Your money is no good here. Just do me one small favor in return?"

I eyed her cautiously and replied, "Perhaps."

She laughed lightly as she walked away, waving her hand to shoo us out the door and calling over her shoulder, "Tell Leah to keep her brothers in check, will you?"

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

**End Notes: Reviews make me write faster, so hit that button and let me know what you think! :)**

**Now for the pimpage... Look up these 3 amazing ladies and read their stories! They are crazy talented, and I promise you will NOT be disappointed!**

**Skychaser- her Remember Me Tomorrow is so original! I almost cry with each chapter!**

**xxTailoredDreamsxx- In Real Life... Her dreadlocked Bella and Skaterward are to die for!**

**Puppymama0909- Empire State of Mind... Her Jasper makes me drool!**


	18. Chapter 18 Seeing Clearly

**A/N: Not much new to say here, so I'll get right to it...**

**Thank you G, Sky and Claire for putting up with the ADD that was this chapter! :) And Claire, your little blue marks make my heart sing! ILY, babe!**

**Thanks to the hubs for being so understanding about my writing/beta'ing/time spent on FB with the FFA ladies and gents! You're the best, honey! :)**

**As usual, SM **_still _**owns.**

****

**CHAPTER EIGHTEEN- Seeing Clearly**

_**"To suffer woes which Hope thinks infinite;**_

_**To forgive wrongs darker than Death or Night;**_

_**To defy Power, which seems Omnipotent;**_

_**To love, and bear; to hope, till Hope creates**_

_**From its own wreck the thing it contemplates;**_

_**Neither to change nor falter nor repent;**_

_**This, like thy glory, Titan! is to be**_

_**Good, great and joyous, beautiful and free;**_

_**This is alone Life, Joy, Empire and Victory."**_

_**Percy Bysshe Shelley, Prometheus Unbound**_

**Bella**

Smoke billowed up in ghostly tendrils, swirling above us. The scent of magic and legend encased our circle around the small fire. Emmett and Rosalie rested quietly, holding hands. Esme sat beside me, thoughtfully watching the flames as they licked at the hemlock branches we had gathered. Carlisle kept an eye on the pot sitting in the middle, which served as our cast iron hope chest. Edward had taken his place across from me, and the heat of his gaze was warmer than that of the fire. Jasper held Alice on his knee, as she clasped a small object in her hands.

Esme had appeared with a delicate silver, baby cup. The vessel for Alice's salvation was the single, physical reminder Esme had of her lost child.

"I couldn't save him," she had whispered when she gave Alice the cup, "But perhaps this will help save you."

Between the silence, which covered our group like sticky mud, and Edward's unrelenting stare, my nerves were prickling. Jasper was trying his best to remain calm and hopeful, but his own anxiety was increasing. He was unconsciously projecting onto everyone, making the tension in the air palpable. Emmett had begun to shift in his seat, and Rosalie pursed her lips tightly. Edward was clenching his jaw to the point where I could almost hear his teeth gnashing, and poor Alice…

I could feel it affecting me, too. Then, I remembered what Jasper said about my deflecting his gift. I concentrated for a moment and, with a deep breath, shook off his influence.

"Jasper," I called softly. He looked over and caught my eye. "We're all a little scared," I said calmly, "but I have a good feeling about this."

"I'm sorry," he replied.

"Don't be," I insisted. "You're just sending out some serious vibes, and…" I let my words fall as my eyes travelled to Alice, who was bouncing her knees and wringing her hands around the cup so tightly, I thought she might crush it.

Jasper managed a small smile and gingerly removed the cup from Alice's grasp. I felt a shift in the air as he reined in his insecurities. Collectively, everyone's stress level became less intense. Alice stilled, causing Jasper to relax further.

Carlisle peered into the pot of water, which had begun to bubble.

"It's time," he stated.

I leaned over, handing him the leather satchel containing the wolfsbane, and we all watched as he emptied the bag into the water. The concoction hissed, white foam rising to the edge before settling into a rolling boil. Carlisle nodded to Edward, who reached into his shirt pocket. Pulling out a gold chain watch, he finally trained his eyes away from me.

For the first few minutes, everyone stared into the fire. Perhaps we were waiting for some kind of magical explosion. All we saw was a pot of tea. Deciding Alice needed to stay as calm as possible, I spoke up.

"I think we should start planning Emily's rescue," I said. I saw Alice's cure as a foregone conclusion, and figured we needed all the strategizing we could get. "Jasper, any thoughts?" I asked. I knew little of Jasper's personal history, but enough to know he had the most fighting experience.

Jasper glanced at Alice, who had perked up a bit, and shot me a grateful smile. "We'll need to surprise them," he answered.

"How can we?" Rosalie inquired. "They'll hear us and smell us when we get too close."

"True," he admitted, "but Bella knows the layout. She can help get us into a good position."

"And if we can get close enough for Edward to hear their thoughts," I added, "maybe we can find a way to distract them."

"That's a good idea," Carlisle said. "If only there was a way to use Jasper's influence on them, without it affecting us as well."

"If he went in ahead of us," Emmett offered, "maybe he could sway them enough before the rest of us get inside."

"But to hold them…" Jasper began.

Edward cleared his throat and said, "Six minutes."

Jasper didn't finish his thought, which we all knew would reiterate Carlisle's concern. If Jasper wielded his gift, he would be out of the equation, and even if I managed to handle my own emotions, everyone else would still be under his control. We couldn't risk that level of vulnerability.

There was a rustling in the trees behind us, and we turned as a whole toward the noise. Everyone went on alert, Jasper reaching an arm protectively around Alice, and Emmett and Edward rising to their feet. I took in a breath, having a good idea who was coming, and relaxed.

"It's Jacob," I told them.

A whoosh of air and energy permeated the night as three wolves phased into human form. Jacob, followed by Sam and Paul, stepped into the yard slowly.

"We come in peace," Jacob joked, holding his hands out in front of him, as he took in our stance.

I rolled my eyes as Carlisle greeted them, "Good evening, Gentlemen."

They walked towards us, stopping in unison twenty feet away. Jacob's eyebrows shot up, and he nodded his head approvingly. He attempted to step closer, but it was as if an invisible wall had been erected.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Can't come any closer," he shrugged. He turned his eyes to Edward and waved toward the fire as he commented, "I guess Leah was right."

Edward sneered and looked back at his pocket watch. "Three minutes," he said flatly.

Sam stepped up beside Jacob, who gave him a light punch to the shoulder.

"Dr. Cullen," Sam spoke, regret prevalent in his tone, "I owe you and your… daughter," he nodded towards Alice, "an apology."

Alice turned at the sound of his voice and spoke before Carlisle could, "As long as this magic tea gets my vision back, we're good."

Sam dropped his shoulders slightly and replied, "Thank you, Miss Cullen. I truly am sorry. I shouldn't have… "

"We know," Carlisle interjected, "and we were just discussing our options for getting your wife back."

"Just tell us what we can do to help," Jacob said. "I wish there was a way we could go with you."

"I want to be there," Sam added.

"I know," Carlisle sympathized, "and we'll work out a way for you to be nearby without alerting Victoria to your presence. We won't take any unnecessary chances, though."

"Thank you, Carlisle," Jacob said.

Edward flipped the watch in the air, catching it in his hand, and said quietly, "It's time."

The night grew eerily silent again as we all realized it was do-or-die time. Esme rose from her place and walked to stand in front of Alice. She put one hand to Alice's cheek and took the cup Jasper offered. Esme leaned over the fire and dipped her son's cup into the still boiling liquid. Returning to Alice, she knelt in front of her, placing the cup in her hands.

"That smells ghastly," Alice remarked, attempting a joke to hide her apprehension.

Jasper chuckled and rubbed Alice's back. "You can do this, darlin'," he smiled.

Alice took a deep breath, and the rest of us held ours. Bringing the cup to her lips, she tossed back the tea in one gulp. I had to smile at Alice's tenacity- the action reminded me too much of watching humans shoot liquor. Alice's face twisted into a grimace as she struggled to swallow. She shook her head and sputtered a cough.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

Nodding her head, Alice squeezed her eyes shut, fighting to keep the potion down. After a few moments, she calmed; her face smoothing and her shoulders relaxing.

"Jasper," she said weakly. She swayed slightly on his knee before slumping completely against his chest.

The Cullens and I were on our feet instantly, gathering around Jasper who held her.

"What the hell?" Emmett boomed.

"Her eyes are open," Esme, still kneeling, sounded hopeful.

To me, she looked almost like she did when she had a vision. She was there, but… not. Jasper shook her a little, trying to make her sit up, but she didn't budge.

Carlisle got in closer to examine Alice. He lifted her hand and watched as it fell limply into her lap. He repeated the action with her head, tilting it away from Jasper's chest only to have it loll back into place.

"It's as though she's unconscious," he said.

"That's impossible!" Rosalie cried.

I knelt beside Esme to get a better look. Alice seemed to be in some kind of trance. Her eyes were beginning to flutter, until they closed, long eyelashes skimming the top of her cheekbones. She looked… asleep. And it was a strange sight to behold. I couldn't recall ever seeing her eyes closed before, and it scared me.

"Carlisle," I grabbed at his arm, "her eyes."

"I see," he answered.

Edward peered over my shoulder, before spinning around and growling in Jacob's direction. The wolves had stepped closer, the magical ward lifting when Alice ingested the wolfsbane.

"You!" Edward snarled, pointing at Jacob. "What the hell have you done to my sister?" He shoved Jacob in the chest, causing Sam and Paul to go on the defensive.

Jacob waved them off and knocked Edward's hand away. "Lay off," he growled in return.

"Lay off?" Edward laughed sarcastically. "Do you see her?" he pointed over his shoulder. "That magic of yours was supposed to fix her, not kill her!"

"She's not dead, Edward," I chided, walking over to step between him and Jacob, "and you're not helping." Using my full weight, I pushed Edward back until we were away from everyone else. I was strong, but not stronger than he was, so I knew he had to have allowed me to remove him so easily. I stopped just around the corner of the house before starting in, "You need to calm the fuck down! Since the moment I saw him again, Jacob has done nothing but help! He saved Alice once already! When will you get over yourself and accept he's _not_ the bad guy?"

Edward paused a moment, looking at me intently before he replied, "Why are you so quick to accept and overlook everyone else's faults and mistakes, yet so intent on calling me out?"

His response threw me for a loop. I was about to protest, but considered, instead, what he was saying. He was right, I had been doing that. I had forgiven his family, and I'd forgiven Sam. But when it came to Edward, I guess I had always just expected… more.

"Because," I sighed, giving in a little, "I always held you to a higher standard, I suppose." Edward took a step closer to me and brushed my hand with his. Trying to ignore the reverberation which ran up my arm, I shrugged and looked at the ground, "Blinded, I guess…" I shook my head. I wasn't about to say what I was thinking, which was that his pedestal had been created all those years ago by my love for him.

Of course, seeing as how I decided I didn't love him anymore, perhaps I was being a little too hard on him. He still had no right to go after Jacob, but it really wasn't up to me to go around making him behave. Resolving to stick to my plan of being over it, I stepped away, so we were no longer touching, and added, "Maybe you're right."

Edward ran a hand through his hair and let out a frustrated sigh of his own. "No, you're right. Jacob has helped. I'm just… frustrated… and worried. If this doesn't work, and Alice can't…"

"Don't," I interrupted. "This _will _work." I mustered up my best I'm-sure-of-myself face and walked away. Over my shoulder, I called, "Now, come be a good brother, and play nice with the wolves."

Edward groaned playfully and followed. When we reached the fireside, the huddle surrounding Alice had turned into two groups- Jasper, with Rosalie, Emmett and Jacob, were keeping watch over Alice, while Carlisle and Esme were talking with Sam and Paul. Alice was in good hands, so Edward and I walked to stand beside Carlisle.

"So you see," he was saying, "we have some obstacles, but we feel confident once Alice is able to help again, we'll be able to rescue Emily."

"I don't know how to thank you, Dr. Cullen," Sam expressed.

"We've had a previous run in with Victoria," Carlisle explained. "Her mate kidnapped Bella once." Looking at me with all the love of a father, Carlisle continued, "So, we know how you feel. My sons destroyed James, and we believe this whole incident is her way of seeking revenge. I promise you, we will do everything in our power to make sure Emily is not lost to you."

Edward was standing so our shoulders were touching, as I considered what Carlisle was promising. I wanted Alice to be alright, just for the sake of having her back, but I also wanted her assurances that whatever plan we came up with would be a success. I remembered the fight with James, albeit not as clearly as the rest of them, and I took notice of Edward's wincing when Carlisle mentioned it.

Something happened while I was lost in my thoughts, because the next thing I knew, I heard a tiny gasp, followed by riotous laughter from Emmett and Jacob. I turned to where the others were with Alice just in time to see Rosalie pop Emmett on the side of his head, effectively shutting Jacob up in the process.

"What?" I heard Alice exclaim.

Rushing over, I pushed between the boys and smiled when I saw her, relief and pure joy flooding my insides. Her back was to me, but I could see her hands on her hips, and she was shaking her head at Rosalie.

"I've told you a million times, Rose, those shoes do not go with that blouse!"

Rosalie huffed, but smiled. Esme leaned into Carlisle's side and laughed. Edward walked around to rib Emmett about the knock to his head, while Jacob and the other wolves looked relieved. I attacked Alice from behind, wrapping my arms around her shoulders and leaning in to plant a kiss on her cheek.

"Good to have you back, Pixie," I laughed.

"Oh, it's good to be back," she sang. I let her go, and she turned on me. "You know, Bells, while we're on the subject," she wagged her finger at my all black outfit.

"We are _not _on the subject," I cut her off. "No more Barbie Bella for you."

"Fine," she said through narrowed eyes. She relented a little too easily, and I knew the topic was most definitely not closed, but rather tucked away for another day. I took the out, though, and walked over to Jacob, wrapping my arms around his waist and hugging myself to his chest. Sam and Paul watched warily as Jacob returned my affection. "Thank you," I whispered.

Jacob planted a small kiss on the top of my head, and I felt Edward's eyes shift to watch us.

"What do I keep telling you, Bells?" Jacob laughed.

"Yeah, yeah," I smiled, "saving my skinny ass, I know."

"Leah's going to be a bitch to deal with, now," Paul finally spoke with a chuckle. "No one at the res thought this would actually work."

"Speaking of Leah," I pulled away from Jacob, "the lady who gave us the wolfsbane had a message for her. She seemed to know Leah."

"Hmm," Jacob mused, "I'll have to ask her about that."

"I'm glad your friend is okay," Sam said quietly to me.

"Thanks," I smiled, "me, too."

Everyone took turns hugging Alice and thanking Jacob. Even Edward managed a graceful apology and offered Sam his assurance we would do our best to bring Emily home safe. Esme invited the wolves inside to sit in on our planning. Japer welcomed them, glad for any help they could offer.

Just as we were all headed into the house, Alice stopped and reached for Jasper's hand, rolling back on her heels. A familiar emptiness clouded her eyes, and I had to stop myself from giggling with excitement. After a moment, she was back with us, and she smiled.

"It's going to be alright," she told Sam. "We'll get her back."

"What did you see?" Sam asked.

"Enough," Alice grinned and skipped up the steps into the house.

Jacob and Sam looked to me for an explanation, but all I could offer was a shrug and a chuckle. There was no telling what Alice had seen, but it was obviously something good. I figured it was something in Sam and Emily's future which she didn't want to give away. Her exuberance made me giddy, knowing she was now confident in the outcome.

As I stepped onto the porch steps, Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me backwards. I spun around and landed in the grass, on my feet, inches in front of his face. It was a move, I thought, which would have landed me on my ass with a sprained ankle in my former life. I tried to free my hand from Edward's grasp, but he wouldn't let go.

"Bella," he whispered, his warm, honey infused breath washing over my cheek. His face was blank giving away nothing of his emotions, though it was apparent he was hiding something. I couldn't help but stare into his eyes, even as I scolded myself for doing so.

_Stop it. You're over it, remember?_

A tiny smile graced his lips, and he stepped a little closer to me. The excitement of getting Alice back had my defenses down, and the impressionable teenage girl inside of me felt like blushing.

"That was pretty amazing what you did with Jasper earlier," he smiled. "He told me you seem to be able to resist his gift, but watching you do it was incredible."

"I don't know about that," I admitted, "but he needed to chill before we all went insane with doubt."

"Still can't accept a compliment," he smiled again.

_He's got to stop smiling at me like that,_ I thought. Once again, I tried unsuccessfully to remove my hand from his.

"I meant what I said," Edward leaned his head to the side and studied me, "in the house earlier, when I said I love you. I'll go along with your 'friends' thing, but I'm not going to stop trying to convince you we belong together." His smile grew as he traced the back of my hand with his thumb.

_Jesus, he really is beautiful. No! Stop! You. Are. Over. It._

This time, when he smiled, there was a hint of mischievousness behind it.

"What's with the Cheshire cat grin?" I managed to ask.

"I'll tell you later," he replied, squeezing my fingers. Then he brushed past me and into the house.

I silently cursed myself. The feeling of his hand in mine lingered and fogged up my brain. Instead of going straight inside, I distracted myself with cleaning up the remnants of our fire. I picked up the pot and kicked some dirt onto the flames. Retrieving the silver cup from the ground, I wiped it off as I headed towards the porch. From outside, I could see Edward standing by the mantle, listening intently to the conversation around him. I sighed, and as our short, cryptic conversation replayed in my mind, a sobering realization came over me. Even though I was a vampire myself, and I had resisted as best I could, Edward Cullen still dazzled me.

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

**End Notes: *Hides behind the Mac* So...who's mad at Bella? Hit that pretty little button and tell me all about it! :)**


	19. Chapter 19 Honeybees

**A/N: So, it's been too long... Edward decided he needed a chance to speak, and he's a difficult little bugger! LOL**

**None of this, and I mean NONE, would be possible without the ever-amazing Claire Bloom! Honey, you inspire me with your encouragement, direct me with your guidance, and pump me up with your praise! I adore you, and there are no words quite good enough to thank you for all you do! :)**

**Special shout-outs this week to SkyChaser and Puppymama0909- HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MY LOVELIES! :)**

**As always, all things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

**CHAPTER NINETEEN- Honeybees**

**Edward**

Honeybees. That's what the sound reminded me of, a hive of honeybees. Bella's thoughts were still silent, but I'd noticed something… interesting. Whenever Bella got extreme - highly emotional or, in those rare instances she let her guard down - I could pick up the slightest tenor of a buzz. If I were fortunate enough to be very near her at the time, I felt the tiniest vibration inside my head.

I'd discovered it almost immediately, after our first conversation on the porch, when I'd grabbed her hand as she started up the stairs. The passing spark which followed overwhelmed me. Bella no longer felt warm, but she still felt… perfect. Her hand fit so well in mine, and as I tried to convey my secret, I wracked my brain for ways to hold onto her for just a little longer. The hum hit me then, as she contemplated my words. I'd dismissed it, assuming it was merely a reaction to finally touching her again.

I realized now, it was something much different.

Jasper had relayed to me his suspicions of Bella resisting his mood control, and I wondered… Perhaps my inability to read her mind wasn't a defect on my part, but an anomaly created by her own gift. If she chose to, Bella could deflect Jasper's powers. Bella treasured her privacy. Could she, however subconsciously, have been resisting me as well all along, even when she was human?

Carlisle had mentioned bringing Eleazar down to meet her, and the idea intrigued me immensely.

I'd grown accustomed to the fact Bella was a vampire, but the thought she might possess a power so rare she hadn't even discovered it herself was nothing short of exciting. Alice had said, on the day we'd met Bella Swan, she would be an extraordinary vampire. She swore she had seen it, though I was sure I'd changed the picture five years ago. I wondered how smug Alice must be feeling on the inside, knowing my actions had made no difference after all. She'd given me no indication, but I knew the day was coming when Alice would throw an 'I told you so' in my face. One day, I might learn not to bet against my psychic sister.

Many an hour had been spent since our reunion, pondering what Bella was thinking. I was, as always, desperate to know the inner workings of her mind. My curiosity was not solely based on my inability to read her thoughts. No, I wanted inside her head because she was the most complex, intelligent, willful woman I'd ever known, and I longed for a deeper understanding of her.

Throughout the years, I'd imagined what her thoughts of me might reveal. Did she focus on the happy times; holding hands in the hall at school, afternoons in the meadow, quiet nights when I'd snuck into her room to read her to sleep? Did she dwell on the unpleasant events; how my protectiveness had caused James to go after her, Jasper's almost attack, my leaving her alone and confused in the woods behind her house? Had she thought of me at all? Or had she done as I'd asked and gone on as though I'd never existed?

I felt now, of course, she had settled upon dwelling on the unpleasant. Her violent reaction to seeing me again, combined with her 'I'm done' attitude of late, confirmed that theory. The buzzing, though, had made me begin to wonder once more. Could I somehow be getting through to her? Was she beginning to see the transparency of the lies I told her that day in the woods? Were the happier times, the real, honest, deep feelings, rising again to the surface? Surely, I mused, if she were really over it, over me, her reaction would have been less emotional?

Attempting to gauge what Bella was thinking by eavesdropping on my family proved futile. They gave nothing away, if they knew anything at all. I didn't even try Alice, as she was usually the one to catch me fishing around in everyone's mind. With her incapacitation, though, she seemed to have passed the torch to Rosalie. If I looked at her a moment too long, Rosalie would smile, a perfected, I'm-going-to-kick-your-ass bitch smile, and recite automotive handbooks in her head. Jasper compelled me away from his mind, while Carlisle made it clear anything Bella had shared with him or Esme would remain confidential. That left only Emmett, and I was nowhere near desperate enough to rummage around in there.

Circumstances left me with nothing to go on, except the hum of Bella, when I was lucky enough to hear it.

I tried, after the first encounter, to get close to Bella whenever possible. With each day, as her anxiety over Alice's condition increased, the buzz would come and go with her proximity. Jacob Black's presence seemed to cancel it out, though, as if being near him brought Bella back into balance somehow. That thought infuriated me, and as much as I wanted to be grateful for Jacob's help, I found jealousy was the only emotion I could muster. Telling Jacob he didn't need to take over as leader of his tribe hadn't been out of concern for him, even if I made it sound that way. I had enough obstacles when it came to Bella, the worst of which being her unwillingness to forgive me, and I didn't need her to have any more reason to worship Jacob.

When I'd gone for Jacob, across the fire, about Alice, Bella once again came to his defense. It was then, when I'd allowed her to drag me behind the house, I finally had a breakthrough. She was standing so close, and the buzz in my head was getting louder the more she yelled at me. I'd turned the tables, though, calling her out for being so unforgiving, hoping she would let her defenses down and not ramp them up. Her face fell as she took in the truth of my words. I watched, optimistic, as she responded.

"I always held you to a higher standard, I suppose," she'd admitted. The noise was increasing, like the static on a radio just before you find a station. Brushing my hand along hers, the current we both knew so well igniting between us, she faltered as she muttered, "Blinded, I guess…"

And that's when it happened. The words were muted and grainy, but sounded exactly like Bella's voice.

"…_my love for you…"_

She stepped away then, and with the loss of contact, her words drifted into static again. I thought, perhaps, I'd imagined it, wanting so badly to know what was going on in her head that I'd created phantom thoughts to go along with what I wanted her to feel. There was only one way to find out, I had to try and make it happen again.

As everyone else made their way inside, I pulled Bella down from the steps, watching her land gracefully on her feet. I didn't need to read her mind to know she was thinking the same as I, she never would have pulled that off as a human. I stared into her eyes, willing any connection to form. She was high on excitement, since Alice was well again, and I hoped the fact she was staring at me with equal intensity meant I could break through once more.

The buzz amplified as I complimented her on calming Jasper down, and I caught the briefest notion of the words 'smiling at me' as she tried to reclaim her hand. When I let her know, without any doubt, I would not be giving up on her, on us, 'beautiful' slipped through the crackle, and I couldn't help but smile.

Bella seemed befuddled as she compared me to the Cheshire cat. Her smile, though, was radiant, and I finally knew I was onto something. I decided to encourage Carlisle to call Eleazar. If anyone could figure out Bella's untapped gift, it was him.

Throughout the night, as my family began discussing strategies to save Emily, I found myself thinking up ways to fix things with Bella. Just after sunrise, Jacob and his crew finally left, Paul saying something about getting his sister to school. That's when the idea struck me.

I pulled Carlisle aside and said, "I need to go out for a while." Carlisle looked at me suspiciously and silently asked if I was okay. "I just need some time to think," I lied, "to get my head out of this mess with Bella, so I'm ready to help with Emily."

Carlisle gave me a reassuring pat on the back and sent me on my way with the keys to the car he'd had Emmett rent. Driving from the house to the high school, I couldn't help but smile. In all our years together, my siblings and I had lived in many a town, gone to countless high schools, but Forks and the school there had always felt more right than any of the others. As I pulled into the parking lot, I noticed that the spot Rosalie always occupied during our time there was open. I slid the car between the lines and got out, heading for the office.

I heard her before I even walked through the doors.

"Good morning, Forks High School," she sang into the phone. "Hi, Mrs. Thomas… Jennifer is sick today? Okay, well, I hope she feels better soon, have a good day."

I stopped outside the office doors, ignoring the stares of the children who passed by me. Turning on my vampire skills, and gearing up for her reaction, I swung open the doors and walked inside. Jessica Stanley was standing with her back to me, pouring coffee.

"Excuse me," I said.

"One second," she returned, waving her hand from over her shoulder while she finished stirring. She turned then, and almost dropped her coffee mug onto the floor. "Oh my God!" she shrieked. "Edward Cullen!" Jessica frantically wiped the coffee from her skirt and laughed nervously.

"Hello, Jessica," I smiled. "I heard you were working here now," I turned on the charm quickly, hoping to up my chances of getting what I came for. "It's good to see you." I smiled again, this time looking right into her eyes.

"I-it's good to… see… God, Edward Cullen," Jessica breathed, the cup in her hand resting over her heart and her eyes glazing over just a bit. "I… I don't… none of us thought we'd ever see you again," she stammered. "Angela is going to freak when I tell her," she shook her head, as though she hadn't meant to say that part out loud. "I'm sorry," she laughed a little. "Where have you been? Wh-what are you doing back here?"

"I've been… around," I answered vaguely, "and I'm here because I was hoping you could do me a favor." I amped up the magnetism, and continued, walking closer to her desk and keeping my eyes on hers, "I need to see a student. She's a family friend."

Jessica sat her coffee on the edge of her desk, smiling dazedly, and nodded, "Sure thing, who is she?"

"Her name is Ashley Henry," I told her. "I'd like to take her out for the morning, if that's alright. I'll have her back before lunch period, I promise."

Clicking away on her computer, Jessica pulled up Ashley's schedule. Still staring at me, she picked up a telephone intercom and called to the classroom, "Mr. Molina, I need Ashley Henry for dismissal, please." She replaced the receiver and sighed, "I still can't believe it. How long are you in town? Is your family here, too?" She gasped suddenly, "God, Edward! Did you hear… I mean, do you know what happened…" Her eyes dropped from mine, and she twisted the hair at the base of her neck.

"To Bella?" I asked, dipping my head to catch her gaze again. She nodded silently. "I… heard," I answered.

"It was so awful," she whispered.

I listened in, to find if she truly meant what she said. Losing Bella had honestly been hard on Jessica. She was remembering their last night together, after graduation. Seeing Bella through Jessica's memories was difficult for me. Bella was smiling, laughing, but none of the emotion reached her eyes. No, they were hollow and empty, and Jessica had noticed.

"If I'd known what she was planning," Jessica said, "I… maybe I could have…"

"You couldn't have stopped her," I assured her.

She was looking at me again, and another thought occurred to her, "Did you know her father passed away?"

"Yes," I said. "I heard that as well. Tell me, though, what happened to Charlie?"

"He had a heart attack at the station," she explained. "I hate to say this, but I'm glad he was at work and not," she said sheepishly, "you know, at home, alone."

Just then, the doors swung open, and Ashley breezed in.

"Miss Stanley?" she started to ask. She saw me, though, and smiled, "Oh, it's you."

I released Jessica from my stare and greeted Ashley, "Good morning."

Jessica shook her head and asked, "You know Mr. Cullen, Ashley?"

"Oh yeah," the girl grinned. "What are you doing here, though?" she inquired of me.

"I'm breaking you out for the morning," I told her. "I've got a little… project I need your help with."

"Hmm," she mused. "Okay," she shrugged her backpack onto her shoulder.

"Thank you, Jessica," I turned back to her. "We'll keep this our little secret?"

"Of course," she nodded, letting one more nervous laugh escape.

"See you, Jess."

"'Bye, Edward."

When Ashley and I were safely inside the car, she turned in her seat and crossed her arms, staring at me in a most Rosalie-like fashion.

"What?" I asked.

"Ha!" She laughed. "Are you kidding me? What was that back there with Miss Stanley? You guys have some kind of voodoo magic or something?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," I stared straight ahead as I pulled out of the parking lot.

"Right," she huffed. "There's no way she'd let me out of there with you unless you pulled some kind of serious mind control."

It was my turn to laugh, "I can't control anyone's mind."

"But you did _something_ to her," she insisted, "I'm not stupid. I know magic when I see it."

"Jessica Stanley and I were friends in high school, that's all," I fibbed. "She trusts me."

"Uh-huh," Ashley chuckled. "So, what's this project? And where's Bella?"

"Bella isn't here, and she doesn't know anything about this little adventure," I said seriously.

"Oooh," Ashley sang, rubbing her hands together, "covert ops. I like it."

I wanted to know just how much this girl knew about us. I didn't think Bella had told her anything significant, but from what I'd gathered Ashley was rather astute and loved to ask questions.

"So, you thought I used voodoo magic on Jessica, huh?" I asked.

"I'm just saying," Ashley rolled her eyes. "I know what you are."

"I'm just a guy," I countered.

"Oh, yeah?" she retorted. "This town is full of stories and gossip about you people. The lady who sold us Bella's house said you were some kind of freak foster family, which I guess you kind of are, what with all the weird pairing up. My friend Sara's older sister said you're mafia, and that your dad being a doctor was just a cover so you could hide the bodies of all the people you've whacked."

"That's a new one," I muttered quietly.

"But, I met this guy last year, down at First Beach, he lives on the reservation, and he said…"

"Okay, that's enough," I interrupted her. "I get it." Knowing she'd talked to anyone at La Push meant Ashley probably had more correct information than even she realized.

"Then, of course, there's Bella's book," she continued without regard to my interruption.

"Bella's book?" I asked.

"Yeah, I found it when we moved in. It's got all this cool supernatural stuff in it. She flipped out when I told her my favorite part was the chapter on the Cold Ones." Ashley looked at me solidly, waiting for a reaction. When I didn't give her one, she went on, "Yeah, so, I noticed in Bella's old pictures, she looks different than she does now. Now, she looks… well, she looks just like all of you, all pale and golden eyes, and I swear to God, I've never felt anyone with hands so cold. Why is that, Edward?"

"Nope," I answered, "we're not here to talk about Bella… well, at least not like you want to talk about Bella."

"Then what _are_ we doing?" Ashley looked around and noticed we were quickly approaching the middle of nowhere, which was saying a lot for Forks. "And where are we going?"

"Some place quiet," I told her.

Pulling the car onto the side of the road, I parked and got out. Ashley followed close on my heels, and began asking more questions.

"Is this about that lady who's missing?" she asked as she stepped over a fallen tree trunk. "Or about my cousin and what I saw him do to Bella?" She attempted to look around me and at my face as I walked stoically ahead of her. "Oh, God, you're not like some creepy stalker perv are you? And you're bringing me out here to kill me?"

"Ashley," I said calmly and kept walking, "if I wanted to kill you, I wouldn't have to bring you out here to do it."

The sound of the leaves under her feet quieted as she stopped walking. I turned to see her, frozen in her spot, staring at me blankly. I stared back, one eyebrow raised in question.

Her lips curved into a sly smile, "Good one, Edward."

I chuckled, turning to cover the remaining yards between us and our destination. Pulling back a low branch, I gestured with my hand for Ashley to step in front of me. A small clearing appeared, and she walked into it, finding a patch of soft grass to sit on.

"So," she asked once she had folded her legs beneath her body, "are you going to tell me what we're doing now?"

I sat, mirroring her position, and sighed, "I need your help. In return, I'm going to try to help you as well."

"Okay," she drew out the word and opened her eyes wide.

"You get visions, right?" I asked. She nodded. "But you can't control them? You can't know when it will happen or make it happen, right?" Again, she nodded. "That's how it works with Alice most of the time," I said.

"Most of the time?" she asked, curiosity burning in her eyes now.

"Right," I answered. "Mostly, Alice sees someone's future only once they've made a particular decision about something affects them, or us. But sometimes, if she concentrates on a certain person, she can… sort of… extract a vision from her mind."

"That is so cool!" Ashley squealed. "Can she teach me how to do that?"

"Actually, I'm going to try and teach you," I explained.

"Oh," she shrugged, "Okay. What do we do first?"

"I need you to concentrate on someone," I told her.

"Bella?" she asked, leaning back on the palms of her hands and smirking at me.

"Yes," I smiled. "You seem to have a connection to her, so she should be easy for you to focus on."

"Uh-huh," she laughed. "So, what am I looking for?"

"Just her," I said, "in the future."

"How far into the future?"

"Doesn't matter," I shrugged. "Just picture her, immerse your mind in thoughts of her. Let everything else slip away…"

Ashley closed her eyes and sighed, leaning further back on her hands and tilting her head up towards the lone ray of sunlight filtering through the trees above. Shaking her hair out behind her shoulders, she took in a deep breath, slowly letting it out as she lay down in the grass.

"That's it," I encouraged her softly, "just think about Bella… can you see her?"

"Mmmhmm," she nodded.

"Good," I whispered, "now reach out with your mind, and try to persuade your gift to let you see her."

Her breathing grew steady, and she stretched her fingers across her stomach. I reached out just a little into her mind. I could see Bella there, pale and beautiful, in Ashley's thoughts. I saw how we appeared to humans all the time, but seeing Bella through this girl's eyes was like seeing her for the first time. Ashley definitely held Bella in very high esteem, so she wanted to help me. I felt a little guilty, using the girl and her talent for my own purpose, but I knew if she could expand her gift, she might see it as a win-win situation.

The air around us grew quiet as Ashley delved further into her thoughts of Bella. I pulled away from her mind and waited. Suddenly, Ashley took in a lungful of air and sat straight up.

"Are you okay?" I asked, worried I might have pushed her too far.

"That… was… awesome!" she shrieked.

Breathing out a sigh of relief, I smiled, "What? Did it work? Did you see something?"

Ashley stood, brushing off her jeans, and smiled slyly, "I think so."

"What happened?" I inquired.

"I saw her, like she is now…" Ashley began, staring past me, remembering what she'd seen, "and then, it was… all this light and bam! There she was." She smiled, her eyes alight.

"Could you tell where she was or what she was doing?"

"Not really," she said, shaking her head.

"Was she alone?" I prodded.

"No," she smiled again, softer that time. Her eyes focused on me, and she winked.

"Surely you can give me more than that," I teased her. I could hardly believe I was begging for information from a thirteen year old human girl.

"Alice was there," she responded, twisting at her hair.

"Ashley," I walked a step closer and grinned at her, "come on."

"Answer one question first, and I'll tell you what I saw," she retorted, placing her hand on her hip.

"One question?"

"Yeah," she said. "One question."

I quickly scanned her thoughts to determine if this was a deal I should make. Seeing no thoughts of supernatural creatures or mythical beings, I nodded, "Fine, one question."

"What happened between you and Bella?" I looked at her incredulously, and she laughed, "I know that's what this is about, why you needed me to do this. It's because you're trying to get back in her good graces for something, right?"

Shaking my head, I gave in. "Look," I said, "I know it wasn't exactly fair of me to bring you out here for this, and God knows Bella will be beyond angry at me if she finds out," I was hoping she would heed the warning in my voice, "but… yeah… Bella and I have… issues."

"Well that isn't exactly a news flash," she giggled. "I mean, anyone could see just by watching the two of you. I just want to know what you did to piss her off so bad."

Turning away from the girl, and completely disbelieving I was about to share any part of our past with her, I answered over my shoulder, "I left her."

"That was stupid," was her reply.

"Thank you for such an astute observation," I snapped, turning back around. She held up her hands and took a small step backwards. I sighed and pulled at my hair, "I'm sorry. It isn't your fault… And it was stupid."

"Well, if it makes you feel any better, I did see someone with her. I could lie and say it was you, and he did sort of look like you. But the truth is, it was a little hazy, so I'm not sure."

"Thank you," I said.

"No," she smiled, "thank you. Really, that was, like, the coolest thing I've ever done. Do you think Alice would help me do it again?"

"Perhaps," I said. "Now, let's get you back to school, okay?"

We walked in silence to the car, and once we were on our way back to Forks High, Ashley piped up, "Your brother was right, I guess."

"My brother?" I asked.

"Yeah, the big one, what's his name? Emmett?" I nodded as she continued, "He said you guys were good with weird."

"We are," I replied.

The rest of the ride was quiet, and Ashley got out at the school, waving goodbye and swearing she wouldn't mention our little field trip to anyone. I felt somewhat better as I made my way back to the house. Ashley had learnt a little about her gift, and I'd gotten a partially promising look into the future. At least she hadn't seen Bella ripping me to pieces, or off with someone else.

I pulled into the driveway and got out of the car, listening to see what everyone was doing inside. Before I could get to the front steps, though, Alice came barreling out, eyes blazing.

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen!" she screamed, pointing her finger at me.

Suddenly, having Bella rip me limb from limb didn't seem so unappealing.

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**End Notes: What did Ashley see exactly? And just how much has she figured out about the Cullens? Will Bella find out what Edward did?**

**If you're not already, GO NOW and join the FanFicAholicsAnon on Facebook! Hands down, this is the BEST group in the world! :) **


	20. Chapter 20 My Brother, The Idiot

**A/N: First and foremost- BIG, HUGE, GIGANTIC thanks to Claire Bloom for telling me this chapter doesn't suck! Seriously, your words of encouragement were soooo needed, and I am forever grateful! :)**

**We get to hear from the other girls in the family today, so I hope you enjoy seeing what Rosalie and Alice have to say! :)**

**As always, SM owns everything, I'm just playing in her sandbox!**

****

**Chapter Twenty- My Brother, the Idiot**

**Rosalie**

Priceless. That's the only word to describe the look on Edward's face as Alice charged him in the driveway. I'd seen it before – the look that he's somehow surprised the family psychic has his number - but, really, it never gets old. And, if I were being completely honest, I'd kind of, sort of, maybe a little bit, missed it. The last five years had been rather boring where Edward was concerned. Seeing as how he'd done nothing of consequence in that time, there hadn't been much occasion for Alice to bother keeping tabs on him.

Now, though, with Bella back, things were bound to get interesting again. One thing I could say for Edward - he rarely disappoints.

After Jacob Black and his pack of dogs left the house, Emmett and I had gone hunting.

The trip took longer than anticipated because, as Emmett so eloquently stated, 'Monkey Man needs some lovin', Rosie.' So, we took a slight detour into the forest. There's this really huge tree on the other side of the river, and…well, Emmett always loved that damn tree.

When we finally made it back to our property, we ran into Alice and Jasper, who looked like they were running away from something.

"Alice had another vision," Jasper told us.

"About Emily?" Emmett asked. Alice shook her head furiously, but didn't respond.

"About Edward," Jasper answered for her.

"Jesus," I groaned, "what's he done now?"

"I'm not sure," Alice sighed. "I just had to get away from Bella for a minute so I could try to figure it out."

"Well, what did you see?" I inquired.

"He was with Ashley," she began. I let out a huff and couldn't help but roll my eyes. Seriously, when would my brother learn to leave well enough alone? "The bad part is," Alice continued, "once I saw them together, Ashley's future got all murky."

"How do you know it changed?" Emmett asked.

A faraway look took over in her eyes, and she latched onto Jasper's sleeve. He spoke for her, "The other day, when Bella and Alice left Ashley, Bella asked her to try and see the girl's future. Bella was worried about her, but Alice said everything looked fine."

Alice snapped back to us and shuddered.

"I'm guessing everything is _not _fine now?"

"No," Alice sighed, "definitely not."

The four of us went back into the house, and Jasper asked Bella if she wanted to head out to the baseball clearing to practice fighting. Bella readily agreed once Emmett offered to tag along. I went in search of Carlisle and Esme, to fill them in on Alice's visions.

"Why would he go to the girl?" Carlisle asked. "Edward, above all people, knows the risk of bringing a human into our world."

Esme smiled gently. "For love, Dear," Carlisle looked to her, confusion in his eyes.

"He may be the smartest vampire," I chuckled, "but he's still a man," I patted my father on the arm and smiled, "He went to Ashley to try and coax a vision out of her."

"He wanted to see Bella's future," Esme explained further.

Carlisle hung his head and sighed, "Oh, Edward."

My parents walked away, and I went to the front door to sit with Alice and wait for the idiot to come home.

Just before Edward pulled up, Alice straightened up to her full four-feet-ten-inches and stormed outside.

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen!" she screamed.

I couldn't help it; I laughed. From the doorway, I could see the panic in his eyes.

"Alice," he said, "Just listen, I…"

"No, you listen!" She stood on her toes and pointed her finger in his face. "You have no idea what you've done!"

"Look," he attempted to defend himself, "I know I shouldn't have, but I had to…"

"Had to what?" she countered, standing up on her toes to stick her finger in his face. "Had to drag that poor girl back into this? I'd checked her future for Bella, to make sure she was going to be alright, and you know what? Everything was fine until this morning. Now, all of a sudden, she's all over the place! You had to screw up that girl's future just so you could _maybe_ find out if Bella will ever forgive you?" Her back was to me, but I could just imagine the way Alice's eyes narrowed as she spoke. "Do you think she'll forgive you for this?"

"All I did was talk her through a vision," he attempted to defend himself. "I didn't tell her anything, didn't answer any of her questions, didn't confirm or deny any of her crazy suspicions. She doesn't know anything today that she didn't know yesterday."

I stepped outside and heard Edward groan as he registered my presence.

"Give it up," I said as I walked towards them. "She's right. You're wrong. Deal with it."

"I don't understand," Edward whined, looking at Alice. "How could I have changed anything?"

"Seriously?" Alice asked, hands on her hips and head cocked to the side. "You know that every decision anyone makes has the potential to change the course of things. You, for example, put it in Ashley's mind that she can now will a vision to come to her, and she, in turn, now believes she can help us with Emily. But you know what, Oh Wise One? That idea is going to get her in trouble."

"Really, Edward," I interjected, "wouldn't it have been easier to just grovel at Bella's feet for forgiveness?"

"Shut it, Rose," he snapped. Turning back to Alice, he asked, "Can I fix it?"

"I don't know," she answered solemnly.

I felt Emmett's presence nearby and cleared my throat. "Um, Alice," I said, motioning with my eyes towards the trees.

"Great," she sighed. "Okay, not a word, got it?" She pointed her finger at Edward. As if it were really necessary to tell him to keep his mouth shut about something that would likely get him in to even deeper trouble with Bella.

"Hey," Bella called as soon as she cleared the tree line. "Where've you been all morning?"

Edward shrugged and didn't look her in the eyes. That boy could charm anything female walking on two legs, coerce information from a hardened criminal, lie to the Pope, but when it came to Bella, he was a stammering moron. "Just out," he replied lamely. Rookie.

"Out?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow and chuckling. "Visiting old friends?" She was joking, but Edward flinched.

Luckily for him, Emmett chose that moment to attempt to sneak up on Bella from behind. I say attempt because he was still a good three feet away when she turned, ducked, and barreled into him with her shoulder like a linebacker. He fell to the ground, Bella right on top of him. She pinned his arms down as she flipped her ponytail onto her back, laughing.

"I told you, Emmett, you're too damn big to be sneaky."

"Fuck," Emmett muttered. We all laughed when Esme called from inside, "Language, mister."

Emmett rolled his eyes, and Bella leapt off him, brushing the knees of her jeans clean of the grass.

"So," Alice changed the subject, linking her arm through Bella's, "tell me about practice."

"It was great," Bella said.

"I want details," Alice chimed.

Edward squinted for a fraction of a second, but I caught it, and as soon as Alice and Bella were inside, I whispered, "What did she say?"

"She wants you, me and Emmett to try and fix the… uh, situation," he replied.

"Great," I said sarcastically.

"We're going on a mission?" Emmett chuckled.

"Yeah," I said, grabbing the keys from Edward as he tried to open the car door, "and I'm driving."

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

"Will someone please tell me what we're doing?" Emmett asked for the tenth time since we'd left the house.

"I told you," I answered with an exasperated sigh, "we're going to try and fix Edward's mess."

"Okay," Emmett rolled his eyes, "but what exactly is this mess? What did you do this morning, Eddie?"

I smirked while Edward sneered at Emmett's nickname. He hated it when people called him Eddie. I, on the other hand, thought it was hilarious.

"I went to see Ashley Henry," Edward muttered.

"Dude!" Emmett chuckled. "What the fuck did you do that for?"

"I needed her help," Edward said.

"Seriously?" Emmett continued laughing, "She's, like, fourteen… and human. What could you possibly need her help with?"

When Edward didn't answer, Emmett looked at me. I tapped my index finger against my temple.

"A vision?" Emmett asked. "Are you kidding me?" I shook my head and smiled. "If you need a vision, why don't you ask Alice? You know she'll tell you anything you want to know. Well, I mean, except…" Finally, realization dawned on my hot as hell but not so genius husband. "Oh!" He began laughing in earnest, doubling over in the passenger seat and holding his chest. "This was about Bella!"

Edward sighed and slumped into the back seat. "Are we there yet?" he asked from behind his hand.

"Yes," I said as I pulled the car into the Forks High parking lot. "But I swear to God, Edward, if I have to make nice with Jessica Stanley, I'm calling Bella."

Fortunately, the clock read three-fifteen, which meant the end of day bell would be ringing in five minutes. As the students started filtering outside, I climbed out of the car and stood by the door. I drew some attention, of course, mostly from the human boys. I appeared eighteen, and while they were drawn to me, they were also apprehensive. A few smiled, but quickly turned the opposite direction when I smiled back. Finally, I saw her.

Ashley skipped down the stairs with two other girls. They almost made me laugh, reminding me of three copies of Alice. All dressed in the funkiest outfits - nothing matched - and their hair, well, Alice would have been impressed. As soon as she hit the last step, Ashley looked my direction and stopped cold in her tracks. She bid a fast farewell to her friends and made her way over to the car.

"Hey," she said, glancing around at the other kids who were now staring at her. "What, um, I mean…"

"It's okay," I smiled. "You're not in trouble or anything."

The girl breathed out a loud sigh, relieved probably. "Good," she said. She looked, then, into the car and saw Edward sitting in the back. She gave him a little wave and smiled.

"Oh no," I said, "no smiles for Eddie. _He's _in big trouble."

Ashley's smile morphed into a sympathetic look, and Emmett's laughter could be heard all over the parking lot. I slapped my hand on the door a little too hard, leaving a small dent. Ashley's eyes went wide, and she took a step back.

"Shit," I mumbled under my breath. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. Just, look, can we give you a ride home or something? We need to talk to you."

"Yeah, sure," she replied. "I'm supposed to meet my friends at the diner in thirty minutes to work on a Biology assignment."

I opened the back driver's side door for her and asked as she stepped in, "Mr. Banner still teaching Biology?"

"Yes," she said, stopping halfway inside the car. "Why?"

"Ask Edward," I giggled.

**Alice**

"So," Bella asked me once we'd gotten in the house, "are you going to let me in on whatever it is you told Edward back there?"

Damn. She'd picked up on that.

"Oh that?" I asked innocently. "It was nothing." I shrugged my shoulders and picked a piece of grass out of Bella's ponytail. "Honestly, Bella, a ponytail?"

"Hey," she said, playfully jerking her head away from me, "I was fighting with Jasper. I figured my hair was a weakness."

"Nice observation," I commented. "I'm sure Jasper was proud."

"Actually, he told me I should have put it in a bun," she frowned as she wrapped her hand around her ponytail and tugged, demonstrating how easy it would be to take her down with it.

"Uh-uh," I grimaced. "No way, no bun. You may be fighting for someone's life, but you don't have to look like a school Marm whilst doing it." I quickly shoved Bella into the bathroom and sat her down on the stool in front of the mirror. Removing the hair band, I ran my fingers through then started to braid it. "See?" I asked. "We'll just French braid it, and then we'll tuck it under; practical and pretty."

"Alice?" Bella eyed me in our reflection.

"Yes, Bella?" I answered without looking up.

"What aren't you telling me?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said as I secured the end of her braid with a pin to the nape of her neck.

"Alice," she said more forcefully, reaching around to grab my hand. "You're keeping something from me. What's wrong?"

"It's nothing," I said as I tried to walk out of the bathroom. "Rosalie is taking care of it."

"Does this have anything to do with whatever Edward was doing this morning?" she asked as she caught the sleeve of my dress.

"Don't worry about it, Bella," I said. "I've got it under control."

"Come on." She looked at me, pleadingly. "Did something change? Is it Emily?"

"No," I sort of lied. It wasn't about Emily, per se; that outcome hadn't changed at all.

"We need to move on this," she said, brushing past me to pace the hallway. "Waiting is only making things worse. We need to go in there, like, tomorrow and get her out of there. You saw it; we're going to save her, right?"

"I did," I answered. "And we will."

"Then what's the problem?" she asked.

"Really, Bella…" I attempted.

"Mary Alice Brandon Cullen Whitlock!" Bella threw her hands up in the air and huffed at me. I think she would have stomped her feet at me if she thought it would help.

"Fine," I sighed. "I had a vision this morning…about Ashley."

Bella stopped pacing and stared at me, eyes wide, fear racing through her mind.

"What about her?"

"Well," I hedged, "it wasn't terribly clear, I just…"

"Alice, please," she begged, "what happened?"

"Nothing yet," I said. "It's just… well, Edward…"

"Shit!" she cried. "Come on." She grabbed me by the hand and pulled me downstairs and towards the door.

Bella didn't speak the whole ride into town. I took a moment to look for Rose and saw her, along with Emmett and Edward, with Ashley at the diner.

"The diner," I said quietly.

Bella sped towards the only restaurant in Forks. When we reached the parking lot, I sought Edward out with my mind.

_Heads up, dumb ass._

I watched through the window as he registered the thought, turning his head and seeing us pull in.

"Bella," I said as we got out of the car, "take it easy on him, will you? For me? He really didn't mean any harm, and he didn't know what he was doing. He just… He lo-"

Bella held up her hand to stop me, "Do _not _say it, Alice."

Before we could get inside, the four of them walked outside. A tiny ray of sunshine peeked through the clouds, and I looked around for a safer place to have our little confrontation.

"Um, guys," I said, pointing up at the sky, "why don't we take this over there?"

I pulled Bella by the arm, all the while she was sneering at Edward. He didn't even look at her, the coward. When we reached the other side of the street, behind the bank, Emmett started chuckling. Rosalie slapped him on the back of the head.

"Sorry, babe," he said, "but have you looked at Bella? She's ready to rip his nuts off!"

"Language," I warned, eyeing Ashley.

"Thanks, Alice, but it's cool," Ashley smiled.

"Okay," I stated with as much authority as I could muster, "this is how this is going to work."

"No," Bella interrupted me. "I'll tell you how this is going to work. First," she turned to Emmett, "you are going to take Ashley wherever it is that she needs to be right now, because she certainly does not need to be here." She looked to Ashley and offered a small smile. "I'm sorry you've been dragged into our mess again, sweetie. But you have no business here, and I need to keep you safe."

"But Bella, I can help," the girl pleaded with her.

"You can't," Bella said firmly. "You shouldn't be here. You have no idea what we're dealing with."

"But I think I do," Ashley countered.

"Bella," Edward said quietly.

"Shut up," she demanded without even turning around.

"Seriously, Bella," Ashley stepped up, "I think I can help, really."

"Bella," Edward dared to speak again.

"I mean it, Edward," Bella hissed.

"But I tried it again in study hall," Ashley said, sounding very proud of herself. "And I think I saw something important, about that girl you're looking for."

"Bella," Edward sounded more emphatic that time, reaching out to spin Bella around.

"For God's sake, Edward! Will you shut up?" Bella snarled.

"He's here," Edward whispered so Ashley couldn't hear.

All of our defenses went on high alert, Rosalie and Emmett turning on their heels to scope out the woods behind us.

"Where?" I asked, putting myself behind Ashley.

Edward scanned the alleyway and the street beyond.

"I'm not sure," he answered softly. "I just know he's close."

"What the hell just happened?" Ashley asked over her shoulder.

"Shh," Bella commanded.

With all our senses concentrated on the woods, none of us heard him. The next thing I knew, I was flying over everyone's heads and slamming into the nearest tree. I heard Edward growl and Bella screeching out a "No!" I landed on my feet, just in time to see Riley grab Ashley by the hair.

"Hello, cousin," he drawled into her ear when she was secure against his chest.

"Oh my God," the girl breathed, looking to Bella with wide eyes.

"And look," Riley sneered, "four Cullens."

"Three Cullens," Bella retorted, her stare cold as steel.

Riley laughed icily. "Yes, yes, the ever independent Miss Swan," he corrected, "how nice to see you again."

"Let. Her. Go."

"I don't think so," Riley laughed again. "You see, it's come to my attention that my little cousin here has a very special gift, one that I think I can use to my advantage. One that I assume you've already used to yours."

"Leave her out of this," Bella hissed.

"I'm afraid I can't do that," Riley shrugged his shoulders. "Say goodbye to your friends, Ashley," he said.

And just like, well, magic, Riley thrust his hand forward and a huge plume of smoke appeared in between us. Bella ran forward but was stopped almost instantly by a large flame. The others ran around, while I grabbed at Bella to keep her from running straight into her death.

"He's gone," I heard Emmett call.

"Damn it," Rosalie muttered, kicking at the rocks on the pavement.

A few seconds later, when the smoke cleared, Bella lunged at Edward, knocking him to the ground.

"You idiot!" she screamed. "Why? Why did you do that? What was so important that you had to bring that innocent human girl even deeper into our mess? Couldn't you have just left well enough alone for _once_!"

Edward stood and walked with surprising confidence towards Bella. "I'll fix it," he stated simply. "I promise."

Emmett, Rose and I watched silently as Edward took tentative steps closer and closer to Bella before reaching out to place a hand on her shoulder. She stared up into his eyes as he promised her over and over again that he would fix it. Finally, she took a deep breath and spoke.

"Fucking right you're going to fix it," she said, brushing his hand away. "Alice, call Jasper. We're going to Seattle, now."

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

Speeding along the highway towards Seattle, I tried once again to make Bella turn the car around.

"Please, Bella," I begged, "we can't go in there half cocked. We need a plan. And back up. Jasper's working on it, but we need more time."

"Things have changed," she said through clenched teeth. "We don't have time, Alice. If anything happens to Ashley, I'll never forgive myself, or Edward."

I sighed and slumped in my seat, pulling out my cell phone as it beeped with a text from Jasper.

_Talk her down yet?_

I typed a quick 'working on it' and shut my phone.

"Bella, I mean it, we need…" My plea was interrupted by a sudden jolt of energy. The road ahead of the car faded away, and I saw Ashley in the warehouse. She wasn't restrained, but she was locked in a room, it looked like an old office. She was alone, and she was worried, but she didn't seem afraid. As fast as it started, the vision morphed. This time, I saw Riley and Victoria with Ashley and Emily. Next, I saw Bella charging into the warehouse. The final sight was…

"Bella!" I shouted as soon as my eyesight cleared. "Stop the car! Now!"

"What? What is it?" she asked without slowing down.

"I mean it!" I cried, grabbing the steering wheel and jerking it so the car skidded onto the shoulder of the highway.

Bella slammed the car into park and turned on me. "What did you see?" she demanded.

"You," I said as calmly as I could manage, "rushing the warehouse. You'll get them both killed," I said.

Bella shook her head. "No," she said, "you're just saying that so I'll go back."

"Have I ever, _ever _lied to you about a vision?" I asked. She shook her head slowly. "And I'm not going to start now," I said. "You need to turn this car around and go back to the house. We need a plan. We need help. Ashley being there changes everything, and we need to be on our best game when we go in there." Bella stared at me blankly, mulling over my words. "You know I'm right," I offered, taking her hand in mine and giving it a reassuring squeeze. "We can't do this, just you and me. We have to go back."

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

**End Notes: So, what exactly did Alice see? Will Bella listen and turn around? Will Edward EVER dig himself out of this hole? What do you think? Because I'm wondering myself! LOL**

**Reviews appreciated and adored!**

**Until next time (which, hopefully won't be as long as this time)...**

**~CB**


	21. Chapter 21 Reflections of Truth

**A/N: Okay, I know... too long. So I'll be quick here.**

**First and foremost, thank you to the BEST beta a girl could ever have- Claire Bloom, who makes this story what it is with her profound advice and irreplaceable guidance! I love you hard, honey! xoxo**

**Secondly- HUGE thanks to my lovely xXTailoredDreamsXx! She found me the musical inspiration for this one, as well as a title! If you're not reading her amazing fic, It's Real Life, you're seriously missing out! You can find the link on my page! :)**

**As always, I own a fabulous pair of sparkly flip flops, but NOT Twilight. :)**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE - Reflections of Truth**

**"Jumping to conclusions**

**Made me fall away from you**

**I'm so glad that the truth**

**has brought back together me and you"**

**The Best of me, The Starting Line**

**Bella**

Edward had crossed the line by going to Ashley. As I sped towards Seattle, even with Alice's incessant clamoring, all I could focus on was getting to her in time. It was bad enough Riley, and that bitch, had Emily; Emily who had entered into our world willingly. But even though she knew the full extent of the danger she might face, this didn't mean she deserved to get kidnapped. She was an adult who had chosen a life wrought with uncertainty and risk, but what relationship didn't have it issues**? **

Ashley, on the other hand, hadn't done anything. She'd been born with a gift, and had the unfortunate luck to move into my old room. If Diane Newton had shown her parents a different house, on a different day, Ashley would have been at the diner with her friends, working on Biology homework and gossiping about boys. No, strike that. She'd be doing those things now if Edward had left her alone.

_No, _I considered, _this_ _isn't his fault, either. You did this; you brought her into this, and you have to get her out._

"You'll get them both killed!" Alice's voice rang in my ears, harsh and tinny. I didn't want to believe her. I was going to save Ashley. However, Alice had a point; she'd never lied about a vision before. To be fair, she'd never lied to me about anything at all, so, I reluctantly told myself if Alice said we needed to go back, then needed to go back.

I wished I could cry.

_Funny, _I thought.

Five years of yearning to rid myself of any leftover human emotions, and now I wanted to cry.

"Damn feelings," I muttered.

"What?" Alice asked, staring at me blankly.

"It's my fault, me and my damned emotions. If I'd never come back here, never knocked on their door… if I'd just said goodbye to Charlie on my own, somewhere far away…"

"Stop it, Bella," Alice's tone was steeled yet sincere. "We all make choices. Yours may have influenced Ashley, but she helped us locate Emily, and you helped her realize she's not some kind of freak, just very special. As for Edward, well, he may not have acted wisely, but his intentions weren't bad." I flinched at her defense of what Edward had done. "This isn't what I saw earlier about Edward and Ashley, Bella. _This _is all Riley. I don't know how he discovered Ashley's gift, but he did. He chose to take her, Bella. This is _his_ fault."

"But she wouldn't even be involved if I…"

Alice held up her hand to stop me. "She's his cousin, Bella. It's possible he knew about her before we did." She sighed and looked at me pleadingly. "I get it," she said. "But we can either go around, and around about whose fault it is, or we can go back to Forks, get the others, and fix it."

As usual, Alice was right. It was entirely possible Riley had been watching Ashley before I had come back.

"Fine," I sighed. "But we're making a detour into Port Angeles, first."

"Where are we going?" Alice raised a tiny eyebrow in my direction.

I shot her a smile, making my decision clear to her.

"Nice," she agreed, smiling. "Back up."

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

Alice and I arrived back at the Cullens' house to find Edward pacing the front porch. The fact that he paced when he was worried, or upset had always intrigued me. Being a vampire, it fascinated me even more. Vampires didn't pace; it was far too human a response to stress. Seeing him, I recalled the first time another vampire had pointed out that I, too, paced.

_Piazza San Marco, Venice Italy_

_I had hacked into Renee's email once again to find yet another letter to my father. She was pleading with him to do something more to find me. She told Charlie if he didn't find "that Cullen boy" soon, then she would. The idea that Renee could accomplish such a thing was laughable. Renee had a hard time finding her keys in the morning. But I was still concerned she might actually try. Feeling edgy, I left my hotel and walked along the canals, ending up on the Piazza San Marco. As I paced the perimeter of the marble salon for the fifth time, I realized I wasn't alone anymore._

"_What's troubling you this evening?" her voice rand out softly from the other side._

_Looking over, I noticed her standing between two columns, directly opposite me. Her long, blonde hair caught the moonlight as she stepped out from her hiding spot. For a fraction of a second, she looked like… and I thought maybe… _

"_What do you want?" I asked, mentally kicking myself for even thinking such a thing._

_Laughing lightly, she answered, "Nothing at all. I was just out, getting some dinner, you know. And I saw you here, trying to walk a hole through the square."_

_Her reference to dinner, saying it as though she'd gotten pasta at a nearby cafe', made me want to scream. I hoped my distaste didn't catch her attention._

"_I try and make an effort to get to know any newcomers," she continued without missing a beat. "It's really not such a big place, Venice."_

"_No worries," I assured her, "I'm only passing through." I wanted to be sure she understood that I wasn't there to take her territory._

"_How old are you?" she inquired as she walked closer to me. "I mean, really?" She winked._

_Her appearance registered somewhere around my age, though she was obviously much older._

"_Twenty," I said._

"_Hmm," she mused, glancing over me in a strange fashion, as though she were examining the vintage on a bottle of wine. "So, what? Two years, then? Maybe three?" Her tone was friendly enough, she didn't appear to be playing games or looking for a fight of any kind._

"_Two years and twelve days," I murmured._

_She laughed again, "I remember keeping count like that, at first. You stop after a couple of decades, though. Or at least, I did."_

"_How long ago was that?" I asked. She may have claimed she didn't keep track, but I knew better._

_She chuckled then, louder and more heartily. "One hundred, seventeen years, seven months, and…" she looked up at the cloudless sky, "… nine days." Standing in front of me now, she extended her hand to introduce herself. "I'm Helen."_

_Even though it seemed strange, I reached out and shook her hand, responding in kind, "Isabella."_

"_Quite an Italian name for such an American sounding girl," she commented._

"_Yeah, well, like I said, I'm just passing through," I reminded her._

"_Calm down, Isabella," she smiled, "we're cool here. There are so many tourists, and really not too many of us. It's a little close to Volterra for most of our kind. God!" she gasped. "You __**do **__know about Volterra, right?" I simply nodded in response. "Good," she sighed, "because those are some creepy bastards and…" Helen's words died as she finally caught a glimpse of my eyes. "Well, how about that?" she noted, placing her hands on her hips and tilting her head. "I guess we really don't need to be worried about you, do we? Those eyes of yours… you're one of those 'vegetarians' aren't you?" She used her fingers to make little air quotes when she said the word 'vegetarians'. She narrowed her eyes in thought and muttered to herself, "Weird."_

"_What?" I asked._

"_Oh," she said, snapping her attention back to me. "It's just, well, I'd heard of you. I mean, not you in particular, but… I'd never run across anybody like you. Just last week, though, I met this guy with eyes like yours in Volterra. Come to think of it, he was a pacer, too."_

"_Last week?" I questioned. "In Volterra?"_

"_Yeah," she replied, "I went for the festival. It's a real riot, all the humans dressed up, with fake fangs and garlic around their necks. Anyway, there he was all pretty and brooding, pacing up and down one of the back alleys."_

_**Did she say pretty and brooding? **__I struggled to listen to the rest of her tale._

"_My friend and I asked if he wanted to party with us, but he wasn't interested. He said he had business to take care of. I watched him most of the night, standing outside the big door that leads to the castle, pacing. He was gone by morning, of course. I just hope they didn't let him inside. You know what they say, there's no exit to the castle."_

_Helen's story stunned me. Pretty and brooding, with eyes like mine; only one vampire fit that description._

_I said goodnight to her, politely declining her offer to go back with her, and meet her friend. Instead, I checked out of my hotel and caught a three a.m. flight to Japan._

"Hellooo? Bella!" Alice's sing-song brought me back to the present, and her hand waving in front of my face. Edward had quit pacing and was staring at the car, which we were still sitting in.

"Sorry," I apologized.

"Where'd you go?" she asked, after which she cocked her head to the side and wondered, "Is that what I look like?"

"Nowhere, I'm fine." I answered her initial query, then smiled, "and yes."

I quickly got out of the car, only to be rushed by Edward.

"Bella, I'm so glad you came back. Jasper's been on the phone with Jacob, and he's on his way," he informed me.

"Good," I said. "We need to move on this."

As I walked into the house, I overheard Rosalie talking with Carlisle. "I'm just pointing out, that we don't need any more humans involved. We need to do something about Ashley's parents. People saw us with her at the school, and at the diner."

"I imagine Riley took care of Ashley's parents already," I interrupted. Everyone in the room looked at me, either stunned or confused.

"You don't think he - " Esme started.

I realized then what I'd said and quickly corrected, "I don't mean like that, I meant he probably left a note, in her handwriting, saying she's gone somewhere, at least overnight."

"You mean like a sleepover or something?" Rosalie asked.

"Yeah," I said flatly, "or, you know, she went on a hike with her boyfriend. Something to be sure they don't miss her for a while."

Edward entered the room just as the words left my mouth. He put his hand just above the small of my back, not quite touching me, and sighed, "Bella."

Funny, I thought about stepping away, but…

_Sound familiar? _ I asked myself, glaring at him out of the corner of my eye.

He pulled his hand away and dropped his eyes to the floor. It was strange, almost as if…

The steady sound of a heartbeat grew faintly from the back of the house. Carlisle walked to the window and looked outside. He turned to tell us Jacob had arrived with Paul and Sam. I headed for the door with the others, but Edward stopped me.

"Will you please talk to me?"

"I'm pretty sure you know what I'll say," I replied, "so how about we just skip it?"

"Why are you being so stubborn?" he asked, increasing his grip on my wrist.

_Seriously?_

I rolled my eyes and said, "I realize that Riley taking Ashley really had nothing to do with what you did, but it doesn't mean I'm not still mad at you for doing it."

"Okay," he conceded. "But if you'd just let me explain –"

"Maybe," I sighed. "After. Right now, we need to focus on getting Ashley and Emily back alive. We can deal with… us… later."

_Shit. Did I just say 'us'?_

A tiny smile crinkled the edges of Edward's eyes.

"Fine," he agreed, letting the smile take over his lips as he released my wrist.

"What's that about?" I asked, waving my hand in a circle around his face.

He took a few steps backwards and wagged his eyebrows at me before turning to walk away.

Jasper walked in immediately with Carlisle and Jacob, heading to the study to discuss strategy. As I walked outside, I saw Emmett take Paul into the yard to practice fighting.

"You shouldn't see any action," Emmett said, "but just in case."

Alice had dragged Esme upstairs to find appropriate clothes for everyone, which left me on the back porch with Rosalie and Sam, since Edward had gone AWOL, or as Rosalie said, he was 'fitting in a little brooding before the big day'.

"So," Sam directed his attention to me, "I haven't really gotten the chance to say I'm sorry. About Charlie, I mean."

"Thanks," I said.

"He was a good man, your father. He loved you more than anything."

"He was." It was all I could manage to get out.

"Did you know he harassed the hell out of Jacob when you left?" I shook my head. "Charlie was convinced Jacob knew where you were and just wasn't saying. Things got a little… strained between him and Billy for a while."

"Please tell me they worked it out," I sighed before I could stop myself. I couldn't stand the thought of my father losing his oldest friend because of me.

"They did," Sam assured me. "In fact, and I hope I'm not over stepping by telling you this, but I'm pretty sure your dad knew… what happened to you."

"What?" I gasped. "How?"

"One night at Billy's," Sam began, smiling a little, "it was kind of funny actually. Jacob and Paul got into it, phased and everything right in the front yard. Billy and I were talking them down when Charlie pulled up. He jumped out of the car, rubbing at his eyes like he was seeing things." He chuckled at the memory. "Billy managed to get him inside while I handled the boys. Later, when I asked, Billy just said he'd set Charlie straight. He never explained exactly what he meant, but after, well, that's when Charlie finally stopped looking for you."

I had nothing to say.

"Was that supposed to make her feel better, or something?" Rosalie piped up, examining a fingernail. "Way to cheer up a girl. 'Your dad stopped looking for you because he found out you'd likely been turned into one of the undead.' Good job, dog."

"Actually," Sam sneered, crossing broad arms over his wide, bare chest, "I did have a reason. Bella, until that night, your father spent every spare minute of his day looking, searching for any shred of evidence that you were coming home, and even when he quit looking, he never gave up hope."

Venom prickled behind my eyes, and my chest tightened as he spoke.

"You're a lot like him," Sam finished, "and I know you won't give up on Emily."

"I won't," I promised.

"Jeez," Rosalie quipped, "all that just to say you trust her?"

I rolled my eyes and told Sam, "Ignore her."

Carlisle and Jasper came outside then, followed by Jacob and Edward. Jacob looked upset and Edward looked downright smug. I shot Jasper an inquisitive look, and he shook his head, smiling. Alice and Esme appeared, taking up their places beside Carlisle and Jasper. Emmett allowed Paul one sucker punch to the ribs before laughing and trotting over to where we stood.

Jacob came to my side and leant next to my ear. "Hey," he said, bumping my shoulder.

"Hey," I said.

"How's it goin'?" he asked nonchalantly, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

"Oh, you know," I laughed, "same old, same old."

I heard a low rumble from Edward, and looked up to see him staring daggers at Jacob.

"He really doesn't like me, huh?" Jacob asked, eyeing Edward.

"Not so much," I replied, "but the feeling's mutual, no?"

Jacob bobbed his head and smiled, "Fair enough."

"Alright," Carlisle spoke, "Jasper, Jacob and I have had a talk, and gone over what we believe our options are. We've gotten a map of the area where Bella says Riley and Victoria may have Emily and Ashley. It's a fairly run-down area, so we don't think there will be a risk of exposure for any of us." He looked to Sam. "Jacob has agreed it's best if you stay on the edge of town, both for your safety and Emily's." It was obvious Sam didn't like the idea, but it was expected, and he acknowledged Carlisle with a swift nod.

"I'll get as close as I can," Jacob took over. "I'll troll the perimeter with Paul. You'll stay back with Quil. We'll all phase so we can stay in contact."

"As for us," Jasper stepped up, "we'll go in two groups. Edward and Rosalie will be with Bella and me, and the rest of you will be together, behind us. Hopefully, Edward will be able to tell us exactly where they are. Then, Bella and I will go in alone, since I'll need to use my gift once we're in there."

"Your what?" Paul interrupted.

Jasper winked at me and smiled. Everyone around me suddenly seemed very relaxed. Paul actually stumbled a bit. I focused hard on keeping Jasper out of my head, centering all my energy into fending him off. When Alice started to giggle and Paul looked ready to fall over, Jasper blinked and the connection was broken.

"Did you feel that?" Jasper asked Paul, who was rapidly blinking his eyes.

"Yeah," Paul muttered, shaking his head. "That's pretty cool."

"I don't get it," Jacob whispered to me. "What's he talking about?"

I stared at Jacob, stunned, and Paul cried, "Dude! How did you not feel that? It was like… I don't know, I just totally blissed out for a minute."

Jacob shrugged his shoulders, "I didn't feel anything."

"How is that possible?" Esme asked. "Bella is the only one who can…" she stopped short and looked to Carlisle.

One eyebrow raised, Carlisle asked, "Bella, will you step over here away from Jacob?"

Still confused, I walked to stand beside Emmett.

"Okay," Carlisle said, "Jasper, try again."

Jasper concentrated on Jacob alone, his eyes hard and steely. We all watched as Jacob's face went from tight and nervous to relaxed and calm. He stayed that way for a few moments before Jasper released him.

Jacob rocked back on his heels and scrubbed his hands down his face.

"What the hell was that?" he asked.

"_That_," Alice said, "was Jasper's gift."

"Like I said," Paul nodded, "pretty cool, huh?"

Jasper walked over to me and draped his arm over my shoulder.

"Well, I'll be damned, Bells," he grinned. "Have you been holding out on us, darlin'?"

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

**End Notes: So...the flashback? Sam's little revelation? Bella? What say you, people? :)**


	22. Chapter 22 Mind Games

**A/N: So, I've officially become **_**that**_** author, the one who takes entirely too long to update. And for that, I sincerely apologize. Life got crazy, my muse went into hiding, and it took some time to get everything back in working order. I can tell you the next chapter is almost finished, though. :)**

**Claire Bloom- you are an angel, a goddess, a genius! This poor chapter was struggling when it got to you, but now it's a shining example of your MAD skills! I love you dearly, and appreciate you more than words can say! People, this woman is nine months pregnant, and still finds time to be an amazing supporter and guide! **

**CHAPTER TWENTY TWO- Mind Games**

**Edward**

Everyone was a mess; thoughts and suspicions swirling around in their brains like mini tornadoes.

Alice and Emmett were excited at the prospect of Bella having a possible ability. She was already planning all manner of 'getting to know your gift' sessions, and he kept saying how 'kick ass' Bella would be now.

Jasper was considering how such a thing could factor into our strategy to save Emily and Ashley. Thoughts of all the scenarios were running rampant through his head. He kept imagining what Bella might be capable of, since she'd apparently been able to block his influence from Jacob's mind just by standing near him, and thought I might go in with the two of them.

Esme was worried, watching Bella closely and pondering how a power might put undue stress on her. Ever our mother, she saw Bella as one of her own, and she was well aware of Bella's innate desire to take care of others.

As for Rosalie…well, she was annoyed, as per usual, probably because Emmett's focus was on Bella.

Jacob kept thinking about how he'd told Bella she was special, something about her being an 'extraordinary girl', and there being such a thing as an 'extraordinary vampire'. His thoughts bothered me the most. I should have been the one telling Bella she was extraordinary, if only she'd let me. My earlier insinuation, when I walked in on his powwow with Carlisle and Jasper, that I was making headway with her had been low, I'll admit, but he needed to hear it.

Carlisle had called Eleazar, and asked him to come to Forks as soon as he could. He agreed, saying he was already in Prince George, British Columbia, and would leave in a couple of hours, putting him at our house in less than six. The idea that Eleazar, whose own ability was to read the preternatural abilities of other vampires, would be at the house soon, was honestly exciting to me, especially considering the parts of their conversation I had 'overheard'.

I hadn't had much to look forward to in the last five years. Instead, I'd spent an inordinate amount of time wallowing, as Alice called it. Not a day had passed where I hadn't thought of Bella. I knew it wasn't good for me, that I needed to do what I'd forced her to do and move on. Knowing it, though, and following through had been two different things entirely. Nothing had proven that to me more than when I'd arrived at the house to a vampire Bella. For, as unparalleled as she was now, there was some part of me who missed the old Bella. I missed the way I could tell at least something about what she was feeling by the blush in her cheeks, how the slightest wind would blow the scent of her across my nose, and mostly, watching her sleep. Now, she was emboldened and sure of herself, confident in her decisions, which were all definitely _her _decisions, and she was beautiful. God, she was so beautiful. More so than I could have ever imagined, and I had imagined it many times. The fact she was a complete and total mystery to me now was the only downfall to her being a vampire. No longer did her heart rate or breathing, or the dilation of her pupils, give anything away. I was more lost with her than I had ever been.

And so, Eleazar coming was so very important to me. If he could read a gift in Bella, explain why I had gotten those erratic glimpses into her head, perhaps I wouldn't be so lost anymore. I'd yet to share the experience with anyone and hoped no one, namely Alice, had caught on.

Earlier, when Bella had been talking about Riley 'taking care' of Ashley's parents by leaving a misleading note behind, I'd heard the faint hum of her thoughts… _Sound familiar? _Guilt flooded me, knowing she was remembering I had once done the very same thing to Charlie.

The wolves were growing impatient, and I couldn't say I blamed them. I may not have had warm, fuzzy feelings for Jacob, but I certainly sympathized with Sam. If I had known when Victoria kidnapped Bella, I would have been as frantic as he was and definitely wouldn't have wanted to wait to rescue her. Sam was walking up and down the tree line at the edge of the yard when a cell phone rang inside his pocket.

Jerking it out, he grimaced when he saw the caller ID, and snapped the cover open.

"What do you want?" he answered tersely.

Of course, we could all hear the voice on the other end of the line when she said, "Well, that's certainly no way to greet the woman holding your wife, now is it?"

Sam held back a growl as Carlisle and I walked closer to him, listening and both begging him with our eyes to calm down.

Sensing Sam was regaining his composure, Victoria spoke again, "I'm just wondering where my ransom is. Really, Sam, my patience is growing thin, and your Emily is running out of time."

Silently, Carlisle implored Sam to not give anything away.

"I'm working on it," Sam replied. "The Cullens… they…"

"Are still in Forks," Victoria sneeringly finished for him. "Riley saw almost the entire coven just this afternoon. Tell me, Sam, why is it that your pack is so… incapable of catching one, teensy little vampire so you can get your wife back in one piece?"

"It isn't that simple," Sam said. "You know how fast they are, and with their added gifts…," Carlisle nodded in approval of Sam's attempt at deflection. "If you would, perhaps, consider some other arrangement," Sam pleaded.

"No!" Victoria hissed into the phone. "If I don't have a Cullen by midnight Tuesday…" Suddenly, a whimper could be heard from the other end of the line, and Sam winced. Victoria continued, and we could hear the distasteful pleasure in her voice, "midnight Tuesday, the warehouse district. I want a Cullen."

The line went dead.

Sam slammed the phone shut and shoved it in his pocket, rounding on Carlisle and myself. "You heard her," he snapped. "That's less than a day. We're running out of time."

"I know," Carlisle agreed, "but I promise you, we'll get her back safely."

Sam paced a few steps away, turned back and said, "Tell Jacob I'll be back." Then he ran into the trees, phased, and disappeared.

**Bella**

Everyone was freaking out. Apparently, I had a power, an actual power, with actual benefits. It seemed as though I could not only deflect Jasper's gift off myself, but also away from anyone who was standing close enough to me. Carlisle had called Eleazar, and as nervous as I was about the implications, I was anxious for him to arrive and ascertain what was going on. A couple of times, when I was sitting alone, thinking about what such a gift would mean to our mission, I noticed Edward sneaking closer and closer to me.

"What are you doing?" I finally asked.

He shrugged his shoulders and sat beside me on the sofa. "Just checking on you," he said. "What's going on in that head of yours?"

"Stop trying to read my mind," I sighed. "You know it's a lost cause."

"Is it?" he smiled. The corners of his eyes crinkled up, and one side of his mouth lifted a touch higher than the other, a sure sign he was up to something.

_What the hell is he talking about? _I wondered.

Brushing my shoulder with his, he whispered, "I'm talking about the fact that Eleazar thinks you might be a shield."

I glared at him, speechless.

"How did you…" I stuttered. "I didn't…"

"You thought it," he smirked.

"But… you can't…" Damn it, I just couldn't make a complete, coherent sentence form in my brain.

"Apparently," he chuckled, "I can. But only when you let your guard down enough, which you have been doing, and quite a lot more often when around me, lately."

"I don't understand," I managed to say.

"I don't either. Hopefully, Eleazar will be able to explain it when he gets here."

"So, that's why…" Suddenly, Edward's little smiles and acquiescences of late could be attributed to the fact he was getting bits and pieces of my thoughts. "All those smirks and innuendos about me forgiving you and…what did you say to Jacob earlier?" These thoughts overshadowed the fact that I had no idea what he meant when he'd said Eleazar thought I was a shield, and I forgot about asking for clarification.

He smiled at me, beaming with a genuine joy I hadn't seen on his face since we'd been so haphazardly reunited. His eyes were alight with excitement and he was leaning forward, elbows resting on his knees, hands tightly bound. "Bella," he said, leaning back against the sofa, "I need to apologize for what I did the day I left."

"No, Edward," I said, sitting up and away from him, firmly instructing my subconscious to wall itself up again, and hoping that's how it worked. "Don't, please. I'm really not in the mood…"

Edward cut me off with his hand over my mouth. "Bella," he said, "I'm not going to apologize for leaving." My raised eyebrow was the only response he got. "We can get into that later," he continued with a rueful smile. "Right now, I'd like to apologize for what I did to Charlie." My brow scrunched that time, and I wriggled out from under his grip. "I shouldn't have left the note saying we were out together. I knew you would try to follow me, and I should have made it possible for him to realize sooner that you were gone. Maybe then, they would have found you more quickly and you wouldn't have been out in the woods for so long, alone. It wasn't right."

"There are a lot of things about that night that weren't right, Edward," I sighed.

"You must accept," he said, his voice pleading and soft, "when I tell you I believed I was doing the right thing by leaving you; the right thing for you, anyway. I had no idea, Bella, of what would happen to you. I thought you'd forget about me eventually, move on and go to college…" he pondered his next words before he finished, "…find someone… marry…" Reaching across the back of the sofa, he picked up a strand of my hair and watched as it slid through his fingers, only to pick it up again. "If I'd known you were going to go looking for us, I would have done things differently."

"How differently?" I couldn't stop the question from coming out. His motions were distracting, and I was finding it difficult not to loll my head towards his hand. I kept pondering how he thought it was possible I could ever _forget _him.

"I'm not sure," he admitted.

I sat up a little straighter and asked, "Did it never occur that you might not be the only one who knows what's best for me?"

"Actually," he smirked, "I've had it pointed out to me on more than one occasion."

"And your response to that is…?"

"Contrary to what I'd like for you to think most of the time, I, in fact, do not have all the answers."

Rosalie chose that moment to interrupt, "Did Edward Cullen just admit he's not omniscient?" Breezing through the living room, Rosalie stopped in front of us and smiled. Seeing Edward's fingers in my hair, she cooed sarcastically, "Aw, are the lovebirds, well, lovebirds again?"

"Rosalie," Edward ground out through his now clenched jaw, "please go away; far, far away."

"Can't," she smirked and shrugged her shoulders impassively. "Jasper sent me to get you. Eleazar has arrived."

I couldn't believe so much time had passed already. It felt like only minutes ago Carlisle had called Eleazar, and now he was at the house. Suddenly, I was very nervous - thank you, human emotions - and felt rather like I was about to be put on display in a museum, or dissected in a science lab. I wondered just how Eleazar did what he did. Was there some sort of test? Or did he just 'know' when he met a vampire if they had a preternatural ability?

"Bella," Edward's smooth voice broke me from my thoughts, "just so you know, you're doing it again."

"She isn't _doing _anything," I heard Rosalie say. "What's wrong with you?" she inquired in my direction, snapping her fingers.

"Rose," Edward said quietly, "please, give her a minute."

"Honestly," Rosalie half-sighed, half-laughed, "you two…" and walked away.

"Thanks," I offered quietly.

"Any excuse to get rid of Rose," he chuckled lightly. "Seriously, though, you don't need to be worried."

"Stop it," I begged, "Even if you are getting bits of my thoughts, please, just stop answering unasked questions. I'm not used to it, and it's unnerving."

"If it makes you feel any better," he whispered, "and I can't believe I'm telling you this, but I think I have to be touching you for it to work so…"

"So," I sort of finished for him, "if I want to make sure you don't hear what I'm thinking then…" I placed my hand over his and gently disentangled his fingers from my hair.

"Like I said, I can't believe I told you that part," he smiled, letting the last wisp slide down onto my shoulder again.

"Thanks again," I said, "this time for being honest with me. Tell me, how did that feel? Was it painful?"

My weak attempt at a joke was thankfully cut off when Carlisle walked into the house with Eleazar close behind.

"So, Isabella Swan," Eleazar said my name as though it had some kind of meaning.

He and I were alone in the house. Carlisle had taken everyone, vampire and wolf alike, and gone for a long walk out into the woods. He said I deserved some privacy, and I couldn't have thanked him enough.

I was back on the sofa, only rising to shake Eleazar's hand, and physically shove Edward toward the door before reclaiming my seat.

"So…" I mumbled, wringing my hands together in my lap.

Eleazar chuckled, "It's all right, Bella."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

His smile was warm and kind as he answered, "I've already done what I need to do. I know what you are, what your gift is. I think Carlisle just wanted us to have some time to discuss what it means, and for me to offer some advice on how to use it."

"How?" I inquired. "You haven't done anything."

"It is an interesting gift, my own," he explained. "When I meet a vampire with extra abilities, I see them, in much the same way one might see another's aura. We, of course, have no auras, since we are technically not living," he added with a small wink. "However, there is a sort of spectral glow around those of us with talents, and I can see it. If I can touch the vampire in question, the nature of the talent is revealed to me."

"So when I shook your hand," I began.

"That's all it took," he smiled again. "I saw the faint glow around you as soon as I walked into the room. And when you introduced yourself, it came to me. You're a shield."

"What does that mean, exactly?"

"It means," he intoned, taking my hands between his own, "that you are a very special, young lady. Shields are quite rare, and while it may not seem like it, yours is an extraordinary gift indeed."

"I don't see how," I admitted. "Everyone else's gifts have a defined purpose and a concrete use. This, forgive me for saying, doesn't seem all that special."

Eleazar stood and walked across the room to look out into the trees. He studied them for a long moment before he turned to me, regarding me carefully.

"What the others can do is important, yes, and very helpful at times. But you, Bella, you have a strength and a power beyond what any of them have. Learning to use your shield will enable you to protect those around you, those you hold dearest to your heart," he said earnestly.

"No pressure there," I laughed lightly.

"Carlisle has told me what's going on, with the Quileute woman and the human girl," he said, coming to sit beside me again, "and Jasper's idea about using his gift on those who are holding them. You simply need to practice expanding your shield to include anyone standing near you."

"But I don't know how I do it," I revealed, "it just happened with Jacob."

"That's all right," he said. "You could start by telling me what you were thinking when you did it."

I didn't really know the answer, but decided to just tell him what happened. "Jasper was demonstrating his gift to the wolves, and he looked at me, like he wanted me to deflect him. You know, so we could show them how I could remain neutral. All I did was concentrate on keeping Jasper out of my own head. Jacob was standing right beside me, and I guess it just sort of filtered over, or something."

"Okay," Eleazar mused, "I want to try something." He went into the kitchen and came back with a small rubber band, placing it in my hand. "Pull on it," he instructed, "wrap it around your fingers. Be gentle." I eyed him curiously, but did as he asked. "See," he nodded toward my hand, where the band was twisted around my fingers, bending and yielding as I moved slowly and carefully, "you can stretch it, manipulate it into almost any shape, yet it holds together, embracing your fingers."

I watched my fingers move and twist the band, and tried to see his point.

"Think of your shield as pliable, like the rubber," he finally explained. "You can mold it, flex it and maneuver it around whatever you wish. Now," he took another rubber band and slid it over both of his hands, pulling it until it snapped in two, "you just have to remember your shield does indeed have a limit, a breaking point. If you stretch it too thin, it will collapse."

I stopped twisting the band, balling it up in my palm, and looked at him. "It sounds so simple," I said.

"And it can be," he smiled, "with some practice."

"I don't have much time," I sighed. "Victoria…"

"According to Jasper's plan, you only have to shield yourself and possibly Edward," Eleazar noted. "As long as he doesn't get too far away from you, it should hold."

"I have a question," I blurted out, suddenly recalling what else my power seemed to allow. "Edward… he said he's been getting glimpses into my head. He's never, ever, been able to read my mind. Now, though, it appears as though he's getting through somehow."

"Yes, well, just as your shield can be extended, it can also be withdrawn," he said.

"Really?" I asked.

"You and Edward have quite a storied past, Bella." I looked at him quizzically, and he smiled, "Carlisle and I are old friends. There isn't much I don't know about his family."

I shook my head and looked at my feet. "I'm not sure I'd say I'm Carlisle's family… not anymore," I said, surprised by the sadness in my own voice.

"Of course you are," he sighed. He crossed his arms over his chest and continued, "Edward doesn't need much of an opening to reach into your mind. Whatever little trick he's learned, I can assure you he will grab onto it, use it at every opportunity, and not just because he can. Edward's feelings for you are deep, Bella. You can trust me on that." He raised an eyebrow at me, causing me to wonder what he meant. "I can only imagine your feelings run much the same. Perhaps," he said, his smile more glinting, "it isn't a matter of him getting through, but of you letting him in."

I pondered Eleazar's theory for a moment. "Well, then can I… control that, too?" I stopped him with another question before he could answer, "And what did you mean I can trust you on how deep Edward's feeling are for me?" I couldn't help it, I had to ask.

"Of course you can control it," he replied. "Practice with it, play with it, learn to bend it to your will. For now, though, you should probably stick to extending it, at least until this mess is cleared up." He reached over and patted my hand, "As for Edward's feelings, I would suggest talking to him about that."

"I suppose you're right, on both accounts," I agreed. "I don't know what to say, how to thank you."

"Help save Emily and your friend, Bella," he said. "That will be thanks enough." Eleazar returned to the window and looked out. "Ah, they have returned," he said.

I was off the couch and by the window in a moment. There they were, all of them, headed back to the house. Suddenly, I wasn't ready to face the looks and the expectations, not prepared to deal with the onslaught of questions and requests for a demonstration of my ability.

"I… I need some time," I said, taking a step back. "I'm going out the front. I know they'll know, but…"

"Go," Eleazar smiled. "They can wait a little longer."

"Thank you," I whispered, and was out the door before he could even hear me.

I ran. Ran so fast and so far I wasn't entirely sure where I was when I finally stopped. The forest was black and thick, fallen hemlocks and mossy underbrush blanketed the floor. I looked around and listened, the night eerily quiet. I supposed the nearby animals had gone into hiding, catching my scent in the air. Sinking to the ground, I stretched out on the soft dirt and closed my eyes.

I tried to imagine my shield as a physical entity, covering my body like a halo, silvery and alive. Then I envisioned pushing at it with my mind, forcing it away from me a little bit at a time. The first time, I didn't make it very far, the circle snapping before I even reached the small tree trunk beside me. With each successive attempt, though, I could feel it expanding farther and farther away from my limbs, curling around the ferns and branches on the ground. Every time I would push away, I would focus on pulling it tighter and tighter inside myself on its return, until I could imagine it as a tiny ball in my chest.

Hours passed, and the sun began to rise, filtering tiny streams of light through the thick canopy. I rose and dusted off my jeans, deciding I'd practiced as much as I could for the time being. The true test would come when I returned and tried to bring more than fallen limbs into my circle of protection.

Walking up to the house, I was met by Alice, a worried expression on her face.

"What is it?" I asked, "Has something happened?"

"God!" she shrieked, "Where the hell have you been? Edward's nearly paced a hole in the dining room, and Esme is beside herself!" She wrapped her tiny arms around me and squeezed. Even though we were matched in every other way, Alice could still hug the breath right out of me.

"I'm sorry, Alice," I laughed. "I'm fine. I just needed some time."

"Well, come on," she said, letting go of my torso but grabbing my hand, "everyone is freaking out in there."

Edward met us on the porch, running his hand through his hair. "Bella," he sighed. "I thought you'd… well, I didn't know what to think when Eleazar said you'd gone."

"Oh calm down," Alice chirped, "I told you she'd be back. I just didn't know where she was."

The house was full; the Cullens, Eleazar, Jacob, Paul and Sam all waited inside. Alice looked at me expectantly; Edward, nervously.

"Bella, if don't feel you're ready…"

I took the sleeve of his shirt and thought, _It's Okay, I'm ready._

His eyes widened for an instant before he smiled.

Alice stared quizzically between us and huffed, "Okay, _what _was that?"

Without letting go of Edward's sleeve, I focused on my shield, building it up inside of myself. Looking directly at him, I noticed how bright his eyes were; he must have fed while I was gone. His hair glinted in the sunlight filtering through the trees onto the porch. He was still smiling, and he was just…

_More beautiful than my memory can ever recall._

Edward's expression didn't change. He said nothing. I smiled.

"Well?" Alice harrumphed again.

"Seems this shield of mine may be pretty handy after all," I chuckled, throwing a smile in Edward's direction.

"Did you just…?" He glanced to where his shirt was still firmly in my grasp. "But…"

"I told you I'm ready," I grinned as I let go and walked into the house, leaving him laughing and Alice calling after me.

Esme hugged me when I got to the living room. It was a motherly hug, the kind I so often missed when I allowed myself to think about Renee', the kind that told you no matter what happened or how long it had been, you were still loved. Eleazar's words came back to me.

"… _to protect those around you, those you hold dearest to your heart…"_

"… _Carlisle's family…"_

As I pulled back, I looked at Esme, so sweet and accepting. My eyes found Carlisle, so much like my father in his own way, Emmett and Rosalie, the overly affectionate teddy bear and his supermodel wife, Alice and Jasper, the rocks that held me close to shore, Jacob, a childhood friend who had grown up into an amazing protector, and finally, I found him, standing in the door way watching me; Edward. The reason my heart drummed in my chest until it didn't, the focus of so many late night walks and careless information seeking expeditions, the only being on Earth who could bring out both the best and the worst in me. In that moment, I knew the defined purpose and concrete use for my gift.

I would protect my family.

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

**End Notes: Thank you all for your continued support for me and this story! There's some big stuff coming, and knowing y'all are out there waiting for it makes it so much better! :)**

**If you're not already, go to Facebook and join up with FanFicAholics Anon- Where Obsession Never Sleeps! There you will find tons of fabulous ladies (and a few gents, too) who ooze awesome love and support for a multitude of fandoms! It is truly a special place to be!**


	23. Chapter 23 Preparations

**A/N: First of all, I'd like to say CONGRATULATIONS to my fabulous beta, Claire Bloom, on the birth of her beautiful baby boy! He is a gem, sweets, and I only wish I lived close enough to get to snuggle with him! :) Thank you for ALL you so, especially for finding time to polish this chapter with a brand new baby!**

**To the hubs- it's been a while since he got a shout, and that's just wrong. Thank you, dear, sweet man, for putting up with the late nights, the faraway looks on my face at dinner, the squealing like a little girl when an alert hits my email, and for just being, well… you. Love you, babe! :)**

**Enough with the gushy… SM owns…**

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**CHAPTER TWENTY THREE- Preparations**

**Bella**

It was noon on Tuesday, and Jasper had spent the last six hours practicing with me. He would gather everyone around, and spread them out, across the yard. Apparently, using his gift on a group was more difficult when they were separated.

Edward and I were placed beside him, behind him, and between him and the group. He had us stand shoulder to shoulder, back to back, and several feet apart. The further Edward got from me, the harder it was to shield him, but I never lost him.

I did, on occasion, also take in whoever he 'attacked' though. Keeping only Edward inside while he fought someone was proving tricky.

I only hoped Jasper was strong enough to compel both Riley and Victoria not to resist, at least until we could remove Emily and Ashley. After that, I wanted them to fight. I would kill them both, but not if they were under Jasper's compulsion. No, I wanted them fully aware and alert as I ripped them to shreds. I had plenty of my own, personal reasons to want them destroyed, and their recent transgressions were just the icing on the cake.

Finally, Jasper decided we had practiced enough, and sent us all out for a quick hunt before we left for Seattle. As the eight of us headed into the woods, I touched Edward's shoulder.

_You know, I always did want to watch you hunt._

He wagged his eyebrows at me and smiled.

_Bet I can take a bigger deer than you, _I smirked in return.

Edward stepped aside and bowed at the waist, waving his arm out grandly, and tipping his head, "After you."

"I don't know what's up," I heard Emmett chuckle as I took off, "but I got fifty on Bella!"

Racing through the trees, I could hear Edward fast on my heels. I turned my head slightly in each direction, taking in the scents around me. Half a mile in, I caught it - a herd of deer. Leaping into the closest tree, I took account of them - two fawns, one nice doe and one really big buck. He was at least 250 pounds, with a ten-point rack. Glancing over my shoulder to be sure Edward was watching, I winked at him and dropped from my perch. The doe and fawns skittered into hiding as I landed on the buck, breaking his neck swiftly before sinking into his flesh. When his veins ran dry, I tossed the animal aside and looked up to find Edward leaning against a tree twenty feet away. I stood, dusted off my jeans and walked towards him. Uncrossing his arms, he pushed away from the trunk and laughed.

"What?" I asked.

"I'm just wondering," he whispered, taking his thumb to my cheek to wipe a smattering of blood from it, "how hard you might punch me if I told you what I was thinking right now."

Shoving him lightly at the shoulders, I laughed, "Why don't you try and beat that, and then, perhaps, we can compare notes?"

With a distinctly Edward-like smirk, he took off running, his laughter filling the space he left behind. I ran after him, and keeping up wasn't easy. I realized that in our race beforehand, he'd seriously held back. Edward was fast, like, crazy fast. I wondered how I hadn't noticed it before, just how fast he was. Then, it hit me; I'd only seen him run when I was human, and all of the Cullens had seemed equally blinding at the time, especially considering I'd witnessed it from my perch on Edward's back. Now, however, I recognized for the first time how ridiculously quick Edward was. He bolted through the forest, whipping past branches and over fallen trees. He travelled so far in such a short span of time, that when he finally stopped, I could barely hear where the others were.

Leaping quickly into a tree, Edward surveyed the scene below. Halting about fifty feet from where he was, I took sight of the enormous animal he was stalking. Easily bigger than mine, the deer was drinking from a babbling brook, nowhere close to sensing the danger that waited.

"Bella," Edward whispered, his voice carried to me over the slight breeze.

"Yes?" My voice ghosted in return.

"What do I get if I win?" he enquired.

I reflected for a moment, pausing before I answered. "I'll tell you the truth… of how I feel… about you," was my reply.

The buck slowly lifted his massive head from the water, gingerly moving from side to side, awareness finally taking hold. Edward hesitated for a fraction of an instant, and in that instant, the buck hastened away. Surely, Edward could have easily caught him, taken him down, and won the bet. Instead, he smiled as the creature cleared out, saved for another predator - most likely a hunter with a large rifle and a big freezer.

I stayed rooted in my spot, wondering why Edward would give up such an easy opportunity. I'd offered him the thing I thought he wanted most; a promised glimpse into my psyche, and he'd let it slip away. Had my proffer not been good enough? I saw it, in hindsight, as an example of what Eleazar had suggested to me; it wasn't Edward _getting _in so much as it was me _letting _him in. I had known with certainty he could take the animal, and win our little wager. Why had I volunteered the one piece of information Edward seemed to desire most? Was it because I was longing to tell him, but needed an apparent 'no way out' situation in order to share those things which were nagging at the corners of my heart?

Edward was before me in a flash, eyes alight and boring into mine.

"Bella," he sighed, "don't toy with me."

I blinked and shook my head. "I wasn't," I said. "I… I thought you wanted…"

"Not like this," he murmured, "not because of a bet. If you, no, _when _you tell me how you feel about me, it must be on your own terms." Hooking his index fingers into the belt loops of my jeans he pulled me infinitesimally closer to him and, resting his forehead on mine, whispered, "I'm done making decisions for you."

I extracted myself from his grasp and walked ahead. "You owe Emmett fifty bucks now," I grinned.

"Looks that way," Edward returned a smile, falling into step beside me.

I should have been in a hurry to get back, to get on the way to Seattle. Instead, I walked about a hundred yards, as slowly as I could, until I gathered the courage to speak again. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything," was his reply.

"Three years ago," I began, the words sticking in my throat, "well, in June it would have been, were you… I mean, did you go to… to Volterra?"

Edward stopped walking, the tree branch under his foot snapping loudly in the quiet forest. He stared at me, brows scrunched up, head tilted in curiosity. I wanted him to tell me no, ask me was I insane for even thinking such a thing.

He didn't.

"How did you know that? _Nobody _knew that, not even Alice, surprisingly," he whispered.

I looked at my feet, twisting my fingers together, and sighed, "I was there. Well, not _there_, not in Volterra, I was in Venice, but it was two weeks later and …" realizing I was making no sense, I took a deep breath. "Okay," I began again, "it was like this…"

I told him about meeting Helen and what she'd said about the pretty, brooding, pacing vampire with the golden eyes. "I just assumed," I concluded, "it had to be you. Who else could it have been?"

"Did you think," he inquired, "that she looked a little like Rosalie? Because when I first saw her I…"

I cut him off with a loud huff followed by unexplained laughter, "Really? _That's _your response?"

"I'm sorry." He shook his head and laughed a little, too.

My composure regained, I said, "So, it was you, but why, Edward, why on Earth would you ever go to Volterra, voluntarily?"

"Things were…" he struggled to find his words, something which was completely un-Edward, "… difficult for me, Bella, after I left Forks. I didn't know how to function, how to be anymore. I told myself every day I had done right by you, even though I had destroyed myself doing it. There was one night in particular when I overheard Esme talking to Alice, saying how worried she was about me, how the reason she hadn't been to work in a week was because of me. I hadn't fed in weeks, hadn't left my room much in fact. I knew it was killing her, killing Carlisle and Alice, and it was hell on Jasper. I thought, in my self-involved state, I'd be doing right by my family if I left them too." He stopped for a moment, took my hand and watched, almost bewildered, as I slid my fingers between his. "It had been a year since I'd uprooted them. Enough was enough. I gathered my things and left that night. It was," he paused, "well, it should have been, your twentieth birthday."

"Hmm," I mused. "Where did you go?"

"Anywhere," he sighed, "everywhere. I wandered, until one day I found myself in Italy. I remember staring out the window of the hotel I was in and thinking I was so close to those who could just end it all. And I wanted it to end, Bella. I thought I could go on without you, but it didn't seem possible."

I considered his words, then asked the only thing I could, "So, what happened, then, in Volterra? Obviously, things didn't go as you'd planned."

"Eleazar," he answered plainly. "He was there by request of the Guard, to verify the talents of a vampire. He found me outside the castle. When I told him why I was there, he somehow talked me into leaving with him."

I remembered Eleazar's remark about knowing how deep Edward's feelings for me ran. This must have been what he was talking about.

"He put me on a plane the next morning," Edward continued, "made me promise to call Esme, and sent me on my way. I spent the next eighteen months traveling, never staying anywhere for more than a couple of weeks."

"Where did you go?" I asked, almost absentmindedly, simply wanting to prolong his story and get as far away from discussing Volterra as possible.

"Tokyo," he replied, "Lisbon, Cairo, Athens, Paris, Rio…" he chuckled as he continued to rattle off the list of places.

I slowed down next to him, letting my hand fall out of his, and stared ahead of me, calculating the odds.

"What?" he asked, turning back to face me.

"That's in order?" I inquired. "The places you traveled to, that's the order?"

He shrugged, "Yeah."

"And when you finally went back to the family, where were they?"

"New York," he said. "Why?"

"That would have been about eighteen months ago, then, right?" He nodded silently. "After New York," I questioned further, "Savannah, which didn't work out so well?" His eyes widened, then furrowed again; he knew no one had told me about Savannah. "And after that, Toronto, and finally Vermont, where you live now?"

"Yes," he answered, sounding as though he were trying very hard not to get exasperated with me. "Bella, what… did Alice tell you about Savannah?"

I shook my head and stifled a laugh until I nearly choked.

"I went to each and every one of those places, in that order, over the year and a half after I met Helen in Venice," I confessed. "Each time I would think, '_This _is where I need to go. _This _is where I'll find my place.' And each time, I would get there and spend a few weeks, only to discover something felt off. I thought it was because everywhere I looked, I saw you, and I was trying to get away from you. I tried not to see you ducking through low, narrow passageways when I visited the Pyramids, tried not to see you walking lazily along the Seine at midnight, or playing the piano sitting in the corner of the common room of that crappy hostel in London…"

"The King's Bed?" he asked, a disbelieving chuckle breaking through.

I stared for a moment, eyes wide in amazement, before shaking my head and continuing, "But I kept seeing you because you had done all those things, hadn't you?" Edward gave another silent nod. "I thought I was running away from you, but I was actually…"

"Following me," he breathed. He was centimeters from me now. His hands were at his sides, but he was leaning over me just enough so I could feel him all around me, wrapping me in intoxicating honey and cloves.

"Looks that way," I returned his earlier comment in a whisper, barely glancing up at him through my eyelashes.

We stood there, wrapped in a cocoon of wonder and questions, for what felt like ages, though it was merely moments. Out of the woods, Emmett burst through, laughing heartily, causing me to jump back a step.

"Whoa," Emmett bellowed, sliding to a stop a few yards away, "looks as though I've interrupted something. Sorry." He winked at me as I turned away.

"It's all right," Edward lied, straightening his spine.

"Okay then," Emmett shrugged, "Jasper says it's time to head back. We've been looking for you two."

I took off in the direction Emmett had come from, sparing no look for either of them.

"Here," I heard Edward say as casually as possible, followed by the distinct sound of money being crushed into Emmett's palm.

"Haha!" Emmett giggled like a teenage girl, "I knew she'd do it! Thanks, Bells!"

I ran the rest of the way back to the house alone, thankfully. The realization I had, however unwittingly, followed Edward around the globe was quite a lot to digest. I needed some time by myself to process and consider what it meant; surely it meant something?

I considered sharing this revelation with Alice, but thought better of it in the end. She would just gush over it, and I didn't need gushing. What I needed was for someone to explain to me _how _I'd managed to do it. How could I possibly have gone to every single place Edward had been, only missing him by mere days at times? And how did it stop? I pondered the idea for a fraction of a second before I had at least part of my answer. I had stopped it.

When I'd returned to the States, I'd gone to New York, and then Savannah, where I'd heard from others about the crazy vamp who had accidentally let some kid on the beach see him at sunrise, which made me instantly think of Emmett, and finally Toronto. After three weeks there, I'd decided no matter what I did, where I went, I'd never rid myself of Edward. It was really then when I'd gotten angry to the point of hating him. Nothing I seemed to do would erase him from my memory, from my… being. I became blinded by the obsession to obliterate him from my mind. I supposed that's what had caused me to choose my next destination; somewhere I thought Edward would never go, and that's how I'd ended up in Louisiana.

For some reason, the down-home simplicity of life in the marshy South seemed to me, to be too unrefined for Edward. It was the one place I couldn't imagine him, didn't see him in the face of every dark-haired young man. I'd managed to find a somewhat peaceful existence in a small town outside of Baton Rouge, which is where I remained until the fateful day I learned of my father's death.

I pushed the memories of that morning away as I cleared the trees behind the Cullens' home. The wolves were gathered, Quil had arrived and they were huddled together, Jacob barking commands.

"We're going in behind them," he was saying. "I'll get close enough so my scent will travel into the warehouse, but no one else. Victoria's only expecting one wolf, so that's all she's going to smell, understand?"

Paul and Quil nodded readily in agreement. Sam, more reluctantly, bowed his head and blinked slowly.

"Wait a minute," I said, approaching them just as Carlisle broke through the tree line with the others. I beckoned him with a wave. "Carlisle, I think we've forgotten something."

"What is it, Bella?" he asked, motioning for everyone to join us.

"Our scent," I said. "Jacob is the only wolf going near the warehouse because Victoria told Sam to come alone, but what about us? They're going to smell us, too."

"How did we not think of that before?" Rosalie asked.

"It's all right," Jasper smiled from the edge of the group. "I know what we can do."

"What?" I asked.

Jasper obviously thought his plan before he spoke because he didn't have time to respond. Behind me, Edward growled, not in anger but distaste. When he reached me, I eyed him and he shook his head.

"No way," he directed his comment over my head at Jasper.

Jasper chuckled and turned to our walking crystal ball, "Darlin'?"

Alice clasped her hands in front of her and closed her eyes. A moment later, they opened, glassy and fixed on something none of us could see. The tell-tale shift of her irises and fluttering of her lashes brought a quiet "How cool is that?" from Paul. Less than twenty seconds later, Alice was back, cocking her head to the side and smiling brightly.

"Sorry, Edward," she laughed, shrugging her tiny shoulders, "it looks like a solid plan."

"So," Esme inquired, stepping up beside Jasper and brushing a leaf from his sleeve, "what has my brilliant son come up with?"

Next to Edward, Emmett cleared his throat and pointed between the two of them.

"Hey," he feigned disappointment, clutching his chest, "what are we? Chopped liver?"

Esme gave him a disapproving look then blew him a kiss before urging Jasper to share his plan.

"Bella's right," Jasper said, "we'll need to conceal ourselves as best we can until the last possible moment. If we could mask our scents…"

Rosalie interrupted, "But how…?" Her eyes flew to Jacob and back to her strategizing brother. "Oh," she said flatly. "I mean, it's completely gross, but it just might work."

"Okay," Jacob stepped up, "why did the princess just look at me and call your plan gross?"

"Because," Jasper clarified, "Victoria needs to smell only you, so the three of us going in need to smell like you, too." Jacob crossed his arms over his chest and raised an interested brow. "If we mask our scent with yours, we'll be able to get closer undetected."

"And how exactly does that work?" asked Jacob.

"When we get to the city, we need you to… transfer your scent onto myself, Bella… and Edward," Jasper glanced cautiously at his brother.

"So, what?" I asked, "we need to, like… pet him or something? Sorry, Jake," I added quickly, casting him an apologetic eye, "didn't know how else to ask that."

Everyone except for Edward found the humor. Jacob walked over and slung his arm over my shoulder. He opened his mouth to say something, but closed it quickly. Shaking his head, he laughed, "Way too easy. I'm just gonna let that one go."

"Actually, Bella," Jasper answered, "that's exactly what I mean. The only way to mask our scent will be to…" he struggled for a word. "Okay, there's no good way to say it. We'll have to rub against him."

"Seriously!" Emmett choked down a laugh, "Too many jokes! You've got to stop!"

"You really believe this will work?" Sam directed his question to Alice, effectively cutting off any humor the rest of us found in the situation.

She nodded. "Jacob, carry Bella into the trees, not where we came from, but over there," she pointed to the opposite side of the yard. "Run in about fifty feet and circle back."

Jacob put his hand to his forehead and gave Alice a proper salute before he swept me into his arms. Draping my arm around his neck, I caught Edward's glare as Jacob headed away.

"Bet your boyfriend's wishing his gift wasn't so useful now," Jacob said when we were out of earshot. "Then we wouldn't have to get all up close and personal," he mockingly wagged his eyebrows.

"First," I said pointedly, "he's not my boyfriend."

"Whatever," Jacob mumbled.

"And could you please just cut him a little slack? For me?"

He didn't respond. We circled around towards the house, Jacob slowing as we neared the yard. I knew what he was thinking; I was thinking the same thing.

"How do I always end up being carried out of the woods by a wolf?" I tried to laugh, but it stung.

"Cullens," Jacob muttered under his breath.

We cleared the last tree, and I leapt out of Jacob's arms.

"I'm sorry, Bells," he shoved his hands in his pockets and kicked at the grass.

He looked like a kid, like the Jacob I remembered. A flash of memory, almost deja' vu, skittered across my mind. This was where I'd told Jacob I was leaving Forks. I hadn't told him where I was going, and he hadn't asked. He'd said he was sorry then, too; sorry for not being 'enough.'

I lost the chance to reply when Alice walked over with Sam.

"Go on," she encouraged, "follow Jacob's path and see if you can catch Bella's scent. Rose, you go too, just for good measure."

Rosalie agreed and walked towards the woods. Sam nodded to Paul, who followed. Once they had been swallowed up by the forest, Edward laid a hand on my shoulder.

"I wish it worked both ways," he whispered.

I focused for a moment, and thought, _You wish I could read your mind?_

"It would be advantageous right about now," he said against my hair.

_Or we could just learn to talk, like normal people, _I suggested.

"Yes, because we've been so good at that in the past," he chuckled into my ear.

Seeing Rose, Sam and Paul reemerge into the light, I stepped away and shrugged, "I said _learn._"

"Well?" Carlisle asked. "Did it work?"

"I could smell traces of her," Sam admitted, "but they were old. Any new scent was Jacob's alone."

"Yep," Rosalie concurred, "all dog, no Bella." She reached up on the toes of her stilettos and patted the top of Jacob's head. He shook her off with a light shove, smiling.

"That settles it, then," Carlisle said with finality.

"Good," Alice clapped her hands together. "Ladies, I think it's time to get dressed."

"Seriously?" I asked, looking down at my clothes, which seemed perfectly fine to me.

"Come on, dear," Esme wrapped her arm around my waist, "you didn't think Alice would pass up the opportunity to tell you what to wear, did you?"

"We'll be ready when you are," Jasper said.

"We'll be ready way before they are," Emmett laughed.

"Fine," I conceded. "Jasper," I called, pulling my keys from my pocket and tossing them behind me, "in the trunk, reinforcements."

Jasper caught the ring in mid air and smiled, "Don't forget her hair, Alice."

"Please," Alice scoffed, "I'm a professional!"

Esme whisked me into the house and upstairs. In what must have been record time, even for Alice, she had wound my hair into a French braid, securely tucked and pinned at my neck, and shoved me into what could only be described as an outfit made for an actual Barbie doll.

"Alice," I complained, tugging at the pants, "I like the black and all, but don't you think it's a little snug? I mean, it's a good thing I don't actually need to breathe."

"The tighter the clothes, the less there is for anyone to grab onto," she said matter-of-factly as she slid a final hair pin into Rosalie's twisted blonde mane.

"I draw the line at the shoes," I said, tossing the running shoes into the corner in favor of my boots. I laced them up just as Esme walked in.

"It's time," she announced.

Looking out the window I noticed the sky had darkened considerably. It would take us an hour to get to Seattle. If we left now, we could arrive with time to spare. As we gathered with the men outside, I stiffened when the scent of an approaching wolf hit my nose. We all felt the magic in the air as the transformation from wolf to human form was made.

A tall, slender, dark woman appeared in the driveway.

"What are you doing here?" Jacob asked. He didn't sound angry, but concerned. "You're supposed to be…"

"Emily is my cousin," the woman interrupted him. "I want to help, but since you won't let me go with you, I brought these." She held out her hand, giving Jacob a suede satchel. "They're talismans," she explained, "enchanted by Meara herself."

_Leah, _I realized.

Jacob emptied the small bag onto the hood of my car to reveal twelve small discs. He fished through them, separating them into two piles as he spoke. "This is Leah Clearwater," he tossed his head towards her. Leah nodded at our group and joined Jacob, taking a handful of the talismans and passing them out to her brothers.

"Tie these around your ankles," she instructed, "they're protection charms."

Without question, the Quileute men fastened the gifts to their feet.

"And for you," she addressed us as she retrieved the other items and held them purposefully in her hands. "These were charmed specifically for each of you, for your individual gifts. They will strengthen your powers, both physical and non."

Leah approached Alice first, dropping the small amulet into her opened hand.

"Glad to see you're back to normal," Leah smiled.

"Thank you," Alice replied. "And thank you for your help. There's no telling what would have happened to me if you hadn't given Jacob the wolfsbane idea."

Leah nodded graciously and moved to stand in front of me.

"Leah," I said, "I'm…"

"I know who you are, Bella Swan," she smiled. "You don't remember, but I actually babysat you a time or two, when you were very young."

Leah didn't seem old enough to have been my babysitter. Then I recalled something Jacob told me about the wolves not aging at a natural rate while they were actively phasing. Their own version of immortality, I supposed. I thought about how it would be to know that one day, you could just stop being what you were and go back to normal.

Leah brought me back to the task at hand when she held up a talisman, and wrapped my fingers around it.

"Meara says your gift is powerful, but new to you. This should help," she said quietly.

"How does she know?" I asked. "About my gift, I mean?"

Leah shrugged, "She's… Meara."

I felt a tingling in my hand which ran the length of my arm and throughout my entire body. The disc looked almost like an old coin - coppery and worn. The edges were slightly scalloped, and in the center was engraved a set of concentric circles. Newly etched into the innermost ring was a small B. From the looks on everyone else's faces as Leah made her way around, theirs must have been equally personalized.

I wondered how Meara could have known about everyone's strengths, how to enchant the charms. It didn't matter, I decided. The magic which had been infused to the discs was real and powerful; I could feel that much.

When Leah was finished, she hugged Sam and whispered something in his ear. We could all hear, but not understand, her Quileute words. Sam murmured a response in the same tongue, placing his hands firmly on her shoulders, and kissed her on the cheek.

"Well," Leah said, turning back to the rest of us, "you should get going."

"Thank you, Miss Clearwater," Carlisle said, holding up his talisman. "We appreciate your kindness."

"You can thank me by bringing Emily back alive," she smiled.

With a shared nod to Jacob, Leah ran down the driveway and disappeared in a shimmer.

"All right," Jasper pronounced, slinging the backpack from my trunk onto his shoulders, "let's do this."

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**End Notes: Thank you to everyone reading and reviewing and those of you lurking in the shadows! Your words and support mean the world to me! :)**

**THANK YOU to sherryola, who rec'd Home with the last chapter of her story, Seeing Bella! You must have some trusting readers, my friend, because my inbox literally exploded with alerts and reviews after your post! Seeing Bella is now on the top of my TBR list! :)**

**Rec of my own- Book of Misremembrances by QuantumFizzx This is an amazing, intoxicating Harry Potter fic that will have you begging for more! Read it! Now! :)**


	24. Chapter 24 It Ends Tonight

**A/N: If you're reading this- THANK YOU! Thank you for coming back! I apologize for the extreme delay!**

**G- Thank you for your unending support and constant prompts to keep going!**

**The Hubs- I love you, babe! Xo**

**Claire- Your support is unwavering, your praise like a ray of sunshine! I love you, doll! :)**

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**CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR- It Ends Tonight**

"_**A weight is lifted**_

_**On this evening**_

_**I give the final blow**_

_**When darkness turns to light,**_

_**It ends tonight…"**_

_**All-American Rejects, It Ends Tonight**_

**Alice**

We reached Seattle with time to spare. When we hit the city's edge, Jasper reminded everyone of their task.

"Carlisle, you and Esme will stay with Alice on the hill. Rosalie and Emmett will keep to the side street and one of us will call when we need you," he explained.

Everyone nodded, Emmett pounding his fist into his palm.

Jacob appeared then, having come from securing the other wolves' position.

"My boys are ready," he said. "Once I phase, we'll be in constant contact. Edward, I'll need you to be listening for me as well." He shed his t-shirt and tightened the thick leather strap around his ankle. I noticed it held not only the talisman from Leah but also an extra pair of pants. "Are you ready?" he asked.

Jasper eyed Edward, then turned to Jacob and nodded. Jacob took a deep breath, closed his eyes and began to disappear in a swirl of magic. His torso bent forward, his arms and legs elongated, his boyish face transformed. In a matter of moments, a large, russet wolf stood beside me. He shook his head and pawed at the earth, stretching.

Bella took a few steps forward and reached out her hand. Jacob leaned over and nuzzled against her, brushing his massive head along her chest, hair and back. Bella ran her fingers through his coat as he circled her. When Jacob decided Bella was sufficiently masked, he backed away and turned to Jasper. My husband stood with his arms outstretched as Jacob repeated the process, albeit in a much less friendly manner. Edward reluctantly stepped forward when Jasper moved away.

Looking squarely into the wolf's eyes, he spoke, "I'm sorry for my earlier reaction to this idea. Thank you for helping us."

Jacob gave a single nod, and Edward listened to his mental response.

"If I am so lucky," my brother replied, "you have my word."

This time Jacob answered with a glare and a response I was glad none of us could hear.

"Fair enough," Edward agreed with a chuckle.

With the three of them now ready to go, I looked carefully at Bella. She was staring at the warehouse district below, her eyes steady and fixed on a particular building. I'd worried about her the entire trip to Seattle, concerned for how she would feel once we arrived.

Returning to the place of one's transformation was never easy. I could only imagine how Bella would feel being back inside the place where she had been held captive, tortured, and ultimately changed. Knowing the same lunatics responsible for her fate were now holding and torturing two innocent humans had to be nearly unbearable.

"Darlin'," I heard Jasper whisper, "are you sure you can do this?"

I nodded and kissed him on the cheek. "Yes," I affirmed. "Go on."

Esme stepped up behind me, her hands on my shoulders as I sat on the cool ground. Crossing my legs beneath me, I rested my own hands on my knees. Darkness should have swallowed up my family and Jacob as they descended the hill. Any onlooker would see only a flicker of motion, catch a tiny whiff of something in the air. No human eyes could detect the shapes or register the speed. My eyes were closed as I attempted to see the not-so-distant future. The plan was for me to focus wholly on Jasper, hoping to get visions in almost real-time. I would relay what I saw to Carlisle, who would be ready when they needed help.

"All right," I sighed when the first glimpses hit me, "they're almost there…"

_Jacob took the lead with Jasper and Bella in the middle and Edward bringing up the rear. They approached with great speed, silently, stopping at the large bay doors which had once opened for shipments of fruit from Hawaii and fish from Alaska._

_Bella touched Edward's shoulder and he looked at her thoughtfully before he whispered quickly, "Alive; I can hear them both. Ashley's fine, Emily's afraid and, I believe, unconscious."_

_Bella nodded and smiled gratefully._

_From inside, Victoria announced, "Riley, be a lamb and get the door. We have company."_

_Edward pulled Bella to the side, out of sight, while Jasper stood directly behind Jacob. The heavy steel door creaked as it slid open. In the shadows, Bella winced, taking Edward's hand and squeezing his fingers._

_Jasper went to work immediately on Riley, whose face showed signs of slackening as he came into view. Bella was holding steady, managing to shield both Edward and Jacob._

"_Ah, Mr. Uley, I presume," Riley said once the door was completely up._

_Jacob nodded._

_Looking around and seeing no one else, Riley attempted a weak sneer, "Alone? Victoria will not be pleased."_

_He swung his arm in a mockingly welcome gesture. As Jacob entered, Jasper further influenced Riley not to sense the others. Inside the large open space, chains rattled, the sound echoing off the bare walls._

"_Alone?" Victoria huffed, walking into a sliver of moonlight. The expression on her face was fierce, highlighted by waves of fiery hair. She stared at Jacob long and hard._

_Jacob scanned the warehouse, catching a glimpse of an unconscious Emily in the corner. He growled lowly, baring his sharp canines at Victoria._

"_I was under the impression you wanted your wife back **alive**," she snarled._

_From the doorway, Jasper struggled to reach Victoria's mind. She was too far away, though, and he had to step inside._

"_He does," Jasper spoke, startling Victoria for a moment before his influence reached her as well._

_Bella closed her eyes and focused on Jacob as he walked farther inside the building._

"_Give us the humans," Jasper demanded politely, "both of them."_

_Victoria obviously felt Jasper's strong suggestion of compliance and tried to break free._

"_Riley," she struggled to say._

_Jasper interrupted, "Stay there, Riley, in fact, why don't you have a seat."_

_Without looking at Victoria, Riley leaned against a nearby wall and slumped to the floor._

"_No," Victoria resisted, "it's… he's…" she fumbled for words, and control of her mind, as Jasper bombarded her._

"_Where's Ashley?" Jasper inquired._

_Clenching her fists and trying desperately to move, Victoria was rooted where she stood. Jacob stepped closer to her, his chest rumbling._

"_In the back room," Riley supplied._

_Back on the hill, Carlisle quickly dialed Emmett's cell phone, alerting him to Ashley's location. He and Rosalie entered the building through a broken window in search of the girl._

"_You are so weak!" Victoria hissed in Riley's direction. "So fucking weak! I warned you about them!"_

_Riley ignored her, staring lazily at Jasper, as if waiting for his next request. Victoria closed her eyes and shook her head violently. "Get out of my head!" she screamed._

"_Give us Emily," Jasper smiled._

_Just outside, Edward responded to the mental call from Rosalie. Looking past Bella, who was staring into the warehouse, he saw Emmett carrying Ashley up the hill. Rosalie stayed back, not wanting to get too close to Jasper. Bella's strength was waning. She wouldn't be able to shield everyone for much longer. Jasper was tiring as well, and Victoria was putting up a good fight._

"_He can have the woman when you're dead," Victoria practically spat._

"_Get real," Riley laughed, still sitting on the floor, "they're all as good as dead."_

_Jacob let out a loud growl and swiped at Victoria with a massive paw. Flying across the room, she slammed into a rafter and landed on the ground in a heap. _

_It was the opening Edward had been waiting for._

_Leaping over Bella's shoulder and into the room, Edward had Emily in his arms in less than a second. As he pulled at the chains, Victoria recovered, gunning for Jasper. Knocking him to the floor, she broke his hold over Riley who stood, shaking off the haze of submission._

_Outside, with Jasper's influence broken, Bella lurched forward, leaning against the door frame for support. She was utterly exhausted; using so much of her newfound power had drained her. _

_Rosalie appeared at Bella's side, digging into the pocket of Bella's jeans for Meara's talisman. Pressing it into Bella's hand, the charm glowed dimly and warmed Bella's palm._

_Inside, in a whirl of motion, Riley lunged towards Jacob, who snapped with a resounding clap. He nicked Riley's shoulder, sending him back a few steps, as Jasper leapt to his feet._

"_Come and get me, Red," he taunted Victoria, momentarily tearing her between going after him or trying to get Edward away from Emily._

_Her hesitation allowed Edward to break the restraints and fling Emily over his shoulder. Emmett appeared in the side hallway. Victoria screamed as Edward gracefully tossed the still unconscious Emily into Emmett's open arms. Edward blocked the doorway, giving Emmett the precious seconds he needed to escape through the back._

_Riley took a swing at Jacob, knocking him squarely in the jaw before taking up Victoria's side. Edward and Jasper moved in, backing Victoria and Riley against the wall. Snarls and growls permeated the air, everyone crouched and circling._

_Edward spoke to Jacob as he recovered and joined the ring. "Go," he said._

_Jacob shook his head without taking his eyes off Riley. His response was silent._

"_Yes," Edward insisted. "Go. This is our fight now."_

_Jacob stood fast, leaning back on his haunches, ready to attack._

"_All right, then," Edward acquiesced._

_Victoria took advantage of Edward's distraction and lunged for him, her hands clawing at his throat. Riley sprung through the air set on keeping Jasper and Jacob at bay. Grabbing Jacob's thick coat, he swung around the wolf's neck, kicking Jasper in the stomach and sending him several feet across the room._

_Bella opened her eyes wide and gasped. _

_The scene before her was a melee. Edward and Victoria almost looked as though they were dancing, grasping each other's arms and twisting around one another in a tight circle. Victoria grabbed at Edward's clothes. Edward spun around and pulled her by the hair. She tried to take purchase around his neck, but Edward countered with a swift duck and jab to her abdomen. _

_Jacob managed to get the upper hand on Riley, pouncing on him from behind and holding him to the floor. Jasper lifted Riley up, securing his arms behind his back while Jacob rammed his muzzle into Riley's chest._

_Victoria caught Edward's arm then and, cartwheeling over his shoulder, she managed to get a strong hold on his throat. Edward struggled against her, but her fingers dug into his neck, and his eyes widened as her grip tightened._

_The talisman glowed brightly in Bella's hand, sending shock waves through her. Shrugging off Rosalie's comforting hand on her back, Bella stepped over the threshold and cried out._

"_Stop!"_

_All movement in the warehouse momentarily came to a halt, all eyes set on the woman striding gracefully into the large room._

"_Well, well, well," Victoria scoffed, "if it isn't Bella Swan." She further increased the pressure she was wielding on Edward's neck as she spoke. "Come to watch your lover die?"_

_Edward's knees began to buckle and Bella could see the veins darkening along his temples._

Forcing myself back to my present surroundings, I leapt to my feet and began running down the hill, Carlisle and Esme close on my heels. We reached the warehouse in seconds, just in time to hear Bella's response.

"Actually," she announced confidently, "it's you I came to see."

**Bella**

Honestly, the look on Victoria's face when I entered the warehouse was priceless.

Surely she knew I was with the Cullens? Riley had seen me when he'd taken Ashley. Maybe, for some reason, Riley had left my presence out of the story. Perhaps she believed Jacob, posing as Sam, had been naive enough to actually come without proper backup. Whatever the cause, her expression alone was almost worth the trip. Of course, her head on the opposite side of the room from her body was my ultimate goal.

Unfortunately, at that moment, Victoria was exerting a severe amount of pressure to Edward's throat. The veins in his face and temple were protruding and his eyes flashed wild and… was he scared?

I heard Alice and the others enter the room behind me, and relished for an instant in the anger that spread across Victoria's face.

"It appears we've been set up, darling," Riley choked out.

"Yes," Victoria sneered, "but I have something they want. Well," she glanced toward the back room, "two things, I suppose."

"Nope," Emmett responded from the side hallway, "just the one," he nodded, indicating his brother. "Oh, you mean the girl?" Emmett mocked. "Yeah, the jailbait has made a little jail break," he laughed.

Victoria shot daggers at me and tightened her grip on Edward. Apparently, losing almost all of her leverage didn't sit well.

"One snap and he's dead," she spat.

"Please," I scoffed, surprised at the amount of calm I managed to inject into my voice, "if you were going to kill him, he'd be dead already. He's not the one you really want anyway."

"He deserves to pay for what he did," she hissed.

"Actually," Alice interjected with a sly smile, "Edward may have caught James and stopped him from killing Bella, but technically, I'm the one who ripped his head off and tossed it into a fire."

"And since I'm the one James was after," I added, "wouldn't your anger be better placed on me? That is, after all, why you kidnapped me five years ago isn't it? Because James was willing to do anything to get _me_?"

"You said they attacked you!" Riley yelled.

"You were jealous, weren't you?" I prodded, ignoring Riley's outburst. "Jealous over a simple, human girl grabbing his attention so quickly, and that he left you in Forks while he lured me to Phoenix? Were you scared he wanted to replace you?"

A snarl rumbled deep in Victoria's chest, and she loosened her grip on Edward a fraction, as she leaned towards me. Emmett pounced on her, grabbing Edward by the legs and wresting him out of her hands. He shoved her into the wall, and Rosalie ran to Edward's side, pulling him into the hall and leaning him against the door frame.

I wondered for a moment why I hadn't been the one to run after Edward. I realized it was because my feet had carried me across the room to Victoria. Emmett's bulky frame was the only thing between me and her; the woman responsible for my fate.

It would be so easy to let Emmett hold her while I dismembered her body. All I would have to do was reach around him, and Victoria could be destroyed in seconds.

From behind me, I heard Riley struggling with Jasper and Jacob. He growled and kicked at Jacob, who threw a solid jab into Riley's chest with his head. Victoria fought Emmett, clawing at his arms in an attempt to reach me. Alice was at my side in an instant, while Esme flanked Jasper, taking hold of one of Riley's arms.

Carlisle stepped into the middle of the room and spoke, "Victoria, face it. This is over. You are vastly outnumbered in here. Not to mention, there is an entire wolf pack outside.

Victoria snarled and tried to shove Emmett, but he was exponentially stronger. He pushed her back against the wall. Her eyes flickered towards the open door.

"You didn't honestly think we came unprepared, did you?" I inquired over Emmett's shoulder. "Maybe you are as dumb as you look," I added, eliciting another nasty snarl from Victoria.

"Surrender," Carlisle continued, "and perhaps we can arrange for the Volturi to decide your fate instead."

"The Volturi?" I asked over my shoulder at the same time Victoria hissed at their mention.

"The Guard exists to deal with crimes such as hers in our world," Carlisle half-explained.

"Crimes?" Victoria screeched. She almost twisted away from Emmett, but Alice kicked her in the hip.

"Yes," Carlisle went on. "You kidnapped a human, held her captive, tortured and changed her. Then you left her alone in a large, populated city. The Volturi has rules about such actions, obviously."

"They'll throw us in the dungeon and starve us," Riley argued, trying still to break free. Apparently, Riley's only knowledge of The Volturi was of the fairy tale variety. In truth, there was no dungeon, no prison for vampires who broke the law. Only a swift destruction would await them if they were sent to Italy.

"Shut up!" Victoria snapped.

"Yes, please," Alice agreed. "Can't you bite him or something?" she directed her request at Jacob, bringing an inappropriate, yet entirely characteristic, chuckle from Emmett.

"The Guard has procedures," Carlisle began again.

Not interested in entertaining lofty notions of procedures and councils of vampire law enforcement, I spun around and cried, "Everybody shut the fuck up!" When the room went still, I whispered, "Alice."

I made my decision and looked to the tiny psychic beside me for a response. Alice blinked, looked at me thoughtfully, and smiled. I nodded.

"Carlisle," I called, "go with Rosalie. Take Edward out of here."

"No," Edward groaned from the door frame, his voiced strained and gravelly.

I ignored him.

"This is my fight now," I insisted.

"Are you sure?" Esme asked.

"Yes," Alice and I answered together.

Carlisle and Esme walked to where Rosalie knelt over Edward and pushed them through the side hallway. Alice leaned over and whispered into Emmett's ear. He reluctantly nodded before Alice seemed to disappear.

Ignoring Victoria's insistent twisting and moaning, I called across the room, "Jasper, you remember what we discussed?"

He smiled and winked at me. I glanced between him and Emmett as I positioned myself directly between Victoria and Riley.

"Now!" I screamed.

In a flurry of movement, things progressed quickly.

I tossed the satchels I'd gotten from Meara, one in each direction. Smoke and quick burning flames filled the air, giving the boys a momentary advantage.

Emmett grabbed Victoria by the hair and flung her into the rafters. At the same time, Jacob took purchase on Riley's arm with his canines as Jasper twisted away.

Riley's scream echoed off the metal walls as his body disconnected from the limb.

The concrete cracked where Victoria landed, and it took her a few seconds to regain her stance. By the time the smoke cleared and she and Riley realized what happened, all that remained of my backup was Jacob, shoving the bay door down with a paw, Riley's arm still dangling from his jaws.

**Edward**

I fought against my father, determined not to let Bella battle those two psychopaths alone. However, Victoria's choke hold had cracked the bones in my neck and collar bone, leaving me weak.

"Edward," Alice tried to reassure me, "Edward, stop. I saw it. She'll be okay. You need to sit still for a minute."

There were horrible sounds coming from inside the now closed warehouse; crushing blows and twisting metal, feral growls and vicious hissing, screams and dull thuds. I could just make out Bella's voice.

"Bitch!" I heard her yell a time or two.

"Fuck you!" seemed to be a predominantly favorite phrase, along with, "Go the hell!"

My family and I, Jacob waiting with us, stood motionless, staring intently at the building.

"She wanted this," Jasper told me privately. "She's a good fighter, and she needed to be the one to finish it."

My strength was returning, and I wanted nothing more than to tear the door off its hinges and rush in to save Bella. The idea of her going against the two of them by herself made me sick.

"She can't," I sputtered, willing myself not to take the first step forward.

"She _can_," Alice insisted, taking my hand.

"If anything happens to her…"

"It won't," she reiterated. "Do you believe I would have left her if I weren't sure?"

"Alice," I weakly protested.

"I know," she whispered, "but you have to trust me, and trust Bella." She squeezed my hand and looked pointedly at me.

I thought of Bella, waking up in that warehouse alone and transformed. Even though she would have been acutely aware of what had been done to her, the fear and thirst must have been overwhelming.

Yet with the power and bloodlust of a newborn, Bella had restrained herself and left the city without harming a single human being. She had built a life- on her own. She had learned how to live as a vampire, on her own. I realized that to think Bella wouldn't be able to handle this fight on her own as well was, quite frankly, idiotic.

I was preparing to speak again when we all noticed the sudden silence. We waited for what felt like an eternity until, slowly, the large bay door began to creak as it slid upward.

Instinctively, each of us crouched, ready to continue the fight if necessary. Alice giggled.

When the door was completely open, Bella strode into the moonlight, a head in each of her hands. I breathed a sigh, heavy with the release of fear and inundated with the relief of seeing her face. Once outside, Bella tossed the dismembered remains onto the gravel and brushed her hands off on the side of her jeans. She stood for a moment in silence, casting a parting glance at the two destroyed vampires at her feet.

Then, with a sense of purpose stronger than I'd ever seen, Bella walked up the hill.

"Jasper, Emmett," she announced nonchalantly, "you boys feel like burning down a warehouse?"

The entire family descended the hill, the men pausing to give Bella a soft pat on the shoulder, the women stopping to hug her. Jacob stepped away, toward where his pack was waiting, giving me one final nod before he loped off into the darkness.

Bella continued her climb, ceasing her steps when she was mere inches from my face. I stood, completely speechless, as she wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me.

**End Notes: Again, thank you if you've stuck around and waited for this! I appreciate you more than I could ever say! The end is near, my friends! :)**


	25. Chapter 25 Coming Home

**A/N: So, here we are. The End. It's hard to believe, but this is it. THANK YOU to each and every one of you who have been on this ride with me. I appreciate each and every one of you! :)**

**Claire- Honey, there are NO words! You are a dream, and I only wish there were some way I could adequately express how much you have done for me! I also wish there were some way to transport myself to England for the afternoon so we could chat and have some tea! ;) xoxo**

**J- I love you. **

**Well, that's it. The ride is over. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the trip Home. :)**

**CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE- Coming Home**

"**You leave home,**

**You move on,**

**And you do the best you can.**

**I got lost in this ol' world**

**And forgot who I am…**

**I thought if I could touch this place or feel it**

**This brokenness inside me might start healing**

**Out here it's like I'm someone else,**

**I thought that maybe I could find myself…"**

_**The House That Built Me, Miranda Lambert**_

**Bella**

The sun was rising over the trees, sending shards of gold through the wooden slats which gleamed as they danced along the floor. A light snow had fallen overnight, and I almost hated to ruin the purity with my footsteps. Dropping through the hole in the floor, I landed soundlessly at the base of the tree and headed towards the house.

Riley had indeed left Mr. and Mrs. Henry a note in Ashley's handwriting, along with a convincing voice mail from 'Sarah's father', so they hadn't been suspicious when their daughter was gone for two days. The family was getting up and ready to begin what they thought was just another typical Friday. Unfortunately for Ashley, nothing would ever be typical again. Of course, she didn't see it as unfortunate, but that's why I'd come to talk to her. I had to convince her that, as exciting as it may seem, the world she had discovered must remain a secret.

I was waiting on the sidewalk when Ashley left for school.

"Bella!" she gasped when she spotted me. She hurried over and hugged me.

Gently returning her affection, I sighed, "So much like me."

"Huh?" she eyed me, adjusting her coat.

"You just remind me of myself," I explained, "of the way I used to be with Alice. She should've frightened me, made me nervous, but she didn't, and I hugged her every time I saw her, too."

"Walk me to school?" she asked.

I nodded, and we started off down the street towards Forks High.

"I didn't think I'd see you again," she said once we'd made it down the block. "When I didn't hear from you after… well, I thought maybe you'd left."

"We'll all be leaving soon," I told her. "It's not exactly safe for us to be seen in Forks just yet. But we need to talk first."

"Look," Ashley said, shifting her messenger bag on her shoulder, "if this is about me keeping quiet, Emmett already gave me that speech so don't waste your breath. Metaphorically speaking, of course," she laughed.

"Of course," I couldn't help but laugh a little too. "As comforting as that is, Emmett has no idea what it is like to be a sixteen-year-old human girl, especially not one who knows what you know. But I do. I remember how it felt when I figured it all out."

"It's strange," Ashley smiled, "and a little unnerving, but almost in a good way. It is really awesome though, to know I'm not a freak of nature."

"I'm sure that part is nice," I said, "and I remember how exciting it is to have knowledge of a world most people believe only exists in movies. With your gift, with knowing you're not crazy or alone, you're going to feel like sharing at some point."

"But I can't," she sighed. "I learned that a long time ago, Bella."

"No," I confirmed, "at least not with anyone here, which is why you need this." I handed her a slip of paper. "That's my number on top, and the other one is Alice's. If you ever need anything, or just someone to talk to, you call one of us, okay?"

"It's more than okay," she smiled, taking the paper and folding it into her pocket.

"I'm going to have Jacob keep an eye on you as well," I explained. "He won't interfere. He'll simply be watching out for you from the sidelines, be available to help if you need him."

We had reached the street facing the high school. The buildings looked different than they had when I'd first arrived back in town. The soggy signs had been taken down, and the lightly dusted lawn remained clean. I closed my eyes for a moment and fought to remember a similar morning in January, half a decade earlier. A loud sigh from beside me halted my trip down hazy-memory lane.

"What am I supposed to tell everyone about where I've been?" Ashley wondered.

"Tell them you were sick," I answered, producing a perfectly forged doctor's note from my jacket pocket.

"Wow," she said, "you sure you guys can't stay? I've got mid terms coming up and all." She smiled ruefully and took the note. "Thanks," she whispered, "for, you know, saving my life and everything." She rolled her eyes in perfect teenager fashion at the end, but the silly gesture did not betray her sincerity.

"I'd say 'anytime' but I'd prefer never to have to do it again," I said with a wink.

Ashley looked to the ground and shifted on her feet. I could hear her heartbeat speed up slightly. She was anxious.

"So, I guess this is goodbye, then?" she asked.

Reaching over, I took her hand and held it gently. "For now," I replied.

She squeezed my fingers and nodded once before letting go and crossing the street. I was sure when she reached the other side, she turned back, but I was already gone.

Back at the Cullen house, Emmett was loading Rosalie's cases into the trunk of their rental car.

"When's your flight?" I inquired as I walked up the drive.

"Not until tomorrow morning," he said. "We're spending the night in Seattle. There's a B&B Rose wants to check out."

"Then back to Vermont?"

"By way of Milan," he laughed. "She says after all that's happened, she needs some retail therapy." Emmett closed the trunk and crossed his arms over his chest, eyeing me. "Did you see Ashley?"

I nodded. "She told me you had a little chat with her. Thanks for that, by the way. I think she gets it. Sooner or later, she'll need to talk about it, but I gave her my number."

"Is she okay?" he asked. "The kid might understand keeping quiet about the whole supernatural thing, but she did get kidnapped by a psychotic family member."

"Yeah," I agreed, "but I think she knows on some level it wasn't Riley who did those things to her, at least not the Riley she knew."

"Did we ever decide why he took her to begin with?" Rosalie had appeared in the yard.

"Spite?" I mused. "For her gift? To guarantee we'd come after them? Just for kicks?" I shrugged, "Who knows?"

"Well, at least she's safe now," Rosalie concluded.

"I'm going to ask Jacob to keep an eye on her anyway," I confided.

"That's probably a good idea," Emmett said. "I know we're supposed to be mortal enemies and all, but he's a good kid. It can't hurt her to have the dogs on her side."

Rosalie agreed and tossed the last of her bags into the car.

"I'm sure you two are ready to get out of here," I said.

"Will we be seeing you again soon, Bells?" Emmett asked, reaching out and wrapping me in a bear-tight hug.

"That remains to be seen," I half-joked.

"We love you," he whispered in my ear, "all of us. You know that, right?"

Remnants of human emotion prickled in my eyes and at the back of my throat. As I pulled away, I simply nodded.

I hugged Rosalie goodbye with a promise to call soon and stood in the drive as they pulled onto the road. When the car was out of earshot, I finally noticed how quiet it was inside the house. Glancing around, I realized the only car left was mine.

I ventured inside and found an envelope on the kitchen counter. My name was written on the front in Alice's elegant script. With unnaturally steady hands, I pulled the stationery from its hiding place and read:

_**Dear Bella,**_

_** The rest of us are headed back to Vermont. Carlisle and Jasper have work, and Esme and I have a redecorating project which is now severely behind schedule. Edward stayed behind. He isn't at the house, as I'm sure you've figured out, but if you think about it, you'll know where to find him. Good luck. Talk to you soon. (Oh, and Esme says to please lock up the house.)**_

_**Love, **_

_**Alice**_

Refolding the note, I put it in my pocket and walked upstairs to get my bags. On the way back down, I stopped on each floor, committing to my now perfect memory the look and feel of each room. Sometimes, a human remembrance crept up and I added it to the list of things I loved about the house. I knew all of Edward's things were gone, so I did as Esme asked and made sure everything was locked and secure before I left. Standing beside my car in the driveway, I said a quiet goodbye and left to find Edward.

I hurried through the forest, one thought in my mind. Standing at the break in the trees, I repeated the word over and over; the one word which had for so long been forbidden but was now the only one I could conjure up.

_Edward….Edward….Edward…_

My hands fisted at my sides, feet firmly planted, I felt a rush of panic when he wasn't there. Alice said I would know where to find him. Had I been wrong? Where else could he have been? I closed my eyes and kept repeating…

_Edward…Edward...Edward… _

His scent hit me like an oncoming train. Daring not to open my eyes, I inhaled sharply and listened closely.

"I'm here," he breathed against my cheek.

Letting out an unnecessary breath, panic was replaced with relief as I finally opened my eyes.

"Everyone else is gone," he said.

"I know. Alice left me a note," I replied.

"She thought… maybe we needed… some time…"

I took Edward's hand and led him into the middle of the clearing. The meadow was still and quiet, blanketed in snow. Standing in the center, I wished Spring was here so I could lay in the grass with Edward beside me, like we had the first time he had brought me to this place.

"Bella, I…" Edward squeezed my hand and pulled me closer to him.

"Do you want to know," I interrupted him, "what Victoria said to me right before I decapitated her?"

Edward's face went blank, and he asked, "What?"

I knew he wasn't asking what she'd said, but rather what I was doing by bringing it up.

"I'm serious," I said. "It's relevant."

"All right," he replied cautiously. "What did she say?"

"She said I was taking revenge on the wrong vampires. True, she was the one who kidnapped me, and Riley was the one to change me, but it was _your_ family who was to blame. She said when you, and I quote, 'decided it was time for a family pet' my fate was sealed. You had let me into a world in which I didn't belong, knowing the only outcomes were my transformation or my death, because humans can't be trusted with the secret." I let go of Edward's hand and walked a few paces, turning away.

"I realized then Victoria had no clue when she took me that you were gone. I guess she thought… well, I don't know what she thought. I know what she _didn't _think was you did trust me enough not to tell anyone about you. And somehow, in realizing you trusted me, I also realized something else."

I thought back to that moment in the warehouse. Victoria's eyes were desperate, and she believed she had changed my mind. The hold I had on her throat grew stronger, my hands digging into her marble skin, cracking the bones in her neck until my fingers met in the middle. The echo of her decapitation, the sound of ice falling off a glacier, rang in my ears. I heard Edward's voice.

"Bella?" he was saying. "What did you realize?"

I turned back to him, captivated by the curiosity in his eyes.

"I realized," I continued, "I was stupid not to see it before. For you to trust me enough to leave me with the knowledge of your existence, it had to mean you really did love me all along. Our nature tells us to trust no one. We are designed to manipulate and deceive, to possess and destroy. All vampires whom I've met are this way, except your family. And it's because you have each managed to tap into whatever part of you is left which is capable of love. You trust one another because you love one another. That's why you trusted me, too."

We stood for a long moment, Edward staring at me as he processed what I'd said. Finally, he spoke.

"You're right. I did trust you to keep the secret, but I was still wrong. I should never have left you like I did. I should have also trusted you enough to know you could decide for yourself if this was the life you wanted."

"It was never about wanting," I explained. "It was about finally feeling as if I actually belonged, and the only place I ever felt that way was with you."

I closed the gap between us and reached again for Edward's hands, knotting our fingers together and pressing my forehead to his chest.

He lowered his head and murmured into my hair, "Bella, I'm so sorry."

"Shh," I whispered, "no more apologies. Just promise me," I lifted my head and brushed the ghost of a kiss to his jaw, "this time will be different. No more fragile Bella who needs to be protected." I placed my lips near the corner of his.

"Partners," he breathed, opening his mouth enough to capture my lower lip.

"Equals," I responded, kissing him back. The taste of him permeated my senses, embedding into the core of my very being. Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and lifted me off the ground so we were nose to nose, eye to eye.

"I love you," I sighed against his lip.

"Forever," was his reply.

He kissed me once more and set me on my feet. Reaching into my pocket, I found my suddenly vibrating phone and pressed the Accept Call button.

Cutting my eyes at Edward, I answered, "Hey, Alice."

My eardrums would have burst if they could from the responding shriek of my name across the line.

"Alice," I laughed, "calm down!"

"So it's true?" she inquired excitedly. I could almost envision her bouncing up and down on her toes.

"Go shopping," I said. "Buy a bed for Edward's room," I bumped Edward with my hip and he laughed. "You can tell everyone," I said, taking his hand and heading out of the meadow, "we're coming home."


	26. Epilogue

**A/N: Not much to say here, as it's posting the same time as the last chapter. :)**

****

**EPILOGUE**

_**Seventy Years Later**_

"**I'm going home**

**To the place where I belong**

**And where your love has always been enough for me…"**

_**Daughtry, Home**_

**Bella**

Driving into Forks was like going back in time. The familiar 'Welcome to Forks' sign looked the same, only the population number had risen slightly since my last visit. Certainly, parts of the town seemed to have kept pace with the passing years. The traffic lights were new, and there were a few more. The outlying residential development displayed current architectural trends. Other parts, like downtown and the narrow, tree-lined streets surrounding had a more vintage feel. Of course, I was feeling a little vintage myself peering out of the window. This sleepy little town was where I'd grown up. Sure, I had spent my childhood in Phoenix, but Forks was definitely where I'd found myself, been introduced to the person I was supposed to become, and realized my destiny.

The high school was still standing, though the sign on the front lawn now read 'Forks Community Center', and there was a playground where the parking lot had been. The football field was currently overrun with tiny boys in oversized padding and jerseys, helmets jostling on their heads, brightly colored flags hanging from every waistband.

Fathers crisscrossed the sidelines, cheering and demanding better defense. Proud mothers and grandparents swarmed the bleachers, taking pictures whilst reining in squirming little sisters and brothers. It was moments like those I wished Emmett could have had a son. He would have made an excellent pee wee football coach.

As we passed the cemetery, I promised my father I would visit him soon. I thought about all I had to tell him as we drove along.

"Here we are," Edward's voice broke through my mental list.

Staring out of the windshield, I sighed, "It looks the same."

Truly, it did not. The place had changed, but the differences were cosmetic, and to me, it looked absolutely, perfectly, exactly the same.

"She's waiting," my husband said with a nod towards the house. A woman stood on the steps.

Edward parked the car and got out, walking around to my side to open the door. I hadn't opened a car door in decades it seemed, no matter how much I protested.

"Hi there," the woman called to us with a little wave.

She was young, late twenties perhaps, with long blonde hair and pretty brown eyes. Something about her felt familiar, though I couldn't put my finger on what.

"Good afternoon," Edward returned, walking over to shake her hand, "I'm Edward Cullen."

"Nice to meet you," she smiled.

And there it was; the Look. Years of seeing it and knowing why it happened, with every woman, everywhere, every damn time, didn't cull the need I felt to defend my territory.

"Bella Cullen," I offered, probably a little louder than necessary, "the wife." I hooked my arm through Edward's elbow.

"Of course," she said. "I'm Melanie Newton."

Edward and I exchanged a glance.

"Newton, did you say?" he inquired. "Any relation to Mike Newton, perhaps?"

"My grandfather's name was Mike," she answered, a puzzled look on her face.

"My family is from Forks," Edward quickly supplied. "I believe our grandfathers knew each other in school."

"Oh," Melanie grinned, "how cool. My Grampa Mike died a few years back, but I'll have to ask Grandma Jessi about it when I see her next week."

_Jessi? _I asked Edward silently. _As in Jessica?_

Edward raised his eyebrows and tried not to laugh.

_Well, that explains why she went all goofy when she met you. It's in her DNA, _I smiled.

"So," Melanie cleared her throat, trying to break herself free from her Edward induced coma, "would you like to see the house now?"

"That is why we're here," I smiled.

"Of course," she replied, turning to open the door. "The owner is home. She's very old and doesn't get around so well. She also insists on being here for every showing. She says she likes to get a read on the prospective buyers, whatever that means." She smiled apologetically, "She's really sweet though." As she opened the front door, she called out, "It's just me, Mrs. Johnson!"

"In the kitchen, dear," I heard the voice call from the other side of the wall.

The sound was older, but the timbre was the same. And she smelled the same. I hadn't laid eyes on her in ten years, but I would've known her anywhere. I squeezed Edward's arm, a plea to see her alone for a moment.

"Melanie," Edward turned up the charm, "why don't you show me around outside while Bella takes a look around in here?"

"Certainly," she readily agreed, turning on her too-high heels.

I waited for them to close the front door before I slowly rounded the corner by the stairs, towards the kitchen. The walls had been painted and the appliances were new. The table and chairs, though they had been refinished, were Maggie's. Beneath it all I saw Charlie's kitchen, and beyond that, my mother's.

Ashley was at the stove top, pouring tea into delicate china cups.

"I know you won't drink any," she said without turning around, "but Melanie would think it odd if I didn't offer."

I smiled, but didn't respond. Watching as she spooned honey into each cup and followed with a sliver of lemon, I was reminded of my grandmother. The memory was vague, but she had moved in her later years as Ashley did now - slowly, a bit shakily. Tray in hand, Ashley finally turned to me. The slight surprise on her face was gone in an instant, replaced with a sweet smile. I knew the look. Each time I'd seen her over the years, it had been the same. One's initial reaction to seeing someone who should have aged yet hasn't is hard to miss.

"I've been waiting for you," she intoned, almost scolding in a matronly fashion.

Her hands trembled so I moved to her side and took the tray, placing it on the table before helping her into a chair.

Sitting across from her, I sighed, "It's been too long. I'm sorry."

"Don't be silly," she chuckled. "I got a postcard from you just last month. Tell me, how was Egypt this time?"

"Fascinating as always," I indulged her. "Full of magic and wonder, even though the pyramids are looking a little disheveled and the mummies are drying up. And of course, it was crawling with vamps," I whispered. "You know," I winked with a shrug, "the usual."

"Ah, Bella," Ashley grinned, reaching across the table to take both of my hands in hers, "it really is so good to see you again." For a moment she rubbed my fingers; long and sturdy and cold, with hers which were so small and frail, and warm. "I knew it wouldn't be long before you came around," she whispered. "Melanie thinks I'm a bit off my rocker, I'm afraid," she winked and I laughed. "Passed up several good offers on the house, I did. I kept telling her I'd know when the right buyers came along. I've been saving this place for you."

"Thank you," I smiled. "It's been long enough I think. Even if Edward and I don't live here full time, it will be nice to have it."

"Oh, you'll live here," Ashley replied, tapping at her temple.

"All right, then," I nodded.

The front door opened, and I heard Melanie saying, "… usually has tea waiting…" As she came around the corner, she smiled, "See? Hello, Mrs. Johnson. I see you've met Mrs. Cullen."

"Yes, indeed," Ashley played along, standing up. "Melanie, dear, have some tea."

Melanie smiled politely and took a cup from the tray.

Edward held out a hand and, in his most gentlemanly voice, spoke to Ashley, "Mrs. Johnson, it is a pleasure."

"It certainly is," Ashley said, taking a good look at my husband in much the same way as Esme appraised him whenever we returned to the family after a long absence. Satisfied with what she saw, Ashley turned to Melanie and said firmly, "They're the ones."

"Excuse me?" Melanie asked, nearly choking on her tea.

"I said I would know, and I know," Ashley insisted.

Melanie glanced between Edward and I, surely wondering how such a young couple could actually afford a house, even one this old. Edward would later confirm her notion that showing the house to us at all had been out of courtesy, she never dreamed any sale would result.

"We are willing, and able I might add, to give you double the asking price," Edward announced.

Poor Melanie succeeded in choking on her tea. I got her a glass of water while she coughed and sputtered, "D-d-double?"

"I _really _want this house," I chuckled, handing her the water.

She nodded her thanks and gulped.

"I can see that," she said once she'd regained her voice.

"Why don't you run over to the office, dear," Ashley suggested, "and draw up the papers?" She helped Melanie to her feet, a somewhat humorous turn of the tables, and led her to the door. "We'll be right here waiting for you."

"Sure," Melanie stuttered, gathering her purse, "right… okay… I'll just… Double? Are you sure?" she looked at Edward, astonished. He laughed and nodded. "Okay then, I'll… I'll be back."

Edward, Ashley and I spent the afternoon catching up. We filled her in on our travels and the rest of the Cullens. She regaled us with tales of her grandchildren and the latest Bridge club gossip. She also brought us up to date on the wolf pack. Most of the boys had imprinted and quit phasing decades before, but a few from our time remained.

"Jacob was good to me," Ashley told us. "He kept me company and helped me sort out how to deal with everyday life. He stopped phasing of course, when he met Serena. But that was all right, since she introduced me to her brother, my husband. Once Jacob had a life of his own and knew I was taken care of, he didn't feel the need to be my protector anymore. It probably helped that Serena and Noah knew the truth. He still visits me on Saturdays, though," she smiled.

By nightfall, Melanie had returned and the contracts were signed. She left with a huge grin on her face and an even bigger check in her pocket. Edward and I said goodnight, promising to come back the next day. For her part, Ashley promised to keep our visit a surprise from Jacob.

We spent the night in the old house, as we called it. We hunted in the forest, raced each other along the old river and watched the moon rise from the meadow. Of all the places in Forks which held memories, the meadow contained the strongest meaning for both of us. This was the place where, as a human, I had truly seen Edward for the first time. This was where I'd found him again after the battle with Victoria and Riley. This was where he'd proposed and where, surrounded by our family and friends, we'd said 'I do'.

We made love in our meadow, isolated from the entire universe, until the sun came up again.

We headed back to the old house to change before we went back into town.

Edward suggested a detour on the way to the new house, and I found him steering the car towards the cemetery. I crossed the newly mown grass and sat down to talk to my father.

It had been seventy years since he'd died, seventy-five since I'd heard him say my name, yet I was as knotted with grief as I had been the first time I'd laid eyes on the stone with his name etched into it. I told Charlie about all the college degrees I'd earned, six in Literature, two in Math, one in Public Relations, three in medicine, even one in Criminal Justice. I had been a doctor, a lawyer and a teacher. I told him about my wedding and how bittersweet it had been without him there to give me away. Billy made for an excellent stand in, I assured him.

I filled him in on Mom, too, telling him how she had been made to believe I had died in a car wreck. She had finally managed to move on and live the rest of her life in relative peace with Phil.

After an hour, I pulled the weeds out of the ground near his headstone and adjusted the tilted flower vase. I said goodbye as I dusted off my jeans, and promised to return soon.

When we pulled the car into the drive of the house, _our _house, we both instantly sensed something was wrong.

Getting out of the car, and for once not rushing to my side, Edward said, "Jacob's here," just as I added, "he's alone."

Inside, we found Jacob, not as aged as he should have been but old and gray just the same, sitting in the living room. He looked up when he heard us enter, not a hint of surprise on his face.

He smiled weakly, "I figured it had to be you."

"Jake," I breathed and ran to him, wrapping my arms as far around him as they would go. I hadn't seen him in sixty years, and the sight of him filled me with a joy I'd almost forgotten I could feel.

Jacob took in a long, deep breath and held onto me tightly.

"Bells," he sighed. A moment later, he whispered into my hair, "She's gone."

I nodded and hugged him tighter. Edward came over and shook the hand Jacob dared to take away from me.

"Ashley had a stroke last night," Jacob explained, as I pulled my face from his chest. "The hospital called us since her kids all live in Seattle. I got there before she died and she…" he laughed at the memory, "she handed me this envelope and said I had to meet the new owners here today. She said I could consider it my last assignment on Ashley detail."

I smiled and, taking the proffered envelope, opened it to find two sets of keys along with a note in a familiar hand:

_**May your time here be as precious as it once was,**_

_**for as long as you wish it to be.**_

_**May your days be filled with laughter, love, family and friends, old and new.**_

_**May the magic of your world protect you and guide you into your next great adventure.**_

_**Take care of this place, and of one another.**_

_**Welcome Home.**_

I handed Edward the note and one set of keys. Then, looking around our house, I reached for him with one hand and for Jacob with the other, then smiled.

Welcome home, indeed.

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0oo0o0o0o**

**Final Notes: There is truly no way to express what this story, and the journey it has taken me on, means to me. I hope some of you, in some way, have gotten something out of it as well. Whether it was a laugh when you needed one, a thoughtful moment when you weren't expecting one, or just a nice way to pass the time on a lazy Saturday, I hope you each found something in here to love. **

**Thank you for your time, and here's hoping we'll meet again….**

**Xoxo Clara **


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